Chapter 1; The secret
"Because… Because I love you Mr Bates, I know it's not lady like to say it but I'm not a lady and I don't pretend to be."
Oh, if she only knew how much he loves her, how much he wanted to tell her that he does love her. More than anything, he just couldn't. She's too good for him and getting her involved in all his problems wasn't right. He's married for god sake and she didn't know… He just couldn't let this happen.
"You are a lady to me and I never knew a finer one"
Why did she have to be so beautiful? He had fallen in love with the woman right in front of him, his best friend and he isn't even in love with the woman that is his wife. This was too dangerous… Thank god, we got interrupted by this man who asked if we wanted a ride on his trailer but he could only take one with him. Of course Anna wanted John to go, so he sat down on the trailer and watched her walk after them as they went further away from her. He couldn't believe that she loved him, it made him feel so horrible at the thought, she was so young and was wasting her time on a man like him. She could have anybody else but she picked him. A married old cripple.
John had to get some air before he went to get his lordship ready for bed. He stood out in the courtyard as he heard some footsteps getting closer. Then he saw her, Anna. He had to tell her, for her best.
"Mr Bates."
"Anna, I.. I haven't been completely honest with you. I have something to tell you."
"Oh, okay."
"I, I'm married."
Then, he saw her face in that moment. She looked so disappointed, god, he had let her down. How could he ever make it up to her? she believed in this, she believed in them.
"Anna, I'm sorry, I'm sorry that I didn't tell you earlier. As much as I wanted to. I'm sorry for being such a disappointment."
"I told you I love you, I feel so stupid now."
"No, don't say that. You're not, in fact I wish I wasn't married. It's complicated. Anna, please dream of a better man."
"I can't… because there isn't one."
He slowly grabbed her hand, her tiny soft hand. And he looked into her eyes, saw how much she wanted this, it felt so right to be near her like this. Then, he moved his sight to her lips, he had wanted to kiss them for so long. Desperately dreamed of what they tasted like. He leaned down, on the way to her lips. He was about to kiss her. He was about to do he only thing that he shouldn't do but he couldn't help it. He saw her close her eyes as he did the same. And then, someone opened the door and they parted away from each other. She looked into his eyes for one second and then turned around, walking quickly away from him. Hoping that someone didn't see them.
"Anna."
She turned around, saw him standing there, so worried.
"I do love you, Anna. More than words can say."
She smiled and went inside with a big grin on her face.