I'm Only Human
Disclaimer; What would you do if I said I owned Inuyasha? Too bad that's nothing but a dream.
Authors note::
A) If a word is missing the letter 's' then my apologies, my computer doesn't always type it, and I tend to not notice when it doesn't. Sorry to those who are as anal about grammar and spelling as I am. I'll try and fix anything that messes up in proof reading.
B) I don't really write full lemons unless necessary. It is not necessary in this one shot.
C) Enjoy.
(Inuyasha's POV:)
It was an average day in feudal Japan.
The sky was blue, the grass was green.
And Kagome was in fucking heat.
Inuyasha growled as the girl ran her fingers through her hair flinging her scent over towards him without even realizing the effect.
Her being in heat wouldn't be near as big a deal, if it wasn't also drop dead in the middle of mating season. Inuyasha would normally be able to suppress the inner demon inside him that was craving the young miko's body, if she just hadn't been in heat!
He'd studiously ignored her since her return trip through the well, receiving many confused looks, but after he had an embarrassing admittance last year about it being mating season, she normally didn't press her presence around him during spring.
Inuyasha immediately stood up deciding that maybe going away for a few hours would help him be able to clear his head. He didn't even notice the girl whom his fancies were pointed towards look up and watch him leave.
It was growing dark, but Inuyasha was still sitting in his favorite tree, not all too concerned with making it back to Kaede's. Being stuck in a room with Kagome, her scent filling up with no escape in such a small place, while eating was not exactly something, he was sure, would help his predicament.
He'd just set his head back against the trunk of the tree when he heard some rustling in the bushes around the base of the tree.
Kagome's voice came up calling out to him. "Inuyasha? Are you up there?"
"Whatd'ya want wench?" I grumbled loud enough for her to hear.
"I brought you something to eat. Thought you might have gotten hungry by now."
I jumped down crossing my arms. "I can take care of myself."
She sighed shaking her head, and just offered the carton of instant ramen to me. The smell hit me hard when her hand waved forward, the delicious scent of ramen mixing with her fragrant scent of vanilla.
Just to get away, I grabbed it quickly and walked a few paces away and sat down, a 'feh' being the last thing that I said. I hoped that would be enough to deter her from staying long.
Apparantly it wasn't.
She walked over and sat down, not close as usual and yet not far enough.
"Nice night." She said looking up at the sky. I was too busy ignoring her (while maybe inhaling the ramen as well) to answer.
Seeing how she wasn't getting an answer, she started to get up only to suddenly give a small cry when a brush of wind fanned out through the clearing, surprising us all.
I mentally slapped myself when Kouga stepped through, a cocky grin on his face. Even now, how could I NOT smell that piece of trash coming through?
"My dear Kagome, how pleasant it is to see you this evening." He said, immediately grabbing Kagome's hand and leaning down to lay a kiss onto it.
I was up fast, landing a punch before Kagome even had a chance to react. "Hands off, wolf." I said, standing with my arms crossed over my chest in front of Kagome. My inner demon growled at the audacity that anyone should touch my woma-
"Back off worthless half breed! Kagome is to be my mate!" Kouga yelled, already back on his feet in my face.
"No way she'd ever mate a mangy wolf like you!"
"Guys?" Kagome called out from behind me.
"Like she'd mate a stupid hanyou like you!"
"Uh- guys?"
"Who said I wanted her to?" I shouted back.
"Then you shouldn't have a problem with this," He said with a grin, and moved around me, quickly slipping an arm around Kagome's waist.
'Bastard, she's mine!' My inner demon screamed. I grabbed onto Kagome's arm and tugged her back to me. Her body immediately rammed into mine, and I had to shake off the stupor that came over me from her being so close so suddenly. Gently, I pushed her aside and made a move to grab my sword only to realize Tetsusaiga was not where it should've been.
I deadpanned remembering that I had left it at Kaede's before I had run off for an escape. My eyes came up and connected with Kagome's, who realized suddenly what exactly was wrong.
I was suddenly struck down to the ground, Koga's heavy weight smothering me as he began to pound his fist into me. I felt a flash of demon attempt to struggle through, as I worked to restrain the blows.
