Five times Jeff talked to his mom about Annie
June 2010
Doreen Winger wanted this phone call to end well. Then again, her son had just finally admitted he was a fake lawyer, and had attended community college for the last year. And she only called him out after a phone call from his dean, who seemed very worried that Jeff hadn't contacted him all summer.
But now that Jeff confessed the truth – something Doreen thought he told her until today – she wanted to talk about something other than her disappointment. "So, do you at least have friends at this Greendale? Or a girlfriend?" Doreen asked. "I don't think you want to pile on more lies, Jeffrey."
Doreen bit her tongue as Jeff sighed and admitted, "Yes, I have friends, Mom. It'd take me a week to explain them to you. Normally I'd like being on the phone for a week. But I can't play my games while talking to you."
"I hope not. Well, what about girlfriends, then?" Doreen asked again.
"There's this one girl I've got a thing with. Even Greendale hasn't ruined my power with the ladies," Jeff bragged and Doreen hoped he could feel her rolling her eyes. "Her name's Britta, she loves needling me within an inch of my life, and she hates not looking like the savior of Mother Earth. Probably more than she loves being a savior of Mother Earth. But she has her successful moments."
"Well, she seems like a dedicated do-gooder. It sounds like you need that in your life," Doreen needled before she caught herself. She didn't want to keep harping on sour notes – but after finding out just how imperfect her son was, what else could she do?
"Well….it's not like she's the only female do-gooder I know," Jeff continued. "This one actually does more good, though. Without even trying as much."
"Does she now? And who is she?" Doreen asked.
"Her name's Annie, she's….just a couple years younger than me. That makes her more naïve and innocent, but that doesn't make her helpless. I mean, you should see the things she can do with her eyes! I can't tell you how many things they dragged me into!" Jeff said with annoyance – but with a bit of humor.
"Well, what else can you tell me about her?" Doreen wondered, intrigued.
"She's really high strung and hyper, so that's a drawback. She does crazy things just to keep us together, which can be really annoying. But she did it because she's so scared of not having friends, since we're the first ones she's ever had. I mean, she shouldn't make us suffer for it! But I guess for people like her who've been all alone, and who need people….and deserve them, really….it makes sense," Jeff concluded before adding, "I hope her parents make her feel appreciated, at least."
"You do?" Doreen checked, now very curious.
"Well, she should be," Jeff kept going. "She's brilliant, she's our only real studier, she's fun when she's not trying too hard, and she's just as devious as me! When she learns how to be good at it, she'll rule the world in about 15 years!"
But that wasn't all, as Jeff added, "We underestimate her a lot. But the truth is, she's more capable and insightful and gutsy than people twice her age. And she's almost never relaxed, but she has the widest, brightest smile when she is. Combine that with her eyes, what her cardigans show off, and how her hair looks when it's down….and how infectious her happiness is when she hugs you….well, it's hot, what can I say?"
"You said a lot, Jeffrey," Doreen noted. "And you barely said anything about this girl you have 'a thing' with. But with this girl, you just went on and on…..and you said things I've never ever heard from you. Are you sure you don't have a thing with her too? And that it's not just a thing?"
Doreen half expected Jeff to lie, now that she knew how much he could lie to her. But instead, Jeff said, "I've gotta go, Mom," and hung up. That was better than lying, she supposed.
Then again, the tone he used to describe this Annie sounded pretty truthful. Even more real than in those times he probably wasn't lying to her – probably.
December 2010
"Are you sure you can't visit for Christmas?" Doreen asked again over the phone. "You don't have cases to work on, and Greendale's on winter break now," she reminded, hoping this deflected any potential lies. She'd gotten better at weeding them out, yet she wanted to take a break from that on the holidays.
"I know, Mom, But I really have places I need to be this time," Jeff voiced. "We're pretending we're still…..no, you're not ready to hear about Greendale stuff yet. No matter how much you think you are, you're really not. You can still trust me on that."
"Is that why I haven't met your school friends yet?" Doreen waited, then felt brave enough to add, "Or that girl you have a thing with?"
"Trust me, Britta's not the 'meet the parent' kind of girl," Jeff assured.
