I could feel my heart beating faster and faster as I walked ever nearer to the famous idol group, No Name's concert.

It was honestly ironic that their band name was No Name, seeing as they were far from that. They were known internationally despite only debuting two weeks ago, with their popular album, Attack on Titan.

The most famous member of this three people group was Levi Rivaille, with his sexy physique and sharp tongue. He was honestly god's gift to humanity, in my opinion.

He was also another reason why No Name was so famous. He was already a model before he joined the music industry, where everyone found out that he had a fantastic (-ally sexy) voice and practically the whole damn world was at his feet.

Maybe that was why their first song was called Kneel. Huh.

I mean, honestly? I would gladly kiss Levi's shoes if he told me to.

I know that it would be weird to some people that I was twenty-one and still a major superfan of No Name, but I would happily tell you that there were many across the world.

My non-biological sister Mikasa Ackerman is really, really lucky. She has the privilege to work with Levi himself, as a fashion consultant for my secret lover.

I mean, it's not really a secret that I love him, but everyone around me thinks that it's the normal kind of idol-and-fan love. I'm not talking about that.

I'm talking about the real kind. The deep, dark abyss that we call true love, the it's-too-late-once-you've-fallen-in type. It takes a very, very long time to crawl out of, but right now I'm content staying at the bottom.

And if you haven't guessed yet, yes, I'm gay. I came out to Mikasa a few years ago, and she even cried, telling me that it didn't matter and that she still loves me no matter what.

With his piercing gaze that always seemed to be brimming with secrets, Levi immediately drew me in.

He lured me in and chained me there, right by his side with a single look, but he never pays attention to me, either.

That's because he never noticed me; truly noticed me.

I've only ever saw him once in the flesh, and that was when I was released early from my university one day and Mikasa picked me up mid-work and decided to bring me to her workplace.

We lived together in the same apartment in the city, so she brought me along to work so that we can have dinner together later, for the first time in quite a while.

"Sure, why not." I had coolly replied, but inside I was positively screaming.

It was simply awesome. They were shooting a scene for their new song Caged's music video, and Mikasa had asked me to stay around the corner of the studio so that I wouldn't get in the way while she sorted out some clothes with another girl called Petra.

Mikasa's colleagues had been giving me curious looks, but other familiar faces, like my past classmates Sasha Braus, Annie Leonhart and Marco Bodt, were giving me bright (Annie, not so much…) smiles.

After they looked around to see if they were needed (Annie was dragged away by a tall, dark guy), Sasha and Marco headed over to my corner and caught up with me.

"Didn't expect to see you here, Eren!" Sasha quipped. Marco just smiled at me from behind her, who in a very Sasha-like fashion, whipped out a whole roast chicken leg from God knows where.

Both of us stared as Sasha continued eating without a care in the world, still happily looking at me, expecting me to say something.

I simply laughed, "You haven't changed after all these years, Braus."

"Whai shoudd I?" Her muffled voice made me jump away when some pieces of chicken flew out of her mouth.

We all laughed again, and Marco shyly asked me about how his boyfriend Jean was doing in school.

Surprisingly, the dumbass Horseface Jean Kirschtein actually managed to make it into my university, but was mostly in separate classes from me.

Jean was a total intolerable dick at the start of the year, and still is, but is less aggressive now that his real dick actually had some action...mostly with Marco.

They got together after many years of unrequited love (on Marco's part) and you have no idea how happy I was when Jean stopped pestering (more like harassing) Mikasa and stuck with Marco instead.

"Um... Jean needs some help. But don't worry about it, I'm helping him." I gave Marco a guilty smile, but he didn't seem to notice just how much I had to sugar-coat that sentence.

In truth, Jean was failing almost all his classes and he was losing credit for skipping projects, but I planned to help him, to repay Marco for all the help he gave me back in Attack High.

Marco glowed happily at me, while Sasha questioned why I was here.

"Mikasa's taking me out to dinner after work. I mean," I chuckled, "...it's been at least two years since we ate a proper meal together. Unless you count microwave popcorn and poptarts a 'proper meal', then sure."

The three of us laughed, simply enjoying each other's company and catching up on experiences in our lives that others missed.

However, one of the band members (sitting on one of the chairs in front of the giant mirrors), Hanji Zoë, soon beckoned Sasha and Marco over, leaving me alone once again.

