This is my first ever fan fic, so go easy on me. I've had the idea in my head since the finale but I got to nervous to post. I've already written about 12 of the chapters and there's still another 4 or so to come. Any reviews would be greatly appreciated, good or bad. Thank you!

Note: Anything in italics is a flashback or a memory.

Chapter 1 - Waking Up

To say that Kate was in pain was an understatement.

She woke up, lying down in a bed with stiff, white sheets. All she could see was the ceiling. There was a constant beeping sound which sounded like a heart monitor and there was that sickening smell of disinfectant. She didn't have to be a detective to know where she was. Her vision was slightly blurred and it was taking everything she had not to fall back asleep. What had happened? She didn't remember getting injured to end up in a hospital. At least that's where she though she was. It was the only place she could think of that would describe the sensations she was overcome with particularly the searing pain in the middle of her chest, just to the right of her heart, which was still beating steadily. After a few seconds, she heard a voice she couldn't place.

"Miss Beckett. You're finally awake. You're in the hospital." A nurse was staring down at her, with a slight smile gracing her features. She was right. The hospital. Duh. But why?

"Wh-" Kate had barely spoken before she started to cough, each one sending a wave of agony over her body. Her mouth was like cotton and her throat hurt like hell. The nurse gave her a few ice chips to suck on before she attempted to speak again.

"What happened to me? Why am I here?" Her croaky words seemed to have worried the older woman who's expression changed from optimistic to concerned in a matter of seconds. Not good.

"You were shot Miss Beckett. By a sniper at a funeral. You're incredibly lucky you're not lying in a casket right now. The surgeons did one hell of a job. It took them just over 6 hours before they finally wheeled you out of there." She paused a moment before breaking the silence. "What's the last thing that you remember?"

"Uhh... I was at the Precinct with by friends. I was speaking to Castle and his ex-wife turned up. I can't remember anything after that. Everything has gone black. What day is it now?"

"It's the 18th of May, 2011. The weather is just getting nice isn't it?"

Beckett wasn't listening to her comments about the weather. 2011? Last time she could remember was 2010. Gina and Castle.

"It's not just this weekend we're talking about is it?"

She had decided to break up with Demming. She liked him. She really did, but there were feelings for someone else rising to the surface and they were greater than those she held for Tom. Esposito had a point. Maybe Castle did just hang around to see her, not for research, and now Demming had appeared, it hurt him to see her with another guy. She could lose the detective, but she couldn't lose the writer.

"No." She replied quietly, shaking her head. She looked away, seeing hurt spread across his face.

"Was it something I said, Kate? Something I did?"

"No. No." She felt guilty, for leaving him just days after they'd begun, but there was someone he wasn't. He wasn't Castle. Her Castle. "You're great. You're really great, and I really like you. It's just I don't think this is what I'm looking for right now."

"What is it your're looking for, Kate?"

She looked through the window and saw him on the other side.

Beckett walked into the conference room to find the Captain, the boys, Lanie and Castle laughing away whilst eating pizza. It was time to tell him she wanted to go with him to the Hamptons. She'd been trying to pluck up the courage for an hour or two. As soon as she entered, Castle's head shot up to look at her.

"Oh... Well look who's off duty!" He sounded cheerful and she grinned slightly as she opened a beer.

"Yeah well, Castle, I'm not all work."

"Don't get into a drinking contest with her. She can take you." Lanie was trying to be serious, but she was just trying to send Castle's imagination wild.

"Thank you."

"Oh, I don't need to drink to take him."

She could see the effect the comment had on him just by looking at his face as the words left her mouth.

"Oooh! What's gotten into you?" Lanie was definitely shocked to hear her best friend be flirty with someone, especially in front of all her colleagues.

"Castle. Do you have a second?" She tried to say it quietly to avoid raising suspiscion, which failed considering she was in a room with an ME and a bunch of cops.

"Of course, yeah." He pulled back his chair to follow her outside, closing the door so the guys couldn't hear them. "What's up?"

"Look... I know that I'm not the easiest person to get to know... And I don't always let on what's on my mind, but this past year working with you... I've had a really good time."

"Yeah, me too." She could tell he was trying to work out what she was about to say. He was unusually quiet. He would normally try and butt in with a jokey comment.

"So... I'm just gonna say this and..."

"Richard?" She focussed her attention on the blonde woman walking towards them. "You ready?"

"Hey, Gina. Beckett, you remember Gina, my ex-wife?"

