Welcome to my seriously random, multiple-crossover fanfic!Prepare to be dazzled with complete randomness conjured up by my deranged mind and super-duper not-quite ninja keyboard!
-ahem-
Read on (if you dare), and please, beware of a few mini-minor spoilers from books further on in the HIVE series (there is nothing to drastic in this chapter).
Otto: [Stares around blank room]Why am I here?
Disembodies Voice: Because yooooooouuuuu have been chhhooooossseennnnn!
Otto: [girly scream and hides under a random chair]A ghost!
Disembodies Voice: MWAHAHAHAHA!
Otto: Is this the afterlife?
Disembodies Voice (We'll just call it DV for now): Ye...ur...noooooo.
Otto: 'Kay [stands up with chair stuck to back] Where are you?
DV: Everywhere! I know everything and I control all that happens to you...
Otto: Riiiight.
DV: [evil laugh]
[Silence]
Otto: So urm...ghosty person, what do I need to do?
[Silence]
DV: Urm...I dunno.
Otto: [headpalm]
DV: Ho hum.
Otto: Eh?
DV: No...ho hum.
Otto: [eyeroll] So how long am I gonna be here? I mean it's starting to get boring with just you talking nonsense.
DV: [sniffs] If you think I talk nonsense wait till you here this guy [sound of snapping fingers then a poof of smoke and Wing appears sitting on the floor] Oops, wrong one.
Otto: WIIINNNNGGG!
Wing: [backs away from Otto looking worried] Are you alright?
Otto: [bursts into tears] Nooooooo! Let me out of here!
DV: [sighs] I don't know how to.
Wing: [jumps] Who is that?
DV: [dreamily] You're destiny...uh...I mean Falcon...
Otto: [sniggers] sounds like a boy's name
Falcon: SHUT UP!
Wing: [eyeroll] So where exactly are you?
Falcon: Here.
Wing: Where?
Falcon: Behind you.
Otto: [girly scream]
Falcon: [slaps Otto] Stop screaming, no wonder girls seem to have a problem with you.
Wing: [smirks]
Falcon: [tries not to drool]
Otto: [rubs cheek] So how did you make us appear here?
Falcon: [Happy smile] Ah, the world of fanfiction...
Wing and Otto: [go pale]
Otto: [whimpers] You're one of those awful fanfic writers whose destiny it is to make every passing moment of our lives utter misery?
Falcon: [examines nails] Yup.
[silence]
Falcon: So then [turns to Otto] Alright mister genius albino person, it's up to you to get us out of here.
Otto: Me?
Falcon: [nods patiently] Yes Otto, you.
Otto: Oh. But can't you just send us somewhere and get us out of here?
Falcon: [blinks] Hmmmm...lets see [silence for a few moments then a poof of smoke and the threesome disappear from room]
In a lovely scenic valley surrounded by towering mountaintops, complete with the usual goats frisking around the tracherous grantie cliffs and yada yada yada...
Otto: This isn't HIVE!
Falcon: [looks pleased] Well I'd say it's a vast improvement...
Wing: Shelby!
Shelby: Wing!
Random Person: Shelby!
Falcon: What are you doing here?
Random Person: Urrr...I dunno.
Falcon: Right, [waves wand] Off you go
Random Person: [vanishes]
Falcon: [waves around wand] This is so cool!
Wing: What are you doing her Shelby?
Shelby: [confused] I have no idea?
Artemis Fowl: Urm, yes, why am I here as well?
Eragon: Yes, I would also like to know why I'm here.
Arya: Me also.
Franz: Ja...
Falcon: [looks exasperated] BECAUSE YOU ARE ALL IN MY FANFIC!
Eragon and Arya: Fanfic?
Artemis Fowl: [sighs deeply and raises eyes to the sky]
Otto: [bursts into tears again]
Wing: [slaps Otto]
Otto: [sniffle] Stop doing that!
Eragon: [raises eyebrows] So what are we supposed to do in this "fanfic" then?
Falcon: Urrr...I dunno, I had an idea and then I forgot it...
Artemis Fowl: [snorts] Honestly, you're pathetic, if you would let a boy genius take over then we could all get out of here...
Falcon: [slaps Artemis]
Artemis: What was the for?
Falcon: Well you seriously bugged me in the first, second and also sixth book so I was just letting it out.
Artemis: 0-o
Falcon: [points at Artemis and jumps up and down] I made Artemis Fowl speechless!
Eragon and Arya: [confused]
Otto and Wing: 0-o
Shelby: Eh?
Franz: [admires scenery]
Falcon: Now why don't we liven things up a bit?
Otto: [Runs off screaming]
Falcon: [strikes dramatic pose and points at Otto]
[poof of smoke and Lucy D appears in front of Otto]
Falcon: [headslams] I WAS SUPPOSED TO MAKE LAURA APPREAR FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!
Otto: [gaspeth] Lucy!
Lucy: [gaspeth] Otto!
[Both exchange a romantic kiss]
Falcon: Grrr...[karate chops keyboard] Ow.
A/N Whilst the author (me)recovers from her annoyance at bringing back the wrong girlfriend ther will be a break...if there are any other characters you would like to see please either:
a)PM me.
b)Review and type the characters down on there.
Oh yeah, let me just add this:
Some of you faithful reviewers may appear in this fanfic, just so you know ;) If you don't want to then let me know...