I gave them a little wave and a smile as they waved back and jogged over to Hanji, inquiring what was wrong.

I sighed and sat on a wooden chair behind a long table, relaxing and deciding to observe the scene instead.

It was odd, the way the atmosphere was relaxed, yet hectic at the same time, if that was possible.

Everyone was casual and happy enough, but you could tell that everyone each had their own schedules to adhere to, in order to complete the whole scheme that was this music video.

I rested my head on my hand which was partly covered by my favourite gray sweater due to the coldness of the studio (Seriously, the AC was blasting), moving only my eyes and taking in each section of the large studio.

At a corner, Sasha was talking rapidly with her hands gesturing wildly, obviously trying to prove an important point to Hanji because she had set down her precious chicken leg on a random paper plate.

I smiled a little at that.

A little further, Annie and the tall, dark guy earlier were still talking, each holding their own clipboard and occasionally pointing to certain spots, and then jotting something down.

Moving on, three different women were each working on each idol's makeup - Hanji Zoë, with her sleek mahogany hair and careless look, Miche Zacharias with his faint sideburns and droopy, straw-coloured hair that covered part of his face, and last but not least, Levi Rivaille, the star himself.

"Woah, he's cute," I murmured, a little startled. Of course, his face was one I could recognise immediately, with it plastered on almost every advertisement in the world, whether it be for clothes or cars, or even cleaning products. But seeing it in person was definitely a shock to the system.

His eyes were gently closed, his long eyelashes casting shadows on his cheek while the woman in front of him dusted some sort of powder all over his face. When the woman tapped lightly on his shoulder to signal that she was momentarily done, he opened his eyes and - uncannily - turned straight to look at me.

I was stunned. His eyes were a burning, liquid mercury, which seemed to reflect all the light in the world.

My heartbeat stuttered...and immediately picked up in double time.

I blinked, but the makeup artist told him to tilt his head upward to get to his neck, which he did, throwing his gaze away from me, along with my heart.

And just like that, I fell in love.

I know most would think that it was too quick to be true love, but I could tell the difference. It wasn't like I hadn't got a crush before.

It happened really suddenly. Just within two seconds, he easily got ahold of my heart and ripped it out if my chest with his gaze alone. He owned it now.

I didn't mind, and I still don't.

I don't mind at all.

I've tasted something I never thought would ever happen to me, and I'm going to appreciate it.

I gazed at Levi's straight back and chiseled chest, the way the plain black tee was stretched nicely across his torso. I observed the way he gently brushed his dark, dark hair away from his face when he had to turn his head and it tickled his forehead. With every small action I saw he did, I fell deeper and deeper in love with him.

I continued staring at Levi for a while, but decided that I was being a creep about it and turned away (after putting in much effort).

I forced my head to turn in the other direction, into another corner where Mikasa and her colleague Petra were huddled around a huge pile of clothes, next to another few hundred racks of more clothes, some costumes looking totally bizarre with things like peacock feathers sticking out.

Petra pointed at something in the pile on the floor, while Mikasa shook her head with her fingers on her chin, gesturing to another outfit and suggesting another example by pulling out a princely outfit off the rack.

By how constant I saw Petra mouth the word "Levi" and glance the idol's way with her gaze filled with a now familiar emotion, it was clear that I wasn't the only one who loved the handsome man.

'It's unsurprising', I tried to convince myself. 'Being an idol and all.' But I could still feel an iron grip taking ahold of my heart and squeezing it so tightly that I felt like my heart had shrunk and dropped into my bowels.

What is this feeling?'

I gingerly put my head onto my sweater-covered arm, breathing in the familiar smell and exhaling slowly to calm myself down.

It suddenly clicked.

Jealousy.

I berated myself, 'What are you jealous about, for freak's sake! You just met the guy (not even officially) and you're behaving like that??'

"Sorry…" I then apologised quietly to myself, like the weirdo I am.

"What did you do now?" A familiar voice spoke with humor from above me.

I snapped my head up and saw a head of blonde hair, still in the same bun it's always been in since high school days.

I smiled sort of awkwardly, "Hey Annie." She pulled out another chair and sat down across me, on the other side of the table. I suddenly had a strong sense of déjà vu.

With the slight raise of her eyebrows, I could tell that she was thinking about it too.

