So since songfics are banned from FF I had to remove the lyrics. It reads just fine without them but I personally believe they add more depth and intensity to the fic. So I suggest readers read the full fic on my tumblr under Creative Ideas (my username is celeskid) or at the very least listen to the song before or while reading. Also you can note there's other ideas on that page as well and if you want something written or made let me know and it's more (way more) likely to happen.

Warnings: Blood, Violence, Torture

This is nothing but Kaito!whump. I'm sorry but not really.

Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan or Magic Kaito

It was silent; even the breeze chilling the room swept by unheard. Before she could hear the rustling of his cape, but he'd sat down now, hands clenched in his lap, his messy brown hair veiling his eyes as he bit his lower lip. She starred up into the starry sky, remembering the night of her birthday - the skyscraper with her name, the fireworks. She recalled all his pranks in school, the incessant teasing, and attempts to make her smile. She'd known she supposed, deep within her heart, and when he'd disappeared she'd somehow accepted it. Tears stung at the corners of her eyes, a mixture of fear and betrayal. She gently unclenched her fists from the light blue dress, inhaling deeply and then exhaling in a relaxing manner. She turned around, slightly taken aback by his downcast, ashamed form so different from the normally cheerful, mischievous boy she knew. "Kaito," she called softly. "AokoI," he started rambling again, and she held up a hand to silence him. His indigo eyes looked timidly into her sapphires. "Slow. Start from the beginning. I'll listen. Just, please... why?" She couldn't keep the hurt out of her voice even as she saw the guilt eating away at her best friend.

"Aoko I," he breathed, slower, before looking away again, trembling. There were tears in his eyes too, she observed, although from his frightened babbling she could only guess at why. Something about his father she'd surmised; she knew it was somewhat a rough subject: He adored the man, striving to be just like him, but she was aware of how much his father's death affected him and how much he tried to hide that fact. She placed a hand on his shoulder and tilted his head up. "It's okay," she reassured tenderly. "I-I want to understand. So please, tell me."

"I, I, was, Tantei-ku, the detectives," he stumbled, "we were..." He stopped himself, taking a deep breath. "The detectives and I, we have a common enemy, and I was working with them." "Detectives?" she questioned. "Kudo-kun, Hattori-kun, and Hakuba," Kaito quickly explained and Aoko nodded, waiting for him to continue. "This organization, Aoko they've killed thousands. Their methods, how they've managed to stay undiscovered, it's sick, and they killed, they were the ones who..." Tears were streaming down his face now, and he was shaking worse than before. She pulled him to her chest, wrapping her arms around him, and after a moment he did the same. "I'm sorry Aoko," he mumbled into her shoulder. "For lying, for your father, for disappearing like that." She listened soundlessly, stroking his hair comfortingly. The sleeve of her blue dress was already soaked, saltwater dripping down her arm. He shifted to look her in the face. "This syndicate, it's larger than we thought, but I think, I think at least now, you're safe."

She let that sink in as he unclipped his cape and shrugged off the jacket. So he lied to protect her? - or at least that's what he believes. She swallowed, but then who would protect him? "When KID reappeared, the first few heists were Jii trying to lure out Otosan's murderers," Kaito restarted. "It was after we'd been talking about KID at school that I discovered KID's room in my house and decided to confront the imposter. I was... I was trying to draw them out," he admitted, and Aoko's breath caught. "At the Blue Birthday heist they confronted me, and after that sometimes they'd show up and sometimes they wouldn't." Blue Birthday, Aoko reminisced. She recalled the melancholy mood after everyone left, her frustration and anger at Kaito for being late. He'd been late because he was facing murderers? "I don't know if you'll believe me, but the organization, they're after immorality, a jewel called Pandora said to grant such and... even if you hate me for it, I have to keep being KID and destroy it."

Everything was quiet again. Kaito was still trembling in her arms as she starred at the purplish discoloration on his neck. She shifted Kaito so she could unbutton KID's blue shirt resulting in a startled "what?" from said thief. She lost the stomach within a couple buttons as the bruise darkened and another one became visible, instead lying her head on his shoulder, defeated. She felt the way his body shook, heard his stifled wince as she touched the mark. Tears pooled in her eyes once more. "I forgive you," she murmured, hearing Kaito's startled intake of breath. "Don't misunderstand, I'm still mad at you for lying to me, but if this is really what you believe... then okay. Kaito, just, please," Aoko choked. "Please don't die," she sobbed, tightly gripping his shirt. There was another moment of silence as Kaito seriously considered her words. "Okay," he eventually responded. "I won't."

