Fandom : Supernatural

Disclaimer : I own nothing of this except the narration. The characters and their universe all belong to their righteous owners. Please don't sue me.

Rating : M for a reason !

Blahblah: I wrote this to try and overcome a writer's block, there's no real plot, just went with the flow. Sort of a PWP and sort of not…

Set in the 10th season so there might be some spoilers if you haven't watched it / ! \ . Castiel also has his OWN grace back.

Also, the person in charge of proof reading my stories is currently unavailable, so any mistakes will be his fault anyway –happily throwing him under the bus-. On with it!

Warning : Language and sex scene between two males / ! \ If you are not at ease with this kind of thing, do not read.

A night in his life

Knocking back the whiskey shot, the man waved his hand at the waitress to get a refill. These last few days… had been hard. Hard on him, hard on Sammy, hard on… Hell, let's just say hard on anybody he happened to be near to. He sighed. Demon Dean had been a royal pain in the neck to deal with for everyone. Even Crowley ended up bitten in the ass.

Taking on the mark had been necessary, yet nothing but a rubbish idea. Killing off Abaddon had just been the first step of a downward spiral, fucking him up more and more. Not that he needed help on the subject, mind you. He had been quite successful at fucking himself up without anyone's help this last decade.

Getting killed by that dick Scribe of God fucking Metatron had just been the cherry on top of his wasted life. Dean snorted. Next time he gets to talk to that son of a bitch, he'll be sure to get him back for this. Dying let loose the demon he usually held on a tight leash.

The Mark was acting up, he could feel it, his arm throbbing. The bloodlust had him all wound up. He needed to pick a fight with someone to calm his restlessness. Throwing some cash on the counter, he set off to a back alley where he knew he'd find trouble.

Staggering to his car, Dean Winchester held his left side ribs with a hand. Nothing really, no blood was spilt –not his own at least- except a cut on his lip. Just bruises. He tried taking a deep breath and hissed as a flashing white light made him close his eyes. Okay, so maybe he also had a broken bone or two. Nothing he couldn't handle. Grunting, he propped himself against Baby, searching his pockets for the keys. His fingers felt numb with the pain. The skin was badly damaged and it ached to grab the cold metal. Just… Get it done and over with.

'Dean.'

Well, crap.

'Hey Cas.' His voice was raspy from the exhaustion.

'Dean… What have you done?' When no answer came back the black haired man decided to continue. 'Sam called me. He couldn't reach you on your phone and was worried about you. Where were you?'

Sam. Of course, Sam. Anger flared through him once more. He was not a baby anymore. He did not need anyone to keep that close an eye on what he was doing. Whatever shit he was in or up to, he most certainly didn't need someone to watch over his back.

'I can take care of myself. I am the big brother out of us both.' Dean sneered. He needed to catch his breath as talking put much more pressure on his bruises than just breathing and walking. Well, more like hobbling, advancing one leg at a time.

'Well, maybe you should start acting like it.' Cas observed, narrowing his eyes on the man holding his side. 'Let me get you back to the bunker and heal you.'

The angel stepped forward and grabbed Dean by his shoulder.

'Don't fucking touch me, Cas!' Stepping out his reach, Dean stumbled against his bed and fell on it. He hadn't been fast enough to shrug the man off him and they were already back in his room. As his back made contact with his bed covers, Dean huffed. The shock knocked the air out of his lungs as the pain shot through him. Damn broken rib. And damn him for taking on a group a lousy jerks by himself, even if that was what he had wanted all along.

'Stay here.' Commanded the man. 'I'll tell Sam I found you, and get your car back. After this, I'll heal you and I expect you to bloody be right where I am leaving you.'

Dean blinked. Did Cas just threatened him? Did he just- What? What now? Cas was angry at him or something? He was a grown up man for fuck sake! Peachy. Just… Peachy.

Dean sat up on his bed, bending his unwilling body hurt like hell but he would be damned if he'd be caught laying there, quietly waiting for the angel to be back. He was a Winchester, he did not have to listen to anyone. Hearing the soft rustle of wings, he knew he wasn't alone anymore.

'I half expected my brother to barge in here as soon as you told him, you hauled my ass back.' He winced slightly as new flashes of pain went through his body.

'I told him you needed rest.'

Dean snickered but soon stopped as he felt hands on his bruised body. Sitting next to him was Cas, slowly healing him. 'Don't! Get off me, Cas!' He tried to fight off the man, however his ribs were already healed up before he could shove off the angel.

'Why don't you want me to help you?'

Because, I'm a wreck. Because I don't deserve it. I don't deserve much, to be honest. Because I'm fucking broken and useless. I bring so much pain to people I care about. I should have never brought Sammy back into this life. He had a life all laid out before him. Now, it's all we can do to keep one another from dying for the other or the bloody greater good. Damn it all.