We were both in our last year of high school when Annie had seized the opportunity where Mikasa was off at a Student Committee meeting and asked if I wanted to grab some fast food for lunch together.

The clueless me had agreed, not understanding why she refused anyone else's offer to join us.

After we both sat down, across each other in a private booth with two trays of food, she confessed to me quietly, causing me to choke on the double cheeseburger.

"I'm sorry, w-what?" I had wheezed. She handed me her drink, and I gulped it all down before looking at her, bewildered.

I would never forget the way Annie fiddled her thumb in the most un-Annie-like way, before she whispered it again. I was still tactless and dumb at that age, so in the end I had rejected her quite ruthlessly.

She looked at me, hurt in her eyes, and she stood up and ran off without another word.

That wasn't the last time we spoke, obviously, but it was the biggest obstacle that stood in our friendship for the longest time, and both of us awkward homo sapiens didn't bother resolving it.

And now that we're both here as adults, and I can't help but feel quite guilty.

I cleared my throat, "Umm, Annie-" She just gave me her signature millilitre smile and shook her head, showing that she didn't want to talk about it.

"...okay then, I shall respect your wishes," I laughed and nodded, but it sounded more like I was choking than anything.

She chuckled before she sighed. "You're still just the same, aren't you, Eren?"

I scratched the back of my neck nervously. "I guess..?"

Then there was silence.

"This is the most awkward conversation I've ever heard. Like seriously, even I'm feeling awkward and I'm not even part of it." Both of us looked up at Sasha, who moved her gaze from me to Annie and back again, this time holding a cream cheese bagel in her hand.

Attempting to break the tension, I reached out a hand, "Can I get a bite?"

Sasha immediately retreated six or seven steps, hissing at me like a feral cat and pulling her dear bagel close to her chest.

I sighed, "I forgot you don't like sharing your food…" Sasha was still hissing, but now more calmly and with a mouth full of bagel.

"I can take you out and grab some coffee from nearby if you want…" Annie gestured that she had to get her purse from her handbag, and I could tell this was her small way of repaying, of saying sorry, even though the responsibility should lay with me.

I smiled, agreeing. I definitely didn't harbour any feelings for her, but I was just happy that we had a chance to reconcile. The tension was really too much for me.

Annie returned with her purse a little later, and I spotted Sasha poking her head over a coffee table, looking as though she'd seen something terrifying. "Take me too!" She was quite desperate, from her tone.

Amazingly, Sasha had finished her bagel and was currently horrified to see that her food stash in the studio was empty.

I laughed lightheartedly. "Yes Sasha, since I haven't seen you all in a long time, see if you can get Marco to come with us as well. My treat, though you'll have to give me the location."

She zoomed off, grabbing Marco while Mikasa came over, wiping sweat off her brows.

"Ah, it's quite hot here…" she started fanning herself lightly, while the rest of us are gaping in disbelief.

Hot? Sasha was practically wearing winter wear, and even Marco, who usually had a much better tolerance to the cold, had to wear a sweater, like me.

"Mikasa...don't you think you should take off the thing around your neck?" I suggested tentatively.

Her hands automatically went up to cup it defensively. "Hey, I like it this way. You gave me the scarf after all, you're one to complain."

Marco's eyes were wide in realisation. "You've been wearing it all throughout high school as well, but I never knew it was Eren who gave it to you!"

"All through junior high, high school and what I did of college." Mikasa added, rather proudly.

Sasha was back with Marco in tow. "Do you even wash it??"

In my peripheral vision, I could've sworn I saw Levi shift around in his seat uncomfortably.

Probably my imagination. And there's no way he was listening anyway, so it must be something the makeup artist did.

"Of course I wash it, I'm not as dirty as you, whose bed has pizza crumbs stuck on it and you change the sheets like once a year," Mikasa scoffed, and I swear to all Gods above that Levi twitched.

"Hey! For your information, I just bought new sheets!" Sasha was indignant.

"Did you use it though?"

"Of course!"

"Did you wash it, or at least beat it before putting it on?" Mikasa smirked.

"...no?"

All of them facepalmed, but I didn't, deciding to keep one eye on Levi.

He twitched again.

"Aha!" I impulsively shouted in glee, and all of them were now looking at me curiously.

"Is...something the matter, Eren?" Marco questioned. By this time, my face was already so hot that I could fry eggs on it.