His cape fluttered delicately in the breeze while he landed on the rooftop just as swiftly as the hundreds of times before. He adorned his signature smirk when Nakamori-san confronted him, the thief's carefree, smug smile saying nothing could stop him. KID lifted the jewel to the moonlight, watching it shimmer through before tossing it to Aoko's father with a resigned sigh. Nothing. He attached his hang glider, balancing on the edge of the roof as the officers charged at him. Arms outstretched, head tilted back, laughing like he was invincible as gravity dragged him to the earth. It was a facade. Last time he'd spread his ivory wings, pitch lead had slashed through the fabric, spiraling him to his demise. Don't die, she'd said. He activated the glider, and soon after touched safely upon the moist ground. I won't Aoko, he reaffirmed.

Kaito settled on the edge of the roof, gently tucking the jewel into his chest pocket. Still no luck. Heists were no fun anymore: Not without his tanteis chasing him and even Aoko screaming in his ear at the end of the night. Everything was melancholy now. He sighed dolefully, the wind sweeping his hair into his eyes when he heard a click. His body froze, breath catching as he turned around to see the bulky, dark clothes of his father's murderer. He plastered a confused smile on his face, but his features darkened. "Oh, you? I thought you were arrested?" Snake returned him a predatory grin. "I escaped," he stated like that explained everything. "Time for you to die," the assassin sneered, pointing the gun directly at KID's heart like always. Kaito tensed, prepared to dodge and run except another bullet swished through the air from behind, piercing straight through. Wide-eyed, he collapsed in his pooling blood. Snake pulled Kaito up harshly by his messy brown hair, and proceeded to beat him mercilessly.

His vision was a blue and black haze, each blow just another crunching noise to further his aching body. He crawled with a slopping wet sound from his cape along the chilled concrete, trying to get away from the incessant torment only to be dragged back. He could hear his own ragged breathing, the pounding of his heart in his ears. His head spun, sight blackening some of the time. Sparks suddenly flashed across his vision, a spherical cloud knocking the black mass out of range. "KID! KID!" a panicked voice called. He coughed in relief when another blow didn't fall on him, blood amalgamated saliva splattering the ground beside the crimson pools. He curled in on himself, vision blank. "I think it's time to sleep now," he thought tiredly.

Don't die, her voice rang in his ears. Please don't die. Had he broken his promise then? He clenched his fists, gritted his teeth, a metallic taste coated his mouth. No. This wasn't the end. With weakened, aching muscles he pushed himself upwards, then fell backwards from an abrupt wave of dizziness. Someone caught him from behind still shouting distorted messages that the kaitou couldn't comprehend. He clenched and unclenched his fists shakily, feeling cooled liquid on his palm. He focused on evening his erratic, short breaths. His blurry vision cleared slightly allowing him to make out Tantei-kun and Hakuba's silhouettes. He wouldn't give up - No, he realized. He had to stop.

Beep. Beep. Beep. Ahh, Kaito recognized this. The sound of a hospital monitor. Had he really been here that many times? Last thing he remembered was desperately fighting to stay conscious when the paramedics injected him with a substance intended to have just the opposite effect. He glanced about tiredly, body still burning in pain. Same dull, white, sterile, boring, hospital room as ever, Kaito grumbled to himself. Kami-sama he hated hospitals. He shifted slightly, trying and failing to sit up, a brown mop of hair falling onto his hand. "A-Aoko?" he yelped, startled. She lifted her head with her mussed up hair, yawning and wiping sleep out of her eyes. "Kaito," she responded to his voice sleepily. "Kaito!" She rushed to the very end of the bed, cupping his cheek. "Kaito," she breathed again, this time in relief. "Aok-," Kaito tried to reply only to be interrupted by a flash of stinging pain on the same cheek. "Ao-ko," he whined in protest, whimpering. "Don't you ever do that again!" she snarled, "or I swear I'll kill you myself!" She starred into Kaito's royal blue eyes as he nodded timidly. She kissed him softly on the lips creating a brilliant crimson glow on Kaito's slapped face; then she sighed, climbing onto the hospital bed and laying beside him. She leaned her head on his shoulder and he rested his head on her's. He would stop, he promised himself.