"Kouga! Kouga, get off of him!" Kagome cried, grabbing one of his arms and tugging back on it. He pushed back on Kagome forcing her to release his hand, as he reared back for another punch. And that was all it took, was that one simple shove, not even enough to hurt her.
The beast was released.
(Kagome's POV:)
I stumbled back a bit, gaping at the horrific sight in front of me. Kouga was fixing to let loose another barrage of punches, when I noticed Inuyasha's leg raise up as his foot deftly hit square in the middle of his stomach and sent Kouga flying.
I stood still watching as Kouga landed roughly in the ground a fair amount away, only to have my attention quickly return to Inuyasha.
He had rolled over onto his hands and knees, his face hidden by his mass of hair.
Not thinking, I slipped a hand over his shoulders, the other landing on his arm as I tried to look into his face.
"Inuyasha..? Inuyasha, are you okay?" I asked softly.
Through his back I could feel him growling, as his face slowly turned towards me. I gasped and moved back a bit as I noted the purple stripes growing and the flashing red eyes.
'Why, oh why didn't he bring the tetsusaiga?!' I yelled in my head. I could hear Kouga yelling more insults at Inuyasha, and apparently he could to. He slowly got up, his movements deliberatly slow. I could see his hands shaking, and I wondered in passing if maybe Inuyasha was trying to fight himself for control.
I could see Kouga in the bright moonlight, walking back over and brushing himself off and still yelling. 'Can he not sense the danger already?!' I thought angrily.
Inuyasha growled audibly and Kouga stopped and finally looked up. I saw his eyes widen, his mouth falling open a bit.
"What's goi-" He started, only to be cut off by me placing my body in front of Inuyasha. "Just run Kouga! Get away from here!"
Kouga still stood there stupidly, not knowing what was going on. Inuyasha was starting to get around me, so I grabbed him around the waist, tugging back to no avail.
"Kouga! Just go already! It's dangerous!"
"But what about you Kagome?" I could barely hear him over Inuyasha's snarling.
"I'll be fine, he won't hurt me." While I wasn't a hundred percent sure of this, I couldn't let Inuyasha kill Kouga.
He seemed to believe me all the same, and turned tail and ran. I held on to Inuyasha as long as I could, attempting to make it harder for him to give chase to Kouga. When I had known he had to be far enough away, I released Inuyasha.
He snarled and slumped towards where Kouga had been sniffing around, still growling lowly. When he didn't give and run away, I settled back against a tree, with my hands on my knees, and sighed.
I wasn't altogether sure what to do next, although I knew I had to somehow snap Inuyasha out of his demonic side.
'Then again, it is spring, his demonic side is a bit more-......... Oh shit.' That train of thought suddenly had me looking up to see Inuyasha coming back towards me. I wasn't an idiot, I knew what happened at this time of year, and why Inuyasha ignored me more than usual. 'You should've never came to check up on him Kagome! Now look what mess you've gotten into!' I thought to myself, figuring out what my best plan would be to get Inuyasha back to normal, or get away altogether.
'No,... I can't leave him alone like this. Who knows what he'll do!'
Inuyasha slowly started reaching for me, and when I attempted to step back I realized I was still pressed against the side of the tree. I cringed as his claws came in contact with my skin, although far more gentle than I had anticipated. I pushed his hand back softly, and tried to walk around him, hoping he would just let me go.
This only amounted to him taking hold of my arm and bringing me closer to him, a backfiring in my plan.
"Inuyasha!" I called, trying to bring the hanyou back into control. I looked up from his chest to his blood red eyes. I expected to feel fear, being so close to him in his demon counterpart, but I couldn't find it anywhere. Recognition was easily seen in his eyes, as he pondered down at me.
'What do I do?! I have to fight back somehow! Let's see , how have I done this before.... Oh!' Without thinking, I moved up on my tip toes and kissed him hesitantly, hoping it would shock him enough to bring him back, like the last time at Kaguya's Castle.
