"Can you show me again?" Natsu whispered " I don't think I see it up there."
He kept his voice low, a lightness to it that floated over the noises in the trees behind them and the fire's weak crackling as it started to wind down for the night, it's warm orange glow receding as cold, silvery moonlight took its place.
Lucy glanced at him, a pause in her stories about the starry sky to meet his innocent question. Easily she grabbed his hand and tugged it up, following her low sweeping motions with a silly grin as she carved out a piece of the sky.
"There, that one's Cygnus. The celestial bird that flies across the heavens and it always points south." Lucy scrunched up her nose, lowering their hands back after the constellation was outlined. "There's more to it but I don't think we should get into that. It's weird."
Natsu chuckled, bouncing her with his shoulder softly, reaching up to slowly unwrap his scarf. It pooled in his lap and draped messily over Happy who- despite being swaddled up in his blanket- still shivered at the chill in his sleep. "You're weird too, since you love 'em so much."
Soundlessly he tucked his scarf around the exceed, waiting until he stopped shivering to look back at Lucy who'd raised a slightly concerned brow.
"He'll be fine, just needs some rest is all." And Lucy nodded, scratching absently at one of Happy's ears and leaning into Natsu.
He really did, he had a rough time today after all. These days nothing much happened and everything just boiled down to 3 things- travel, eat, sleep, travel eat sleep- over and over again. But scouring continents for a rare golden key was bound to be arduous, and at times, hopeless. Yet still they'd trudged on.
There were a few setbacks here and there, thieves, rogue wyverns too far south to be normal, fear of locomotives (thank you Natsu) and days like this where Happy took one for the team and whisked them both away from danger.
Lucy hummed softly, trying to soak up more of Natsu's warmth as the fire sank lower. There was a slight chill in her bones after her dip in the icy river. It was only after her bid to get clean did she remember who she was travelling with and how he could've helped.
Despite everything though, she couldn't find it in herself to stressed, or even tired. There was no deadline, no drastic consequences, no horrible fate to befall her in the end. Just only a single goal in sight that she refuses to let slip past her.
"There was one up there that Igneel taught me." He murmured, gently pulling Lucy's hand up to point towards a small cluster of stars twinkling at her from just above the treetops.
"I think he called it 'the great draco', or something. Said that even though it was so little it was the spirit of the first dragon ever lived watching over us." Natsu's nose wrinkled and a whine keened in the back of his throat. "Said that it come back one day and haunt me if I didn't stop misbehaving." Natsu said grouchily, rubbing at his bare neck. "As if it'd come back for something like that…."
"I dunno if it's a real one, but it's the only one up there I remember he taught me."
With a groan he leaned back, carefully propped up on his elbows with something in his eyes that Lucy couldn't quite place as his head cocked slightly to the side, watching the sky intently.
He hadn't….spoken much of Igneel since his passing. And Lucy could understand why, the memory too fresh and the wound just not quite yet healed enough for it to be called a scar.
And the guilt.
The guilt that gnawed at him since that day and heavily dragged his shoulders down during their moments of rest. He could never be rid of it completely, always there enough to remind him even though he knew better.
Lucy sighed, drawing a leg up to her chest. She understood perfectly, having her own weights to bear when she was left alone too long with her thoughts. There was nothing to be done of them but to bear and to help each other bear the load.
Lucy squeezed her leg, fingers digging into her skin as they sat in silence. She still hadn't told him. Her bag rested heavily by her foot, it's weight a grim reminder.
"Natsu…" She started, voice coming out weaker than she intended but his head still swivelled her way, a question in his glance.
" I, I have something that belongs to you. I've had it since the war and I- I didn't know when was a good time to give it to you…" She turned away from him, fumbling wih the straps of her pack with shaky fingers. Finally she pulled the flap open taking into her hands an old tome held delicately and, almost fearfully despite its strong leather bindings that kept it together for so many years.
She gnawed at her bottom lip, teeth digging into the skin until she swore she tasted the copper taste of blood on her tongue.
Natsu sat up, shifting behind her and rested a comforting hand on Lucy's shoulder. "Lucy? What is it?"
She took a heavy breath and turned back to him, expression a mix of so many things as she glanced from the book and back to him. Fear, sorrow, regret, apprehension, all pulled together as she continued to gnaw on her lip. Natsu stiffened, hand clamped on her shoulder.
"I rewrote it to save you but your life is still attached to it. I shouldn't be to one to keep holding onto it. It's yours so, take it.'
Lucy kept her eyes on him expectantly but his dropped warily to it, the burn on its cover marred the title emblazoned across it and seemed to taunt him. Phantom pains sliced through his chest, still fresh as he remembered how Zeref had attacked him, toying with his life.
Hesitantly, he placed a hand on it, on his life, and fearfully marvelled at how fragile it seemed beneath his palm. The sturdy leather wrinkled with age but not cracked as his hand roamed curiously over it, still clutched in Lucy's grasp as she waited for him to take it.
This was him, him in his simplest form. The 'him' that only she knew. Natsu pursed his lips, hand drifting over to cover hers and pushed it back at Lucy.
"You keep it." Natsu said firmly with a small nod. It took her a few seconds to process it, her mouth falling into a soft 'o' before she realized what he was doing.
"Natsu, I can't! This, this is yours! Take it!" Lucy tried to push back but his hand was firm, keeping it pressed close to her chest.
"You keep it." He repeated, releasing her shoulder to settle his second hand atop hers. Natsu squeezed Lucy's hands before letting go, a watery smile on his lips when she stuttered in disbelief.
"But Natsu this is your life." Lucy protested.
"And I'm trusting you with it." Natsu shot back. He rumbled out something she couldn't understand and slouched, a low sigh leaving him.
"I trust you with my life, so there's no reason why you shouldn't be the one to hold onto it." He murmured. "I know you can keep it safer than I ever will."
"But….." Lucy started and trailed off, seeing the steely resolve in his tired eyes. She gulped and nodded, leaning back on him with the book clutched tightly to her chest with one hand and the other finding his to tangle with.
"I understand, and I promise to always look after you."
"Thank you." Natsu breathed softly. He drooped his head on her shoulder strands of pink hair tickling at her throat. Happy stirred in Natsu's lap but did not wake.
"And Natsu?" She whispered, looking back at the sky. The fire was all but cold cinders now. "Yeah?"
"For what it's worth, I trust you with my life too." She squeezed his hand reassuringly and he buried his nose in her shoulder, lips pressed against her skin.
"I know, and I promise to always look after you too."