"I wasn't talking about Britta," Doreen informed. "Do you need to hide Annie from me because of the age difference? Your school's website already gave away that she's 'a few years younger' indeed."
"Mom! Invasion of privacy much?" Jeff scrambled to say. "Besides, it didn't work out! I mean, there was nothing to work out! There was nothing that should have been worked out!"
"So you say," Doreen used her newfound skepticism.
"I'm serious! We've barely talked this semester! And it's been rough when we have!" Jeff revealed. "But she got nuts and wanted things I couldn't give her, so what else could I do?"
"Did you tell her that? If you did, I'm sure she'd understand. She certainly sounds smart enough to understand," Doreen noted.
"But she isn't, not in that way! She doesn't know how the world works, or how people like me work! There's no point reasoning with that, so why bother talking? It just ruins things, and enough things are ruined for me already!" Jeff reasoned.
"I guess I understand, Jeff. I mean, I remember how naïve I was when I was young. If I wasn't like that, then I guess you'd have never been born," Doreen pointed out. "And I never got on pills and had a mental breakdown in high school. And I never became an accomplished honor student again anyway. By your logic, does that mean I knew how the world worked or not?"
"Freaking Internet…." Jeff muttered, which made Doreen chuckle.
"Yes, it does tell me things that my son won't," Doreen needled. "It also told me she's done and overcome more things than most 40 year olds. That's impressive no matter how old she is."
"It is. It really is," Jeff admitted.
"Maybe it's for the best. With her resume, and the pictures I've seen of her online, she must have a mob of suitors after her," Doreen predicted.
"She's not like that, you have no idea what she's like!" Jeff blurted out. Before Doreen could practice her newfound scolding tone, he backtracked and said, "I've gotta go, Mom," and hung up. Well, so much for a new Winger family Christmas, then.
April 2011
"It's all your fault! You made me like this!" Jeff drunkenly informed Doreen over the phone at 1 a.m.
"What? Jeffrey, what is this?" Doreen got out in her confusion.
"Why'd you tell me I was so great when I'm not? I'm not great, Mom! I tell people they're delusional and see things in their head when they're not, so how great am I? But that's why she can't be with me! I'm saving her, so lying's good this time! Isn't it?" Jeff completely rambled.
"How can I know anything when you're like this?" Doreen wanted to know. "What happened, honey?"
"I told her there's no Annie of it All. She found out I slept with Britta all year, and then I tell her that. What kind of asshole does that? Me, ding ding ding!" Jeff slurred.
"Jeffrey!" Doreen tried not to scold too hard while he was drunk – and probably wouldn't remember anyway. So she merely asked, "Why are you telling me this?"
"I can't tell Dad! Pierce made me think I could, but he lied! So there's just you! You made me love myself too much, and Dad made me hate myself too much! Together you made me the jackass who broke Annie's heart for good!" Jeff congratulated. "It was rough doing that all year! Now I gotta live through it for two more? Thanks a lot, you and me!"
"Jeffrey….have you considered talking to Annie when you're sober? About how you really feel?" Doreen offered.
"I feel nothing! I can't, I'm Jeff Winger! That should make me happy, but it doesn't anymore! Not after seeing sad Annie eyes!" Jeff lamented. "But what choice do I have? I say there's no Annie of it All, I break her heart! I do, then she loves me, then I just break her heart in a few more months! How am I supposed to get over that? I can't! You don't get over Annie, it can't be done!"
Doreen just stayed on the line as Jeff got drunk sad and continued, "If I was just a jackass, this wouldn't bother me. But she doesn't make me feel like a jackass….except when I'm hurting her so she doesn't know how I feel. I'd know how I feel if you or Dad did….something different. Wouldn't I? What do I do, Mom?"
"I wish I knew, baby," Doreen almost sobbed. "I've been trying to figure that out for a year. If I'm not enough to help you….maybe you should go to a psychiatrist. If Annie's really out of the question."
She waited with quiet tears, then heard Jeff say, "I gotta go, Mom," again. Yet this time, he added, "I'm sorry. Sober me won't remember this, so I'm sorry for him too." He then hung up, ensuring that Doreen wouldn't forget this – especially after a sleepless night.
