Disclaimer; I do not own Hetalia. It belongs to it's rightful owner(s), as do all the characters from said series. I wrote this on a whim, and I honestly do hate Hetalia but it is SO ADDICTING, NO? Blame my other half for making me want to write this. XDD This whole story is dedicated to you, Napkin!
Main pairing is PruCan, of course, but there are other hints of other pairings, including GermanyxItaly, FrUK, Spamano, SweFin, and even USxCan, but not to worry, this'll mainly follow the PruCan relationship~!
Chapter One
"God, stop your damn blabbering... No, I'm not going to come into work today because I'm too overly awesome to... Yeah, you wanna fire me? Good luck finding a better employee then... Dumbass."
Those were the parting words of the albino, self-proclaimed-Prussian man as he snapped his cellphone shut, surprisingly not breaking the thing. He cursed under his breath as he sighed, leaning against the counter of the bar he was sitting at, one of the dim lights overhead giving just barely enough illumination for him to see a drink pushed in front of him. He looked up, red eyes meeting baby blue ones as he gave an attempted smile, eagerly accepting the drink.
"That your boss?" Ludwig asked, taking a seat on the stool right next to his brother, ordering a beer from the bartender who passed by before staring at the albino, his expression serious.
Gilbert sneered, staring down at his drink that he gently swished around with his hand. He really didn't want to answer that, his brother already knew the answer anyway, so why was he wasting breath asking? It made no sense to him.
"Maybe." Was his only reply.
The blond German rolled his eyes, giving an annoyed huff of air as he sipped his own drink. "Gil... you know that's the fourth job this month, right? If you keep this up, no one's gonna hire you." He lectured, staring accusingly at his brother.
The albino scoffed, downing his drink as he lightly felt the small effects of dizziness start to make it's way into his mind ever so slowly. "Yeah, I know, I can count, dumbass." he retorted, ordering a whole bottle of whiskey this time, ignoring the disapproving shake of the head his brother gave him. "And someone will hire me, I'm too awesome to not hire." He bragged, a smirk coming to his lips as he opened the whiskey bottle that was set in front of him.
Ludwig rolled his eyes, not even going to say anything against the statement, he knew it was pointless, his brother had too big of an ego to ever see past the fact that he would probably end up living in the streets because of it, and whenever he tried to help, Gilbert just laughed and brushed it off. The idiot.
For a moment, the German siblings sat in silence, the music playing around the whole bar place echoing against the walls, doing more to annoy the customers than to entertain them. Gilbert took a large swig of his drink, all the stresses of the day easing off more and more every time the burning liquid entered his system. Alcohol fixed everything... Or rather, that's what the Prussian forced himself to think.
"So what're you gonna do about your job then? You won't be able to keep paying rent on your apartment if you have no money." Ludwig stated bluntly, finishing his drink and pushing the tinted glass bottle away. "And you definitely cannot live with me." He added, his tone serious as he stared at his brother with a look to match.
"Yeah, yeah, I know. I wouldn't want my awesomeness to impose on you and your little Italian lover." Gilbert all but spat back, rolling his eyes, annoyed as he took another long swig, gritting his teeth together at the oh-so-wonderful burning of the drink.
The German couldn't help but blush slightly, his eyes shifting to the side to stare at something unimportant. "You know that me and Feliciano aren't exactly on... proper terms. He went to go live with his brother and that Spaniard. I'm sure he'll be back soon enough though... hopefully."
Gilbert couldn't help but give a small, devious chuckle at this tidbit of information. "What did you do again, exactly? Oh yeah, didn't you cheat on him or something?" He cackled out, his laugh being heard throughout the whole room.
Ludwig tried to ignore all the stares they got from the surrounding people as he leaned in closer, attempting to keep his voice low as his fist clenched. "I most definitely did not do such a thing! I was merely drunk, and it isn't my fault that Romano looks exactly like Feliciano!" He hissed desperately. It also didn't help to know that Antonio now hated his guts for touching 'his little tomato', which earned him an embarrassed smack upside the head from the feisty man from Southern Italy.
"And I wouldn't be one to talk, considering the fact that you haven't been in a relationship in how long?" Ludwig stated quite loudly, interrupting another fit of cackles from the Prussian.
