This is my first piece of fanfic that I've shared. I usually just write for myself. Feedback or comments greatly appreciated. Takes place at the end of season 4 of Orphan Black, after the inevitable Cophine reunion.

"Promises to Hold" - Chapter 1: Future Dreams and Optimism

Cosima and Delphine lay naked together in bed, their legs intertwined. Their reunion had been wonderful, like out of a dream, but this was the first night they were able to spend alone together. Cosima's head was resting on Delphine's chest, nestled under her chin. Delphine stroked the brunette's hair, tracing the lines of her dreads against her scalp. Delphine sighed, content to be pressed against her lover, resting their heads together. Slowly, Cosima traced her fingers across the scar on the right side of Delphine's abdomen. The scar was circular, but jagged at the edges. It was clear the bullet had torn through her, and the repairs to her abdomen had not been gentle. The scar was still pink, as though the wound had only just sealed up. Lightly stroking the scar, Cosima's eyes filled with tears. She raised her head and bent down to kiss the spot, dripping tears onto her stomach.

Delphine shivered, jolts of electricity coursing up her spine. The spot was no longer sensitive to the touch, but the memory was still painful. A small whimper escaped Delphine's mouth, betraying her feelings. She did not want Cosima to see how afraid she had been that night. Delphine had always been the strong one in their relationship, making the difficult decisions despite her own feelings. Now all she wanted was for Cosima to hold her and never let go, giving into her feelings of vulnerability.

Crawling up to face Delphine, Cosima saw that her girlfriend also had tears in her eyes. The memory of the night she was shot was still fresh in Delphine's mind. Sometimes she had nightmares of that night, seeing the gun pointed at her. The dreams always ended the same way; she slipped away from Cosima forever. The nightmares were less frequent now that the two were reunited, but the reality of what happened was not lost on them.

Looking into Delphine's eyes, Cosima whispered, "I almost lost you." A sob catching in her throat, Cosima continued, "I thought I was never going to see you again. I thought you were gone forever."

At this, Delphine grabbed the sides of Cosima's face and pressed her lips firmly against her own. Passionately, they kissed each other, assuring each other of their presence, breathing each other in. They had been apart for so long. First by Delphine's choice, a desperate decision to protect her girlfriend. Then by distance, silence, and uncertainty. In all those months apart, neither knew what had become of the other. When Cosima was told that Delphine was shot dead, her world collapsed around her. Isolated and alone all of those months, Delphine didn't know if Cosima was still fighting for life, or if the disease had consumed her. Now, together at last, the two felt determined not to be separated again.

Gasping for air, Delphine pulled away from the kiss and rested her forehead against Cosima's. Despite having spent the whole day together, the physical reassurance of Cosima's body was a comfort to Delphine. Wiping the tears from the corners of Cosima's eyes, and stroking her cheeks, she gazed into her girlfriend's eyes. "Ma cherie," she cooed.

"It felt like you were saying goodbye. The whole thing with Shay…" Cosima trailed. "And when I couldn't find you, couldn't reach you," Cosima cried, "I feared the worst. And then Evie said you were shot dead…" A fresh wave of sobs hit Cosima like a wall, turning into a thick coughing spell.

Delphine gently rubbed Cosima's back until the coughing fit was over. Delphine could tell that Cosima was physically weaker than the last time she saw her. The disease was catching up with her again. Their love making had been desperate, passionate, and fueled by months of unquenched longing. Their day of love making had drained all of her energy, so that now she practically laid her entire weight upon Delphine. She could tell that Cosima didn't want to show her just how exhausted she was.

Delphine pulled her back against her body. "I was saying goodbye, the only way I knew how. I wanted to give you another chance at love, even if it was without me." These words caught in Delphine's throat, her voice breaking. "But I came back for you," she said, echoing Cosima's words back to her.

"Everything you did was for me," Cosima stated, just a hint of questioning in her voice.

"It has all been for you, chérie" Delphine replied. "Je t'aime."

Sniffling back more tears and sinking further into Delphine's embrace, "I love you too," Cosima whispered. "Tell me a story?"

"Alright, ma chérie. There were once two scientists who weren't meant to fall in love with each other, but they did. They met at a university, where they bonded over study sessions and long nights in the lab. They found out that their connection was more than just crazy science. They understood each other on a molecular level.

"One night they kissed for the first time, and the two became one. The scientists became girlfriends, and had many adventures together. They became scientific researchers together, making groundbreaking discoveries in their fields. And they lived happily ever after. The end."