"Publisher." She held out her hand and Beckett shook it, seeing the guys get up to take a peek in her peripheral vision.

"Yeah, we spoke the other day. Looks like you've finally tracked her down." Beckett tried to stay sounding positive. What was happening? She was about to tell Castle how she felt. She liked him and wanted to go to his beach house with him and suddenly his ex-wife/publisher had turned up out of nowhere. This wasn't supposed to be happening.

"Oh, yeah. He's such a little boy sometimes. I mean, I don't know why. It's not like I bite. Much." She felt sick. Her moment had been ruined. If only she'd said something sooner. "We better get going or we're gonna be stuck in traffic all night."

"Going?" Nothing could make this moment worse.

"To the Hamptons." Bam. It was worse.

"For the weekend?" Please, God. Just the weekend and he'll be back.

"No, for the summer actually." Seriously, she'd never felt so lousy. "So I can stay on top of him while he finishes his book." Her heart hurched at the thought that she'd be doing that in more way than one.

"I'm sorry." She was struggling to form coherent sentences. "I didn't think the two of you got along."

"We didn't. But, then, last night on the phone, we got talking..."

"... And ended up talking for hours. Just like old times."

"So I'm uhh.. sorry. You were telling me something." She couldn't say anything. She couldn't tell him after that. He looked happy and she couldn't spoil it when she wasn't certain he had any feelings for her. It didn't look like it right now.

"Yeah. I wanted to say... Have a great summer."

"You too. And like you said, it's been really, really great."

"Yeah, it has."

They looked at each other before Castle started to leave. They shook hands. She'd be hoping they'd have been doing more than shaking hands right now. Hugging him? Kissing. Holding his hand? Yeah right. Who was she kidding? She was just a Detective.

"See you in the fall?" She called after him, giving him a final chance to change his mind, even if he didn't know it.

"See you in the fall." And he turned and walked away.

All she could do was stand there, trying not to catch Lanie's eye. They'd heard everything but she couldn't do anything but grab her coat and head home whilst willing herself not to let the tears spill over.

"Are you OK, Miss? You look confused. It's normal not to remember a few hours before your accident. Although they don't always return to our memories right away."

There was someone new here now. He had a stethoscope around his neck and wearing scrubs. Obviously a doctor. He was visably concerned.

"Are you listening? You sustained some pretty serious injuries. The bullet hit your chest and broke several ribs and punctured your lungs, so it's normal if you have slight difficulty breathing, but if it gets really bad, don't hesistate to ask us to turn up your oxygen levels. OK?" She was still staring ahead at the door. She'd been sat up in the last few minutes. Or rather, the bed had sat up for her. It relieved some of the pain but that wasn't what was bothering her. "Can you tell me the date?"

"It's 2010. Isn't it? Memorial day weekend?"

The doctors face was overcome by a troublesome expression. She could tell something was very wrong with what she'd just said.

"Miss Beckett..."

"Detective Beckett."

"Sorry, Detective Beckett. I'm afraid a year has passed since that date. It's 2011." He paused. "I believe you have amnesia caused when you hit the ground after being shot. The type that you appear to have means that you have forgotten the events in your life over the past year, but you still remember who you are, your childhood and most importantly, your family. I know this news is hard to process, but there is still a possibility it will come back over time. It could all be back within a week or two, a few years, or not at all. But I would suggest talking to your friends so they can tell you the main events of your life in the past year. I will tell them about your amnesia before sending them in, yes?"

Woah. Amnesia. Not something she'd been expecting. A whole year. She'd lost 365 days of her life and there was no telling if she'd ever get them back.

"Yeah, please. Who's out there?" There couldn't have been many people. Lanie, the boys, the Captain and her Dad.

"There are two young men in uniforms with a woman. She very loud, if that helps. There's also someone I believe to be your father, a young red-headed girl with a red-headed woman and a man who won't stop pacing. He hasn't been home in the 48 hours you've been in here."

She guessed that meant Ryan and Esposito, Lanie and her father. But why would Martha and Alexis be there. And was she correct in thinking that the man pacing the halls could be Castle? He'd left for the Hamptons with Gina. Why would he be here if he hadn't returned to the Precinct?

"Yeah, could you send them in?"

"All of them?" He sighed. "It's against hospital policy to send more that 2 or 3 people in at once at this stage in your recovery, but it's been two days and they haven't seen you at all. Any sign of stress or pain and they're all out again. Understand?"

"Yes, I do. Please, I need to get my memory back."