At this, the albino rolled his eyes, nearly finishing off his drink, the effects of the alcohol loosening his tongue up quite a bit. "Shut the hell up... It's not like I want to be in a relationship with anyone. A quick one-night-stand with any chick in this room will do. Relationships are just wastes of time, and no one is worthy of being with my awesomeness for more than one night." He replied, downing the rest of the bottle before ordering another.
Ludwig shook his head, sighing as he asked for another beer before turning back to his brother, staring at him quite pitifully. "You really need someone to put you in your place, man."
"Oh dear Jesus, not the 'ego lecture' again. I'm not listening to that pile of bullshit for the hundredth time." Gilbert responded, slightly grateful that they were off the subjects of 'relationships'. So what if he hadn't committed fully to dating just one person in a couple years? In his point of view, it was really a waste of time and pointless.
"Why would you just stay with one person and eventually get bored of them rather than sleep with and meet a million other people and stay entertained for life?" Gilbert asked, not exactly serious about the question as his second serving of hangover-in-a-bottle was pushed right in front of him. He eagerly took a large drink of it, wiping off his mouth with a satisfied 'aah!' afterwards.
Ludwig simply took a drink of his beer before answering; "If you honestly love someone, you'll never get bored of them no matter what. They surprise and intrigue you every single day, and you'll not ever want to be with anyone else." He said, quite surprised with his own response. Damn, he sounded like a professional! If only Francis were here to see him now and take back his 'love-deaf' comments and jokes he always made about the German.
Gilbert stared at him as if he just spoke a different language. "What?" He said after a minute before shaking his head, letting the words go through one ear and out the other as he proceeded to down his strong drink. "Whatever man. Why the hell am I even asking you? You're gay. " He added.
The German winced slightly at the term, remembering the day Gilbert had simply walked into his apartment without even considering knocking and ended up freezing in place as soon as he saw his brother over a much smaller, Italian man, his hands up the guy's shirt and his mouth on his neck. He stared for a moment, as did they, before he said, '...So THAT'S the Italian you always talk about... he looks like a guy, man.'
He found out later that it really was a guy.
"Antonio's gay, as is Francis, both of which you're rather close friends with. I'm surprised you're not, to be honest." Ludwig replied, gradually finishing his second beer.
Gilbert rolled his eyes again, growling. "Pft, I'm too awesome to become a faggot... and I'm pretty sure Berwald or whatever is gay too." He mumbled out, his tongue suddenly becoming lazy as his mind was in a haze, thinking about too many things at once, yet thinking of nothing at all.
"That Swedish guy you used to work with?" Ludwig asked, blinking as he saw Gilbert nod. "You still keep in touch with him? I thought you quit that job?"
"Doesn't mean we can't get together and hang out, not that he's much fun hanging out with alone, all he talks about is his Finnish 'wife', whom, from the pictures I've seen, is probably not a chick. Completely flat chested, man." Gil replied, shrugging. "Man, why's everyone goin' gay on me? Damn Americans... being surrounded by them must do something to your head." He said, tapping his finger against his skull for emphasis.
The German blond sighed, shrugging. He and his brother had moved to America on a whim. Feliciano was invited to vacation to America with Kiku, their Japanese friend, and as soon as he came back, the Italian practically fell in love with the place, and because Ludwig loved him too damn much to say no, he agreed. Frikkin' Gilbert just decided to tag along, his excuse being, 'Everyone here isn't awesome enough to hang around me. America sounds fun anyway.'
Ludwig was actually quite surprised to find so many foreign people around. Francis, who of course was quite the lover from France. Arthur, a stuck-up Englishman who moved to America on an invite from an american relative and eventually caught Francis' eye. The two were now in a 'relationship', they each claimed to love each other, despite the fact that they each saw other people. Whatever, let love-birds do as they wish. There was also Romano who moved to America to be closer to his brother and was already previously living with the Spaniard, Antonio, which Ludwig soon met afterwards.
