Hearts as Cold as Stars
By: Mistress of Fandom
The battle raged around her. Her bow sang in her ear as Orc after Orc fell before her. This was what she did. She was captain of the guard. She fought for her King Thranduil, to protect him. She fought for her Prince Legolas, her friend. She fought for her family, friends, and those sworn to obey her commands. She fought for freedom and for the goodness that she knew was in the world around her. This was what she did.
"Mellon nin! Behind you!"
Tauriel ducked the axe that had been falling towards her. She kicked out and the Orc fell to its knees. She wasted no time in taking its head off its shoulders. Legolas beamed at her, glad that she had acted so quickly. She grabbed her blade from where it had fallen, and dashed back into the thickest of the fighting.
Here, in the thick of things, the world faded away. Dwarves, Elves, and Men fall all around her. She helped those she could, and ended the misery of those who no one can help. She moved quickly, never stopping too long in one place. Legolas stayed by her side, slaying any Orc she missed. Together they are an unstoppable team.
"Tauriel, you lead us into the thickest of the fighting?" Legolas called to her, as yet another Orc fell before his bow.
She nodded in the affirmative and he doesn't say anything else. He knew she had her reasons, and he would respect her choice. That was one of the things that she liked about the Prince. He followed his father's wisdom, but he was not blinded by his father's hatred. He would, however, try to dissuade her if he knew what she was looking for.
Because she was looking for something. Someone. A short someone with long brown-black hair, and soft brown eyes. A someone with a kind voice, and strong hands. A someone who played the strings of a harp as well as he played the string of his bow. A someone who she had given her heart to, despite the rivalry between their people. A someone who was a Dwarf.
Kíli, son of Dís.
The one who Tauriel had pledged herself to with a simple clasp of her hand. He probably didn't even realize.
"Do you think she could ever love me?"
"Yes." She whispered to herself, "always."
Tauriel ducked another blade, and stabbed out. The Orc cursed her in the black tongue. Legolas leaped over her head, and killed the Orc that had been rushing her. She kept moving.
Of course, to those around her, it looked like she was running head long into the thickest of the fighting. And she was. But she wasn't following the bloodshed, she was following her heart.
Deep inside of her, in a part of her heart she had never known was there, she could feel him. That thread, connecting her to him, filling her with joy, and fear, pulled her towards the worst of the fighting. Pulled her towards the gates of Erebor, and the company of Thorin Oakenshield.
"Tauriel! Pay attention. By Manwë, you seem to be eager to throw yourself onto an Orcish blade!"
"What was that, Legolas?" She grinned at him as she put an arrow in the Orc that had been behind him. "Something about paying attention?"
The Prince shook his head at her, as he knocked another arrow. They had done this so many times, but this was different. She didn't know why, but it was. He was half a step behind her, he hung back, he spoke to her as they fought. It wasn't normal. Usually they were in step, a well-oiled machine. Today, when they should be fighting perfectly, but they weren't. It was almost as if… as if he knew.
"Tauriel! What brings you here?"
"Someone has to keep you safe, Kíli." She whispered.
He looked up at her, and in that second, as she looked into his eyes, she sees understanding dawn on him. She smiled softly. The world around them faded. On a battle field, they were alone.
"You cannot be her." He said, mirroring his words from Laketown. "She is far away."
"I am right here." Tauriel said, smiling, "and I always will be."
"Kíli!" With one word, the spell was broken.
The Dwarf turned to face his brother, and a hand falls on her shoulder. Tauriel breathed in. There is no one around them. The fighting had ebbed, for now, and they are in the eye of the storm. A peace settled over them.
"Tauriel?" Legolas asked softly. "This is your choice?"
Tauriel looked at her friend, her Prince. Had it really been a choice? No. The moment she had lain eyes on Kíli, she knew. There had never been a choice. She just belonged with him. It had been meant to happen, she was sure of it.
"No." She sighed, struggling to find words, "no it wasn't a choice. It was fate. One day you might understand. One day I might understand."
"I thought…"
"Legolas there is no thought in this. It just is. I love him."
"You are happy with this? Tauriel, mellon nin, he is mortal."
Mortal. The word made her sick with fear. Legolas was right. Kíli was mortal, and in giving herself to him, in giving he love to him, she had cursed herself.
There were two ways to kill an Elf, two ways to kill the immortal Eldar. A blade could end her life in battle. She was not unharmed by the weapons of Man, or Dwarf, or Orc. But far crueler, and the true curse of the Eldar, was Love. Unlike the other races of Arda, an Elf could die from a broken heart. They love only once in their lifetime, they could only love once in their lifetime. This was why few Elves ever gave their heart to a mortal. When they did, there was little choice in the matter. Legolas knew this.
The moment she gave her heart to Kíli, she had doomed herself to die. She couldn't bring herself to care. She was happy. For the first time in years, she felt right. She loved Kíli, and nothing else mattered. She wanted to be by his side always, and if they could just finish this battle, she would have that. Kíli was mortal, and for him, she would be too. And dying to be with him? That couldn't possibly be as painful as living without him, even for a moment. Now that she had him, she wasn't going to let him go. Not again. Not like the day the Dwarves had escaped.
"I know. Legolas I know. Mellon nin, we have no time for this." She put her hand on his shoulder, "we will talk once this battle is finished."