If he was still alive when God returned, then he'll kick his immaterial ass into the next week for wrecking up his family. His parents were dead, Sam was all he had left and yet he wanted nothing more than to tell him to just leave him be. Oh what he'd give to get Sam's innocence back and let him have a nice life, away from those responsibilities dropped on their shoulders by some fucked up destiny crap.

This, he thought, this bullshit got the best of me. I am already broken and went to hell and back for it. Quite literally at that. I don't want my brother to witness this anymore.

Castiel was tired of Dean not answering his questions and avoiding him the last couple of weeks. He was seriously ticked off by the man that sat near him. Deciding that enough was enough, he forced him to look him in the eyes and wandered in Dean's mind. He caught the hurt, the sadness and the exhaustion of the man.

'You are not broken, Dean.' He whispered and caught him snorting at that statement. 'You are not! You just need to get rid of the mark of Cain ! It is pulling you down. You need to resist it, Dean!'

'And what if I do not want to resist it anymore, huh? Have you thought of it, Cas?! What if I am tired of fighting for nothing ? For all I care, I am two steps away from asking you to smite me already and end my misery!' Because I do not have the fucking will to do it myself. He added silently.

Oh, how could such a good man be subjected to so much self-hatred? Despite every good deed he had done, despite every person he had saved over the years… Was it not enough for him? Did the man seriously thought he brought more misfortune on his loved ones than care and affection? Castiel then acted on an impulse and kissed the man's lips. He needed to show him he mattered to someone, someone who wouldn't let him give up on himself. Dean Winchester mattered to so many people but he was too caught up in self pity to notice it.

The kiss had been soft at the beginning but slowly deepened as tongues were involved. Castiel effectively shut up the hunter and threw out the proverbial window any self deprecating thought he was about to utter. Raking his hands on his body, he found a nipple he could twist and slightly pinch with his right hand, feeling the flesh harden under his fingers, making Dean whimper and break the kiss to catch his breath. Castiel decided he wouldn't let him stop his ministrations and went on kissing his jaw and his neck all the while grazing his nails along the left ribs that had been in such bad state earlier that night.

'Cas…'

Moving on top of him, Castiel placed one of his leg between the hunter's thighs, pressing on his groin. A harsh moan escaped Dean's lips. Castiel could feel his vessel's blood pooling in his lower belly already. Surely his black slacks weren't all that concealing as he soon felt a hand rubbing him through his clothes. Dean had finally choosen to partake in this feast after feeling something hard poking at his thigh. He went back to nip and lick at his pink lips already reddened by the rough kiss. He needed more friction. He pinned Dean's hips to the bed and ground himself onto him drawing groans out the back of the hunter's throat. He liked that sound. They'd need to talk about this later on, but for now they just enjoyed each other's warmth and went on with what felt like heaven. Grinding hard on the human felt good.

'Clothes… Too many clothes, Cas.'

Dean gasped when Castiel opened his jeans and yanked them down, the fresh air of his room making contact with his hot flesh. Castiel got up and quickly rid himself of his clothes while Dean took his shirt off himself. Crawling back up on top of him, Castiel kissed Dean hungrily and started stroking their cocks in his hand. Some precome had already begun to trickle down their length. At this point, they couldn't tell whose it was as he smeared it over their straining lengths, pressing his thumb on Dean's slit. This sprung the man to add his hand to the messy fumbling, quickening the pace. Moans and throaty groans were the only sounds and Castiel revelled in the shameless and sinful mewling and raspy sounds Dean was making. If revealing his feelings for the hunter helped him get back on track and try harder to live on, then to hell with the consequences.

Dean started to rut into their joined hands, loosing himself in pleasure. The strokes were faster and messier. They did not even go over their full lengths anymore, this was about finding release and Dean could feel his balls drawing up. A couple more thrusts in his their hands had him tipping over the edge and coming with somewhat animalistic grunts. Castiel milked him through his orgasm, as his hit him too shortly after, shooting his semen on them both. Ragged breaths filled the room as Castiel made a last effort not to fall on Dean, but rather on his left as the arm he used to prop himself up wasn't enough anymore to keep him off the hunter's body. He collapsed near the human who was slowly coming down from his high.

'You know I will need part two of this in the morning, don't you?' Dean voice was panting and through his cheeky question, Castiel heard his insecurity that this had been merely a way to stop him from his destructive behaviour and dark train of thought.

'There'll even be part three, four and five and how many more you could ever desire from now on. I am not going anywhere.'

Dean just turned to put an arm around Castiel, not paying any attention to how messy and sticky they were, their come could dry off for all he cared. He just wanted to hurry up and sleep off this stupid chick flick moment he just had with the other man.

That's it, folks! Hadn't written any smut in a while, I do hope you liked it. Was it nice, was it not? Leave a review and let me know! x