"Man is largely a creature of habit, and many of his activities are more or less automatic reflexes from the stimuli of his environment."
-G. Stanley Hall
Creatures of Habit
First Profile: The Tomboy With Your Name On It
Ranma was a creature of habit, used to following the same routine every morning. Wake up, get out of bed, wash up, brush his teeth, go back to his bedroom, brush his hair, do a last-minute check on his homework and then put on his uniform before he went downstairs to have breakfast. It was only after he'd taken the uniform out of his closet that he realized that one, he didn't own a boy's uniform, two, that he was in fact about to put on a girl's uniform, and three, that this wasn't how he spent his mornings at all.
"What the hell?" Ranma thought. After a second, he shrugged and put on his usual red and black silk clothes. Walking out the room, he could swear they felt strange on his body: somehow stiff and constricting, even though they were made of silk and fit him like a glove. Ranma put those thoughts out of his mind as he smelled the comforting aroma of breakfast.
Ranma sleepily walked down the stairs and sat down at the table, happy to be there just as Kasumi served breakfast. He picked up a steaming mug of tea and was contentedly drinking when the nagging feeling returned.
"Feels like I forgot about somethin' or like something's supposed ta be..."
"Kiyaaa!" a loud female yell came from the garden which was immediately followed by a splash. Ranma turned to find Akane, in a dingy white dogi, righting herself in the air as she landed on a large rock adjacent to the koi pond, "Got you good that time, Mr. Saotome!" Akane yelled, her voice full of excitement with just a hint of arrogance.
"Growf," was Genma's terse reply.
Realization dawned on Ranma: he'd completely skipped out on morning practice. "Aww jeez, Pops, why'd you let me sleep in like that?"
Genma, sitting down at the table and enjoying his morning cup of tea, held up a sign. "It's no matter, boy, though your laziness is quite shameful. Akane gave me an excellent workout today."
"Wait, Akane did? Seriously?" Ranma asked incredulously.
Another sign. "I'm as surprised as you are, but she is a student of Anything Goes, so you should respect her skills."
Ranma shrugged, returning to his food. "Whatever. It just means you're getting rusty, Pops." He reached for the ricecooker to serve himself up a bowl of rice, only to have the paddle snatched from his hands by Akane, who heaped on what was her second bowl. "Wow, grabby much? You better watch it Akane or that'll make you blow up even more than usual."
Akane scowled across the table at him around a mouthful of food, then stopped and started to chew slower, but only with effort. "I got a good workout this morning, Ranma," she said, after she finished swallowing, "and it made me hungry. And who are you to talk about..." she trailed off, watching Ranma eat his food politely before continuing, "manners?"
Akane sat there, dumbfounded, as Ranma finished his meal, calmly stood and said, in an upsettingly lilting voice "I'm off, Kasumi. Don't wanna be late for school."
"Oh, see you later, Ranma." Kasumi replied, smiling sweetly. Ranma stood and walked over to Kasumi, giving her a warm brotherly hug, before running out the door. Akane and Genma's jaws dropped, their chopsticks clattering against the tatami floor.
Ranma kept tugging at the shoulders of his shirt as he walked down the street. "Jeez... feels like I'm wearin' an itchy wool sweater."
He paused to fix the belt in his pants. Suddenly, a splash of water flew in front of him. Its source was the old washer woman, doing her morning uchimizu, wooden bucket and ladle in hand.
"Woah, got lucky today," Ranma said to himself, smiling as he made his way to class.
As he entered the gates of Furinkan, Ranma noted he was half an hour early. As a result, Kuno was nowhere in sight. Instead, mumbling to himself by the school gate, was Hikaru Gosunkugi. He looked pale, gaunt, and tired: same as always. He seemed to be poring over a parchment scroll, wiping sweat from his brow.
"Good morning, Hikaru. Watcha doin'?" Ranma asked.
"Not now Saotome, I- Saotome! I, uh... I need to go to... the restroom! Yes, before class starts!" He yelled behind him as he ran away, letting out a panicked shriek.
"What the hell was that about?" Ranma wondered before shrugging and walking into his classroom.
Twenty minutes later, Ranma looked up from his homework review and saw Akane arrive, looking particularly miserable, her hair dripping wet and her clothes both damp and muddy.
"What happened to you?" Ranma asked Akane as she plopped down at her desk.
"Ugh! The old lady with her ladle. I didn't even see her coming and wham face full of water. Then Kuno goes crazy kendoist on me and I had to dodge around a bit before I could send him packing."
"Hah, serves you right. Been doin' the lion's share of Kuno detail lately," Ranma said, matter of factly. Before Akane could respond, the teacher arrived and history class began.
It wasn't as if Ranma disliked history, especially compared with Math and English, but usually with practice in the morning, a large meal, and dealing with Kuno, he needed a nap first period. Today, however, he found the class engaging, even though class today wasn't on a famous battle or some fearsome warlord from a bygone era.
Instead, the teacher asked the class, "Can anyone tell me who helped mediate the peace treaty that ended the Russo-Japanese War of 1905?"
Ranma felt an alien sensation in both his brain and arm and, almost without realizing it, he raised his arm.
"Saotome?" the history teacher asked, blinking. Other students, in various states of inattention, turned their heads, gasping.
"Um, yeah, I guess. It was the American President at the time, Theodore Roosevelt, during the Treaty of Portsmouth. His back-channel diplomacy helped place Japan on the world stage and Roosevelt received a Nobel Peace Prize for it."
"Yes, that's correct," the teacher said, in an unsure voice. After scanning the room and reasonably certain the world wasn't coming to an end, he then asked the class, "Now can anyone tell me who represented Japan in those negotiations?" The teacher looked around and not seeing a volunteer, picked a name from the roll.
"Hmm... , how about you?" he asked, looking at her desk. To his surprise, she was asleep at her desk, using her arms as a pillow.
"Ms. Tendo!" The teacher exclaimed. Akane, however, didn't even budge. In frustration, he bounced a piece of chalk on her head, which finally roused her from her sleep.
"Wha-what?" Akane hazily said.
"My class isn't a hotel room, Ms. Tendo. Perhaps you can follow your fiancé's example and pay attention. Now..." The teacher continued with his lecture. Akane shook her head, disoriented at what was going on. She saw Ranma, alert, interested, even taking vigorous notes. She adjusted her uniform, wondering why it felt so awkward to sit in.
At lunch, Ranma sat at the base of the tree tugging at his shirt. Akane arrived and sat down next to him.
"What's with you today?" Akane asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Dunno. my clothes feel weird. All wrong." Ranma explained, tugging at his shirt again.
"Stop fidgeting, you look fine," Akane said.
"What about you?" Ranma asked.
"What about me?"
Ranma pointed towards Akane's lap. "That dress ain't gonna get any longer, so you can stop tryin' ta pull it down."
"It feels so short, though. Maybe it shrunk in the wash?" Akane asked.
"It's the same as everybody else's, Akane. Just relax and hand me lunch. I'm pretty hungry."
"You know what Kasumi made for lunch today?" Akane asked.
"I made lunch."
"You?"
"Yeah," Ranma replied, a hint of pride in his voice, "Woke up late last night and decided I wanted a Tori Bento for lunch. I made the chicken and cut the veggies last night."
Akane unwrapped the cloth and gave one of the lacquered boxes to Ranma while she grabbed one for herself. She opened the box. The first thing that hit her was the smell, a mixture of rice wine vinegar, chocolate, and wasabi. The stewed chicken looked more like gelatin than meat and, Akane could swear, it was moving under its own power. She instinctively wanted to throw it out, but she cautiously picked up her chopsticks and took a bite.
Her eyes widened in horror as she spit out the supposed food, "Oh my god, Ranma, this is terrible!"
"What are you talking about? I made this mys-UGH!" Ranma coughed up a mouthful of chicken, gagging, eyes watering. "What the hell? Akane, did you switch the lunch out and not tell me? I'd already made food for us!"
