Keep moving,
Tris said to herself, while completing the last journey of her life. She has completed most of its journey, leaving the most difficult part in the final.
Grass moved under her footsteps and Tris tried to concentrate on the sound of grass instead of burning sensation in her legs. The wind was blowing, and she felt like floating in the wind. Her hair stuck to the sweat on her neck, but nothing could destroy the peace that she felt at that moment. With a ticket in her hand, she believed that her steps will bring lasting freedom according to her version. Tris just want to go as far as to forget all the problems of life
.***
When she arrived at the station, the train is yet to come. She walked toward the bench at the corner. Metallic walls and pillars around it make the atmosphere noticeably cooler. Her hoodie still faithfully covered the reddish color of her face.
Her eyes catch chromatic colors of the train. She didn't move from the bench only occasionally change her feet position. People around it had been towards the train which will leave New York- as her purposes.
The sound of final whistle train sounded, leaving her aware of its static position toward the train cars. The train wasn't so fancy, but she felt quite comfortable. With sure, she entered the train, looking for her seat accordance the seat number on the ticket.
Tris just want to go as far away from New York to avoid the memory of that men. The men who was responsible for the destruction of life in recent months. The men who responsible for the unhealthy life patterns, office work piling up, and certainly her heart shattered.
The men who believed during the two years it has ruined her life. It was a night. Tris followed her boyfriend, Peter, from the basement. He stopped at the apartment in the apartment next to hers. Currently, the apartment door was open, it had never occurred to her that Peter is gay men.
Tris was shocked, her heart broken. She tried to be brave and strong. But finally she gave up and chose the only way that will make it feel eternal peace according to her version.
After a two-hour drive, it making Tris tired. She opened the train window and cold air rushed in. Although it is January, it feels like a breath of winter air. Wind biting his face and made her tingle. It so refreshed after sitting for two hours on the train.
"Is this seat taken?" Tris looked up from a magazine article she read and with half-hearted smiling at him.
"Sorry," she said. She took the bag is placed in the man's seat. It's nice to have someone to talk to the last part of her journey.
"I'm Four." That guy introduced himself without being asked.
Tris turned her head, looked at him. He looks quite young, friendly, and open. He is tall, with a hook nose, full bottom lips and handsome. Tris stared his blue eyes. that reflects coolness. She didn't know how long she was staring his blue eyes until the sound of his throat makes Tris realized.
"Tris." Tris immediately looked away hoping that Four didn't see blush in her cheeks.
Tris pretended to continue reading, but found herself distracted by the man. "Beautiful day," he commented. Tris nodded.
"Where are you going?"
"Chicago," said Tris.
"Same," Four said as she dug her bag. He took some bubble gum and offered to Tris.
"You've never been to Chicago before?" Four chewed his gum.
"Once. Chicago is a beautiful place."
"Yes indeed. You're going to love it. I stayed there and maybe I don't want to live anywhere else."
The silence suddenly appeared, but the Four's voice broke it. "What is your goal to go there?"
"Suicide" The answer is short. Immediately Four choked his gum.
"What? You must be crazy. Why Chicago? "
"I have no idea. Maybe as I said earlier. There are beautiful place. I am planning near Navy Pier, beside Michigan lakes with rocks, and the water is calm, may be the most beautiful moments to the end of my life. My Plan B is in Hancock with a tinge of evening sun. Beautiful isn't it? "
"Let me correct. This is not the most beautiful, but this is the weirdest day of my life. Returning to Chicago, met with a strange girl like you who travel far just to suicide? "Four said, shaking his head in disbelief.
"You are not understands my problem." Four just rolled his eyes.
"It must be because you break up with your boyfriend right?"
Tris turn to Four who were grimacing. "Right?"
Tris open her tiny lips.
"I just don't know what else I can do in this world. He dumped me for some reason that I don't understand. I wasn't able with all of this. "
"That's life. No one we know. Be assured, with the ignorance that does not mean God does evil to us. God may purposely protect us from the idea itself."
"You're talking too much. That was only part of the problem. "Four narrowed his forehead. Tris took a deep breath and exhale.
"I broke up with my boyfriend. His name is Peter. We've been together for 2 years but the last few months, when I moved into my new apartment, I feel something has changed. His behavior is strange and I suspect that. And one evening when I come home from work, I saw Peter in the basement and I followed him. His footsteps stopped in the apartment next to mine. I opened the apartment door and saw Peter cheating with a man. They're doing it. I don't understand why he decided to be a gay. Aarrrgghh that incident made me sad."
After hearing the story, Four can't hold his laughter but on the other side he is sorry for her.
"That's not funny." Said Tris, looked upset.
"Sorry, he's stupid. He should be grateful for having a beautiful girl like you. "Tris turned toward Four and their eyes met. Her cheeks flush
"If you die, what about the feelings of the people who love you? You didn't think about that?"