September 2012
"Jeffrey…." Doreen said, almost breathless over the phone. "Are….are you sure this is what you want?"
"I don't know if I want to. But I probably have to. If not now, when?" Jeff explained why he wanted his father's last known address. "The website didn't help me find him, and I'm sure he's long gone from his old homes. But maybe there's a clue in them somewhere, right?"
"It stands to reason, I suppose," a still stunned Doreen said. "Did you get the idea from therapy?"
"No. Well, not official therapy. Greendale therapy did the job," Jeff answered, which made Doreen chuckle. By now, she knew full well what kind of 'therapy' Greendale gave him, even if she still hadn't seen it for herself.
"Besides, my last year's starting soon. I kind of want to start on a high note. I know I don't want to end it on a bad one," Jeff admitted. "If I stop my issues with him from wrecking my last year with them, it's worth it. Isn't it?"
"I think so if you do," Doreen replied with a rapidly swelling heart.
"I'm starting to. I mean, even I can take a hint. I can't just shake off my issues with someone who abandoned me. Not like…." Jeff stopped in place.
"Like what? Or who?" Doreen zeroed in.
After a while, Jeff answered, "Did I tell you about how Annie's parents abandoned her?"
"You've told me a lot more things lately, but I would have remembered that," Doreen informed.
"Well, her dad did it first when she was younger, go figure. Then when she had her pill meltdown, her mom cut her off. Not for being an addict, mind you, but for going to rehab and letting people know about it. Her mom wanted it swept under the rug, so when she didn't get that, she settled for never talking to her daughter again," Jeff explained.
"Jesus, what kind of mother does…." Doreen stopped before her anger got away from her. She calmed down and regrouped herself with, "She told you all this?"
"Actually, I heard it from other sources," Jeff revealed, almost sounding disappointed. "Anyway, the point is she got dumped by two psycho parents, and look at her! She hasn't let her issues ruin her and make her less than awesome! And on the other end, there's me. As always."
"Jeffrey, don't make yourself look that bad," Doreen hoped. "If she's really that good at it, you could ask for her help. Don't let her find out from other sources." She then dared to joke, "Despite your ages, it sounds like she's who you want to be when you grow up. Well, you're clearly growing up now, Jeffrey. She should see how much."
Doreen heard a sigh from Jeff, followed by, "You know, for all these changes, she doesn't look at me like she used to. Not as much, anyway. Not like the big hero she thought I was. But she's gotten so formidable and grown up, you have no idea! All after she stopped being hung up on me."
"Well, isn't that what you wanted? For her to stop being naïve about you? So this is good, right?" Doreen checked, though she knew the answer even before Jeff didn't give one. She then asked, "But she doesn't hate you, right?"
"Of course not! She still gives me…..memorable smiles every so often. They're just not as wide eyed or lovey-dovey," Jeff recounted.
"Maybe she knows better than to idealize you now. But maybe she can still care about you anyway," Doreen figured. "Knowing all of a person, not blocking out the bad parts and still finding something real there….it's taken me a while to do that. It sounds like Annie's figured that out faster than any Winger."
"She figures out everything faster than anyone," Jeff admitted. "But I can't bother her with this. I can't let her last year get off to a rough start too. In case it brings back bad memories, or if it's just too stressful to care about me."
"It may be, but it's worth it. If she doesn't know it the way you want her to know, then tell her. After all, it is your last year," Doreen reminded.
"I can't be like that with her now. I don't even know if she wants that! She probably doesn't," Jeff predicted. "And I can't be anything with her, or anyone else, unless I settle this nonsense with him. It's….it's just time, that's all. So can you give me his addresses?"
"Yes, I can," Doreen assured, deciding to drop the Annie side of this. She could have finally told him about drunk Jeff's little confessions – and not just that one time – but he had enough on his plate right now.
March 2013
"It's still amazing to me. After all those vacations you took on spring break, coming home is your big spring break vacation now," Doreen reflected.