She was right, of course, a second wave of Orcs was pouring down the mountainside. Legolas knocked his bow beside her, as did she. They released their taught bow strings simultaneously, and a third follows them to nest in the neck of an Orc. Kíli. Tauriel smiled as he and his kin step up to them. This love she felt for Kíli might just lead to something greater for the whole world. The rush of the battle roared through her veins, and her heart beat a heavy and steady rhythm. It beat for two. She fought with a smile on her face, because this is what she fought for.
She spun in a circle, her blade singing, and that's when she saw him. Thorin Oakenshield stood atop a small hill. Orcrist was raised and glowing an ethereal blue, and the Dwarvish King stood facing Bolg, the son of the Defiler. The whole world slowed as every army turned to watch the battle. The King ducked low to avoid a brutal cut at his head, but he left his side undefended. She could see it happen before it did. There was nothing anyone could do to stop it. Bolg took the chance that was offered him. The side swipe caught the King in his stomach. He fell. Tauriel looked to Kíli and Fíli. The brothers stood still, shock, horror, and grief etched across their features. They moved before she can grab them.
"Uncle!" Fíli cried.
"Thorin!" Kíli screamed.
She could feel it. She could feel his pain. It was a physical thing, searing into her heart. A pain that was his and only his. She didn't know Thorin, not like his nephews, and yet through the bond they shared, she mourned as keenly as any of Durin's folk. The brothers reach the Orc, and Tauriel jumped out of her trance. She moved as quickly as she could, blade cutting down any who got in her path. Fíli and Kíli fought side by side, and her heart ached to join them. They fought a beast three times their size. There was no way they could defeat it.
Kíli and his brother fought with a fierceness she had never seen. Fíli cut at Bolg's legs, but she had eyes only for his dark haired brother. That is until the pain clenching at her heart grew even stronger.
"Fíli! No!" The anguished cry silenced those fighting around the little hill. Tauriel's heart beat quickened, and the world stopped completely. She watched in horror as he lunged for Bolg.
Tauriel jumped forward, calling out with her heart. Kíli.
He lands a cut on the Orc's chest.
She leaped over a pile of fallen bodies, ad cut down the Orc that had been sneaking up behind Kíli. Meleth, my love.
He ducked another cut, tears streamed down his face.
Kíli please!
His blade plunged into Bolg's heart. He had done it. Tauriel felt tears of joy welling in her eyes. She suppressed a laugh. He had done it! Kíli turned to look at her, grief in his eyes, but also hope. He had done it! Neither one of them sees Bolg move. Neither one of them sees him pick up his sword. Both of them, however, feel it when the dying Orc drove it through Kíli's heart.
The Dwarf's eyes widened in shock.
"T-Tauriel." He fell forward into her arms.
"Kíli. Kíli, please. Just hold on. Breath."
"So far away."
"No. I'm here. With you."
"Could you have loved me?"
"I do. I love you, Kíli. That's why you have to hold on. We have so much we need to do. So many stories you've yet to tell me."
Her voice shook with desperation. She had just found him. She couldn't lose him! But as she looked down at the gaping wound in his chest, she knew she already had. There was no one in all the world who could heal that. Her heart stuttered, desperately trying to beat for him, trying to save him despite the odds.
"You're right. I will. I promise. Under the stars."
"Yes." She smiled down at him, tears of a different kind filling her eyes.
He lifted his hand slowly, caressing her cheek. She grabbed his other hand, and he pushed something into her grasp. She felt the heavy warmth of the rune stone in her fingers.
"I promised."
Her heart seized in her chest, at the same moment his stopped beating. She had never known how weak her hold on life had been. But in that second, as it slipped away, she saw. She was connected to the world by one thing, and one thing only. Kíli. The moment she had bound herself to him, he became the only thing keeping her alive.
It took her all of a second to figure it out. All of a second, before her heart shattered in her chest. A pain, the likes of which she had never known, seared through her. Fire burned in her lungs, and poured through her very soul. And only then did the dam burst. She threw her head back, and screamed.
A scream ripped across the battle field. A heart wrenching, anguished cry of denial. Every face turned towards the knoll in front of the entrance. Orc, Man, Dwarf, and Elf. Four armies watched the woman screaming out her pain. Four armies looked up, and one said a prayer.
The Elves knew. Of course the Elves knew. They had all heard it before, or heard of it. They knew what that anguished scream meant. They feared it. It sent thoughts flying back to home, and hearth, and lovers. In the middle of it all, still fighting, was Legolas, and the forest guard. They fought towards the hill, to reach Tauriel. They stopped only when they knew it was too late.
With a gurgle and a whimper, the screams stopped.
"Tauriel." Legolas whispered. "Mellon nin." My friend.
The Captain of the Woodland Guard lay draped over the Dwarf she had given her heart to. Her red hair was matted with sweat and blood. Trails of tears were drying down her cheeks. But despite the horror surrounding them, the two looked peaceful. Like they had simply lain down to rest, and would wake at any moment. Legolas knew they wouldn't. He placed his fingers on her forehead gently before sliding them down to shut her glassy emerald eyes.
"Námo keep you, Tauriel." He sighed over his oldest friend. "Dance among the stars, and forget the pain that tore you from this life."
Legolas stood, and turned his eyes skyward. He held back his tears, and motioned for the guards to collect the bodies, Dwarves and Elves alike. As the bodies were carried away, through the thickest of the fighting, a giant eagle came over the horizon. Hope blossomed in the hearts of everyone on the battle field. Everyone except an Elvish prince who stood alone, face turned to the sky, his heart as cold and distant as the stars she had loved so much.