I coughed in embarrassment. "Um, I just remembered something, is all...now, shall we go get that coffee?"

"Oh! Can I come with you?" Mikasa asked, clearly worried about me, giving it away when she glanced at Annie for a split second.

I smiled at Mikasa. "Don't worry about it, I'm sure you're busy. Anything you want? I'm going to a café somewhere around here. I'll be near."

She eyed me for a few more moments before finally letting me go.

She waved us off with a "Stay safe, and not too long!"

I had kissed her on the cheek and hugged her goodbye.

And in the end, I didn't get to eat dinner with Mikasa after all because I accidentally ate my fill after eating at the café.

I snapped out of my reverie when someone pinched me on my arm.

"Eren, are you alright? You've been blanking out for a while now." My best friend Armin had a worried look on his face. "Oh and you're...um...drooling…"

I swiped my hand across my mouth, feeling my face starting to warm. "I'm fine, Armin, just excited! I'm finally going to a No Name concert!"

Armin chuckled.

I huffed and turned my head away, continuing to bounce in excitement and clutch my ticket to my chest. Even my knuckles were starting to turn white.

"Eren...you're gonna crush your tickets at this rate." Mikasa finally returned, handing me and Armin each a lightstick.

Armin thanked Mikasa, but I was squealing over the fact that I have a lightstick, almost totally ignoring Mikasa.

"Thanks Mikasa, it's all because of you that we're getting the front row and these lightsticks." She dismissed Armin's gratitude on our part with a wave of her hand, instead fixing her attention on me.

"Eren, your collar is unbuttoned." She rushed forward, fingers messing around with the buttons and then slowly moving upwards to my hair, brushing it first this way then that.

I pushed her away, "Mikasa, it's fine! I'm not your little brother or your kid!"

"But…" I cut her off, "No buts..!" Armin sighed at our usual banter. "It's alright, you guys, now that Mikasa has tidied you up-" that received a glare from me, causing him to cough.

"...can we please head in now?"

Mikasa shook her head. "No, we're waiting." We looked at her in confusion, "Why?"

She pointed to a giant mass of people ahead of us. "We're standing in the queue."

Both Armin and me were startled.

"This is the queue??" We asked in unison.

Mikasa gave a solemn nod.

"Mikasa, you work with them or something right? Can't we just jump the queue?" I was desperate.

"But we already did. We jumped 600 spaces already. I got us priority tickets and free lightsticks as well."

Our jaws hit the ground now.

Armin turned to me. "Hey, Eren, can we just leave and come back later? This is gonna take hours, and I'm hungry…"

"No! The queue is only gonna get longer!" I was adamant.

"Eren-" "Armin!"

We suddenly heard a familiar name being said over the buzz of the crowd through the intercom.

"Ackerman, Mikasa Ackerman and party of two others with priority tickets, please proceed to Ticketing Counter D immediately to be admitted. I repeat..."

We were confused, but we followed the instructions anyway, but not before receiving envious glares from many around us as they realised who we were.

"Hey Mikasa, who did you call?" I whispered.

"Huh? I didn't call anybody…" She was just as confused as I was.

"Then why are we getting immediate admission?"

She shrugged, pulling her scarf tighter around her neck - a nervous habit.

On the other side of the admission counter, the bubbly girl I recognised as Mikasa's colleague Petra Ral was waiting for us beside the guy who would check our tickets.

"Hey Mikasa!" She smiled. "Oh, and you must be Eren?" She turned to me.

I was surprised. "Uh, yes! How did you know?"

Petra waved. "Oh, Mikasa talks soooo much about you at work, I reckon everyone knows who you are by now." She hummed in thought for a moment, "Not that she talks much anyway, but when she does, it's Eren, Eren, Eren." Armin chuckled quietly.

She smiled at us warmly. "And you came over last time, didn't you? We the Studio Corps finally have a face to match the name."

I laughed while Mikasa's face bloomed, instead opting to pull her scarf further up her face (covering her mouth now) and hand over her ticket to the guy silently.

The muscly dude scanned her ticket and let her through, followed by the rest of us. Mikasa walked ahead (still embarrassed, probably), adjusting her scarf again.

I looked at my surroundings in awe while Armin introduced himself to Petra.

I took a deep breath as my heart threatened to escape my ribcage.

'Alright Levi,' I thought. 'I can't wait to see you. If only you knew my true feelings.'