"That's cheating," Cosima teased, letting out a small chuckle. "You can't use our story. And that's not exactly how it happened."

"I know. I just like to think that without Dyad and the monitor program, you and I would still have found each other."

"Yeah, I'd like to think that too. And I wouldn't be sick," Cosima added.

"The embryonic stem cells from the blastocyst will work."

"Yeah, totally," Cosima agreed, not sounding entirely confident in her reply.

Delphine picked up on the slight sound of defeat in Cosima's voice. "You can't give up now, ma chérie. We are close, I can feel it." Delphine tried her best to sound exude confidence. After everything they had been through, they needed this. They had both come back from the brink of death and found each other, but Delphine was acutely aware that they were once again on a race against time.

"We are going to cure you," Delphine continued. "You and Charlotte and MK, and all of your sisters."

She reached for Cosima's hand, and interlocked their fingers. "What next? Tell me something good," Cosima asked.

Delphine's spirit lifted at the thought of the future, after Cosima was cured and the clones were no longer in danger. "Well," she began, "you and your sisters would be safe. There would be no more monitors or threats from the Neolutionists. Helena will have her babies, and you'll be their aunt."

"Yeah, a kick ass aunt," Cosima laughed. "I'll have those kids reciting the periodic table before they're out of diapers. I'm already working on Kira."

Laughing alongside Cosima, she continued, "We'll move in together, and have your whole family over for the holidays."

"Move in together?"

A long silence followed, and a feeling of anxiety welled up in Delphine's chest. She had been stroking Cosima's hand, weaving her fingers in and out. At this reply, she stopped, her whole body tensing up. What if Cosima was still hurt from their break up? What if she was way ahead of her, jumping to conclusions without really knowing what Cosima wanted. In her head this whole time, she had been calling Cosima her girlfriend, but they hadn't made it official again.

"If…if that is what you want," Delphine replied sheepishly.

"I, I would love that, Delphine. Don't leave me again."

Relaxing into Cosima again, Delphine whispered, "don't be afraid, I will never leave you." These words felt oddly familiar to Delphine, like she had spoken them to Cosima before. Only, she couldn't remember actually saying them. Shaking the thought away, she decided that those words must have been out a dream. "When this is all over, I want to take you to France to meet my parents."

"Are you sure? I mean, that would be awesome, it's just…" Cosima trailed. "Have you told them about me? Have you told them that you're dating a woman?"

"I've told them that I'm in a serious relationship, but I haven't divulged many details yet. I thought it was safer that way," Delphine admitted. "But don't worry, ma chérie, I know they will love you."

"Ok, I'm cool with that. What else?"

"Well, I can show you where I grew up, take you on a tour in my hometown. Have you ever been to the French countryside, my love?"

"Unfortunately, no. Student loans don't allow you much freedom to travel."

"We will remedy that immediately. There's a beautiful vineyard I want take you to, with a quaint little bed and breakfast."

"Mmmh, Dr. Cormier. Wine and sex. You're a romantic at heart, aren't you?" Cosima smiled.

Delphine loved Cosima's crooked grin, and the way her eyes lit up when a bright idea popped in her head. Her energy level seemed to have increased, as if talking about the potential future fed her strength. Smiling back at Cosima, she pecked a small kiss on the top of her forehead, and bumped noses with her, breathing in the smell of her. "It's strange, I never used to be," Delphine explained. "But now I am, with you."

"Yes, I've been told I have that effect on women." Cosima mused.

"What?" Delphine gasped. "What women?"

Cosima's serious expression broke, a devilish grin spreading across her face. She had a terrible poker face, especially when playing a joke on someone. That was one of the many little things that Delphine loved about Cosima. She had the type of free spirit and sense of humor that loved playfully teasing people, playing practical jokes, and using witty sarcasm. However, she could never hold a straight face for very long until her face split into a smile and burst of giggles.

"Brat." Delphine replied, pinching her butt as Cosima laughed.

"Ouch!" Cosima squealed. "That actually hurt."

Delphine was about to apologize, but narrowed her eyes and said, "Cheeky. I don't believe you."

Another grin spread across Cosima's face. "Yeah, ok, that didn't really hurt," Cosima admitted. "Especially not compared to being poked and pricked with needles all the time."