"I swear to God there must be a gay Cupid flying around with his little gay wings and his gay bare-ass, shooting his gay arrows at gay people and turning them gay." Gilbert suddenly spoke up, slamming his fist down against the counter as he finished his whiskey, feeling a helluva lot more happier and stress-free than before. Ahh, the wonders of Alcohol.
Ludwig stared at him. "Maybe you should head home..?" He suggested, watching as his brother ordered yet another drink, this time being a bottle of strait vodka.
Gilbert laughed, as if that were the stupidest idea ever. "Fuck that, man... I wanna go find a quick chick to do. You go on and go home and cry about your Felix person thing." He stated, his voice slurring as he snatched the vodka bottle and hopped off the stool, wobbling a bit before looking around for a nice bunch of girls worthy enough to sleep with him and his awesomeness.
The blond rolled his eyes, finishing the last of his beer before getting up off the stool. "You sure? I could call a cab for you, or give you a ride home, I brought my truck." He offered, only to be ignored by the Prussian. He sighed, not even going to bother as he began making his way out of the bar. "Don't be calling me in the morning and yell at me for waking up in some random bed with a killer headache..." He muttered, pushing past the doors, leaving.
Taking another swig of the strong drink, the Prussian spotted his targets. A group of extremely hot chicks, giggling and messing with something in the middle of them all. Jackpot, man. He easily and quickly waltzed over, wobbling quite a bit before wrapping his arms around two girls instantly as he put on a drunk grin, his eyes half lidded and glazed over. "Well howdy, how'd one of you like to get banged into the wall in the alley outback?" He asked, more as a statement than a question, really.
The giggling girls had completely stopped, their smiles fading as they stared at the drunk stranger. This gave the Prussian a chance to see what it was exactly that they were giggling so much at. It was a small, blonde person with glasses that was about the same height, if not shorter, than the rest of the chicks. The hair was pretty long-ish and wavy, and Gilbert would think she were cute, had she not been completely flat.
Before the Prussian could think anything more, he was rudely shoved off of the girls as they all instantly walked away, leaving the other, smaller, flatter chick behind. Gilbert scoffed, calling each of the girls a 'whore' underneath his breath before his red eyes shifted onto the smaller person, his attention instantly being drawn to the rack-less chest as he examined the large, red maple-leaf right on the front of the sweater the chick was wearing. Was she Canadian?
Matthew's eyes widened as all the girls abandoned him in an instant, leaving him standing there in the shadow of the albino man. He couldn't blame the nice girls, they had simply gathered around him because he looked 'oh-so-adorable' and 'cute', he didn't expect them to stay at his side forever... but it would've been nice if at least one of them could've stayed to fend off the scary looking and drunk male before him.
"H-Hello..." Matthew whispered, looking around for an excuse to leave, thinking it too impolite to just up and walk away. Damn himself for being too nice, much less too scared and timid to ever dare piss off such an intimidating looking male in front of him.
Gilbert narrowed his eyes, his mouth pulling down into a mix between a grimace and a frown as he continued to stare at the other's chest, as if a pair of double-D's would instantly pop up.
But of course this didn't happen.
"I-I have to go..." Matthew whispered out, starting to scoot towards the side, only to instantly start backing up when the albino man started walking towards him. It wasn't long until Matthew was flat up against a wall, a hand placed right next to his head as he fell under the shadow of the drunkard. His eyes were wide as he stared up at him, watching as he took a large drink of what he saw to be vodka, hell, he could smell all the alcohol the man in front of him had consumed. "S-Sir..." he started, only to have his feeble voice trail off when the Prussian suddenly looked down at him.
"Ya honestly aren't gonna leave meh alone, are ya?" Gilbert asked, his voice slurring slightly as he pulled a corner of his mouth up into a smirk, staring down at the rather cute 'girl' in front of him.
"W-Well, I only came here to pick up my f-friend..." He whispered, already knowing what he said hadn't reached the drunk's ears. He needed to speak up, but his voice wouldn't go any higher! Damn his failed excuse at vocal chords... If he had a voice like Alfred's, now that would be one hell of a day.
"Ah, shaddup already, you're a cute chick and that's all I cares about righ' nowh..." Gilbert stated, the alcohol screwing with his pronunciation of his words, adding unnecessary sounds here and there.
