AN: I don't own anything or anyone *sigh* Though I would give my soul for a moment with Damon. It should be illegal for anything so hot to not be bound in my bed! LOL hope you enjoy this song fic. I just couldn't get it out of my head.
"Behind Blue Eyes" by Limp Bizkit
No one knows what it's like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes
And no one did know him. Sure his brother thought he had the idea about what an evil monster he was. How easily, his brother thought, that taking a human life was for him. But in truth the switch was broken long ago. Now the murders where eating at his soul.
And no one knows
What it's like to be hated
To be fated to telling only lies
Telling lies was the easiest way to deal with the scar of Katharine. His heart had been torn into a million shards the day he learned that she was gone from his life. He searched for countless decades to find a way for him to free his love, only to be lead down dead ends. The search was hurting him more than he would ever admit. Lies are what kept him going and what kept him sane.
But my dreams they aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be
I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free
Then he saw her, in the flesh. Alive and well. Wait…Alive? No. Katharine was dead like him, but this girl, she was human flesh. His heart jumped. Yes his shattered and scarred heart felt something the first time he saw her. Elena. That is what his brother said her name was. Love began to fill his veins for the first time in too long. His dreams became all about her. Her eyes so full of hope and life, her flesh and blood scent that he could smell from miles away. At night he would sometimes just sit on her roof listening to the way she dreamed. He loved wondering if she dreamed of him.
No one knows what it's like
To feel these feelings
Like I do, and I blame you!
No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain and woe
Can show through
Even though he was in love with this new version of Katharine, he could not help but be taken back when the lies of Katharine came out. For so long he believed that he was the one that Katharine loved and wanted. He truly believed that. But when she told him to his face it was as though the rays of the sun had burned him. Still he had one more chance at love, so he did what he could and confronted the new love he felt. He had to know. And when she told him that it would always be his brother, varvain was placed in his heart. He snapped. Actually he snapped Jeremy's neck as she was watching. He wanted to show her his pain. He knew he was wrong the moment he saw her eyes. He knew that he was not good enough. But he resolved to never show her another sorrow such as that night's display of his anger. He blamed Katharine for his lack of self control. He should never have gone to Elena that night…
Discover l.i.m.p. say it [x4]
No one knows what it's like
To be mistreated, to be defeated
Behind blue eyes
No one knows how to say
That they're sorry and don't worry
I'm not telling lies
He and his brother saved her from death. It took him risking his life to show her that he loved her, and for one instant he thought it worked. He saw the light in her eyes as she showed herself on the staircase. He wanted to run to her. Until he saw that her eyes where shinning for his brother. He would gladly die for her, and yet she wanted another. Then something happened, she looked at him and sincerely thanked him for his help. He felt a peace he had not ever known. He went to her that night. Intending on being selfish, he waited for her to come out of the bathroom. But then he saw it in her eyes. This was no longer a competition between him and his brother, for his brother was better for her. And he loved her just enough to see that now. He saw that she was falling for him, and he could not hurt her anymore. He said what he needed to say, and make her forget. A single tear falling from behind blue eyes.
No one knows what it's like
To be the bad man, to be the sad man
Behind blue eyes.