"What are you talking about, Ranma? These were yours and they're just awful!" She made another face and then set the bento aside, opening up instead a little wrapped parcel she pulled out of her bookbag.
"What's that? Kasumi give ya somethin' to snack on?"
"No, we made cookies in Home Ec and since I obviously can't eat the lunch you made these will have to tide me over until we get home."
Ranma snorted. "Hey, I may have messed up lunch somehow but it's still got to be way more edible than anything you could make." Even as he said it, though, the aroma of the baked goods reached him and his stomach growled out its protest.
"Just for that," Akane said, hearing the rumble, "you can't have any until you apologize." She took one and began to eat it, savoring each bite and smiling haughtily at Ranma.
Ranma remained adamant, though his eyes were glassy through the end of lunch.
"Swim class today, ladies and gentlemen," the PE teacher announced the class entered the locker room.
Ranma sighed in relief at the prospect of the one class he felt comfortable in. Granted, today wasn't so bad, but P.E. was his favorite for a reason. He found a water fountain and, after a light spraying of his face, Ranma made her way to the locker room. She briefly wondered why she felt less uncomfortable when she saw Akane walking towards the men's locker room. Quickly, Ranma caught Akane by the crook of her arm.
"Ranma?" Akane asked, giving Ranma a confused look.
"Wrong locker room, " Ranma said, point in the direction Akane was headed and a sign that said 'Boys Locker Room'.
"Oh, right. What was I thinking?"
"I don't want to know," Ranma snidely remarked.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Akane snapped.
"Come on. I ain't missin' any of P.E. just 'cause you decided to pull a Ryouga," Ranma pulled Akane into the locker room.
While the room was perfectly familiar to the full-time girl, she felt a feeling of unease come down upon her, like a fog of shame and embarrassment, She sidled up against Ranma, who was nonchalantly undoing the frog buttons of her silk shirt. It was then Akane noticed the other girls in various states of undress and the sense of unease she felt since walking into the room hit her like a tidal wave of embarrassment.
"Oh gods," Akane muttered and she turned to look straight at the locker, not moving but shaking in place.
"Uh... Akane?" Ranma looked up quizzically at Akane as she took off her shirt. Akane turned to Ranma and they both paused for a moment and wondered why the diminutive redhead was wearing a black lycra sports bra.
"Y-yes, Ranma?" Akane asked, eyes widening as Ranma began taking off the undergarment in question.
"You okay? Ain't your first time changing here, ya know. Hell, if anything, I should be actin' loopy, not you."
"I'm fine, Ranma! I'm just..." Akane groped for a response, "I'm not a pervert like you are!"
"I ain't the one standing around lookin' like they're about to lose all their blood out of their nose, 'kane."
Akane turned away from Ranma, blushing wildly at the sight of Ranma's naked chest. In her panic, she blurted out, "S-shut up! Why, why isn't anybody complaining about you being here?"
Ranma shrugged as she finished undressing and took out a one-piece navy blue swimsuit from her bag. As she put on the swimsuit she replied, "I dunno. Prolly 'cause this ain't the first time I've been here, neither. I have to be a girl on swim days. What's the big deal anyway?"
"Okay, okay fine! You stupid tomboy!" Akane yelled as she started undressing.
"Uh... ain't that my line?" Ranma asked, adjusting the shoulder straps of her swimsuit. Akane failed to respond, but rather struggled with changing out of her uniform. In a blithe voice, Ranma said, "Whatever. See ya soon, Akane. Try not ta get a nosebleed thinkin' bout me," and left towards the pool.
Ten minutes later, Akane wandered to the group. Upon leaving the locker room, the sense of dread and shame left her. Before she could contemplate what happened, she heard the loud scream of the P.E. Teacher "You're late, Tendo!"
"Sorry, sensei," Akane said sheepishly as she walked hurriedly towards the other girls and stood next to Ranma. Akane looked around her and felt as though the other girls in the class were looking at her suspiciously. Even Yuka and Sayuri, her closest friends, were giving her strange, defensive looks. Akane sighed.
The P.E. Teacher gave out his instructions in a loud voice, "All right, we'll start with a hundred meters each of Australian crawl, elementary backstroke, butterfly, and breaststroke. Everyone in the pool!" the P.E. teacher said before blowing a whistle.
"Woo hoo! This is gonna be great!" Ranma said, "See ya later, Akane. Have fun with your kickboard on the shallow end."
"Why you! I-" Akane tried to argue before Ranma dived, or rather, threw herself in the water. Akane thought Ranma dove rather strangely, but chalked it up to her playing around. When she didn't resurface after twenty seconds she grew worried: she walked over to the edge of the pool and saw a small struggling ball of a person at the bottom of the 6 meter deep pool. Akane screamed out, "Ranma!" and executed a skillful forward dive in the pike position and swam down into the deep water.
Down at the surface, she scooped the passed out redhead in her arms. Pushing off the bottom of the pool, she quickly breached the surface of the water. Hurriedly pulling herself, almost jumping out of the water, she lay Ranma down on a towel.
"Ranma! Ranma!" Akane said as she bent down to check her breathing. When she didn't hear anything coming from Ranma she started mouth to mouth resuscitation. She heard a girl in the background say, "I knew she was like that!" Akane ground her eyes shut and balled her fists as she counted 4 seconds and breathed into Ranma again. This time Ranma's body stirred and she coughed up what seemed like a liter of water.
"Oh... Oh shit.. Wha' happened?" Ranma said weakly.
Akane channeled her frustration into righteous anger, "You... dumbass tomboy! You almost drowned! I had to save you! Don't ever do that to me again!"
In a weak voice, Ranma pondered what was being said, "Drown? I've been swimmin' since before I can remember. Maybe Kodachi got some paralysis powder on me or somethin' You're the lead sinker, 'kane. No way you saved me."
"No Ranma, Akane saved you," Sayuri said.
Hiroshi nodded, "Yeah dude, she jumped in and rescued you, "
"I thought you died, man," Daisuke added.
"I'm not-" Ranma shut up as she sat up, grabbing her head as the sudden motion made her dizzy.
"Dammit, what the hell is goin' on?" Ranma grunted.
Akane was unsure what to do or say when the booming voice yelled behind her.
"Tendo! Escort Saotome to the nurse's office."
Akane glanced back briefly, "Yes! Got it, sensei!"
The teacher nodded and said, with a smile, "That was some good hustle out there, Tendo. Treat that girlfriend of yours okay."
"I will- wait! Sensei, it's not like that! I-" Akane protested, but the teacher already had his back turned yelling, "Okay! Back to laps or I'll make it two hundred meters a piece!"
Akane sighed, helped Ranma stand, and, together, walked to the Nurse's Office.
After school Akane and Ranma, back in his male form, were slowly walking home.
"I dunno what happened. I mean I swam to goddamn China. I shouldn't have froze like that. And you, where'd you learn how ta be a lifeguard?"
"I don't know. All I thought was that you were in trouble and I had to save you."
"Heh. Maybe next time, I should get kidnapped. I could use a vacation."
"Like what happened with Sentaro Daimonji?"
"Nevermind," Ranma said, rolling her eyes.
The two rounded a corner when a booming voice yelled from behind, "Ranma! Prepare to die!" Ranma instantly recognized Ryouga. He turned around to face his rival, only to get an umbrella straight in the gut. Ranma doubled over in pain.
"Ranma! Are you okay?" Akane called out.
"I can't move... shoulda dodged it..." Ranma eked out between breaths. He finally regained his breath and shakily stood up. "Dammit, Ryouga, not now!"
Ryouga swiped the air in front of him, "No more running, Ranma! You keep trying to hide from me but today it ends!"