"Yeah, I'm old now, thanks for the reminder. The super young girlfriend didn't give me enough of those," Jeff answered over the phone – albeit with a little playfulness on the age issue for once. Facing his dad and having a girlfriend for three months really did a number on him. "But Annie would rather meet you than go on spring break parties, so I guess that makes her old too."
"She seems far from a spring break party girl, so it's not just me," Doreen corrected.
"Not really. She got all her school work, grad school research and other projects done extra early, just for you. So she'd have no distractions before she met you tomorrow. She's really taking this seriously, but you know how she is. Despite how you've never met her," Jeff pointed out.
"It feels like I've met her already," Doreen seemed to joke. But Jeff didn't know how little she was really joking. Maybe it'd be safe to bring it up tomorrow, if Annie was okay with it – although perhaps it was too much for a first meeting in person.
And one time she talked to Annie about Jeff
September 2012
When Annie saw her phone ringing, she didn't recognize the number on the caller ID. No name came up either, which made her extra curious. But she took a chance and answered, "Hello?"
"Annie? Is this Annie Edison?" an older female voice said.
"Yes….this is she. How did you get my number?" Annie asked curiously.
"I asked your dean to give me your contact information. Once I e-mailed him pictures of my son, he sang pretty quickly," the voice disclosed.
"Oh, that's disturbing on a few levels. I thought he'd only do that stuff when it came to….a friend of mine," Annie covered up.
"My son Jeffrey, yes," the voice revealed. And suddenly, the voice wasn't mysterious to Annie anymore. But it did get more terrifying.
"Oh God, you're….you're Mrs…." Annie stammered as she sat on her bed, in lue of falling on the floor. "Why, why are you calling me?" She then gasped out, "Oh my God, is Jeff okay? Did something happen to him?!"
"Oh my, no, he's fine!" the voice – a.k.a. Mrs. Winger – actually laughed off. "I'm calling to talk to you. I've never talked to Jeff's Greendale friends, so I wanted to start before you went back to school."
Annie exhaled at Jeff being okay, then worried anew over Jeff's mom calling….and already knowing who she was. "Jeff talks to you about us? About me?" she almost squeaked out.
"It took him a while, as you can imagine. But I have a good idea about you, Britta, Troy, Abed, Shirley and Pierce now. I even have disturbing details about Chang, Leonard and Rich," Mrs. Winger disclosed, making Annie blush for good and embarrassing reasons.
"But I only want to talk to you," Mrs. Winger chilled Annie, despite her less than chilly tone. She then went even further and asked, "Are you still in love with my son?"
"What?!" Annie almost choked on nothing. "No, I'm not, I swear! I'm not some crazy schoolgirl, if that's what he made you think! Of course that's what he'd say, even to his own mother! Even if I was!"
She soon calmed down and remembered who she was rambling to. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Winger, I….I don't know what I'm sorry for. I don't know what I should say, actually. I shouldn't give you the wrong idea about your son, though!"
"I've had my share of wrong ideas about my son. The fact I even know about Greendale proves it," Mrs. Winger noted. "I want you to be open with me. This is one Winger who can handle that. So tell me, what do you feel about him?"
Annie took time to work out what she wanted to say, and what she could say. She barely sorted this out herself and stopped hoping to work it out with Jeff, so how could she do it for his mother? And without making him look too bad?
"I thought I loved him once. But he was right to say it was in my head," Annie winced, due to bad memories and perhaps revealing too much. Yet she went on with, "I just loved the idea of loving someone like him. But I've learned better now. I had to if I was going to grow up."
"So you've stopped caring for him at all?" Mrs. Winger asked. In that instant, the mere notion set off something in Annie.
"That is not true!" Annie exclaimed, but not in the stuttering, nervous tone she had earlier. This was formidable Annie at work now. "Okay, I might have given up on him as a boyfriend. But he's still my friend, and I will always care about him! He might even be my best friend!"
"Even after all your troubles with him?" Mrs. Winger pressed further.
"Mrs. Winger, I don't know what he's told you, or what you think he is now," Annie still went on formidably. "But although he's….disappointing sometimes, he's still a good man. You should have seen how good he was a few weeks ago! I've seen him at his best and worst for three years, and I promise you, his best is far more powerful! And I won't abandon him when he's at his worst! I'm not his dad! No matter what he tells himself, he isn't either!"
