A/N: So I haven't written Star Wars fic in a VERY long time, so bear with me while I get my feet wet. I just couldn't resist adding my 2 cents to the new universe with a little ReyLo shipping. Don't worry, Sherlock fans. I'm not abandoning those stories. I've really just had so many paid deadlines that I haven't been able to update those stories in a while. As always, I own nothing. Just playing in other people's sandboxes for a bit.

"Oh, it's evil babe, the way you let your grace enrapture me. When well you know I'd be insane, to ever let that dirty game recapture me." - Fiona Apple, "Shadowboxer"

"Go away." Rey shuddered as she felt that peculiar prickling along the back of her neck that always accompanied these little communiques. She snapped her fingers, turning the lights off and drowning herself in shadow.

"You say that like I have any control over this whatsoever." Rey turned and saw the familiar face of Ben Solo. In her mind, he would always be Ben, not the dreaded Jedi Killer Kylo Ren. What a silly name. Spacey, or maybe like someone's dog. These thoughts swirled, keeping the fear and exhilaration of seeing him at bay.

"Isn't that your… thing? Ultimate control of the Force?" She rolled her eyes and threw her vest aside. It hadn't been a good day and she wasn't really in the mood for games.

"Only in knowing that I have no control."

"How very philosophical, Ben." Rey sat down on the makeshift palette and let the Force slide around her like a warm blanket. The more she focused, the more distinct his outline became until it was as if he were sitting with her in the room.

"I wish you wouldn't call me that," he said.

"Then what should I call you? Supreme Leader? You aren't my supreme leader."

"Of course I am. You and your scum friends just exist in a state of extreme denial."

"My scum friends? Including your mother."

"I'd rather not talk about my mother, if you don't mind." Rey noticed a slight twitch in the corner of his left eye. It was a tic she'd noticed before when talking about the General.

"I'd rather not talk at all," Rey snapped. "I keep thinking that if maybe I ignore you, that eventually this… whatever it is… will go away."

"You hate me that much?"

What could she possibly say to that? Of course she didn't, but to say it out loud would make the emotional turmoil she was feeling too real. "I don't exactly hate you. Not that I don't have plenty of reason."

"Oh? What have I ever done to you except let you escape and save your life?"

Rey gasped. "Let me? You let me go?"

"You burned my face with a lightsaber," he said, ignoring her arguments.

"I don't think you ever let me go. And you saved my life that one time. Once."

"There might be a permanent scar."

Rey's reply died on her lips as she turned her gaze to his. There was something strange. His jaw was usually fixed in an angry rictus and his mouth set in a hard line, but for a fleeting moment, Rey was convinced that she saw a mischievous sparkle in his dark eyes that were usually so full of angry fire. "Are you making a joke?"

"Why? Hear something funny?" One corner of his mouth twitched slightly, but his eyes were full of mirth and before she could stop herself, Rey laughed. At first he could only stare. As if the vision of someone laughing because of something he'd said was incomprehensible. Was he truly so damaged that even a laugh was foreign? Then suddenly, he was laughing too.

"Are you… are you laughing?" Rey said through her giggling.

"Of course not."

"I didn't even know you had teeth."

This only made them laugh harder. Rey could feel the stress of the day falling from her shoulders as she slipped into this accidental, comfortable conversation with this person who should be her mortal enemy. She blushed, thinking that his deep, growling laughter was the most beautiful music she'd ever heard. She really hoped that he was too distracted to read her thoughts. When they were connected this way, everything was on the surface and easily seen.

"I do a lot of things that… others do."

"Oh really?" Rey asked, narrowing her eyes. "There's a list I'd like to see."

"You're that interested?"

"Shouldn't I be? And since you obviously aren't going away…"

"I thought you didn't exactly hate me."

"Doesn't mean I can't be interested."

He nodded and stared down at his hands. She noticed for the first time that he was sitting, looking strangely casual in his black tunic and loose pants. Rey was silently grateful. She was uncomfortable seeing him in any state of undress. She wasn't exactly sure why, only that it gave her the strangest feeling in the pit of her stomach. A feeling that returned sometimes when she was alone in the dark.

"So what other things?"

"What?"

"What other things do you do? What do you like? Using the bones of your enemies to pick your teeth? Building new and interestingly shaped lightsabers?"

He shrugged. "I suppose I like you. I'm not sure why and I've done everything I can to stop myself."

Rey smiled. "I'm a likeable person. Everyone says so."

"Everyone? Like your friend the traitor stormtrooper? Or perhaps the dark-eyed pilot that reminds you so much of my father."

"Poe doesn't remind me of your father…"

"Why do you bother lying? You know I can see it. Besides, I know you don't have friends. Not really. None of them really know you."