"Dammit, you stubborn asshole. I ain't in the mood for your-" Ranma barely jumped out of the way of Ryouga lunging forward. Ranma fell hard on the pavement as the ground he was standing on exploded in a spray of rock and dirt.
"How did you get so damn fast so quickly, ya pig bastard!" Ranma yelled.
"When did you get so slow?" Ryouga countered.
Ranma stopped and analyzed his movements. The realization hit him like a ton of bricks, so it was a bit less traumatic than Ryouga's last punch. Ranma realized Ryouga was right. He was slow. Really slow. Too slow for any reasonable explanation. Ranma felt like he was in a nightmare. Ryouga had always been stronger than Ranma, but now he was faster and more coordinated. At least when he suffered from the strength-sapping moxibustion, he was still just as fast and agile. Now... he barely felt as fast as when he arrived from China.
Ranma realized something was wrong. No, not wrong. Wrong implied it was a snafu, like slipping on a rock or getting distracted by a ten yen coin. Whatever was going on was so fundamentally against everything that made sense in the universe, Ranma was nearly reduced to tears as he was unable to dodge or block Ryouga's incoming strike. It was all he could do to brace himself for the next strike.
"Stop bullying him, Ryouga!" came a loud voice as Akane forcefully grabbed Ryouga's wrist, rendering his arm immobile.
"A-Akane?" Ryouga asked, completely in shock.
"You could have killed him, dumbass! No more fighting!" she admonished.
"But, Ranma, he's..." Ryouga tried to explain, pointing to his hated rival, who was currently curled up into a ball, holding his midsection, and choking back tears.
"We'll talk to you some other time, Ryouga. Just go home. Or am I gonna have to make you go home?" Akane asked, the threat in her voice perfectly clear even to the somewhat dense boy as she started cracking her knuckles.
"Yes, Akane! I'll see you around sometime," Ryouga said and then promptly got lost.
Akane knelt down next to Ranma, who was slowly coming back to reality.
"Are you okay?" Akane asked, concerned.
Ranma sat up, wiped his face, and looked at Akane. He nodded. "Fight me," he said, "I need to know what's goin' on."
Akane smiled at the prospect of fighting Ranma for real. "Okay. Let's go home."
"We're home!" Ranma said, in a way which he was becoming less and less surprised to realize was how Akane usually said it.
Kasumi was in the dining room, enjoying a quiet cup of tea. "Welcome home. Did you two have a good day at school?"
"It was great!"
"It was awful!"
Ranma and Akane glared at each other and Kasumi just giggled lightly. "I can see it wasn't uneventful."
"We're gonna go to the dojo. Where's Pops?" Ranma asked.
"Father and Uncle Saotome are on a business trip. Grandfather Happosai insisted and wouldn't say when they'd be returning."
"Thank goodness for small favors," Akane snidely remarked.
"Thank you, Kasumi," Ranma said, "you're always so supportive of us. I really appreciate it."
"Of course, Ranma," Kasumi said, "family looks out for one another."
Akane rubbed the back her neck, embarrassed while Ranma smiled sweetly.
"Oh, by the way," Kasumi said, "What would you two like for dinner."
"Omelet rice, please!" Ranma said excitedly.
"Curry sounds real good tonight, Kasumi," Akane said.
Kasumi blinked and said, "I'll see what I can do. I'll see you at dinner, okay?"
Ranma nodded, then blushed a bit before saying, "Um, if ya need us, Akane and I are going to train in the dojo."
Kasumi nodded, and returned to her housework. As Akane and Ranma walked out the back of the house towards the dojo, Kasumi let out a small giggle.
The dojo was quiet but practically vibrating with tension as Akane and Ranma stared across the practice floor at one another. "This is going to be a practice bout, Akane. Three rounds, to the first blow. I'm warning you: I'm going to go all out and I want you to do the same." He realized that saying that made him nervous and he hated himself for it, but he had to know.
Akane gave him a curt nod and dropped into a casual, almost sloppy-looking stance. "Don't worry, I will. Whenever you're ready." She was grinning cockily and it was driving him mad: Ranma found himself charging her just to make her stop smiling like that.
The moment that followed was complicated: far too complicated for Ranma to understand. What he did understand, though, was that he was on his back, his head hurt and Akane was still smiling. "That's round one, right?"
The second round went much like the first: Ranma attempted to fake Akane out with a false opening but she saw through it and landed a single punch to his gut. By the third round he managed to hold himself back, trying to bring the fight to her, but she just stood there. Smiling. "Come on, Ranma, give me a decent fight. Or is that the best you can do?"
After three minutes of watching her and waiting for her to take the lead he dropped from his stance and wiped his brow. "This isn't normal, Akane. Something's happening here."
"What? Do you just think I'm incompetent or something?" Akane spat.
Ranma held his hands up, "No! Come on, Akane, listen to me! Do you really think you've just suddenly gotten better at cooking, just like that?"
"I've been practicing!"
"What about swimming?"
"I've been practicing that too!" She rubbed her elbow, looking off to one side. "At least I was practicing. It wasn't that long ago."
Ranma crouched low to the ground, resting on the balls of his feet.
"And how about fighting? Have you been practicing that too? Enough to lock down Ryouga? You know how good he is: he's a decent fight for me." Ranma growled. "Or he should be. I haven't been humiliated like that since the stupid moxibustion incident. But that's what I'm talking about, Akane. Suddenly you're good at all of this stuff and I'm bad at it, just like you usually are!"
Akane tromped towards Ranma. "And just what is that supposed to mean? Okay, maybe I can't cook and maybe I can't swim, but just because I'm not some kind of obsessive who grew up doing nothing but martial arts day in and day out doesn't mean I'm bad at them! And have you thought that maybe this wasn't all one-way? I noticed you actually answered a question when the teacher called on you in class today. You even raised your hand! You never do that."
He took a breath, trying to get back to a point of calm. "I'm not saying you can't get better at things, but this quickly? With me getting so bad at them all of a sudden? And what about the way we, um, you've been acting? I mean, you were a pig at breakfast and you were actin' like a scared pervert in the locker room and then you yelled at me."
"Well you almost killed me with that lunch. And then you almost got yourself killed!"
"And you don't find that at all weird? Or are you that blind to your faults!?"
"I'm sorry if I'm just better than you at stuff, Ranma," Akane her nose up and sniffed, "I'm just that good. Maybe even the best. I mean, how do you even drown with those giant cow boobs, really?"
Ranma stood up and yelled, "Akane, you... jerk!" He suddenly felt his eyes tear up and, his arm tensed up, slapped Akane across the cheek, and, when he realized what he did, ran back into the house.
Akane slowly trudged upstairs to her room, only to find Ranma sitting on her bed, holding a stuffed rabbit in his hands.
"What are you-"
Ranma held the stuffed animal tighter, and muttered, "I wasn't thinkin' and I ended up here. I was petting the bunny for like a minute before I realized what I was doin'."
"Oh."
There was a pause as Akane sat next to him. She lightly touched her cheek, still hot where Ranma had hit her.
"You're right. This isn't right at all."
"So how do we fix it?" Ranma asked, "Things gotta get back ta normal, but quick."
"Well..." Akane sighed, "what if I don't want things to go back to normal? Have you thought of that? Do you know how hard it is to live in your shadow, Ranma? Before you came here I was the best martial artist in town except for daddy. And now I'm the best again, and if it weren't for-" she stopped suddenly, then continued, "-if it weren't for how sorry I felt for you I wouldn't even be considering the idea of going back to how things were."
"Wait a sec." Ranma's eyes narrowed. "What were you going to say?"
Akane looked away, and said, nonchalantly, "What do you mean? I don't know what you're talking about."
"Aw, come on, Akane, you were going to say something else. If it weren't for what?" Ranma gasped softly, " You ain't afraid of c-c-cats now, are ya?"
"No, don't be stupid! It's just..." Akane halted, her face twisting in uncertainty.