Tris realized. She stared at her reflection in the window. Suddenly silhouette softness of his mother appeared in her mind. The face of his father who stern and compassionate. The face of his brother who never tired to make she smile. Maybe they all were worried about her disappearance. She felt guilty when she would end her life by suicide.
"Sometimes sadness needed solitude, though often the loneliness invited unbearable sadness."
Tris just silence leaning against the train window. She saw drops of rain on the window. She pondered the words of Four earlier. Four was right. But would she be able to return to New York and managed to forget all the problems? No, it's too difficult.
"Look, the weather was sunny and it's raining. The weather kept changing and we never know when it will change. That's life. "Tris just glance at Four and immediately returns her gaze out the window.
"Do you like rain?"
"No, I like lightning."
"So you had been seeing the window just looking for lightning?"Tris nodded. "What's the philosophy?"
"Rain is synonymous with darkness because of overcast skies. Fortunately, there is lightning, the sheen gives the light of life even though sometimes give a fear."
"Rain is more powerful than lightning. Rain is the brave of divine creation. Rain wants to fall and dare to fall."
Tris just quietly admit that she lost.
The journey already passed. Now the train begins to slow down when entering the Chicago area. tris stole a glance at Four. Tris liked Four's eyes because it reflects the freshness of the air on the beach. She felt calm. Seen at the end there is a station that became the goal, Chicago Union Station. Their journey stopped at Union Station. Tris step down first followed by Four. The atmosphere there is not so crowded
"I hope that you undo your intention to commit suicide. I will be take you traveling around Chicago."
"Okay. How do I reach you? I don't have your phone number"
"I will give if we truly see each other again." Four replied, smiling.
"Okay. We met in the park cafe near Millennium Park in two days. That place easily found by tourists like you. At 2 pm. I am disciplined. Don't be late!"
"Okay." With that they went part take in the opposite direction.
"Four," called Tris faint after walking a few steps. She's not sure the man heard her voice. However, Four with a smile on his face turned around and look at Tris smiling sincerely. "Thank you."
Tris glanced at her watch. Two forty-five. It means that an hour had passed. It may her fault since Tris come too quickly to the cafe, but she didn't want to be late and lose her time with Four. Rarely she went to Chicago, maybe she's not in Chicago now if no suicide plan is apparently cancelled.
Four said that he is discipline people but he didn't come yet. It makes Tris bored. Her eyes staring blankly, ranging from staring at two glasses of tea are scattered on the table where two lovers who are arguing, a mother who was stroking his son's head, and he also looked at a man dressed in black with a snake tattoo on his neck. He was alone. It seems he was also waiting for someone. The man is also staring blankly into the glass window beside him. Tris is gawking just to see what menu which she want order.
Fragrant aroma of coffee is spread in the air. Tris saw coffee mug on her desk which is only half. And because a little nervous, making her sip constantly. Tris looked around the cafe. Yellow walls remind warning of danger. Almost all signs that implied to be careful always yellow. This makes it increasingly erratic feelings. He worried Four didn't come and just lie to her. Blink her eyes caught sight of the other. The man leaved his seat and go away.
Tris see the man's cell phone lying on the table. She got up and pushed her chair back. Her legs walked toward the door without her orders. Tris pick up the phone and turned to go looking for the owner. She pushed the glass door in front of her. But he has not seen.
When Tris running suddenly the phone screen light up and there is incoming messages. Fear if it is urgent business messages, she finally read the message.
"Uriah, Four was gone. The medical team couldn't save him." Her eyes widened when she read the message. What is meant Four is the same as that which she knew? Don't want to worry too much, Tris keep looking for the owner of the cell phone, Uriah.
Uriah stood on the corner looking for his cell phone. Tris approach him.
"This is your cell phone, you'd left it in the café."
"Oh God, thank you so much"
"There was a message, sorry I've read it."
After Uriah read the message, his face turned pale. He didn't believe that his friend was gone.
"I'm sorry. But can you show me a picture of Four? I'm waiting for someone named Four in the cafe. "
"Sure"
Uriah showed his picture along with Four and his brother. Tears felt down on her cheeks. She didn't think that Four on the picture similar to those she knew. The man who actually had infiltrated into her heart and the man who capable make private space in her heart. But now he has gone and never come back.
The funeral procession was finished. Everyone has gone, there are only Uriah and Tris. She looked at the gravestone in front of her. Now she believes that Four was gone and his body buried in the ground.
"So you are the girl who he met on the train?" Tris only nodded
"He didn't stop talking about you. Listen, Four is not with us anymore, but I'm sure that he is happy. Not everyone is meant to be in your future. Some people are just passing through to teach you lessons in life." Tris kept sobbing, "I'll leave you alone."
Tris couldn't help but want him to come back and tell him that everything would be alright, she's alright. He save her life and now she wished he could be here, accompany her to continue her life.
END…