Delphine watched as Cosima's face eclipsed from cheery to somber, as if she had just remembered how sick she still was. Desperate to keep her in good spirits, Delphine resumed the conversation about the future. "We could travel other places too. What is one place you've always wanted to go before you…." Delphine caught herself.

"Before I die?" Cosima finished.

"Merde, Cosima, that's not what I meant," Delphine gasped. "I only meant, well, I want us to have lots of adventures together."

Cosima nodded, forgetting the comment. "I want to take you to San Fran to meet my parents. You'll love them. They're both academics, but not the stuffy, boring types. Mom has a huge garden in their backyard. She grows most of her own vegetables. When I was in high school, I started growing my own marijuana patch in the backyard. Mom was cool enough to pretend not to notice. She's the one that first introduced me to yoga, and helped me dread my hair when I first started wearing it this way. Dad is a hopeless bookworm. He's got this huge library in his study filled with hundreds of books. Ask him any bit of literary trivia, and he'll be able to answer. He wouldn't seem it, but he's also got great taste in music."

Delphine loved the way that Cosima talked about her parents. "I'm sure I will love them."

"Yeah. I know you will. They both work in the humanities. They sometimes tease that they have no idea where my love for science came from."

"It's you. It's just uniquely you."

"Obs," Cosima agreed. "I'm not sure I want to float that whole 'clone' thing yet. Though, I suppose I would have to explain sooner or later if…"

"If what?"

Cosima hesitated, her voice growing softer with vulnerability. Delphine could tell she was struggling with a thought, trying to figure out the right way to say it. Whatever was on Cosima's mind, it was important. Cosima's utter stillness was unnerving. "What is it, ma chérie? You're scaring me."

"If…what if," Cosima stammered. "What if we got married."

Cosima bit her lip, the way she does when she's particularly nervous about something. Her eyes were wide and full, searching Delphine's face. Delphine did not know how to react. She definitely was not expecting that tonight. It was one thing to talk about traveling together and meeting parents. It was another thing entirely to talk about marriage.

"I know it's really soon. Too soon probably. And I'm not asking you right now, but one day. That wasn't a proposal right then. This is definitely not how I would do it," Cosima rambled, her hands waving around with every word. "Not that I've thought a lot about how I would propose to you."

Delphine could tell she was nervous, and caught her flapping hands. A warmth spread throughout Delphine's body. The thought had crossed her mind so many times, but life just kept getting in the way. More accurately, she kept getting in her own way. She knew she had betrayed and hurt Cosima so many times. She had been wondering if they could both move past those rough times and try again. This was way more than she expected.

"Do you really want to?" Delphine asked. "I mean, do you really want me, forever? Even after everything we've been through?"

The thought of Cosima changing her mind was almost too much to bear, but she had to be sure. Achingly, she remembered how Cosima had jumped right into a new relationship after their breakup. The separation didn't seem to have affected Cosima the way that it affected her, but maybe she was wrong. After all, she was the one who ended it. If Cosima's goal in dating Shay was to make her jealous and afraid for her safety, she had succeeded.

Delphine reflected that she was usually the one to initiate the big steps in their relationships. She was the first one to admit that she had fallen for her girlfriend, that terrible night when Cosima left Minnesota. She was the first one to say, "Je t'aime," and even then Cosima's response wasn't immediate. Then she remembered what Cosima had told her in her office at Dyad. She had almost died, but came back for her. For her! That reality came on her like a wave, and she realized that Cosima was serious. She really meant it.

"I love you," Cosima whispered. "And all I know is that when I thought you were gone, it was like a part of me died along with you. All I wanted was to be back with you somehow. I never want to be away from you again."

Cosima's eyes were full of tears, her lips quivering as she finished speaking. Delphine had her answer. A weight was lifted off of her shoulders, a burden that she hadn't even realized was weighing her down. Those words, those sweet words lifted her soul, and she felt like she could fly.

Giving into the surge of love for her girlfriend, Delphine grabbed Cosima's face and crushed her lips against her own. Passionately, they kissed. One of Cosima's hands found its way into her hair, pulling her closer. The other was on the blonde's neck, trailing its way down her girlfriend's slender body. Delphine could taste Cosima's salty tears as they streaked down her cheeks. She kissed them away, pressing her cheeks against Cosima's. In between breaths, Delphine said, "Yes, yes. My answer will always be yes."

" – I love you."

" – Je t'aime."

Repeatedly, they assured one another between kisses until they were both too breathless to continue. Collapsing back on top of Delphine, Cosima asked, "Do you promise?"

"I promise."