At least that's what he'd said, he thought bitterly as he slipped yet another jewel into his chest pocket. Another jewel that was NOT the one he was looking for. Aoko was mad at him for this and had every right to be so. He peered off the edge of the roof, starring into the thousands of feet of darkness below. His mind tugged him every direction - stop, don't stop, for her, for you - and he'd be lying if he said it didn't hurt. The earpiece picked up a soft swishing sound through the air, and Kaito instinctively dodged, a projectile cracking the tiles right beside his feet. He glanced up in alarm as another sliced through his top hat so moonlight shone through it. With a slight stumble to his step, he scrambled away from the rooftop, dashing down the stairs with a hop, casting aside his KID costume, and in a split second decision, leaving his thieving life behind.

With the constant danger surrounding him diminished and aside the intense guilt that followed, he and Aoko started dating. It was a new adrenaline rush than jumping off buildings and starring down 45s, less raw and consuming, more intimidating and jittery. It was worth it, he thought at first, with her lying in his lap so he could play with her hair as they starred at the moon. She even let him take her hang gliding much to his surprise and glee. However, the truth of it was his father's murder and the atrocity of the organization haunted the corners of his mind, crushing him. Was this really the right decision? He'd be awake for nights on end with a pounding headache from the ambiguity of it all, then fall asleep at the most random times of the day. His insomnia had not gone unnoticed by Aoko, and she questioned if this was what he really wanted, if it really was for the best: Yet, he always insisted things remain how they are. Because when he did dream, it was about the organization capturing them both, shooting and stabbing and slashing them with Aoko lying in a pond of her own blood and tears streaming down Kaito's face.

It had been over a year. KID's brilliant white cape billowed in the wind as he starred over the top of the roof. The wind sighed remorsefully in his ear, no longer rustling his hair playfully like it used to as Kaito shrugged further into his coat, head down. Who was he really doing this for... Aoko or himself? Was he really protecting her as he claimed or could she handle herself on her own as she asserted? Wasn't it because he was afraid, afraid to lose her, afraid to see her hurt? Hadn't the reason he hid everything from her besides the shame and guilt and fear of rejection was because he was afraid of getting her hurt? Wasn't that hypocritical? The wind's pitch had increased, howling, restless. "Kaito?" a deceivingly quiet voice carried with it. He turned around to see Aoko in his face, glowering at him. "There you are Bakaito!" she screeched in his ear. "Ahouko don't shout, you'll make everyone go deaf with that raspy voice of yours," he grinned teasingly before getting a nice whack on the head with her mop which she had up here for who knows why. She crossed her arms, rolled her eyes, snorting. "I came looking for you to tell you it's time to go home and go to bed," she choose her words carefully, immediately sparking Kaito's perverted side with a lecherous grin. "But now I'm reconsidering it," she tilted her head up, smug. "Oi, oi wait Aoko. I'm sorry. I'll come down, just give me a minute." Aoko glared at him suspiciously before nodding. Kaito starred into the abyss one more time. Kami-sama, what was he doing?

Kaito gripped the phone hard enough to cause it to crack, face pale, quivering. Meitantei's voice was cool and collected as he relayed the information: The organization knows KID's real name. The detectives didn't know how it had happened since Kaito had stopped being KID, but their operations had been unsuccessful for quite some time now. "Kaito," Aoko's girly tone floated into the room, marked with concern. "Are you alright?" "Aoko, I..." he shuddered, his vivid dreams flashing before him. "I'm sorry," he hiccupped. "Kaito?" she questioned in confusion. "I'msorry," he blurted out. "Forlyingformessingwithyourdadfor-forbeingsohypocr iticaland-alwaysgettinghurtand-and, for... for, not being, able, to... protect you," he choked out. "Kaito, what?" she asked, stunned. "I know this already and I... forgave you, remember?" she questioned, tilting his head up with her index finger. "Why are you telling me this?" Kaito took a deep breath, still shaking. "I've been found out, and I, I don't know what to do."

