Author's Note: So... I've fallen in love with this game. Even though only Episode One has been released, I find it better than any the TellTale games I've played. The plot has an abundance of potential and the indie soundtrack is superb. But the characters... I'm completely enamored with. Dontnod have done a fantastic job and if you haven't tried it, I highly recommend it. Big thanks to BlackAssassiN999 from Deviantart for allowing me to use her lovely portrait of Max!
Blue meets Green
"Photography is a way of feeling, of touching, of loving. What you have caught on film is captured forever... it remembers little things, long after you have forgotten everything." - Aaron Siskind
Tears. Droplets, falling to the floor. A moment of sadness, maybe even relief. I haven't cried since I left you; it's only fitting that I cry when I return to you.
Five fucking years.
It hurts, you holding me like this. What did I do to deserve this kindness? I would be furious with myself right now. You don't say a word letting me cry into your shirt. I cling onto you for dear life. I can't leave you ever again. You're the only one who truly understands me.
You pull away just a bit, lifting my chin; my eyes meeting yours. You've never given me this look before, soft yet quite sad… and something else? You've changed a lot, you know that? Or maybe you haven't at all…
It's been that kind of day.
It's been a long day to say the least; I'm still not sure if it's actually real or not… or rather, I just can't believe it. The universe giving me, dorky Maxine Caulfield, the omnipotent power to control time? Ugh. Way to heap upon a mountain of responsibility onto me in an instant. And the biggest thing I can't actually believe? Being here… with you.
We're hugging. We're crying.
It's bizarre to be here with you right now. Two months ago I was still in Seattle, escaping Arcadia Bay to follow my dreams… and in the process, running from you.
I wish you came with us. These five years haven't been the same without you.
You're so much taller now; I know you've always been taller than me but I still can't help but feel small in your company sometimes.
Darling, I love what you've done to your hair, it suits you perfectly. An electric blue that compliments that fiery, rebellious attitude you've always had. I don't think I've changed at all. I'm still that short, dorky shy kid from five years ago.
I know you're still upset with me, who wouldn't be? I see your body language, facing away from me, tensing up whenever we talk. Not wanting to let me in. I don't blame you. I don't think I would let myself in either. It's difficult letting people in, especially a friend that vanishes from you. Can you ever trust me again?
But I know you're happy to see me again, I can see it in your eyes. I'm over the moon to see you again, Chloe.
Sitting on this bench near the lighthouse, overlooking Arcadia Bay, I'm thinking to myself about how you could possibly believe me. Maybe you don't believe me…I don't even think I believe myself at this point. Can you actually trust someone that you haven't seen or spoken to in five years? How can you be so forgiving? I just told you I can rewind time, and you believe me? Just like that? You're far too kind.
I missed you Chloe. I missed you so fucking much. I...
We look over Arcadia Bay, relishing in the warm heat the sun manages to provide, ignoring the chilly autumn air, watching as the last of the few flurries make their way down.
There is something special about sunsets such as this; how beautiful hues of orange and pink can paint a picture before your very eyes. I find them to be quite romantic to be honest. Sigh.
It feels nostalgic being back here with you. We used to come here all the time when we were kids with Joyce, William and Bongo. I miss them.
Time slowly passes us by as we stare out over the bay. What are you thinking about Chloe?
Are you thinking about me? Are you thinking about why I left? About why I'm back? Maybe you're just appreciating the sunset as well, I know you love them. I shyly glance over to where you're sitting, a stressed look on your face. You don't smile much these days do you? I saw the antidepressants at your house…
Was that how it was when I left? Is this how it's going to be from now on?
I wonder if you will ever enjoy spending time in my company anymore. Would you ever just cast aside your former best friend and leave me for the wolves?
I've had nightmares where you have. Nights in which I wake up in a feverish sweat, wishing it weren't true. Needless to say, my sleeping habits haven't been great recently.
Sometimes I scare myself into thinking you will and I always try to mentally brace myself for it; but I know you won't. I know you too well. I grew up with you after all.
