AN: International is mostly acting as a dumping ground for the Hetalia one-shots running around in my head. I'm going to do my best to string them all together in a somewhat coherent plot involving international relations and the bonds (or lack thereof) of our favorite nations. I think I'm mostly going to be focusing on Japan/Kiku Honda, China/Yao Wang, and America/Alfred F. Jones. Just 'cause those three are my favorites (though not necessarily in that order) and I love them all to death. ^^ Others are going to be in the story though, of course.
But, just so everything's clear, I HAVE NO IDEA HOW POLITICS WORK AND HARDLY ANY GRASP ON THE CURRENT STATE OF WORLD AFFAIRS. Any reference made to current events or government is just my best interpretation, and I don't mean to offend. For this reason, I'm largely going to stay away from that stuff if possible.
Oh, and I don't own Hetalia either, just in case you were wondering. ^^
Meeting of the World
To most people, it was a slightly cloudy, fairly breezy, late-summer day in New York City that was notable for nothing at all. Except for the sudden and unexpected influx of official-looking and somewhat foreign-sounding people. All headed to the New York City UN building. It was a complete surprise that had the media curious. Several news groups had already broadcast reports about a large total of United Nations representatives (because what else could they be when they were all heading to the UN building?) having gathered in New York unexpectedly. No one seemed to know anything other than the fact that they were representatives of nations.
The media didn't know how literally right they were.
To the government leaders of the world, it was a day of phone calls, messages, and headaches as they suddenly realized that their nations, living representations of their countries, had all gone off and disappeared from their homes. When it was discovered that every one of them had packed up and bought plane tickets to New York City of the USA, international threats and questions (more of the former than the latter) had suddenly calmed down for all of five minutes while leaders argued with their advisers, before it all abruptly grew even more hectic than before.
The White House fielded at least a dozen calls demanding to know what was happening in New York before an international video conference was set up. The President of the United States of America, at his desk in the Oval Office, was doing his best to appear calm and serious through the oncoming migraine of frustration. He put a professional expression on his face and squared his shoulders, taking a deep breath. He let it out slowly.
The little light on the webcam blinked green, multiple live videos of people appeared on screen, and the President of the United States looked directly into the lens.
"Why is-"
"-New York of all places-"
"We demand to know-"
"-happened? Concern-"
The President held up his hands in a gesture of peace. The questions and accusations died down to let him reply, and reply he did. "I don't know any more than you do. All that I can confirm is that the countries of the world have gathered in New York City for a surprise summit. One of their 'World Conferences'. Only this one hasn't been scheduled. Given the distance between them that has arisen between them this past decade, it's even more surprising."
An exasperated expression flitted across his face and he said with a frown. "I'm pretty sure that Alfred, America, that is, has something to do with this though."
There was a pause of silence, and then the leader of China spoke. "How you know this?"
The others nodded, agreeing with the question.
The President, having expected the very same question, tapped a button on the keyboard. His image on the video conference was replaced by a video pause screen. He clicked, and it began playing.
[VIDEO PLAY]
A female newscaster with short, dark hair and a grey suit on sat behind a wooden desk. The camera was on her face.
"A sudden and unexpected influx of foreign government officials has occurred here in New York. They are all headed to the UN building for some sort of meeting, which they call a 'World Conference' or a 'Meeting of the World'. Interviews with several national representatives reveal little besides conspiracy, as you will see."
-o-o-o-
A shakier, lower-quality cut of footage appeared and replaced the newcaster's stream.
An Asian man in a dark suit and grey tie stood at a straight-backed posture, with his arms held stiffly at his side. His black hair was cut in something similar to a bowl-style, and his bangs were slightly side-swept. The UN building was in the background. It was Japan. He had a nervous expression on his face, and a slight, panicked tremble and stutter accompanied his accented words.
"I-I don't think- that is, I'm not allowed to s-say. Ah, the World Conference, we are... ah, having emergency - no, it is surprise Meeting of the World."
An offscreen reporter asked. "What's the 'Meeting of the World', Mr. Honda? You say it's the same thing as this 'World Conference'. What's the purpose of this meeting? Why haven't we heard of it before? This is a complete surprise!"
"I-, ah, I-... Thank you for your time, I must be going now. Goodbye!" He hurriedly bowed, grabbed a briefcase from offscreen, and then turned around to rush towards the UN building with a cloud of dust trailing behind him.
