Author's note: Welcome to the first episode of Mokap and Meat Adventures! It's a stoner/sitcom style comedy story, not a serious drama, so don't expect that. They are some of my favorite joke characters, in any game. Mokap is a guy in a mo-cap {motion-capture} suit for crying out loud! And he's a friend of Johnny Cage.
I should mention that I am using MK4 Meat, where he's just a skeleton covered in blood with some rotting flesh hanging off. In Armageddon he looked like Drahmin minus the flies and club and loincloth. That was lame. Like really lame.
I will have OCs but they will be canon because there is a character creator in Armageddon. I will explain how it works in universe. It is a high-powered magically-fueled cyclotron DNA writer. It is a steampunk looking machine that is sort of like a 3D printer that makes people. It was invented and fabricated by Kano so he could make another Sonya Blade beacuase he is obsessed with her. It was stolen by Jax and he made it a public commodity. It is located in Times Square and anyone can use it for free by order of the president.
Now, I think that's all for now. Enjoy the story. R&R if you want.
The light of the evening sun shone bright through the window of the apartment of good friends Mokap and Meat, two dyed-in-the-wool best friends who hang out, smoke weed, and eat pizza. Today we see them sitting on their beat-up, ugly old couch, trying to figure out a way to get some sweet cash.
"Well, I may have an idea. But it's a little crazy." said Meat, as he tapped his bloody jaw with a skeletal finger.
"And what is that, my fine compadre?" commiserated Mokap, as he attempted to re-affix one of his mo-cap ping pong ball things that had come loose.
"Maybe one of us should get a job?" suggested Meat.
They both looked at each other for a second, before shouting, "FUCK NO!"
They brofisted, then took a hit of weed. Meat walked over to the fridge, and pulled out a canned ham, before walking over to the couch. He sat down, popped the lid real swag-like and got ready to eat that shit.
"Whoa whoa, slow down bro. You don't wanna eat that shit. It's old as fuck." warned Mokap.
"It ain't that old, man." protested Meat.
"You kidding? It's practically an antique! It's older than your mama!" shouted Mokap.
"So? I'm a fucking skeleton, bitch! It's don't matter how old it is!" said Meat with a shit-eating grin.
"Truth, bro." said Mokap, as he rolled a dooby the size of a baseball bat.
"Hey, you wanna go easy on that, bro?" said Meat.
"Naw man, I need this shit right now. I'm down. I haven't had mo-cap work ever since that producer's strike started. Not a movie made in Hollywood for six months. Fuck."
They both sat there, a sadder pair you have never seen in your life. Meat sat there, thinking. Life hadn't been this bad for them in a while, not since the tournament where they both almost died. Good thing Mokap's friend Johnny Cage (or J-Cage as they call him) was there to save their asses. Meat decided to go for a walk in the glowing city twilight.
"I'm out. Later bro. Can I hit that shit before I leave?" said Meat, as he motioned toward the giant dooby.
"No. I need this."
"Whatever."
Meat stepped out into the bustling crowds of New York City. Their apartment was in the Bronx, and in a rough part too. Of course, they're fighters, so they don't need to worry about that shit. They just whip ass, all day all night. Meat slipped upon his glistening skull of a head a black and silver striped fedora, one that was lined rather pointlessly (since he is a skeleton, after all) with the softest fuckin' silk in the world, as he walked along the narrow, terrifying streets. Some people gave the gore-drenched skeleton weird looks, but he just gave them a mean look, and they didn't bother him further.
Meat pulled a pipe out of the remaining sinew of his torso where he stored it. He packed it with the secret supply of weed that he kept in his hollow eye socket, and lit up with the assistance of the gold monogrammed lighter that had been passed down through his family for countless generations. As he sucked the smoke, it wafted out of him. He still got high, somehow. Whatever.
He stood by the river, and looked out on the gorgeous skyline, a dark, angular silhouette, lined by fog and neon. You could almost hear the dark moody sounds of the song 'In This Light And On This Evening' by Editors playing.
"We seriously need some green. The paper kind. And the weed kind too. We out of both. He out of work. What the fuck can we do?" mused Meat.