For a brief second I thought it had worked, as I felt him react. But then suddenly he was pulling me all too close, his tongue instantly invading my mouth, and I knew that this was a very wrong move. I pulled back on his hair, trying to pull his face back away from me. Not knowing what else to do, I pulled up my hand and slapped him across the cheek. His head snapped to the side, and the sound hurt my ears, the stinging in my hand being felt up my entire arm.
He turned his head back towards me and snarled, and for the first time in his presence, I felt true fear. I cowered at the sound, his haori suddenly knotted in my fingers with fright. For an instant, I thought he might hit me back, but instead one of his hands came up from my side, trailing up the side of my arm, and bringing my face back up to his.
It was hard to think of what to do, when Inuyasha (albeit his demonic side) was kissing me. Knowing I had only one more card I could pull, I waited it out until Inuyasha had moved on to my neck where he was nuzzling me far softer than I had imagined the demon was capable of. "Inuyasha?" His ear twitched.
"Sit."
Note to self, Inuyasha is heavy.
Another note to self, Inuyasha is extremely heavy when he's being pounded to the ground on top of you. What was learned? Never say 'sit' when you are directly in front of Inuyasha.
I groaned when I realized my stupidity. 'No wonder he hates this...' I thought as the spell slowly wore off, as Inuyasha lifted his head.
To my dismay, he hadn't been fixed, nor could I have put us into a worse position than the one we were in.
Inuyasha was pressed into every contour of my body, with his head hovering just above my face. The fall didn't seem to have fazed him in the least, as he suddenly moved down again to recapture my mouth.
'Inuyasha,... I tried. I really tried to fight you off. But I'm only human.' One of Inuyasha's hands came and wriggled it's way in between my back and the ground, pulling me even closer to him if it was possible.
'I hope you can forgive me for giving in.' His other hand roughly wound it's way into my hair keeping my face close to his.
'I'm sorry.' A tear slid down my cheek, as I pulled my arms around his neck, relenting.
Inuyasha had fallen asleep. The purple stripes had faded in his sleep, and I could only assume that when he woke up he would be back to normal.
Which left me to think and stew over what had passed between us. I could barely wrap my mind around the fact that I was no longer innocent. Untouched.
When at first it was over, Inuyasha had pressed his face into my chest and simply held me till he fell asleep, in which he rolled over. I threw his clothes back over him, and quickly cleaned and dressed myself, leading me to the point that I was at now.
'What am I going to do? When he wakes up, he's going to be furious at me..' I sat next to him, watching his face as he slept. It was the least tense I had seen his face in weeks, and it reminded me about why I loved to watch him sleep. 'He's always scowling. Or angry. It's nice to see him look so untroubled.' Of course, it wouldn't look that way for long once he woke up, but I would have to face it.
I brushed my fingers over his bangs, and played with the tips of his hair so as not to disturb him. I shivered as I remembered the way it felt to have his fingers brush over my skin. He was by far more gentle than I could've ever anticipated. Sure, it was still rough me being a human, and not being able to keep up with his demonic speed, but I had never expected such careful movements from him that way.
I sighed and curled up, putting my head onto my knees. The action caused a slight pain deep inside me, and I felt myself blush.
Sleep was close at hand when I heard Inuyasha stir about an hour later. I picked my head up, prepared to face whatever came my way.
He stretched out, his arms coming out at his side. He yawned a tongue curling yawn that made me picture more a cat than a dog, before he finally opened his eye and noticed me.
He stared at me for a minute or two before saying "Hey."
'He's awfully calm.' "Hey." I replied, waiting for him to remember and blow up. He looked around, rubbing his head.
"Man, my head hurts." Well that wasn't what I had been expecting.
"Huh?"
"My head hurts." He said, giving me a look.
"O-oh,... Need me to do something for you?" I asked quietly, not meeting his eyes.
"Nah, I'll be fine." He looked up at the sky, noting how dark it was, his brow furrowing.
"Where'd Kouga go?"
"He ran off." Well he had.
Inuyasha smirked at that, fully content with that answer.
'Does he not remember?!'