Aoko's eyes widened as Kaito tread to the drawer, setting his card gun down and pulling out a real handgun, his eyes cold and hardened. He grit his teeth, clenching his fist around the weapon. "Kaito?" she questioned cautiously. She slipped behind him, gripping his waist, and prying the gun from his fingers. With a light tug she convinced him to sit back on the ground, intertwining his quavering fingers with her own. "I can't, lose-you," he shuddered , and she gripped him tighter, kissing the back of his neck gently. "I can't. I'm not strong enough Aoko," he confessed with a shiver. "And I'm, I'm scared." She crawled around to face him, holding his cheeks between her hands and wiping the tears from his eyes. "I know Kaito," she responded with a strong voice. "Believe me I know," she muttered with a slight acrid edge. "But don't," she answered, aware how much it would ruin him. Even so her mind swirled with images of him unconscious and hospitalized. "Not unless you really have to."

Kaito inhaled deeply, regaining control of himself. With tears still lingering in his eyes, he starred up at her. "May-maybe you should go live with your dad, or the detectives or-or..." he sputtered. Aoko kissed him to quiet him. "You want me to leave?" she simplified, trying to keep the hurt out of her voice. He looked away, nodding bashfully. There was a moment of pause, and Kaito shifted uncomfortably. "Okay," she conceded after a moment. "For you." She stood up, pulling him up with her. "I'm heading to bed. Please don't be long," she kissed him on the cheek. "It's late. We'll figure it out tomorrow, okay?" she called from the hallway before disappearing around the corner. He swallowed nervously, grabbing the real gun and disappearing it in a poof of smoke. After a moment he picked up his card gun, reflecting upon it for all its sentimental value. He dropped his arm, leaning against the wall, sobbing quietly to himself, and then angry minutes later for causing this and for being so weak. He slipped into the bed, allowing Aoko to wrap him in her arms while he spent all night starring at the door, shaking at the vivid images streaming across his mind.

Kaito opened the door to their house, feeling forlorn without Aoko to greet him or rather hit him on the head. He slipped his phone from his sleeve, scrolling to her number, and calling for the fifth time that day. He was trying to not do the abusive boyfriend thing even though she said she didn't mind, that she'd answer his calls as soon as she could, that she understood. His incessant paranoia resulted in him constantly texting her: Where are you? Who are you with? How's your father? The phone rang and... "Hi you've reached Aoko. Leave Aoko a message and Aoko will get back to you soon!" he heard her sweet voice with her ridiculous third person. He sighed, dropping the phone back down his sleeve. It's okay, he calmed himself, inhaling deeply. Relax. The home phone rang. He froze, wide-eyed, and picked up the receiver with an unsteady hand. "Kaitou KID. Or should I say Kuroba Kaito," Snake's voice sneered, and Kaito had to grasp his torso as his stomach lurched, leaning against the counter for support. "I-I'll be there," he whispered shakily, as Snake finished his proposal, sinking to the floor crying.

Kaito dashed up the skyscraper's stairs, the muscles of his neck contracting as he swallowed anxiously. He flung the door open to the rooftop, the harsh screeching wind smacking into him with icy rain. "Aoko!" he shouted as he saw her within Snake's tight grasp, a hand clasped over her mouth, a gun to her head. Kaito grit his teeth as she stared at him fearfully. The thief's hard glare met Snake's murderous eyes under the top hat and monocle, the assassin's mustache upturned with his sneer. Kaito took one step forward and was instantly surrounded by goons training firearms on him. He froze, snarling. "Kaitou KID," the black-clothed man responded leisurely. "As we discussed, you come with us or she dies," he reminded, pressing the gun harshly against Aoko's temple for emphasis, causing her to wince. Next thing Kaito registered, Snake was howling in pain as Aoko bit his hand, trying to run toward him but being stopped by the circle of guns. "Kaito no!" she managed. Next thing he knew red was staining his white shoes.

His mind blanked, tears streamed down his face as he fell to his knees, desperately grabbling at her limp body. "No, no, no, NO, NO!" he screamed, chanted, anguished. Any thoughts he had of dropping a flash bomb, creating a diversion were swept from his mind by his bewildered denial of what had just happened. "She's still alive," he heard from behind, turning around to gape at the assassin tearfully. "The wound is non-fatal. Come with us and we'll allow her to live." The thief stood up slowly only to be immediately seized by Snake's men. He put up no resistance, just stared longingly into those cold-blooded eyes. "You'll leave her alone?" he begged. "Only if you do exactly as we say," came the gruff reply. He watched the blood run trails on the concrete, nodding submissively, his vision blurring into darkness as cloth was placed over his mouth.