Matthew opened his mouth to correct the unfortunately common mistake of him being a female but he was instantly cut off by a pair of drunk lips roughly pressing against his own.
The Canadian's eyes flashed wide as his cheeks flushed a deep, crimson color at the contact before he muffled out a protest, his hands coming up to attempt to push the other away, to no avail. This man before him was clearly stronger than himself by far, there was absolutely no way he would ever be able to outmatch him in strength.
"Mmph...!" Matthew muffled again, his lips shutting firmly as he felt a hot tongue lick his bottom lip, his fists still beating quite weakly against the man's chest, wishing that this would all stop. It didn't help when he suddenly felt a hand on his hip, slowly sliding upwards, cold fingers scraping his skin ever so slightly.
It was at that moment that Gilbert was suddenly ripped away from Matthew by a rather tall blond who looked almost exactly like the Canadian, but was obviously not as 'shy' when he suddenly shouted; "Get the hell away from him, man!" before punching the King of Awesomeness himself, right in the jaw.
Matthew gasped, bringing his hand up to wipe his mouth off with the back of his sleeve, not enjoying the taste of alcohol left behind by the Prussian one bit as he watched the albino all but fly backwards onto the ground, his drink flying out of his hand and crashing not too far away.
"You alright, bro?" Alfred asked, raising a hand to push up his glasses slightly as he looked at his smaller sibling. Matthew nodded, extremely grateful that the other had shown up when he did. Alfred opened his mouth, about to suggest that they leave because people were starting to gather, and since he worked here at the bar, he really didn't want to get fired. Hero's never got fired. And he was definitely a hero, especially considering the fact that he just saved his extremely close friend not a moment ago.
But alas, the Prussian wasn't about to give up that easily. "Fuck, man... that fucking hurt!" He shouted out, sitting up and rubbing his jaw. That would definitely hurt in the morning. "Shit..." Gilbert muttered, standing onto his feet, wobbling slightly as his glare locked onto the man that punched him. "You better fucking kiss my feet and apologize." He spat, pointing at the American.
Alfred simply gave a kind smile, raising both of his hands up, palms facing towards the aggressive Prussian in an 'I'm-not-a-threat' kind of pose. He just hoped such a foreign man would recognize the gesture. "Hey, man... I don't mean any trouble here.. I just wanna go home." He said, his voice even and smooth, catching quite a few attentions of the female portion of the spectators.
Matthew simply stood there, partially scooting to hide behind Alfred, his face still red not only from being 'attacked' a minute ago, but because Alfred was making a spectacle of them, and he rather hated being the center of such negative attention. "Aflred... let's just go, alright?" He whispered, tugging on the man's sleeve as his other hand was already in his pocket, his fingers wrapping around his car keys.
Alfred looked over his shoulder at the smaller male, giving a reassuring smile. "Alright, I'm drivin' though." He replied, before his attention was suddenly moved back onto the Prussian as the front of his shirt was roughly pulled by the albino, nearly ripping the fabric.
"Fuck that! You're gonna fuckin' get on your damn knees and kiss my fucking feet!" Gilbert shouted, no doubt spitting on the American in the process. "And you're gonna hand your little girlfriend over to me while you're at it!" He added after a second. Alfred seemed to stare at him, his eyebrows raised as deep blue eyes stared off with dark red ones, silent for a long moment.
And then Alfred burst out laughing.
Matthew jumped at the sudden, booming sound of the American's laughter, catching both him and the Prussian off-guard who quickly let go and stepped back from Alfred, giving him a look that said; 'you're-fucking-insane'.
"I-I'm sorry, man, b-but..." Alfred gasped out between fits of laughter, raising up a hand as his other arm was wrapped around his stomach, being slightly keeled over. A minute later he straitened up and wrapped an arm around Matthew's neck, pulling him into a slight headlock as he tapped the poor Canadian's head, staring at the Prussian.
"This lil' guy's a dude, man!" Alfred basically shouted, bursting out laughing again, as well as most of the crowd that had gathered around him. Matthew's face reddened up even more as his small hands struggled against the strong arm wrapped uncomfortably around his neck, wanting to just leave the place that very instant. The American seemed to sense this as he glanced down, and then put his eyes back on Gilbert, who had one of the most horrified expressions plastered onto his pale face.