I like to think that deep down, I'm still your best friend; the one person whom you could give your heart to, knowing that it would be kept safe. The person that you could trust your life and all its secrets with… Like I still do with you…
But I understand if I'm not that person anymore… And in some kind of sick, cruel, understanding way, I don't blame you. To leave at the time that I did, it's… betrayal; sacrilege.
Maybe we two are broken – shattered, even – ghosts of our former selves. I wouldn't find it hard to believe. Five years of nightmares can effortlessly break you.
Maybe that's why we're both here together now. Two shattered girls, looking to take on the future; searching for their place in this world… Maybe we can make each other whole again. Maybe.
I hope.
Where is the life that I recognize?
Sigh.
"Want me to take you back to your dorm room Max?" you say, breaking me out of my reverie. I can't help but silently nod.
Before walking down to where your truck was parked, I glance over Arcadia Bay once more, both enjoying and dreading the fact I was back in my home town.
I was home.
Departing from the lighthouse and entering the city, I blankly stare the out the window, taking in the start of autumn, my favorite time of year. I just love how it's not particularly cold and how the changing of the leaves signify the start of something new and different.
Maybe just like us…
As we enter Arcadia Bay, a blast of nostalgia hits me right in the face. The town hasn't really changed much at all. The rather small size of the town is still that; the same few docks still line the bay.
Maybe nostalgia isn't the right word for it; wistfulness is more like it.
I did miss home. I missed you.
We zoom down the streets and avenues in a flash. You're a pretty reckless driver you know that Chloe? I try to enjoy the autumn season, looking out the passenger side window at all the changing colors of the leaves on the trees that line the streets; vivid yellows, bright oranges and mild browns paint the trees in a wonderful mosaic melody.
Your aims to break my neck, however, as we, - skillfully - I might add, weave in and out of different lanes of traffic on the way back to my dorm didn't go unnoticed. What's the rush? Did you become a professional driver while I was gone?
We pull into the near empty school parking lot and park without a single word uttered between us on the whole entire journey here. Silence. We exit the truck; I glance over and see that a few students still lingering about, perhaps finishing up a night class or were on their way to a club meeting. I don't care.
With dusk quickly turning into night, an eerie calm had settled around the campus; a slight October breeze makes itself present. Shivering as we make our way from the parking lot into main courtyard side by side, I study the campus grounds a little more. The campus looks pretty in the dying sunlight, casting a pink and orange gradient over the grounds, garnishing the trees and the main building in a tranquil image.
Another chill runs down my spine. The evenings are starting to get cold.
Suddenly, I feel a contact between us. Did you just pull me closer to drape your arm around my shoulders?
"Don't worry Max, I got your back. No one will hurt you while I'm around..." was all you said in a slightly irate voice. I know you're looking out for that psychopath Nathan.
Genuinely, I can't help but blush. It's nice to know that after all these years, your best friend actually still cares about you… cares about me.
You're my bodyguard… "I believe in you…"
"Thanks…" I can't help but softly whisper.
My heart flutters at the contact; your touch setting my skin on fire. With butterflies now inhibiting my stomach, I did all I could think of – pull you closer, making sure you don't leave.
I glance up to see – even if you deny it, I definitely saw it Chloe Price, - a small smile grace your lips, even if it was just for a second. There you are. I softly smile to myself. Progress.
We walk across the main campus; it was like poetry in motion. Together, we are bathed in the fading sunlight as we make our way across campus, a couple snuggling together - something out of a romance novel. I don't mind.
Making our way through the campus to my dorm room in a comfortable pace, we are silently enjoying each other's company. Well at least I am.
It's nice to hold onto someone you deeply care about, no matter for how long you've been gone.
Walking in the building, the stillness in the girl's hall was unnerving to say the least. Where was everyone? Probably at some Vortex Club meeting… We stroll down the hall undisturbed.
"Here we are, Room 219, the Caulfield residence." I murmur.