"It's just what?" Ranma asked, his voice filled with concern, "Come on, Akane, this has been awful for me, you could at least tell me what's goin' on with you 'cause of all of this."
"Oh poor you, Ranma!" Akane lashed out, "Honestly, is it that bad being like me? Well I'm so sorry I'm not good at anything, or at least anything you care about! You think I'm enjoying not being able to concentrate in classes?"
"Who cares about classes? How about the Art? You know, the thing I gave up friends, my mother, part of my sanity, and, oh yeah, my manhood for? I feel slow and sloppy and I know I used to know more techniques than I do now!"
"Oh yeah? Your manners - I'm sorry, my manners now- are horrible!"
"At least you still feel comfortable in your clothes!" Ranma said, pointing to Akane's uniform.
"Actually, I hate them! If I had it my way I'd never wear a skirt again!" Akane countered.
"Then give 'em to me! I feel ugly in these clothes!" Ranma blurted out.
Both of them paused, mutual intense embarrassment ordering a ceasefire on their emotional bombardment. Ranma brushed some imaginary lint from his shirt. "...y-you really feel that way?"
Akane nodded, looking away from Ranma and up at a corner of the ceiling. "I feel stupid in it. Guys aren't supposed to wear this junk, right? I kept expecting everyone at school to laugh at me when they saw me in my uniform at school, like I was cross-dressing or something."
Ranma gaped at her blankly for a second. "But you're a girl," he remarked, ever the student of the obvious.
Akane just groaned with exasperation. "I know that! But that doesn't mean I don't feel stupid. It just means I feel stupid about feeling stupid, and then I still feel weird about wearing a dress."
Ranma nodded. "That's exactly how I feel. I mean, this morning I was going to put on that girl's uniform I picked up for that fight with Happosai 'til I stopped myself. I wasn't even thinking about the fact that I was a guy at the time. I mean, if I had any dresses that fit me like this I'd be wearing them right now." He sighed, "Aw man, my head hurts."
Akane nodded, "Mine too, Ranma. But the point is that I'm a girl and you're a guy and if we both went with what this curse or whatever it is is telling us to do we'd get in a lot of trouble, so let's just forget about it and try to focus on getting this fixed, okay?"
"What happened to not wanting to go back?" Ranma asked.
"Don't listen to that, Ranma. I'm just feeling grumpy because of this mess."
Ranma looked at Akane, who was still trying to keep her composure, "Well I wanna go back ta normal too, but I don't know where to start looking. In the meantime, I keep wanting ta feel comfortable and I just can't. So how about instead of givin' each other grief about this we, y'know, just agree not to judge?" Ranma suggested, his voice growing weak with uneasiness.
Akane's jaw dropped, "Are you kidding!? What would people say if they saw you dress-"
"I know what they'd say. They tell me enough times normally, even when I'm a girl. And I ain't suggesting we do it regularly." Ranma sighed, hugging his knees. "But, you know, just for tonight, okay? Y-you can use my closet. Find something comfortable."
Akane crossed her arms across her chest and turned up her nose, though something in the expression said that her heart wasn't in it. "And I guess you expect me to do the same thing? Just let you rifle through my things for something to wear?"
"C'mon, Akane, please? You can't tell me that you want to be wearing that," Ranma said.
Akane pursed her lips for a moment before letting out a low growl, "...fine. But I don't want to hear any complaining about things not fitting. And you'd better change to a girl first."
"Well, duh." Ranma said as he walked out of his room towards the bathroom.
Akane stealthily returned to her room to find Ranma humming to herself before standing up from the small vanity in the corner of the room.
"God, this feels so much better," Ranma said as she energetically plopped onto Akane's bed. She had metaphorically and literally let her hair down, the red wavy hair flowing down her back, echoing the ruffling movement of the yellow cotton sundress. It was the first time since morning that she hadn't felt bound up and uncomfortable, instead feeling breezy and wonderfully relaxed if still embarrassed by the whole affair. Akane herself was calmly sitting up at the edge of the bed, dressed in a pair of charcoal slacks, a white dress shirt, and a navy blue silk buttoned vest.
"Really?" Akane raised an eyebrow, "I can't imagine wearing that now. I mean, how can you fight in that?"
Ranma smirked at her, primly smoothing out the skirt. "Ya know, there's more important stuff than fightin'. Right now I feel pretty and pretty feels good."
Akane unconsciously let out a tittering laugh, "Hah! I never thought I'd hear you say that."
Ranma grabbed a pillow from the bed and placed it under the back of her head. "I never really thought I'd say it myself, but I can't help it. Anyway, you look better. I mean, more comfortable."
Akane nodded, "I am. I mean, even without whatever this curse is, I get really self-conscious in the girls' uniform sometimes. And it's not even as bad as some other high schools."
Ranma nodded before replying, "Yeah, well don't get any ideas: I don't think people'd understand if you went to school in that getup."
Akane looked back at Ranma, smirking, "I don't think they'd understand if you went to school in a girl's uniform either."
"Really?" Ranma asked, looking disappointed. "I can be a girl, though. Ain't like you can be a guy."
"You of all people know it isn't as easy as what body you have. We know at least three people that prove that just about every day."
"Oh yeah..." Ranma said before her attention was turned to the ceiling of Akane's room. "Prolly wouldn't work, anyway. With my luck, all the sprinklers'd be filled with hot water."
Akane looked at Ranma for a while before standing up and turning on the radio to a pop station. She sat down on her desk chair backwards, resting against the back of the chair as she leaned forward to face the bed. After she did so, Ranma spoke: "So what was the stuff in the back of the closet?"
Akane was taken aback. "W-what stuff?"
"In the back, you know? Ya had some shirts in there and some pants. Maybe some underwear too, but I didn't take a real good look. But they were definitely boy clothes."
Akane turn her head towards the window, "They must have been misplaced."
Ranma sat up quickly and replied, "Well, they're not mine and they're too small to be your dad's stuff. So what gives?"
Akane was quiet, looking away from Ranma and awkwardly stuffing her hands in the pockets of her slacks.
"Well?"
"Dammit Ranma," she half cursed, half muttered, "They're mine, okay? It was a phase I went through in middle school. They say it's normal to do things like that when you're that age."
"What, you were tryin' ta be extra tomboy?" Ranma asked innocently.
Akane let out an irritated sigh, "No!" She took a breath before continuing, "I... you know how sometimes you're afraid that being cursed means that you'll completely become a girl?"
Ranma blinked, unsure, but nodded.
Akane placed her arms on the back of the chair and rested her head on her arms, "Well, in middle school, I thought because I'm strong, and I liked to fight, and I wasn't interested in makeup or clothes like my classmates that maybe..." Akane twisted her lips and let out a protracted sigh, "that maybe it was a mistake I was born a girl."
"Woah..." Ranma let out, before adding, "Wait, what?"
"Well, obviously I decided that wasn't the case! But... I had to know if I really was just that much of a tomboy or if maybe I was somehow supposed to be a boy. I had longer hair, but I tucked it under a baseball cap and I bound my chest, though probably not as tightly as Ukyou. I tried it out for a while. On Sundays, away from school."
"Huh," Ranma replied, "Decided that you preferred dresses n' stuff after all?"
"I don't know, you tell me," Akane said, gesturing at her decidedly dapper outfit. Ranma blushed when she realized the oddness of her words. "It's not really about clothes, Ranma. You know that. It's about how people treat you. I think part of it was that I wanted Dr. Tofu to see me as an adult and part of it was that I didn't want to be 'Daddy's little girl'. I never really felt like much of a little girl, not since mom passed away."
Ranma nodded and said, "Yeah. It ain't tha same, but that 'man amongst men' stuff's a real drag. Guess I ain't so different, huh?"
"Well..." Akane considered it for a moment, but shook her head, "you're still working it out. I trust you'll find something that will work for you."