"Yeah, well, it's gettin' late and I'm tired, so... we'll be heading home now." Alfred stated, removing his arm from around Matthew, which relieved the Canadian quite a bit as he rubbed his neck, frowning, when suddenly the American ducked down, wrapping his arms behind Matthew's knees and standing up again, lifting the poor boy over the other's shoulder as he turned and began walking out.
"A-Alfred...!" Matthew gasped out, his face reddening even more, if possible, as he beat against the brown leather of the pilot jacket the American constantly wore. He tried to struggle but the sudden, small squeeze he felt on his leg told him that Alfred wasn't going to put him down until the reached the car, so he simply hid his face in his hands, trying to hid himself from everyone who stared.
Alfred, before walking out of the door that was being held open for him by two kind people, turned around and gave a single wave towards Gilbert. "See ya later, mah friend." He said, walking out into the warm night a minute later, disappearing from the Prussian's sight.
"A-Alfred, c-can you please put me down now...?" Matthew whispered out as they walked through the small parking lot towards an old, red truck.
"Ya got the car keys?" The American asked, completely ignoring the request. Matthew nodded, simply waiting until they got to the damned vehicle before saying anything else. When they DID reach the truck, he was gently placed on the ground and he automatically handed Alfred the car keys as he made his way towards the passenger seat, waiting until the other blond unlocked the car first before getting in.
"You know I hate it when you do stuff like that... especially in public." Matthew spoke up as they began pulling out onto the road, away from the bar.
Alfred shrugged, one hand on the wheel, the other one resting on the sill of the car window. "Eh, yeah, but I don't get why. I saved your ass back there, s'all that matters, right?" He asked, glancing at Matthew who only seemed stuck on staring strait ahead at the road.
"Y-yeah, but if you keep doing this, people might think you're g-...ga-..." he couldn't bring himself to say the last word, he could already feel his cheeks re-heating up.
"Gay?"
"Yeah..."
Alfred scoffed, chuckling as he shook his head. "Bleh... I could care less what people think, and who knows, I might actually be gay. I don't have a problem with it." He said, smiling as he stopped at a red light.
Matthew turned his head to stare at him with wide eyes. "W-what?" he asked, in slight disbelief at the man next to him.
Alfred simply grinned at him, amused. "What? Scared that I might pull what that asshole did back at the bar?" he asked before returning his attention back to the road when the light turned green.
Matthew opened his mouth to answer but nothing came out, so he simply fixed his eyes to stare at his window, silent.
The American chuckled, reaching a hand over to ruffle the Canadian's hair. "C'mon, man, you've been my best friend long enough to basically be my brother, I promise you I will never try and molest you at night, since we share an apartment an' all..." Alfred trailed off, his hand staying on Matthew's head for a second longer before falling onto the wheel. "Unless, of course, you want me to molest you at night..."
Matthew instantly started hitting Alfred, shouting as loud as his voice would allow; "O-Of course not! Don't be so foolish! I-I'd never wish for such a thing...!" Noticing that he caused the truck to swerve a little, he stopped hitting his friend and simply settled for crossing his arms with a loud huff, turning away from the American. "I-I'm pretty sure I'm straight... so no, keep your hands to yourself, please."
Alfred laughed. "Pretty sure? Don't sound too sure to me." He mumbled rather loudly, still smiling, amused.
Matthew began to pathetically attack him the rest of the way to the apartment, shouting; "I'm straight, I'm straight, I'm straight, I'm straight!" Over and over and over again to the foolish American, knowing that what he was saying was true.
Or at least, he was pretty sure it was true.
So whatd'ya guys think? Not too bad for a first chapter, eh? I suppose depending on reviews, I'll continue it. XD But it looks like Prussia got into a bit of trouble, eh? Poor Canada though, just seems like a toy to everyone. Let's go with a show of hands to see how many people think he's as strait as he claims to be! ...One hand... LOL.
I promise to try and update soon~! And I'm sorry if I wrote anyone out of character, I hope it wasn't too bad. XD Kinda long, in my opinion. e3e;; Anyway, please read and review~!