"Ninako! Kinoshita Ninako!"
A guy called out to me in front of the train station. He was my ex, Ichinose Ren.
Oh come on. He's from the past, my past that I've so long ago buried with all the memories and feelings I had from that time. Moving on was hard. It was hard forgetting someone whose face is painted at the back of your eyes, whose voice is recorded in your mind and whose heartbeat synchronised with yours for some time. Looking back now would mean wasting all my effort to get a move on with my life. I don't want to see him, not even a glimpse of him.
And calling my name out here? Is he out of his mind? This is where I first confessed to him. That was way back then but that quite caused a scene. Who knows if they've forgotten about it? And the thing about it is that he rejected me back then. I was rejected. By him. At this very place. It was also around this time, too. What's he trying to pull? Is he making fun of me? Of my memory? This hurts.
As I heard footsteps racing towards me, I instinctively walked faster too. My feet raced past each other as if trying to outrun each other. As soon as I was about to turn a corner, someone grabbed my arm and halted me.
Thinking it was him, I fought hard not to look up. I don't want to see his face. It'll be much worse than looking back to him earlier.
'Hey let's talk.'
His voice confirmed my darkest fears. I was right. It's him. It's really him. Should I respond? Or should I not? What should I do? Argh! Why did he have to come back at a time like this! Just when, I've made up my mind to forget about him! He really doesn't know how to put himself in the right timing.
'Leave me alone.'
'No. I won't. Let's talk.'
I didn't respond. I felt my heart still skipped a beat the second time I heard his voice. And that is certainly not a good sign. Answering him would bring it all back, even my unwanted feelings.
'Hey. Why don't you answer?'
'U-uhmm...' my voice cracked as I spoke, it was as though it was helping my mind tell my heart that it shouldn't respond to his actions.
'H-hi.' it was all I can say. It's amazing how I can be so sure that it's him I'm talking to without looking up let alone looking at him.
'Look, let's talk properly. We have so much to talk about.'
'I'm sorry. I have somewhere else to go...'
'Why are you avoiding me? Let's talk. Let's fix this. Let's fix our relationship...'
With those words he uttered, I felt my face lose blood.
'WHAT DO YOU KNOW? WHAT ARE WE GOING TO FIX? RELATIONSHIP? WHAT RELATIONSHIP? HUH?'
I don't know how I should react to what he just said. Part of me wants to jump for joy to think that he still cares about me but another part wants me to kill him for exactly the same reason.
''Know what? I've already started moving on. You're too late.'
With those words said and done, I tried to walk away. I took a step and moved away from him. It may be the most coward thing to do but I just want to go away right now. It's like my greatest fear is his coming back.
'It's never too late.'
His voice cracked with every word. It was as if he's trying to fight back some tears that were starting to flow. Come on! You're a guy. You'd never cry. At least not in front of a girl or in the public.
I turned, this time, to look at him. He held his head down as if asking for forgiveness.
At this, the worst possible thing happened. At least, for me, it is.
My heart skipped a beat.
No. This shouldn't happen. I've already moved on, right? I mean, I've already started moving on. What's happening? This isn't right. No. It definitely isn't right.
I tried to take a few steps away but he looked up. And as I tried to turn my heart into a stone, I saw his eyes that were full of tears waiting to drip down.
I was lost for words. I don't know what to say. And looking into his eyes made me see deeper into him. Like how he really wants us to get back, how he really wants to fix our relationship and how he wants to own me again. His sorry was sincere, I guess.
My feet unconsciously moved. It was moving on its own, towards him. Without knowing, I was already near him. And my arms were already tying themselves around him.
'Is this a yes?'
He asked me with hope in his voice. He looked up to me, still with those teary eyes.
I didn't answer. Or rather, I didn't know what to answer. My brave face until now was just a show. My heart melted as our eyes met, as his voice reached my ears and as, once again, I felt his touch.
'I'm gonna hug you back. If you don't want it, then you can push me away.'
With that said, he hugged me. It was a warm hug. Even warmer than the hugs that we have exchanged back when we were still together.
'I missed these.'
These words escaped my lips as if on cue. I guess cannot contain myself anymore. I hugged him tighter.
My feelings that I kept bottled up for so long were released. I have waited for this moment for so long and, now that is has come, I can't help but feel happy.
'So are we back to the way we used to be?' he asked me, this time with joy.
'Uhmm...'
'Hey! You just hugged me!'
'Haha! Just kidding! No. We're not back just yet. You have to court me again.'
'I'll go any lengths to be with you again. I don't care if it takes a whole lifetime or forever if that's what it needs. I'll do anything to be with you again.'
And with that, our lips touched each other. It was as if we were the only ones around. I admit that quite caused another scene. Ok. Another memory in front of the train station. At least, that really embarrassing moment would be replaced by this good one.
A/N: I made this during a blackout and it was really hard because I was trying to conserve my tab's battery. Pardon me if there is anything wrong here. Feel free to leave a comment. :)