"C'mon, it's late. Let's get you back to Kaede's." I hadn't even noticed him standing up. His hand was offered to me uncharacteristically. I looked at his hand and looked up at him, surprised.
He pulled his hand back in.
"Well c'mon, wench."
I scrambled up quickly, following him as he began walking back to Kaede's hut.
'What's going on?'
(Inuyasha's POV)
I felt better than I had in weeks.
I had noticed it immediately, the sudden burden of mating season lightened, and I couldn't have been more appreciative for it.
'Well it is the last week of mating season, maybe it's just going into withdrawel mode.' Which worked for me.
I had made it to Kaede's hut, and I turned to make sure Kagome was following. She had her arms wrapped around herself, her head tucked down, walking slower than normal.
"What's up with you?" I asked, confused. She always had the ability to make me confused.
She looked up and her eyes seemed troubled.
"Are you feeling alright? Your white as a ghost." I said, raising a hand up to her forehead.
She moved out of the way. "What's up with you suddenly caring all of a sudden?" She said snippy.
I crossed my arms. "Man, What's up with you?" I asked again, but with more insentive.
She sighed. "Sorry, I'm just tired. I didn't get to sleep half the night like you did." She said, attempting to smile.
'And why didn't she?....' I was fixing to ask this before a certain priestess walked through, startling us both.
"Oh hello you two." She said softly. "It's awfully early to be up isn't it?"
"More like it's too late, for me. I'm going to bed. Night." Kagome said, and walked into the hut.
Kaede must have noticed me staring after her, for suddenly she asked, "Did something happen between ye and the child?" I scoffed.
"Kouga showed up, we fought, Kagome tried to get us to quit, end of story." 'Or was it. My memory seems a little fogged up.'
Kaede nodded absentmindedly. I didn't bother to wait for a reply and walked inside. Kagome had already laid out her sleeping bag and was curled up in it. I could hear her heartbeat speed up as I entered the room, and I had no clue as to what had made her suddenly so nervous around me.
I sat against the wall across from her, where I had sat not but hours before.
Eventually she fell asleep. And even though light was creeping through the windows and the doorway, I soon to found myself falling asleep.
A week later;;;;
I couldn't sleep. Not that I normally needed much, but I hadn't slept most of the past week, and it'd been a rough couple days as far as demon attacks went.
It didn't help that Kagome had gone to take a bath, and had yet to return.
'Why didn't she take Sango with her? It wouldn't have been that big a deal. But noo, someone just wanted to be 'alone'. Fft.' Inuyasha would never understand women.
Or why it bothered him so much that Kagome wasn't back yet.
After another half hour trying to sleep, he jumped down from his tree and stalked off to find the girl.
It didn't take long to find her. She was sitting at the edge of a hot spring, curled up, watching the water. Her hair was damp, and Inuyasha figured she was already done with her bath.
She was staring so intently that she didn't even notice Inuyasha walk up right next to her.
"Oi, wench, what're you doing?"
Startled, she flinched, and stared over at Inuyasha. Seeing it was him, she calmed slightly.
"I was just thinking."
I sat down next to her.
"What about?" I asked quietly.
She looked over at me, and I could see the pain in her eyes.
".....have you ever had something that you went through that you just couldn't tell anyone? Not because you weren't allowed to, but because you can barely believe it happened yourself?"
I wasn't all to sure what to say to this, but luckily she didn't wait for an answer.
"It sucks. Because it's something they need to know. I need to tell them. And everytime I try-," I winced when I smelled tear ducts start up. "I either get scared, or get interrupted."
The tears were starting to roll down her cheeks. I sighed and pulled her over to me. "Don't start crying on me now, wench." I said softly, trying to lighten up the mood. Crying girls were not my forte.
She sniffled, but was attempted to comply. "Now, whatever it is that's happened that's made you this upset, must've been important."
"Very." She replied softly.
"Well if it's that important, you should just say it."
She sighed. "I know. I'm just scared."
I brought my arm a little tighter around her.
She looked up at me and smiled. "Thank you Inuyasha."
"Feh." Her smile widened and she snuggled up closer to my side and was asleep within minutes.