"And what if it ain't exactly... expected?" Ranma asked.
"What do you think I expect?" Akane countered rhetorically.
Ranma closed her eyes for a second, gathering her words, "I mean... everybody. What everybody already thinks of me. The whole 'son husband heir' thing. What if it ain't that?"
Akane narrowed her eyes, looking at Ranma's face, caught off-guard a bit by the vulnerability she saw. Akane tried to think about the implications and what her future may hold. She quickly brushed though thoughts aside and instead focused on her fiancé, currently fiancée. "Well, I... oh, who cares what other people think?" Akane replied, "You've never been one for meeting people's expectations, you know."
Ranma softened her face slightly, brightened by those words, "Heh. Yeah, well... ain't like I said I was goin' hundred percent girl or somethin'. Just a thought. I like bein' a guy, too!" she added, emphasizing the last statement by jabbing her thumb against her chest.
"I agree it has its advantages," Akane said offhandedly, in a playful mood, "Where did you get this outfit anyways? It's not like you to wear something this... nice."
Ranma had an unsure expression on her face, "I dunno. Pops probably stole it from somewhere. A couple of years back probably. Been a while since I was a Men's Small."
"Huh..." Akane remarked, "figures. The fit is good though."
"Hey..." Ranma asked.
"Yes, Ranma?"
"This is real dumb, but you ever thought about... aw, jeez" Ranma covered her face, laughing nervously.
"Ever thought about what? Spit it out, girl," Akane said, chuckling herself.
"Uh, you ever thought about usin' some Nanniichuan?" Ranma asked, "I mean, uh if we ever found any of it."
"Ranma?" Akane stopped smiling.
"I'd already been thinkin' twice about usin' it myself. And right now, the goddamn Locking Ladle sounds more appealin' than being a guy all the time."
"You like being a girl that much?" Akane teased.
Ranma shook her head, "Ain't about like," she put her hands behind her head, "Just feels good, Like it's supposed ta be like this. Right now, it definitely feels more like home than the boy body," Ranma stopped speaking. There was an awkward pause as she looked up at Akane and asked, "So? Ever thought about seein' how the other half lives?" and suggestively raised her eyebrows.
Akane laughed and looked up at the ceiling, "Well, before today, I would have said 'no way in hell'. It was just a phase when I was younger. Right now, though... I guess I never really thought what it would be like if we actually got married..." she looked back and Ranma and saw the redhead's earnest face, without any pretensions or walls, "I'd think about it, just a little."
Ranma nodded. There was an easy quiet between the two for a few minutes, only the faint music of radio permeating the silence.
"Ain't so bad, havin' a curse," Ranma said, "Really, it's just the unpredictability that's a pain in the ass. Especially when people get all fussy about it."
"Well, people don't expect a cute little girl like you to be a boy. It's... strange."
"So are you and don't even got Jusenkyo ta blame," Ranma said, sticking out her tongue.
"Hey! I told you that was only a phase, And whatever is going on right now is definitely your fault, Ranma!" Akane replied, swiping the pillow from under Ranma.
"Hey! You stupid girl-boy, give it back!" Ranma whined.
Akane smiled mischievously, "Make me, tomboy."
Ranma looked around and found another pillow. Grabbing it, she turned to Akane and said, "You're on!"
Their laughter was infectious as they threw pillows at each other: they didn't realize anyone noticed them until they heard Akane's door creak open. The two stopped in mid-action, Ranma straddling Akane and holding a pillow high over her head while Akane had her arms extended to side-swipe Ranma in turn.
They turned their heads and saw Nodoka, her eyes widened as she placed a hand over her mouth to cover her gasp.
"M-Ma, it ain't what you're thinkin'. We..."
Nodoka began laughing softly. After a moment, she turned around and quietly left the room, closing the door behind her.
Ranma and Akane stayed motionless, unsure what had happened.
"Um... Ranma?" Akane said. Ranma was brought out of her daze and, looking down she practically jumped off Akane.
"Ack! Sorry Akane!" Ranma yelled.
"Don't worry about it. We were just messing around," Akane replied sitting up on the bed. She patted the space next to her and Ranma sat down next to Akane.
"I ain't gonna die now, am I?" Ranma asked.
"Hmm... I don't think so. I'd think she would have made more of a scene in that case. Besides, she'd want your father here and he's off with Daddy and Happosai."
"Yeah... besides, you'd save me from my Ma, right? I save you enough times already. You wanna have my skills, ya gotta pay the price."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm thinkin' we need ta see the old ghoul. And you're gonna have to watch my back cause they way I am, the first they'll think of is cartin' me off ta China."
"Sounds like a plan. We should go to bed. It sounds like we're in for a long day."
"Y-yeah. See ya tomorrow, Akane." Ranma just stood there, though, tapping his index fingers together.
"What is it, Ranma?" Akane asked, vaguely annoyed.
"...do you think maybe I could borrow some of your pajamas? Sleeping in my boxers sounds really weird right now."
Akane shook her head. "Not with Auntie Saotome in the bedroom."
He sighed. "Right. Oh well. At least you get a say in the matter."
The next morning, Ranma, in male form and frowning as he tried not to fidget in his Chinese silks, sat at the table. He was calmly eating breakfast while Akane, in jeans and a sweater, was practically inhaling her food. Nodoka sat next to Ranma looking solemn as she slowly drank her tea.
"Hey Ma... you doin' okay?" Ranma asked.
"Ranma, honey. Can we speak after breakfast?" Nodoka asked in a tone that was both insistent and concerned.
"Uh... Akane n' I are headin' out ta see the old ghoul on some business..."
"This concerns her as well."
"Uh, yeah, sure Ma," Ranma said, rubbing the back of his head.
"What is with you today, Saotome?" Nabiki butted in. This being a Sunday, she was relaxing in cutoff shorts and an oversized t-shirt, nursing her coffee and pointedly looking at Ranma, "You look like you got ants in your pants."
"None of your business, Nabiki," Ranma said quietly.
"Oh, these photos here seem to suggest otherwise," Nabiki produced a gloss print of Ranma and Akane mid-pillowfight, Akane lying on top of Ranma in a suggestive pose, particularly since the pillows had been cropped out of the shot. "I always suspected Akane wore the pants in the relationship. I just never thought it was literally true."
"Don't you dare Nabiki! I'll never hear the end of it at school!" Akane cried out.
Nabiki shrugged, "5,000 yen ought to cover the loss of potential business. Normally I could get more, but I'm not sure who I could market it to, other than the lesbians and boys into girl on girl." She smiled. "But I like to see myself as a mainstream provider."
Kasumi suddenly and without warning snatched the photo from Nabiki, catching the middle sister off-guard.
"That isn't very nice, Nabiki," the eldest sister scolded as she looked at the photo, "I think they look rather adorable together, don't you think so, Auntie?"
Nodoka smiled and nodded a bit, prompting Akane to blush and Ranma to feel light-headed. He was just glad the other men of the house weren't around to see this, as he was sure he'd never live it down otherwise.
After breakfast, Ranma and Akane followed Nodoka back to Ranma's bedroom. Nodoka looked at the two of them for a moment before saying anything. "Now, I want to make it clear that I love the both of you very much and it makes me glad to see you get along so well. May I ask what you two were up to last night?"
Even expecting such a confrontation, Ranma and Akane's faces grew red and they looked around nervously.
"Um, Auntie, we weren't-"
"Yeah, Ma. The thing is..."
Before Ranma could explain, Nodoka took Ranma in her arms and hugged him deeply, stronger than Ranma even thought was possible.
"Ma, I can explain-"
She held up her hand. "My son, there's no need for that. What happened was something between a couple and it wouldn't be right for me to interfere."
Ranma fidgeted a little, seeming almost intimidated by his mother being understanding as he would be by her being disapproving. "So... you aren't going to say I was being unmanly?"