Rey felt a lump in her throat. "That's mean. Take it back."

"I'm a monster, remember. I reserve the right to be mean. And I didn't mean any offense. Only that you hide yourself away, never revealing your most intimate thoughts."

"I thought we were talking about you," Rey said.

"I'd rather talk about you."

"I'm not telling you anything about me. Besides, I thought you knew it all anyway." Rey's smile died away and she stared down at the floor, cataloguing every line and chink. The words, his words, rang in her head. "You are nothing." She'd heard them so many times, echoing in the shadows while she lay wide awake. "Not that there's much to know, right?"

"Not everything. Searching your mind is exhausting. And I'd prefer to hear it from you."

"Why?"

"It challenges me," Ben said, standing. Rey couldn't help but be fascinated by the way his body moved under the tunic. "Watching you for any sign of a lie. Or the truth."

"So what do you see?"

He paused and she could feel a tickle at her temple. He was focusing. If she resisted, the tickle would begin to burn and then throb until finally it would feel as if her skull, and then her body, were being torn apart from the inside. "You're angry with me. But not for the usual reasons. Something you think is trivial… I hurt you."

"You can't hurt me," she said, turning away completely now. "Nothing you say can upset me."

"I find that hard to believe," he chuckled. "It seems everything I say upsets you."

"I'm not nothing," she said finally. "I may come from nothing, but I'm not nothing."

He started to speak again, but stopped short. For a moment, he looked like a fish out of water, opening and closing his mouth, gasping for air. Rey could feel that he was surprised and searching for the right words. "I didn't mean… I didn't mean that you were nothing. Only that you shouldn't keep holding out hope for a lie."

"It was a cruel thing to say," she said, hating herself for the tears she could feel burning at the corners of her eyes.

"Isn't it kinder to tell you the truth?"

"Not like that."

Ben sighed and shook his head. "I didn't exactly have time to break it to you gently, Rey." He pushed a stray lock of hair away from his eye. "Look, you aren't at fault for being left behind. I can feel the guilt, still lingering even when you know the truth. You have nothing to feel guilty about. They abandoned you there, Rey. And it doesn't matter who they were—junk traders, smugglers… or princesses. They didn't give a shit about you, so you don't owe them anything."

"Are you talking about me or yourself?"

"Both of us, I guess. I'm sure you've figured out by now that you and I are two sides of the same coin."

"I am nothing like you."

"Yes you are. That's why you hate me so much. Everything you keep deep down inside, I wear it proudly."

"Not proudly," Rey snapped, wiping the tears away from her eyes. "I can look inside you too, you know. And what I feel isn't pride. You have guilt and hate and sadness. Fear. Fear that you're too far gone to ever go back. Fear that you're weak. Fear that you're everything Snoke said you were."

"Do you believe that?"

Rey considered his question. She'd seen both sides of him. The ruthless, murdering savage, Kylo Ren, and the merciful, protective, and sad Ben Solo. She could feel that despite all that had happened, he was still conflicted. His love for his mother was still there. One didn't need The Force to see that. But there was something else, something darker but not necessarily bad, that held him back. "I thought I did. And sometimes I hate you so much."

"Only sometimes?"

"Other times I… I feel like you're the only person in the world that knows me. I've always felt so alone. Even among my friends, I feel apart. I suppose that's why I'm still here. The only time I don't feel this profound loneliness is when I'm with you."

Ben didn't reply, but Rey ventured to guess he felt the same. She'd felt it in the throne room. He'd been so desperate for her to stay. And if she were being honest with herself, it broke her heart to say no. It wasn't some great moral crossroads with choosing power. Rey couldn't care less about power. It was him. She hadn't wanted to leave him. "Do you ever think about that night in the throne room?" she asked.

"Sometimes."

"It was awful, but also beautiful. Don't you think? I felt like we were one person. Every move I made was a perfect compliment to yours. Strange."

"Not really," Ben replied. "Snoke warned me that there would be another. An opposite. The light rising up to meet the dark. Superstitious fuck."

This time Rey burst into nervous laughter. Not only that his words were so far out of character, but the way he'd spoken the final word. Just the way his mouth moved, had sent a bolt of lightning straight to her center. Once there it radiated a pleasant heat so acute that she nearly groaned aloud. Her mouth was a desert and her cheeks flared. "You have a way with words when you aren't hiding behind a mask."

"I meant what I said to you that night." Rey's laughter died away when her eyes met his. Once more they darkened and the fire inside them flared. She considered peering into his thoughts, but thought better of it. It would be a violation.

"You're not nothing to me. Never to me."