Unlocking the door, you casually walk in taking your arm from my shoulders, flicking the switch to turn on the ceiling light in my room before plopping down on the couch with a thud.
"Do you mind if I crash here for the night Max? I can't stand to be in the same building as my step-douche anymore. Asshole." you ask.
"Oh uh yeah sure… No problem." It wasn't a big deal to be honest. After today, I wouldn't want to be near him either. Who would?
I softly close the door behind us, taking a glance as you lay your head back, close your eyes and breathe. Oh… you're so beautiful Chloe… you're still as gorgeous as ever.
"What did you say Max?"
That did NOT just happen. Did… Did I really just say all of that out loud?
"Oh what? I didn't say anything! Make yourself at home Chloe!" I hastily replied, slightly blushing. Whew. Dodged a bullet there Max. Idiot.
"What's this? "The October Country" by Ray Bradbury. Huh I think I read this before." you say, picking up the book.
"Really?" I say surprised. Chloe's not one to read…
"Yeah isn't about those ninja pirates..? …Never mind."
I giggle. Hard. You haven't really changed at all. Always the comedian. God I missed you.
I casually put my bag down finally taking this opportunity to lie down on my bed letting you peruse through my stuff.
Finally a brief respite.
Words cannot even begin to express how tired I am after such an emotional day. I hear you across the room sighing. I can't even imagine how you're feeling Chloe.
Seeing someone you haven't spoken to in five years… I can't appreciate how you must really feel. Does your heart wrench in pain like it does for me? Or do you silently curse me, wishing that I had never returned?
I don't – can't - dwell on it.
You died today. That scares me to no end.
I don't think five years away from you can't even compare to what could have occurred today. Five years away is a blessing. I don't know what I would do to myself if I lost you. I'm here for you now... and forever.
I continue lie down, listening to you getting up and opening all my drawers and even going on to my laptop to check out my Facebook. And you thought I was nosy.
After such an exhausting, stressful and strange day, I couldn't be bothered to protest. A comfortable silence drapes over us.
I don't know how I could possibly finish all my homework for tomorrow… and to be honest I don't want to care right now. Ugh. There goes a few points off my GPA… Mom and Dad would be so proud.
You continue to tear down my room. What are you looking for Chloe?
I'm so tired… I just want to go to sleep.
"Nice place you got here Max. Love the wall of polaroids." You say with a twinge of annoyance and… disappointment present in your voice...
"Thanks Chloe. It's my little memorial wall." I say without thinking.
"Memorial wall huh? And not a single picture of me?"
Silence.
My eyes snap open and I swiftly stand up, slightly dizzying myself. I look you right in the eye, a look of sadness quickly turning itself into fury. If looks could kill…
"Chloe I..." I say trying to think of a reason. Nothing. How can I defend myself?
"What Max? What? Too ashamed to even have a picture of me in your "memorial"?" No. Never.
"Am I not good enough for you Maxine Caulfield? Didn't you even miss me just once?" The flood gates have been broken. A lone tear makes its way down your face. Everyday…
"You left me alone FIVE FUCKING YEARS AGO, ME, YOUR BEST FRIEND MAX! AND YOU CAN'T EVEN PUT UP A PICTURE OF YOUR BEST FRIEND TO REMEMBER ME BY? I FUCKING MISSED YOU SO MUCH MAX…" Your voice starts to trail off. I…I can't take it. It hurts. I hurt her bad.
"Who are these people? Your new Seattle buddies right? Did you really want to get away from me that badly? You would rather be with them than me Max? Huh Max? Say something!" Chloe… Please stop.
"I was in SO MUCH PAIN MAX! AND YOU JUST GOT UP AND LEFT ME! I NEEDED YOU MAX, I FUCKING NEEDED YOU!" Tears start to escape from your eyes. What have I done? I'm going to cry.
"DID YOU WANT TO FORGET ABOUT ME?"