I stroked her hair and thought, like I had many times, about the things I wanted to be able to say, but was afraid to. Number one being the secret that I held from Kagome.
'It's times like these where I wish I could just tell you Kagome. But the truth is, I'm scared to...'
Before long, I fell asleep as well.
I was demon. That much I was sure of at the moment. Everything that I could see had just a tinge of red, and the taste of malice was flooding my mouth. I could feel anger and revenge flooding every fiber of my body.
'She's mine.' My instincts told me.
Mine.
My Kagome.
Kouga will die for touching her.
Mine.
'What the hell is going on?' I asked myself.
My mate.
'Mate? What the..?' I screamed but was studiously ignored by my demon half.
Kouga dissipated from my vision, and was replaced by a shadowy figure.
The warm smell of vanilla filled my nose, and the taste filled my mouth.
Kagome's face filled my vision.
I felt her hands on my body, and the beast became satiated.
I woke up with a start, sweaty, and my heart racing.
I rarely dreamed, and when I did it was usually about my past. A few were even about Kagome.
But never had they been so vivid. It was almost like it was a memory, the way we moved, how I could feel and smell everything around me.
A soft groan was heard, and I felt Kagome wriggle where her head sat in my lap.
I smiled, and gently cradled her head to a more comfortable position.
Her face was almost angelic, with no signs of worry or stress. Her raven tresses, while messy, still framed her face creating a contrast.
Gently, I moved the hair of her face and neck, pulling it back from her, when something caught my eye.
My brow furrowed as I squinted at the mark that lay on her neck.
I was aware of my hands shaking.
My eyes were wide, and I blanched.
'The hell..?'
(Kagome's POV)
I was aware I was awake. I could feel sunlight being soaked through my arms and feet. The noises of the outside were audible to my ears. I stretched my joints in a way that left everything feeling relieved and made me want to lay there for just another minute longer.
'Alright Kagome, today's the day. Tell him today.' I nodded to myself, and finally opened my eyes, squinting in the early morning light.
Standing up, I looked around. When I spotted the familiar silver hair and red haori, I smiled.
"Hey." I said cheerily walking towards him.
He didn't reply, and it wasn't till then that I noticed his stock still posture. His arms were crossed tightly over his chest, his knuckles white from how they were clenched together.
"Inuyasha... Are you okay?"
His head snapped to the side so fast, I barely registered the movement.
"W-What is it?" I asked, not sure what was going on.
Suddenly he reached out and grabbed my wrist twisting me into him roughly. I was now looking at my own face in the still water beneath us.
"What is it," he repeated, "When did you plan on telling me about this?" He said, and pulled my hair off my neck and pulled it over my other shoulder.
"Inuyasha, your hurting me!" His grip tightened on my wrist ever so slightly. Tears immediately started to roll down my face.
"Kagome! Why didn't you say anything about this?" He shouted, releasing her from his hold. She flew forward a few feet, catching herself before she fell. "How do you think I feel when I wake up and see that- that mark on you! To wake up one day and be mated for eternity?"
"Shut up." I whispered shakily.
"What?" He growled out, taking a step closer.
"I said shut up!!" I turned, my hand flying out and smacking him across the face for the second time in my life. This time I felt my heart breaking with it. He stood there dazed, his cheek turning a bright red.
"You don't know what I've gone through the past week! It's not like I asked for this either!"
"Then what the hell did you do?"
"You turned into a full demon! You were having mating instincts. I couldn't snap you out of it, which let me assure you buddy, I tried!"
Inuyasha's eyes narrowed slightly, but his expression wasn't near as pained, at least not with the same guilt he was feeling now.
"Kagome, I-"
"No, listen to me Inuyasha! I've wanted to tell you this all week, and I was going to today before you blew up at me." I yelled, tears still streaming down her face, "It's been hard, so hard to keep it from you. I've even tried to tell you a few times!"
My voice began to grow quiet. "I'm sorry that this happened. I'm sorry I couldn't stop it from happening. I'm sorry your stuck with me."
I looked back up again into his eyes, "But don't you dare criticize me for what happened."
