"I have already joined myself in marriage to a husband, namely the kingdom of England"

Queen Elizabeth I to Parliament.

Right now no one at the UN conference was getting any work done, they were too busy watching the spectacle in front of them. Germany had even officially dissolved the meeting for today in despair at anything being done.

America had to say he actually felt sorry for Russia. Now this was something rather out of the ordinary for Alfred didn't tend to see eye to eye with the other man. Why, Ivan couldn't just see that a nation as great as himself, America, should be the Hero and be emulated by all the other world countries he just couldn't understand. Still anyone with a crazy-stalker-sister like Ivan's had to be pitied. Although oddly enough it wasn't be fight he really felt like being the hero in. Still duty calls.

"Do you think he needs help?"

"America you are an idiot, of course he needs help you git but if you're planning to get in Belarus's way then you're an even bigger idiot than I thought you were." Responded a rather irritated England wondering not for the first time how he had managed to raise the boy with no sense of self-preservation.

"I think it's rather sad really" Offered Austria as input "Natalia doesn't understand that a relationship needs space, I mean when I was married to Elizaveta I let her have all the time away she wanted, I didn't try to impose my customs on her or anything."

"And you and Hungary divorced, I hardly see you as the poster couple for marital bliss. Still there is some truth in what you say, it certainly worked for me during mine, time on the high seas washed away most annoyances"

"I blame that on the war" the other nation.

Meanwhile Alfred looked on in confusion, Iggy was married? When had that happened? Who too? Alfred couldn't remember any unions with other countries, sure he'd had his empire but he seemed to adopt them as siblings. Officially Arthur was the United Kingdom but he had been England when he had first meet Alfred and many of the other nations called him this, perhaps it was one of the other nations of the UK Iggy was involved with, but he thought Iggy had called them his brothers and while they were nations and such things weren't set (he had his suspicions about those german "brothers") it didn't seem quite right. Eventually he turned to the nation who had somehow ended up next to him. Even though the other nation tended to annoy him he was quite sure France would know this type of thing.

"France?"

"Oui, call me Francis mon cher"

"Who is England married to?"

"Was, mon cher,was,"

America looked blank.

"Angleterre was married not is married, mais que is this has little Angleterre not told you? No? Well I shall have to remedy that." He raised his voice "Our dear Angleterre here is one of the very few, perhaps the only country to have married his boss"

"What?!"

"Bloody Hell frog, you make it sound perverted" Arthur yelled having heard Francis's words.

"And it wasn't?"

"No!" Arthur spluttered "and you're one to talk with your dear Jeanne"

"You'd know about that Angleterre, wouldn't you, is that why you killed her like you did? Were you jealous?"

Alfred had by this point given up trying to get any sense out of either of them. Even he could see he wasn't going to get anything out of the other two anytime soon.

"I wish they wouldn't fight" an extraordinarily quiet and easy to miss voice said or rather whispered next to him. As he turned to see Canada, for that is who it was (although it was difficult to see how such a quiet nation could be his brother, Alfred always thought Canada should be more like him) Alfred had a thought. Matthew had gained his independence later than Alfred, perhaps he knew British history?

"Mattie, do you know who Iggy was married to?"

"Perhaps you should ask him yourself"

"Nah, he'd jus snap at me"

Feeling rather uncomfortable as he rather thought that Arthur should be the one to tell his brother something and not him he suggested perhaps that Alfred should and look it up somewhere, maybe in a history book.

Scowling Alfred got rather annoyed, Iggy's marriage was well known enough to be in history books, yet he, the hero didn't know about it?!

Leaving the conference room, Alfred got out his laptop, there was no way someone as awesome as him had the time to look things up in some fuddy-duddy text book the internet was how a modern American should do things. Opening up Google he typed in "marriage England" only to get a host of results on how, where and when you could get married in England which while interesting was not what his was looking for. Still, a hero never gave up and trying again he typed "England married to" which came up with an article titled "Married to England" bingo!

America read through the article with growing disquiet, this woman wasn't worth Iggy, Virginia had been wrongly named! Although Alfred was very confused, he'd thought Elisabeth was the name of Iggy's current Queen. Wait, what if it Iggy had done some strange thing with his magic and brought her back to life or something. That might explain the strange lack of love towards a real princess that England's royal family had shown, if they were his, Iggy wasn't great with his emotions. Alfred needed to find out more, be the hero and rescue Iggy from this spell. Although first he had a state to rename.

Back in the conference room, Arthur suddenly realised something, "Where's America?"

A/N: Something I found a while ago I decided to post, I think I was a bit sleepy when writing it so it's possibly a bit odd but hopefully it came out ok. My 1st attempt at writing hetalia.