A single sob escapes from my body. Then another. A whimper. My heart breaks a little. I could – would - never forget about you Chloe.
I bow my head, slowly making my way over to my drawer next to bed. You glare at me in silence. I don't deserve you. I don't think I ever will.
I sigh, pulling out one of the single most important possessions I have. I'm so sorry. I don't know if I can make this right.
Max and Chloe… Best Friends Forever… I quietly hand you the photo us, a few sobs escape me, causing my body to tremble.
"I… I would never ever forget about you Chloe… You're my best friend forever." I manage to say between sobs. I probably look so pathetic.
I have to keep on going… I have to make this right. I just have to.
"You might not believe me Chloe, but I regret leaving you behind, I really do. I can't even begin to express how much I missed you." I sniffle, on the verge of full out crying. Why did I leave you?
"I know I fucked up badly by leaving you in the position you were in and I'm sorry! I know I never even kept in touch; I know I never texted you or called you or anything! I know I fucked up! I'm sorry… I'm so fucking sorry… I don't deserve you…" I kneel on the floor, my legs giving out from underneath me. I can't look you in the eye anymore. I can't, I just can't.
Broken. Shattered. I've lost so much. We've lost it all.
Call my name. Make me whole. Please love.
Tears. Droplets, falling to the floor. A moment of sadness, maybe even relief. I haven't cried since I left you; it's only fitting that I cry when I return to you.
Five fucking years.
I can't take it.
"Chloe… I-"
And in an instant you wrap your arms around me, tossing the picture aside. I enthusiastically return the hug. How..?
It hurts, you holding me like this. What did I do to deserve this kindness? I would be furious with myself right now. You don't say a word letting me cry into your shirt. I cling onto you for dear life.
"Ho- how can you forgive me so easily!? I… I abandoned you Chloe!" I cry.
I can't leave you ever again…
"Shh… It's okay Max. It's okay..." You whisper. "I could never stay mad at you, you're my best friend Max. I can't stand to see you cry. You saved my life… and you're here now. That's what matters…"
"I'm so sorry Chloe… I'm so sorry…" I sob loudly.
"I know you are Max, I know you are."
…You're the only one who truly understands me.
We hold each a little while longer as you whisper sweet nothings into my ear, the soft sobs of our crying permeating the room. I'm sorry Chloe… you live in a daydream… where I don't belong.
You pull away just a bit, lifting my chin; blue meeting green. You've never given me this look before, soft yet quite sad… and something else? You haven't changed at all.
I'll give it all to you.
I can't help but stare at your eyes. I've always loved your eye color… A green with a hint of blue. Something quick flashes in your eye before it disappears. What are you thinking Chloe?
Before I have a chance to say anything, your lips find their way onto mine.
Nothing left to lose, loving you again.
My eyes widen in surprise, but quickly snap shut. I swear I could fly. Bliss. Pure bliss.
It's been a long day to say the least; and now I'm really unsure if this is actually real or not… I just can't believe it.
We're hugging. We're kissing…
Your hand finds its way to my cheek, softly caressing away any tears, leaving a burning sensation on my skin.
Moments later, we pull away for a breath of air; you laying your forehead on mine.
"I missed you Max…" you softly whisper, a few tears escaping from your eyes.
I don't know how to respond. So much has happened in such a short amount of time… but I can feel the weight of the world being lifted off of my shoulders.
Nothing can describe this moment. Just when I thought I had reached the lowest point I could ever achieve in my life… it was quickly erased by a dream come true.
Feeling a little brave, I pull you in for another kiss, reaching up to your cheek wiping away a stray tear.
Your soft lips caress mine, a contact so minute yet so powerful. Our lips dance in harmony.
Dancing. We're dancing.
I can't help but moan at the sensation, my mind going numb from the touch.
A moment later, we both pull away gasping for air. I blush heavily as we both smile at one another.
"I missed you Chloe…"I mumble.
Never has a moment in my life been so flawless. So… picture-perfect.