And then I turned and ran.
(Inuyasha's POV)
I stood still with my eyes wide. No words could describe the guilt I felt pooling in the pit of my stomach.
"Kagome.." I whispered.
"Kagome!" I shouted. I started to follow after her scent as it trailed through the forest.
'Damn, I really screwed things up this time.. I won't be surprised if she ever talks to me again.' I thought to myself.
"Kagome!" I shouted again. She had really gained some ground in the few minutes I had lost standing stunned. Her scent was fading and I turned trying to find it's strongest point.
Following that, I finally made it to a large clearing.
Looking around, I spotted Kagome huddled up, her shoulders shaking, her sobs finally reaching my ears. I felt my heart wrench in my chest.
Slowly I walked up to her stopping only when I was directly in front of her.
"Kagome..." I whispered softly. She looked up at me, and I felt the guilt all over again wash through my body.
Practically collapsing, I fold down in front of her grabbing her shoulders and pulling her into my body, bringing her as close as I could.
Attempting to console her, I began raking my fingers through her hair. Eventually her arms came around me and she buried her face into my chest.
"I'm so sorry Kagome." I whispered into her ear. I situated her so that she was in my lap and gently began to rock her.
"I was just so confused. Which isn't much of an excuse, but it's all I got."
Kagome nodded.
"I understand." She murmured, her voice quiet. "I know it had to have been a shock for you.. I was just so scared to say it.."
I numbly reached for her wrist that I had grabbed when I'd been angry, and started rubbing it. "I know"
A bit of time passed in silence as we sat and just soaked it all in, before finally, a question worth asking floated into my mind.
"Kagome?"
"Hmm?" She said, seemingly being dragged from a thought.
"Did I hurt you? I mean, that night with Kouga."
She sat up and looked up at me as if that was actually a stupid question.
"No,.. Not at all. You were actually very gentle." A ghost of a smile appeared on her face. "You were alot like you are now." She nodded towards the embrace in which I held her.
I felt a little color rise in my cheeks. "I just wish I could remember something..." Kagome gave a little giggle. "I didn't mean it like that I just--" but I was cut off by her fingers pressing against my mouth.
"Understood. No need to explain."
She settled back down into my lap, and I spent another few minutes watching her.
"Ya know.. I wasn't completely honest with you either."
"What're you talking about?"
I smiled and thought back to a memory. "You remember when I told you about my mating season, right?"
"Yeah." She said, "You got really embarassed."
I rolled my eyes, but nodded. "But I wasn't completely honest when you asked why I wanted you."
"Oh." She squeaked slightly.
"Yep. See I told you that it was just 'cause you were the female around the most."
"Right."
"Well, you see....that's not the only reason as to why it was you." I could feel my heart pounding in my chest, as my hand came up to her face and lifted it up to face me.
"Mating instincts only occur once you've found a person you love."
Her gasp was loud to my ears.
I let her face go, and lifted my own head up to the sky ahead, only to be dragged back down by her hand.
"Y-you love me?" She asked weakly. I gave her a smile.
"I do."
She began to sit up, her eyes never breaking contact with mine.
It was quiet for a long time before she finally spoke.
"I love you to, Inuyasha." Her voice was warm, and I couldn't remember ever feeling more alive.
My hands came up and pulled her head towards mine until we were forehead to forehead. I could've stayed like that for forever, looking into those eyes.
I let my hand slide down until it reached the juncture of her neck, where my mark lain on her skin. I gently pressed it tenderly. Still keeping eye contact, I whispered, "Mine" before reaching my face forward till her mouth met mine.
Authors Note:: Goodness gracious. This took me way to long to write. Have you ever had those days where you think you'll type a short little one shot and it goes alot longer than it should? Anyways, I'm not really sure what I think about this. I'm way overanalytical and critical with my own work. Then again, I don't really know what I'm thinking when it's 1:17 in the morning anyways. This was just an idea that sorta grew, and it was one that didn't involve chapters (which I love, but I have horrible update timing, for future reference).
I suppose tell me what you think.
R&R,
Souzousei