Once her fluster and her natural need to defend Jeff wore off, Annie hoped she didn't go too far. "I'm sorry for yelling, Mrs. Winger. I get too passionate sometimes, that's all," she excused.
"It's perfectly all right. It really is," Annie heard her answer in an almost warm way. Hearing that from a mother, any mother, was.…odd. "I needed to make sure you'd look after him, but it sounds like you've got it covered."
"Why would I need to look after him?" Annie nitpicked, her suspicion taking over. "Is something actually wrong?"
"Not like that, no. It's just….this is his last year over there, as you know. And I'm sure you know how he's been coming to terms with himself, who he is and who he was. I imagine this year will be difficult for him in a number of ways. And he'll need more people than me to see him through it," Mrs. Winger predicted.
"Well, we do the best we can with him. When he lets us," Annie filled in.
"Don't let him scare you away, then. I know he's tried before." Mrs. Winger sighed and continued, "I know he makes it difficult to help him. But no matter how he blocks you out, or no matter how much he deflects….please don't let him push you away."
"Why would he do that? This time?" Annie inquired.
"I don't know, it's probably just a mother's paranoia. It makes me fear what he'd face before he leaves that school. Or before he becomes what he really wants to be. Even if he can't accept he could want it, or earn it," Mrs. Winger teased. "It would ease my fears to know no matter what's coming, there's someone who won't give up on him. No matter how much he makes it look like he wants you to."
Annie felt the weight of her request, and some of what it truly meant. But she was still cautious enough to deflect, "Mrs. Winger, he has the six craziest, most loyal friends he could ever ask for. Or reluctantly have thrust upon him," she added with a giggle. "We won't let him down now."
"And what about just you?" Mrs. Winger got to the point.
"Like I said, I'm not totally giving up on him," Annie repeated. "I've never had real friends this long before. I don't think he has either. If it's up to me, we won't lose them this year or any other. Not that I'd go way overboard to make that happen! Not again…." she almost revealed too much.
"That's about what I expected to hear. I'm just glad I could finally hear it from you," Mrs. Winger praised.
"This is too weird," Annie took in. "I have so many more questions. So many really juicy questions," she added, now giddy at the prospect of getting dirt on young Jeff.
"There'll be plenty of time for that," Mrs. Winger assured.
"Why, do I have to give you weekly updates on him?" Annie inquired.
"No, I just needed this one. Now that I know he'll be okay, I'll leave him to you. No need to tell him I bothered you or anything. Just do whatever you can for him….on the off chance he needs it. He might not, but a mother worries, you know," Mrs. Winger covered up.
"I don't know about moms worrying like that," Annie remembered.
"Oh damn it, of course. I'm sorry to make you remember that," Mrs. Winger apologized.
"No, no that's all right," Annie replied, having nothing better to say. She was just astonished that Jeff's mom knew anything about it – most likely from Jeff. What else did he tell her about? Why would he tell her anything like that about Annie, anyway?
There were those too many questions again. But if Annie asked them all, she'd be on the line all day – and Troy or Abed or even Jeff might notice eventually. Best not to overwhelm her – it would be a fine thanks for all the trust she placed in her.
Yet she did find a better way to thank her. "Jeff's lucky to have someone who cares this much about him. He should have had so much more of it. But I'm sure that buried, deep down goodness he had all along came from you. I mean, who else could it have been?"
She brushed aside the joke and finished, "So on behalf of all of us and all of Greendale….thank you." For good measure, Annie let herself add, "That goes for me too, Mrs. Winger. If he never said any of that, then I will. Heck, even if he did, I stand by it."
Annie didn't hear anything, so she thought she went overboard. Yet she soon heard what sounded like a sniffle, although maybe it was the reception. Then she heard, "You are so much more than welcome, Annie. More than you know right now. And please, call me Doreen when we meet in person."
She hung up before Annie could figure out what she meant – or face the likely answer. Yet six months later, she did just what Doreen said.