Dear Diary;
It's been a while since I last wrote to you. And I am truly sorry for that. But I've been busy. Oh, forgot to mention, I spoke to my father since the last time I wrote to you, he misses me, and I miss him, I truly do. I wish I could live with him. But Renee would never allow it. I know all of her excuses for it. *sigh* I wish I could at least talk to Charlie today. He said he'd call. That is after work. He is head of the police station down in Forks, Washinton. Renee and Phil have been acting weird lately. And I feel he'll come again. Phil that is. I haven't told anyone this, not even you, faithful friend, but I'm scared. It's not easy for me to even begin to speak of it. But I must go now, I hear someone coming. God help me if its him.
-Bella Swan

I threw my little book under my pillow and moved to the corner of me bed. I'm almost 17, I thought, time to be brave. I rushed to my door, just as it opened. I shut it with enough force to close it, and pushed my hand over the lock. After I heard it click, I fell to the floor on my knees, sobbing quietly.

"Isabella Marie Swan! Open this damn door!" My stepfather yelled.

"No, go away!" Tears were strolling down my cheeks, as I looked at the bruises on my wrists, my arms. "You've had your pleasure. Now leave me alone!" The sobbing continued.

The door felt as if it might shatter under his fists.

"I swear to God, Bella, you'll be in more heaping pain because of this childish rejection."

I hugged my knees tightly as he spoke. Wasn't I already in pain? Isn't this Hell? He was gone for now, but the thought of him coming back for another one of his "lessons" brought fresh tears to my eyes. I pushed myself to my knees, and then to my feet. Walked over to the nightstand, and pulled out the knife out of the drawer. After rolling up my sleeves, I placed the blade down on my skin at an angle, and pulled down in a swift but also slow motion, drawing blood. This brought pain, but pleasure as well. I let the blood flow from the cut. Drip, drop.

I whispered to myself, "This is a better pain than he'd give me."

~~~~~~~~~~~NEXT MORNING~~~~~~~~~

I woke up, still fully dressed in yesterday's clothing. The sun was peaking through the curtains. I moaned as I heard a knock on the door. But to my bitter disappointment, I got up to answer it.

"Mom?" I gasped as I saw her mascara was running from her eyes, and so were tears.

"Ch-Charlie..." She broke down crying again. "He's dead! He's been murdered!"

My knees buckled under me, but my hand was still on the door. "Wh-what?" I closed my eyes and shook my head. "No, he can't be dead. Not murdered. My father?"

Renee embraced me, and held on tight. I just stood there, staring at the wall. I finally came to my senses, and pushed my mother off of me, even though she was sobbing, and shut my door. I sobbed the rest of the morning, and day because the next thing I knew, Renee was calling me for dinner. I walked sluggishly down the stairs, through the kitchen and to the table.

"Where's Phil?" Not that I cared.

"He's at the office dealing with the arrangements," she said.

"What arrangements?" I slowly took a bite of my salad.

"For the funeral. We're going to Forks for it, maybe even stay a while. Bella," she sighed my name when she noticed I was thinking.

"Yes, mom?"

"You know you can't."

I looked up to glare at her. "Can't? Can't what? Live in Forks? I want to. I need to!" I need to get away from Phil. I took a break before I continued. "I'm seventeen, soon to be eighteen. I can stay with the Black's or...or the Cullen's. Mom, look at me." Her eyes were filled with tears, as were mine. "I have to. Dad is apart of me, Forks is apart of him. I need to be there. I want to. I can finish up school there. But mom, listen, I want to go, in fact I should have gone in the beginning of the school year, but I didn't. Dad asked me to, and I..I didn't. And now I'll never see him again."

She nodded. "You make a good point. And staying with the Black's or Cullen's is a great choice."

The front door opened, shut. Sure enough Phile walked into my room. Hugged me gently, then moved to Renee, for a more passionate, comforting hug. "We can leave this weekend."

Renee looked up at him, then at me. "So soon?" She broke down into sobs. I knew what she meant. He rubbed her back and looked at me.

"Bella, hun, what does she mean 'so soon'?"

I looked up at him, and gulped. "I--I'm moving to Forks. After the funeral."

He glanced back at Renee. "You're letting her to this? Our baby girl?" Our? I am her baby girl. I looked away from him.

"Phil, she is going to be living with the Cullen's. Or the Black's. Which ever will take her in. She said she needs to, and that she-she wants to. I believe her, and I am her biological parent, and I am letting her go."

"Okay, well, we better start packing." He glared at me.

After he left the room, I locked my door, and grabbed my suitcases. After packing one suitcase, I unlocked my door for a bit, thinking he wouldn't come. I walked to me bed, then all of a sudden the door flew open. I turned on my heels, and gasped. He was there. He shut the door, locked it then crossed the room instantaneously. He covered my mouth and threw me on the bed.

"I told you; you would pay."

He was on top of me, pinning me down on my mattress. I started crying, and I tried pushing him away as he ripped my clothes off my shaking body. A scream threatened in my throat, but he pushed me down hard on the bed, seeing the fear in my eyes. After shredding the last of my clothes, he did the same to his, and then entered me, while still having me pinned to the bed. My cries of pain brought him pleasure, and my pain was worse this time. Just like he promised. I screamed, louder and louder I screamed. He finally stopped, the pain he left me in was a burning flame. He put his clothes back on, watched me cry in pain, and then left.

I just layed there, the pain burning me. I wish there was an actually fire. I rolled over on my side, sobbing, and pulled the covers over myself. When I'm in Forks, I can leave all of this behind me. I have to, I thought before closing my eyes to sleep.

A/N-Heyy there fellow readers, I know I am a little descriptive-my bad- but you had to know what was going on in Bella's life before she moves to Forks. I'll have next chapter up either tomorrow or the next day but sometime VERY soon. :D Review plz!!!!! *waves bye to you*