"Ranma, I think it's time I let you in on a secret: making your wife happy is the most manly thing imaginable. In the face of that, nothing else matters. If she loves you for it, it's manly."
Ranma was beet red as he gave his mother a plaintive, hopeful look. One of his worst fears seemed to be resolving itself almost immediately as Nodoka spoke. Akane, for her part, was merely beet red.
"Ranma, I love you very much. I just want the best for you. You can tell me anything. I'm your mother, you know," Nodoka said firmly, leaving a startled Ranma frozen like a deer in headlights.
"Uh... yeah, thanks Ma." Ranma said absent-mindedly as she stood there confused with Akane. Nodoka calmly left the room, walked downstairs and said, in a loud voice, "Oh, let me help you with that Kasumi."
Ranma opened his mouth to say something but stopped himself, rubbing his forehead instead. Finally, he managed to put his feelings on the situation into words. "Forget this. Let's get outta here. I can't take this house today."
"Agreed," Akane concurred.
"This was a bad idea," Akane said, looking at her surroundings nervously.
"Huh?"
"Ranma, I don't want to be in public like this."
Ranma looked at her askance, "Whaddaya mean? You were the one who said that we should just try to ignore it."
Akane stomped a foot, "I know what I said! But I don't want to have a bunch of people seeing me in public wearing girl's clothes."
"You're wearing jeans."
"Girls' jeans! It's not the same. I thought it would be but it isn't. I feel so embarrassed."
Ranma rubbed the back of his head, "That makes two of us, but whaddaya want ta do about it? I ain't real happy either, but if we just walked around town the way we want to, people are going to see us and it'll just be a pain in the ass."
Akane considered for a second, "Then let's not do it in town. Let's pack some changes of clothes and take the train somewhere, then just get changed before we arrive."
"Hmm, I guess if we can get a station with a coin locker... yeah, why not? Let's deal with the old ghoul then get back and grab some stuff for later," Ranma suggested.
"Deal."
"Well, son-in-law, what brings you..." Cologne paused to take a puff on her pipe and let a particularly goblin-like smile surface on her lips as she eyed the duo before her. "Well now. That's quite the predicament you've gotten yourselves into. Come to see me for some help then, have you?" She gestured to the empty chairs at the table. "What is it, then? A change of bodies?"
Ranma sat down and shook his head. "Not really, but it's somethin' like that. How'd ya know?"
"Your chi pathways. They're all... rather flim-flammed."
"'Flim-flammed'?" Akane asked incredulously.
"Technical term," she waved off Akane, "Son-in law, your chi path reads as yours, though it's as though your chi is trying to imitate Akane's and vice-versa. Have you two been fallen into some rogue magic? Did that perverted master of yours find yet another dangerous artifact to play with like a kendama?"
"We've got no idea what happened!" Akane said, "We both just woke up like this yesterday. So you know what it is? Please tell me you can fix it?"
Cologne put a hand to her chin, humming seriously as she closed her eyes and thought. After a few minutes, she opened her eyes and shook her head. "I don't know what it is, Akane Tendo. I can only just see what it's done to your chi. And if you don't know what caused it either then fixing it is going to be difficult if not outright impossible." Another grin, her eyes alight with mischief. "Now why don't you humor an old woman's curiosity and tell me just what it is that it's doing?"
Ranma swallowed. "I can't remember how to fight. Well, I can but I can only remember what Akane remembers an' she remembers what I do. Same goes for stuff like swimmin', studyin', and cookin'."
"And is that all? That's certainly terrible, but is that everything?" Cologne asked, raising her eyebrows suggestively.
The boy fidgeted under her probing gaze, then bashfully shook his head. "...no, but I really don't wanna talk about the rest."
Cologne just burst out laughing. "No, I don't think you would! The two of you must be so confused right now: I'm surprised you're managing to act as normal as you are."
"It ain't easy, lemme tell you," Ranma muttered, "Feel like I'm wanna burst outta my own skin."
"Well, if you find yourself unable to cure this latest affliction, you can always marry Mousse," Cologne said offhandedly.
"Oh, hell no!" Ranma yelled, prompting Cologne to cackle madly, "I'm only kidding, son-in-law. Don't worry, we'll get this fixed: you're no good to us like this."
Akane rolled her eyes and spoke to Cologne in a bitterly sarcastic voice, "Oh, thanks. I'm so glad to hear poor Ranma is going to be better."
Cologne merely laughed at her expense, "Well, Akane, If you'll indulge an old woman, I'd like to see just how complete this transference is," She turned back towards the kitchen, "Shanpu! Come here!"
"Yes, great-grandmother?" Upon seeing Ranma, Shampoo lunged forward to glomp, only to be easily stopped by a blow to the face by Akane.
"Leave him alone, Shampoo!"
Shampoo rubbed her face, getting into a stance "Pervert-girl think she can play, huh?"
"Outside please," Cologne warned.
"Outside or inside no matter, beat up ugly pervert in ten seconds flat," Shampoo puffed up her chest.
"Bring it on, Shampoo! I've been dreaming of this day." Akane said, grinning madly.
Akane and Shampoo left the restaurant, Ranma and Cologne trailing behind, and walked towards a vacant lot. Standing a few meters apart from one another, they got into battle stances.
Ranma, raised a hand, yelling "Woah! Shampoo! Informal fight! No crazy Amazon rules today!" Ranma yelled.
"No need worry, Airen. Won't hurt pervert girl so-" Shampoo was silenced by a leg sweep, which caught her off guard.
"Pay attention, kitty cat."
Shampoo jumped to her feet, "Oh, it on now, man-girl!"
Ranma was awed watching Akane and Shampoo trade blows with one another. He was stymied by the fact that, even though he knew they weren't moving that fast, most of the time, he could only see blurred motion.
Suddenly, in mid-air, Akane landed a solid blow to Shampoo's shoulder, sending her into the ground. Shampoo righted herself as Akane lazily floated back down. Shampoo pulled out two rather impressively sized chui and charged Akane.
"Kashuu Tenshin Amaguriken!" the Amazon shouted, striking forward at blinding speed. Akane, a smile on her face, dodged each and every strike. In fact, Ranma realized, she was leading Shampoo around in a circle.
"Not a circle," he corrected himself, "A spiral."
RIght on cue, Akane hurled a fist in the air in between herself and Shampoo and shouted, "Hiryu Shouten Ha!" and up came the the torrent of wind, sending Shampoo flying off into the more residential part of Nerima.
"Impressive. I'll have to step up Shampoo's training..." Cologne noted before turning back home, "Well, I have a restaurant to tend to. I'll see if I can figure out what may have happened to you two. Despite your protests," Cologne turned to Akane, "I doubt you wish to remake yourself in Ukyou Kuonji's image or take more... drastic measures."
Akane gulped but nodded as Cologne, cackling heartily, bounded away on her staff.
Shampoo, having landed in the canal that snaked throughout Furinkan, hissed loudly, the water feeling especially uncomfortable in her cat form.
"I will kill you for this insult, Akane Tendo. I swear it!" she thought, yowling and hissing, as she floated downstream.
"Oh man, that was awesome!" Akane exclaimed as they made their way down the street, walking side by side. Ranma looked warmly on the black-haired girl as she jumped up and pumped a fist in the air.
"Not bad, 'kane. She didn't even see it comin'," Ranma remarked, smiling a bit as he looked up at her..
"Spun her Amazon butt around and then blam Chinese to go!" She sighed in a self-satisfied manner, "I always wanted to do that to that stuck up bitch! That'll shut her up for a while."
"Yeah, I'm... happy for ya." Ranma replied in a low, strained voice.
Akane spun around to face the boy. "Ranma?"
Ranma laughed nervously, "It's funny... I'm still kinda pissed because I can't remember how ta do the Hiryu Shouten Ha, but I'm also kinda happy that you're happy, too. You beatin' her made me happy, too. Ain't that weird?"