Another scream tore through the air, high-pitched and intermixed with shameless begging. He could still feel the blood streaming down his torso as a third cracking sound resounded throughout the dull, cold, concrete room. Why- why were they doing this to him? In revenge? Punishment? What did they want? He hiccupped the question. A brass fist to the side was all the response he received. His voice grew hoarse, electricity surged through him. "Listen Kid," he heard amidst his hazed mind and he couldn't tell if the man was addressing him by his alter ego or his age. "You work for us now." There was a pause to let that sink in. "If you betray us, if you disobey," the malice in the man's voice made Kaito shiver. The assassin turned the dial up, KID's cries heightening with it. The man gripped the teen's jaw, jerking it roughly, and whispering in his ear, "we'll do what we've been doing to you. To that pretty girl you like. Ten times worse." The thought alone was enough to send Kaito hyperventilating, full out panicking, all control he had dissipating. Nonononononono, was his only coherent thought. No matter what, he couldn't go against them.

The wind whistled, cape flowing around him as he peered over the rooftop to the depths below - like always. Most days he wondered what would happen if he simply fell, let go, ended it all, but no one's safety was guaranteed, he couldn't risk it. He wasn't a good guy anymore, well as good as a thief can get. He couldn't return the jewels. He still tried his best to help people where he could, but working for a moralless organization had the addition of sometimes being indirectly involved with the slaughter of hundreds. His insides twisted upon themselves at the thought but the scars remained, a reminder, that he is powerless, and rebellion will only hurt those he cares for. Those he wants to protect. Aoko. He balled his fists. The public seemed to have figured out he was being controlled; Nakamori had quit questioning him; the detective's eventually left him alone, after all they understood the need to protect someone. And that was the ultimatum: He was alone and helpless.

"Where is it?" the man screeched, enraged, gripping KID by his blue shirt and throwing him harshly against the wall. The boy squirmed as a knife carved a line into his skin. "Are you forgetting the price for disobedience?!" "Heh," Kaito coughed, blood dripping down his lip. "I sent it away and I don't know where it is. It doesn't matter if you use others against me, I can't change that fact. It'll probably be destroyed before either you or I can find it again." He closed his eyes as the man kicked his torso, barely aware of the pained sounds coming from his own mouth. He only hoped Akako could find a way to destroy the immorality-granting jewel forever and keep herself concealed from the organization. He yelped in surprise as he was kicked down a flight of stairs only to be picked up and thrown down another flight. He felt the inflamed agony in his leg more than he heard the crack. His leg was broken, there was no way he was getting away. He was a dead man. I'm sorry Aoko, he thought as the man tossed him through a window, the shards slashing into his skin. Another torturer clinked her high heels into his sprawled-on-the-ground vision, and lashed a whip on his curled up form. In the end though, on the brink of consciousness, it seemed the detective's were able to save him from certain death once again.

Aoko lightly touched the portrait of Kuroba Toichi Kaito had insisted upon instilling in their house. She balled her hands gently, setting her forehead against the painting, sighing lonesomely as she wondered what things would be like if his father was still alive. Would all this have happened? The click of the door startled her out of her thoughts, and she tensed nervously having promised Kaito she'd stay safe even if he couldn't return that promise. Her breath caught as she saw the messy brown hair and violet eyes of her best friend and lover leaning against the door frame, looking at her with love and happiness. "I'm home," he sing-songed. She ran up to him, helping steady his trembling frame. His left foot was lifted and encased in a blue cast as he leaned upon crutches to support himself, and there was a brace on his right arm. He was covered in bandages from head to toe, spiraling around his arms and disappearing under his shirt, wrapped around his neck and forehead while band aids covered the wounds on his face. She tangled her hands into his soft hair, pulling him towards her and kissing him passionately. "Never leave me," she asked, tears in her eyes. He gazed upon her with a smile as playful and compassionate as always. "Hai, never," he promised and kissed her back.