-o-o-o-
The footage changed again, to a higher quality video with a female reporter and a blond-haired man in a blue suit.
"Ahonhon!" He chuckled. It was obvious that he was French. "Cherie, I, Francis Bonnefoy, am here to represent France at the World Conference. It came as a spur of the moment kind of thing, no? But of course, we representatives of the G8 approved it. Nothing gets past us, moi especially."
"Who suggested this 'World Conference' event? Why haven't we heard of this before, Mr. Bonnefoy? And who are you new representatives? No one's heard of you before!" The reporter held a microphone out to France for his answer.
He replied while twirling a strand of hair around a finger, enjoying every moment of attention. "Well, the Conference notion was put forward by mon ami Alfred Jones years ago. He is the... representative of your country at the Meetings of the World. And please, mademoiselle, call me Francis."
He winked flirtatiously at the reporter, much to her annoyance. "Once again, Francis, I'd like to know why we've never heard of this World Conference. And when you say 'Meetings of the World' do you mean to imply that there have been more of these gatherings in the past that no one knew about?"
"We~ell... There have been meetings in the past." France said, slightly nervous now. He tried to do a bit of damage control, which really just made things worse. "We usually have these annually, but this one is a surprise summit arranged by Alfred, oui. We are discussing approval for another proposal of his, and I, for one, am looking forward to it. I have relations with England that could be helped along-"
The French representative was interrupted with a smack to the back of his head from a short, thick-eyebrowed man in military-green who rushed on-screen.
"Shut it, Frog!" The blond newcomer shouted with a heavy English accent. Then, he turned to the reporter and the camera crew. "And sod off, you bloody vultures! If we want to answer your bloody questions, we'll have a bloody press conference!"
He grabbed 'Francis Bonnefoy' by the ear and dragged him towards the UN building in the background.
-o-o-o-
A blond-haired man in a beret and military uniform was stalking towards the UN building, holding something in front of him against his chest, though what it was wasn't visible from behind. The camera wobbled shakily as the cameraman and another reporter on-screen kept moving to follow him.
"Excuse me, sir! We'd like to know why you and the other representatives are here!" The reporter called out.
The man stopped abruptly and spun around, revealing what appeared to be a rifle in his hands. The camera's viewpoint suddenly backtracked, though the reporter dared to go closer. A response was shouted with an irritated expression.
"I'm here because I'm the representative of Switzerland at the World Conference. I don't know why it's happening off schedule, I'm not naming myself or other representatives, and I'm not telling you what it is. I'm licensed to carry this in fifteen countries and I have diplomatic immunity, so scat!"
He pumped the barrel of his rifle.
[VIDEO END]
Swizterland's leader sweat-dropped at the expressions on the others' faces and shrugged. "You all know as well as I do that we can't control our nations."
The President of the USA sighed as his image came back onscreen with the end of the video. "I think the best course of action is to just wait until the nations come back to their homes and ask them then. Are we all in agreement?"
"Hai."
"Yes."
"Oui."
"Da."
"Muy bien."
The many sections of the screen blacked out one by one as everyone agreed. The President sighed, and reached for a bottle of aspirin.
Meanwhile, in a large meeting room at the UN building, almost every country invited had arrived and taken a seat at a long table. At the head of the table, nearest the speaking podium and microphone, were the G8 minus Canada and plus China. In short, the old Axis and Allies teams. For old enemies and long-time frenemies, they were actually fairly peaceful. Actually, they were unusually, unexpectedly peaceful.
Seated in the middle of the old WWII group were America and Germany. Germany was silent, stiff, and stoic as always. What was surprising was the fact that America was acting the same. Albeit with a small grin and a super-sized cup of soda-pop. On Germany's other side, of course, was Italy. Rather than singing about pasta, though, the nation was scribbling pasta recipes on a few sheets of paper. On the other side of Italy was England, and on the other side of England was France. However, despite their history and their encounter outside the building, neither was arguing. Instead, France was leafing through a magazine while England surfed the internet on an iPhone.
On the other side of America, Japan was hunched over a notebook with a pencil in hand, rapidly working on a doujinshi. Sitting on Japan's other side was China, sitting straight-backed and formal in his chair, though he did have on a pair of headphones connected to a music player. To China's left was Russia, who simply sat there in his thick overcoat and scarf, doing nothing in particular. Besides smiling, which had gained him more elbow room already.