Time seemed to stand still in this instant, allowing me to gather my thoughts. How are you so forgiving Chloe Price? How are you only a year older than me? You're so mature, to even allow me to be in your presence… it's powerful. I don't think I'm as strong as you. I run away from my problems… you stay to fight yours, and you're better for it.
…And now this? Showering me in undeserved love and affection? You're such a sweetheart deep down... I don't deserve you…
I can't help but pull you closer on instinct, making sure this isn't a dream. I don't want to let go. I need you beside me, always. Forever, you are in my heart…
"So I'm beautiful and gorgeous huh Max?" you murmur, breaking the hush stillness between us.
"Oh… you heard that huh?" I blush. How embarrassing.
"I think the whole campus heard you Max." you giggle.
I groan at my little slip up. Ugh. At least she doesn't hate me for it… Quite the opposite actually.
"Cheer up Max, you're quite stunning yourself." I flush at the sincere compliment. You really are still sweet whenever you want to be I see.
Still feeling brave, I take your hand in mine, leading you to the little couch against the wall. As we sit, I wrap my arm around you, laying my head against your shoulder, quietly staring at my memorial wall.
You bend down to pick up the discarded photo of us before draping your arm around my shoulder.
"I remember this. The last Halloween we had together. We decided to be pirates for Halloween that year. You had the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen, you still do… Even with that eye patch on." you snicker.
Flushing at the cheesiness of the compliment, I say in the best pirate accent I could muster "You're quite charming as well sweetheart." God I'm such a geek.
"You're such a dork Max." You play fully swat at me. Are we actually… flirting? Not that I mind at all…
We sit there in peace for who knows how long. I'm quite happy to let this silence drag on. What happens now? Are we actually… dating? Are we… going steady? God I hope so…
A thought enters my mind. And I don't care if its cliché. I wonder if Chloe would mind…
I hastily stand up, startling you.
"What's wrong Max?" you curiously ask as I make my way to my bag to grab my camera.
"Nothing," I reply, sitting back down next to you on the couch.
"Say Cheese!" I yell, holding the camera out in front of us. I lean over to give you a quick peck on the lips, prompting you to do the same.
Flash.
I quickly take the film out, letting it develop before quickly planting another quick kiss on your cheek.
We haven't even been out on a date yet and I'm already acting like we're on our honeymoon. I guess that's what five years apart does to you; it turns you into a broken, hopeless romantic.
"Here Chloe. For you." I giggle, handing you the picture us kissing.
"You're such a cutie Max, thank you." You laugh.
"Now you can't say that I don't care about you..." I reply with a sad smile. I truly don't deserve this – deserve you.
What you have caught on film is captured forever.
"I'm sorry I doubted you Max, I know you care about me. But I just missed you so much… so so much…" you trail off, bringing me closer to you.
I appreciatively return the gesture, laying my head on your shoulder. You give me a slight kiss on the forehead. A wistful moment captures the two of us, leaving us to sit in a happy silence for a while.
After all these years, you haven't changed a bit. You may still have that tough girl exterior, but I know how sweet you really are… especially to me. I cuddle into you a bit tighter.
Time is soon lost upon me. How long have we been sitting here? I'm so tired. As soon as I think I'm about to fall asleep, I'm suddenly snapped out of my drowsiness by a loud snort. Is Chloe… are you?
Another loud splutter.
Yup… You're asleep alright. You've had a long day, probably longer than mine, if that's even possible. You look so serene, like an angel. My angel.
You are my sunlight; a fairy tale meant for me.
I slowly displace your arm from around my shoulder to slowly stand up and grab a blanket from the closet. I quickly snap the lights off, moonlight seeping through my two windows.
"Goodnight Chloe." I say as I softly place a kiss against your forehead, wrapping the blanket around us as I take my place next to you, snuggling into your side.
Today was so strange… I'm scared about the future. But right now I don't care. Wherever I – we – end up. I know we can take it on together. Maybe we really can make each other whole again. Maybe we already have.