"Ranma, you were proud of me?"
Ranma laughed again, "Well... ya didn't make my skills look bad out there. Guess that means somethin'." he kept walking onwards, grinding his eyes shut for a second. Akane opened her mouth, about to say something, when Ranma, a twinkle in his eyes and a soft smile on his face, said, "Let's get out of Furinkan for a while. I think I know where I wanna lie low for a while."
After a quick trip home, Ranma and Akane left again, Akane carrying a sizeable duffel bag. At Aoyama Station, they found a coin locker and changed to more comfortable attire, Ranma, in female form and her hair loose, wore a green cotton sundress, a white cardigan, white wedge sandals, and a straw hat. Akane was dressed in Ranma's pale green Mao suit, complete with "liberation" cap. Her chest was bound and, next to a petite Ranma, she looked like an average, if somewhat baby-faced, teenage boy.
After changing trains, they exited Ginza station and entered into the throngs of pedestrians walking around one of the busiest parts of Chuo Ward.
"This is lying low?" Akane asked, a bit uncomfortable with the crowds.
" Well, we both wanted to be comfortable, but didn't want anyone we knew to see us doing what we needed to do. You said we had to somewhere away from the idiots in Nerima so I thought Ginza was the right place."
"Why Ginza?"
Ranma rolled her eyes, "Because. There's some really nice stores here and since we were going out I kinda felt like shopping. The Matsuya Ginza is so cool!"
"Shopping? For clothes?" Akane asked for clarification.
Ranma nodded, "Yeah. Probably. Maybe a stuffed animal, too. If you get bored we could go watch a movie or go to a game center."
Akane nodded nervously as she led Ranma through the crowds. "It's really crowded here."
"Sure is," Ranma replied.
"Think anyone's looking at us?" Akane asked.
"Doubt it. Maybe you a little bit, but I'm pretty sure that people think you're a guy."
Akane thought about it for a bit and said, as they rounded a corner, "This is nice."
"Yeah, it is," Ranma said in a dreamy voice as she grasped Akane's hand more tightly.
A few hours later, Akane and Ranma found themselves walking down an open patch of sidewalk. Akane was holding onto a large paper shopping bag, relieved that Ranma hadn't taken as long as she feared looking for clothes. In this condition Ranma was pretty bad, but compared to other excursions this was more than tolerable.
"What kind of movie do you want to watch, Ranma?" Akane asked.
"Hmmm?" Ranma looked up from her ice cream cone, "I dunno, somethin' actiony, but maybe with a love story or somethin' too? Whatever's goin' on is makin' me feelin' kinda mushy today."
"Hmm..." Akane weighed the options, "Action I'm in the mood for. Romance... nothing too boring, okay?"
Ranma nodded, then let out a wry chuckle, "This is so messed up, Akane."
Akane nodded, fiddling with her cap, "Yes. Yes it is, Ranma."
They made it to a generic-looking movie theater, a large neon sign labeled "CineSwitch" was placed over the marquee. The line was rather long, mostly because a movie was about to start. Ranma and Akane were debating which of the listed movies they should see when someone pushed Ranma from behind. "Oh, I'm so sorry!" a boyish voice said.
Ranma turned around and looked at him, smiling, "Oh, It's okay. Accidents..." Ranma was rendered speechless as she stared at the person in front of her.
Akane, noting Ranma's expression, turned around herself and asked, "Is everything okay Ran-" and was also rendered dumbstruck. In front of Ranma and Akane was Konatsu and Ukyou. Ukyou was wearing her gakuran, chest bound, and looking like a rather dashing teenage male, while Konatsu was in an especially colorful kimono, his dark brown hair up in a fancy updo. The kunoichi had his arms wrapped around Ukyou's left arm and Ranma felt moved to do the same to Akane.
"A-A-ka-" Ukyou tried to stammer, but stopped when she felt a tug at her sleeve. She saw Konatsu tilt his head at her. Ukyou turned back to Akane and said, in a practiced tenor voice, "Ah, sorry man, didn't mean to run into your date."
Akane replied in a less practiced voice, "Yeah, uh, no problem, buddy." Akane turned turned back to face the front of the line. Ranma looked back on the two of them and smiled at Konatsu before turning back to Akane and giving her a big hug.
After buying their tickets Akane and Ranma kept an ear out and, when they heard Ukyou say the name of a different film (the one Ranma really wanted to see) they breathed a sigh of relief and walked inside.
"Whatever we saw never happened, all right?" Akane asked in a whisper.
"Definitely."
"If ya swing that wildly 'kane, no wonder ya smacked me with that foul ball that one time."
"You're the one that decided we had to use the fast-pitch baseball setting. And anyway, aren't I really swinging like you would?"
"Crap..." Ranma muttered, leaving Akane chuckling. Ranma stuck out her tongue as Akane ignored her and walked further. Just before Ranma started to catch up, a tall man, in his early twenties, clad in a cheap suit and over-moussed hair blocked her path.
"Hey, good lookin'. Want to go grab some tea?"
Ranma took one look at him and began seeing red. She cocked her fist, but before she could deliver a punch, Akane grabbed the man's shoulder.
"She's with me, pal." Akane said coolly.
"What's a fine piece of ass like want to do with a pussy-boy like you?" He sneered.
He wasn't sure who threw the first punch, they short-haired boy in Chinese clothes or the redhead in the dress, but the pain was all too real and, all too soon, he found himself airborne and in immense pain, unable to enjoy the sight of Tokyo Bay with his one good eye.
"Bastard..." Ranma remarked.
"Are you okay Ran-"
"I can take care of myself, Akane!" she yelled, her face flushed.
"You could at least say thank you, you know..."
"Thank you? I said I can take care of myself, Akane! I'm damn sure I can handle one dick who don't take 'no' for an answer, even not knowin' everything I'm supposed ta."
"Well what was I supposed to do? He was trying to put his hands all over you!" Akane replied.
Ranma gave Akane a half-lidded stare, along with a sly smile, "Jealous much? I thought you didn't care about your 'sexless fiancée'."
"That's me, you dumbass," Akane pointed out. Ranma stopped her posturing, looking downwards and twiddling her fingers. Akane rolled her eyes, grabbed Ranma hand and the two continued.
Ranma blushed. "We did it again, huh?" she muttered.
"Yeah."
"You were just doin' what I'd do. Bein' all pushy and disrespectful."
Akane added, "And then you were defensive about it and thought that if you thanked me you'd be saying that you needed my help to take care of it."
"Yeah... But I coulda taken care of it, is the point," Ranma emphasized.
Akane nodded in acknowledgement, "I know that. But don't you think I'd have to be some kind of jerk to just stand there and watch someone paw at you like that? We're supposed to be fian-friends, right?"
"Yeah." Ranma smiled a little, "Yeah we are. Look, thanks, 'kane. I woulda been able ta deal with him if I'da been alone, but... I'm glad you were around."
It was several hours past dark as they strolled towards home, hand in hand. Akane and Ranma were back in their regular clothes, though Ranma was still in girl form, holding onto a stuffed panda bear with her free hand.
Ranma leaned in close and said in a low voice, "I had a good time, Akane. Thanks for taking me out here."
"I had a lot of fun too, Ranma. We'll have to do this again some-" She paused, mouth agape, then blushed furiously.
Ranma just stared at her, clutching her new bear. "What's wrong, Akane? Did we forget something?"
"Ranma, I took you out to the Ginza. I followed you while you went shopping, we had lunch, we watched a movie, we visited a batting cage, and now I'm taking you home. I think we just had our first real date."
Ranma swallowed upon realization. "And I was the girl," she said, summing up. She closed her eyes, then smiled impishly. "In that case..." she trailed off, leaning up on her toes and kissing the taller girl lightly on the cheek. "I had a wonderful time. Thank you."