The rest of the room was filled with chatter as old acquaintances found each other and spoke. It was loud and lively, though not nearly as much as it was ten years ago. More formal and official nowadays. Korea wasn't claiming inventions, the Europeans weren't at each other's throats, and Switzerland had only threatened to bludgeon two countries with his peace prize. Prussia wasn't even in the air vents.
A digital watch changed to read 11:00. America stood up and cheerfully announced. "Welcome to the surprise awesome World Conference, fellow countries! Just sit down and pay attention, and we can get started!"
The nations complied immediately.
Germany came to a sudden realization. 'This isn't right.' He thought to himself. 'Usually, we use several air horns, firecrackers, or America lifts and slams the table to get a meeting started. Even if everyone is curious as to what this is about (I know I am...), things shouldn't calm so quickly. They never did ten years ago... Ten years ago... We were all so close then. Have we really become so distant?'
His thoughts were interrupted by America stepping up to the podium. The young nation spoke with his usual happy tone. "Alright, I bet you're all wondering why I called an emergency summit. Am I right?"
There were murmurs of assent and much nodding, along with one shout of "Get on with it!"
"Well, it's because we have an emergency." The smile dropped off of his face and America's expression suddenly turned serious. Everyone was suddenly paying more attention. Probably because things had to be really bad if America of all people was being serious.
The host of the conference continued. "We have an emergency, and it's been happening for the past ten years. We aren't talking to each other anymore. It started slowly, but it's been growing, and it's gotten to be a big, fat issue. I noticed it five years ago, on this day, but I thought it would blow over. Obviously, it hasn't!" At the skeptical expressions he met with, America asked. "Have any of you noticed? Do you know what could happen if you have? I bet Germany does."
At the prompt, Germany stood. He himself was slightly uncertain and more than a little disturbed by the fact that he hadn't realized until that very day (not that he'd admit it). He wouldn't admit it though, and spoke with a stern expression and firm voice. "I've noticed. And looking at this, it is very possible that alliances and trade will eventually fall apart. If that happens, a nation could take advantage and build another empire before they could be stopped."
He sat back down.
Nervous glances from every corner of the room were directed at Russia, who merely blinked in surprise at the revelation.
America took the spotlight again. "Yes, that could happen. And a lot of friendships could be broken. But right now, we can fix things before they get bad- if we get out of the shells we've built ourselves."
Poland raised his elegantly manicured hand and shouted. "What the heck do you mean by shells? I think we're perfectly sociable!"
There was a large murmur of assent.
"I think I mean a lot of things, Poland." America said determinedly. He began listing. "Your crossdressing and Twitter account."
Poland lowered his hand.
"Britain's extreme Doctor Who obsession."
England stiffened.
"France's tabloid problem."
France hid a magazine behind his back and tried to look nonchalant.
"Japan's doujinshi. Especially that Hetalia thing he's publishing."
Japan, startled, dropped his notebook on the floor.
"Russia's snow garden."
Russia merely blinked again.
"Italy's recipe issue."
Italy let go of his pencil.
"China's new pop music fetish."
China tucked a music player away in one of his overly long sleeves.
"Switzerland's border OCD- you know what, he's always been like that with the neutrality thing, never mind."
Switzerland picked up his rifle again and looked pointedly in America's direction.
America continued. "Anyway, the point is, over the past ten years we've all just stopped talking to each other and gotten wrapped up in our own hobbies. Not to say that they're bad, they're just taking over our lives a little. Some countries, like me and Germany, seem to be fine, but I think we all need to be more social with each other again! Just hang out and stuff, like we used to! We'll have monthly meetings to check up on everything!"
Spain raised his hand and said. "So, basically, amigo, you're staging an intervention?"
"Yup!" Was the happy-go-lucky reply.
Very few nations resisted the urge to face-palm.
AN: I apologize for the pure ludicrousy that is this first chapter. I really needed a reason for everyone to be stuck hanging out with each other more often and have more frequent summits. This was the best I could come up with. Plus, this way, I get to give little quirks to everyone! ^^
I also apologize for any political incorrectness or offense I might have caused. Though what you're doing on Hetalia fanfiction if you're easily offended is beyond me, moron.