He sat there, watching the glowing orb that is the sun go down, as he smoked as heavily on his pipe as he could. The drugs assaulted his brain with inspiration. As pinks and purples of frightening shapes swirled before his eyes, as terrifying hallucinations, aberrations of Lovecraftian design beset him, he screamed an inhuman cry, and then all was clear.
"I know how to solve all our fuckin' probs, fo sho. If Hollywood is gonna fuckin' hold out on us, then godammit, we gonna make our own fuckin' movie! Shit, I gotta tell Mokap!" shouted Meat ecstatically.
He took off back towards the apartment, his red, bare-bones feet cla-clacking on the cracked dirty sidewalks that led to home. He puffed weed the whole time, of course, which turned his short jog back home into a psychedelic trip worthy of the ages.
He ran up the stairs to their shithole place, and kicked down the door. Mokap was there, his eyes glowing red as he practically deepthroated the giant dooby he had made. His chest heaved, and smoke poured out of his bleeding nose like muddy water out of a clogged spigot.
"Yo cuntbucket, what the fuck have you done to yoself? Shit, bitch, like damn." exfoliated Meat.
Mokap turned his head. The dooby slipped out of his gaping maw and smashed on the floor, exploding and sending charred pot and glistening sparks everywhere. Mokap gurgled out gibberish, and twitched wildly, as if he was suddenly struck by bolt of Rayden's legendary Elder God-given lightening.
"Bad trip, huh bro?" joshed Meat. His attempt to lighten the mood failed, as he realized that Mokap had OD'ed bad. His mood sank futher into the dismal mire of situational depression when he discovered that Mokap's giant elephant trunk of a dooby had ignited their stained, smelly, filthy and disease-ridden carpet. It was soaked with gasoline that they filled their blunts with. Meat also used that same gasoline to make his infamous triple-strength krokodil, which doesn't kill him because as we've established, he's a fuckin' skeleton.
Anyway, their apartment and everything in it was burning down in crimson flames. All their drugs were ignited, and soon the whole damn building was stoned to death. Mokap breathed in the fumes and started to freak the fuck out, heaving himself out of his chair, his ball covered suit clinging tightly to his fat yet muscular body. His normally smooth, softly-featured face twisted into a dark expression of pure, potent rage.
"Man, if I only knew some Pauly Shore bits. Those always calm him down, that is his favorite comedian, as I fuckin' know." muttered Meat to himself.
Finally, Meat leaped forward and did the famous MK uppercut, knocking Mokap out the window. He hit the pavement with a sickening splat, and screamed out before just moaning in pain. Unfortunately, he landed right in front of where the fire engine was about to park, and it ran him over, and then parked with the back wheels on top of him.
"Whoops, sorry bro." called out Meat. He jumped down out of the window, and landed next to the truck. Mokap screamed out, "Geft thest sdhting owf uv meye!", but his words were garbled from the tire in his mouth.
"No prob, bro. I got this motherfuckin' shit." assured Meat. He pulled back his awesome bony fist and punched the truck so hard it exploded. The foam from the truck hit the building and put the fire out. The day was saved!
"Well this sucks" understated Mokap.
"No fuckin' shit." agreed Meat.
"What are we going to do now?" asked Mokap.
"I know. I figured out all our probs. We gonna make our own fuckin' movie."
"DUDE. That's a great fuckin' idea!"
"I know, bitch."
"High-fist, bro!"
And they jumped did a high-brofist, it was fuckin' sweet. As they did it, they shouted, "PELICAN!" their beloved catchphrase.
"Hey sorry I wouldn't let you take a hit on my super-dooby earlier bro." apologized Mokap
"No problem, bro. We cool as frozen shit." said Meat.
And with that, they walked off into the sunset to see about making that movie, and getting a new crib.
Author's end note: So, there's the first chapter. Tell me if you thought it was funny or interesting, and feel free to dispense advice. I've got open ears.
This was mainly to establish character, there will be more jokes and stuff happening in the next one. And we'll meet our first OC. Be there!