Akane, blushed, brushed her cheek, feeling the trace of lip gloss Ranma had forgotten to take off and said, dumbly, "No problem."
The house was already dark when they got home, except for a small light in Kasumi's room on the second floor. Akane opened the door and let Ranma go in front of her. As they took off their shoes in the entranceway, Ranma said, "Hey uh, I know I've been kinda angry about all this. I've been frustrated. I mean, it feels like I'm back to square one. But I've been thinking about it and, ya know, if... if you really like the way things are, that's... that's okay by me."
Akane blinked. "What are you talking about?"
Ranma smiled weakly, "All it means is that I gotta train again, right? Didn't kill me the first go round, so maybe it won't be so bad. Maybe the old ghoul'll go easy on me this time. Hell, you can probably teach me. I mean, I don't even mind if ya wanted ta be my boy-"
"Ranma!" Akane said, "I don't want that! I... I want to be strong like you, but I don't wanna be you. I won two fights today, right? Shampoo attacked me and I beat her, and then that guy wouldn't take no for an answer and I sent him packing. It felt great."
She sighed, sitting down on the raised step that led into the hallway. "But none of it counted, because I didn't beat them. You did, Ranma, or your skills did. And if we stay the way we are, I'll never win. Anything I do from here on out will be things I did with what I took from you, and nobody will respect that. I certainly won't."
Ranma looked away, her lip quivering, "Ya seemed real happy though. I..." she hung her head, "shit, I ain't ever been good at doin' that. If you want it, if it'd make ya happy, take it. I enjoyed being with ya today, even if it felt all weird n' stuff."
"That's just it. It doesn't really make me happy. I want the things I do to be on my own terms. You know I wanted to enjoy the things I used to with you today, but I was... so not like me. I don't know how you feel about this, but I want to go back to normal. I want to be myself again."
Ranma slowly nodded, turning back towards Akane. "Okay. First thing tomorrow, we'll go and figure this out. I ain't stoppin' until we get back to normal, okay?"
Akane smiled, "Thanks..." she chuckled and jokingly said, "you know you're cute when you're decisive. I don't want to be a boy, but I wouldn't mind having a girlfriend like you around."
"Ha, freakin' ha..." Ranma dryly replied, stepping up to the hallway. "but you're not so bad yourself. I think I prefer you as a tomboy, too."
Akane stood up to meet her. "There's just one thing, Ranma."
Akane's expression was serious: Ranma tilted her head to one side. "What is it?"
"If... when we find a way to fix this, I want you to teach me." Ranma opened her mouth but Akane held up a hand. "I mean it. I can deal with having you for a sensei. Now that I've felt what you can do, I'm willing to do what it takes to earn it for myself."
Ranma nodded. "If you're ready to learn, I'll do what I can to teach you. You've got a long way to go, though. It ain't gonna be easy, but I promise I'll try."
They looked at each other briefly, each contemplating embracing the other, when a sudden draft reminded them they were standing in the middle of the entranceway.
"We should get to bed," Akane decided.
They walked upstairs and, in front of Akane's bedroom, they stood there for a second before, on impulse, Akane pecked Ranma's forehead.
"Night, Tomboy" Akane said in a low voice.
"Night girl-boy," Ranma whispered in reply.
The next day, Ranma woke up and prepared for the day. He washed his face, tied his hair back in a pigtail and put on his silks, which felt smooth as butter. He found his father asleep, seemingly half-dead from the "business trip" and smirked. After quietly opening the bedroom window, Ranma grabbed Genma in one quick motion and effortlessly flung him out the window.
"Wakey-Wakey, Mr. Panda!" Ranma yelled before following his father out of the window.
A little while later, Akane woke up, stretched, and took off her boxers and tank top before changing into panties, a bra, and finally, her uniform. She brushed her hair and found her favorite perfume, dabbing just a bit of it on the back of her neck.
She slowly walked downstairs in time to see Ranma, in male form, spin in the air to kick Genma back into the koi pond in a loud, dramatic splash.
"Breakfast Mr. Saotome, Ranma," Kasumi called out.
"Hell yeah! Later Pops." Ranma said as he jumped from the boulder onto the wooden deck and calmly entered the living room. Sitting down at the table he grabbed a bowl of rice and, almost like a magic trick, made its contents disappear into his stomach. He grabbed a second bowl, one intended for Akane.
"Ranma, you disgusting boy! Stop acting like-" Akane froze, "like yourself."
Ranma, holding a large chunk of rice in his chopsticks halfway between the bowl and his mouth looked up, confused.
"Look at us," Akane said, pointing to herself and Ranma. The realization made Ranma drop his chopsticks.
"Oh, shit."
"Ranma, watch your language," Nodoka said as she sat down at the table, followed by a weary-eyed Nabiki, Soun, a human Genma, and finally Kasumi.
"Sorry, Ma. Just... I just realized somethin' kinda important."
"I see. Well, when you two finish school today, come straight home. I have something for you both," Nodoka said to Ranma and Akane
"Okay Ma," Ranma replied in between bites of food.
When Ranma and Akane came back, Nodoka was at the door. She gave Ranma a small gift-wrapped bundle and handed Akane an envelope.
"I would probably wait until you get to Akane's room before opening it," she remarked. Ranma and Akane nodded slowly before retreating upstairs.
Left alone, Ranma gave the envelope to Akane and Ranma slowly unwrapped the present. Akane opened the envelope, revealing a small letter.
Dear Ranma and Akane,
I just want the both of you to know that I'm sorry for walking in on such an intimate moment between the two of you. You have nothing to be ashamed of: young couples often experiment as a way of expressing their love. Genma and I certainly tested the limits of what could be called love in our time. In private, that is perfectly acceptable.
That having been said, while I'm perfectly happy with the two of you finding a way that you feel comfortable together, I'm still expecting grandchildren from you and wouldn't want your play to get in the way of that. Think of this as your mother suggesting an alternative.
-Nodoka
Ranma unfurled the bundle, revealing a pink chemise in sheer silk lined in lace and satin. He held it out in front of him, his brows furrowed.
"I don't get it. I mean, I guess it's kinda cute n' all, but..."
Akane examined the garment closely until the realization dawned on her. She blushed suddenly and found it hard to speak.
"I-I, I think that's for you. Like you right now."
Ranma raised an eyebrow, "Huh? But it's from Ma. That don't make no sense."
"Ranma, look at the size! You think that would fit me, let alone you as a girl?"
Ranma blinked and looked at the tag on the side of the chemise and blushed crimson before slapping his forehead. "Great. Ma thinks I'm a crossdresser."
"Well that's technically true," Akane just kept smiling. "If you decide to wear it, I want to see."
Ranma looked at her aghast, still holding the garment. "You think I want anybody else ta see that!?" Nervously, he looked at the pink silk garment once more and brought it against him, " ... but okay, I will."
Author Notes
I have the worst time forcing myself to write, I swear. I can't begin to explain how much it's helped me to have a collaborator to get my ideas off the ground and out into the world. I simply couldn't have done this or Prodigal Daughter on my own.
And I swear this story isn't just an excuse to see Ranma wearing dresses.
Honest.
- Unsurpassed Travesty
What a strange manic road this has been. UT has been suggesting the idea to me for a while now and we've joked back and forth on what it would be like. One day, she just started writing dialogue and then I came in and started fleshing out the scenes and, after about 36 hours of mostly furious writing (aside from sleep and our day jobs), we had the skeleton for, not just this chapter, but the next two installments (Yes Virginia, this story has an ending :D).
In other collaboration news, Prodigal Daughter 2 is close to finished (and may already be published by the time you see this).
And finally, on my own front, Balance six and seven are slowly coming to fruition and some of my hanging stories are getting there. I'm also working on something special involving a well-worn subgenre, hungover princesses doing things they'll soon regret, unintentional intentional lesbian romances, and the meaning of family.
～裏には裏がある