"Hey guys – did you save the world and all that?" Flash was as always bored sick of monitor duty, so when Superman and Batman returned from their mission in lower orbit, he was immediately all over them. They didn't answer him though. Instead they were bickering:
"You do not take it out of the cruiser until we have examined it more thoroughly. And that is the end of that."
Batman seemed upset while inspecting the edge of his cape.
"Oh, come on! He was just scared to begin with. I'm sure he'll behave if we just help him out a little." But Superman was silenced when Batman showed him the damage to his uniform. Something had torn his cape completely apart, including the Kevlar, steel wires and electrical charges. He waved it violently in Superman's face while stating: "No! Absolutely not! We can afford a new cruiser, not a new watchtower."
"He needed something to chew on to calm down."
"Yes", Batman said desperately – "and that something was me!"
"What's going on?" Flash asked still hungry for excitement.
"We found a space-dog!" Superman proclaimed with the joy of a child.
"A space-being in the shape of a dog" Batman corrected him, still looking intensely at the damages done to his attire.
"He is just a strong dog. There is nothing to worry about" Superman insisted, but Batman wasn't budging.
"That thing is almost as strong as you. We know nothing about it, except that it is aggressive, uncontrollable and of course-"
"Such a good boy!" Green Lantern yelled from behind in a funny, cheerful voice. Next to him was a white dog of an unknown race with friendly eyes and a long pink tongue. It barked once of pure joy and excitement when GL rubbed it behind the ears. "Hey guys. Looked what I found out in the hanger!"
Flash rushed over to pet it as well, and even though Superman turned around to do the same, Batman grabbed his arm to hold him back. He angrily yelled:
"Lantern – we have no idea what the thing is or what it might be able to do. Put it back in security at once!"
"Oh, relax, B! I deal with alien creatures all the time, and none of them are as friendly and cuddly as this one. Or as good a doggy." He kneeled down besides the creature and ruffled its chins. "Now, who's a good doggy?"
"Looks can be deceiving" Batman maintained as Superman pulled free of his grasp.
"Don't worry," Lantern said again as Flash took over the petting of their new friend, "my ring examined it thoroughly and it is not a shapeshifter, and it doesn't have any known diseases or infections. Most of all it looks like the Kryptonian version of a house pet."
"I told you!" Clark said happily. "I thought I recognized it from the scriptures."
"Wow, a superdog!" Flash figured. "I wonder what it can do…"
"Ruin this entire satellite." Batman proclaimed in his usual dark tone "And I will not have anything to do with it. If the three of you insist upon compromising our base, I will not stand here to watch it happen." But as soon as Batman turned around to walk away, the dog took off from the ground and flew right into his legs. He fell down, and as soon as he rolled over on his back to protect himself, the creature began licking his face.
"He likes you!" Flash stated while Green Lantern tried to suppress a laugh. The big bad Batman forced to the ground by a house pet – who would have figured! An alien Kryptonian house pet, but still.
"Get this thing off of me!" Batman yelled while wrestling with the dog, who obviously thought they were playing a game, never allowing the caped crusader to get up.
Superman went over to help. He took a good grip in the loose skin on the dog's neck and lifted it gently.
"Don't worry, Batman. He can come live with me at the Fortress. It will only be nice to have a Kryptonian friend around."
Batman got up and dried his face off with the back of his arm. He looked more discontent than usual when he hurried in to his own quarters.
"Jesus," Flash added. "I guess we won't see a Batdog around any time soon!"