Lessons of Life

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the True Blood characters (unfortunately). I only only my original stories and characters.

It's been a long time since I've written anything and I'd really appreciate some constructive criticism (and some nice feedback. My ego always likes that!). All spelling mistakes and dodgy grammar are completely my fault. All bad translations are either the fault of online translators or stemming from the fact that I didn't listen properly during language lessons all those years ago in school. Please enjoy my story.

Chapter 1:

I looked at the mess around me and smiled. Last night had been fun. Godric was gone but sulky was still hanging about, waiting for his return. "If you have something to say Eric, spit it out". He zipped in front of me, growling, hits fists balled up. "Eric, back off". Eric stood towering over me, his muscles twitching. He looked like a tiger sizing up his prey, like he might pounce at any minute. "I said BACK OFF", this time I shoved him lightly in the stomach, making him stumble back a little, knocking over a wooden table.

"Damn it Sean. Look what you've done to him" he said straightening himself up. I knew what he meant but I didn't answer course I'd seen the changes in Godric but I couldn't see how that could be my fault, or at least I wouldn't admit that it might be my fault. Sure, he'd mellowed out over the years, but that wasn't so bad. I liked this Godric. Eric stalked away, grabbing his head with his fists, then, whipping around to me again "He's MY maker. Not yours. MINE. You're nothing but a toy to play with, when he's bored". I could feel my steely resolve falter. Eric saw this and took his opportunity. "You've ruined the vampire I knew; you've made him feel he owes you, that he must oblige you. That's why he's changed, because YOU made him". His voice was getting louder, his rage breaking through. "What exactly do you think he wants with you, huh? You're a child. You're nothing but a weak little runt to him. I see the way you look at him. He will NEVER look at you that way. You can NEVER satisfy him, EVER" he spat. Eric could never have physically over powered me, but those last words hit like no other pain could. I could never satisfy Godric, not like I was. This was something I felt deep down. That pain made my mind rip apart… … Eric was right, I was changing Godric and I was holding him back. I looked straight into Eric's eyes. I saw his pain and his anger but most of all I saw the hate, his pure hatred of me. I was in the way of him and Godric, and I was making Godric become something he was never meant to be. I turned, feeling the tears roll down my face and the sorrow rip at my chest. I did the only thing I could think of. I ran.

…somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean….

I jumped with a start, the pain pulling at my chest. It took a few seconds to place where I was. I often dream of that last day I saw Godric. I wonder now if maybe I was wrong. It's hard to know. I should have slapped Eric silly, for that I'm sure. I shouldn't have let him speak to me like that. He broke my dead heart but he also gave me the push I needed to move on and let myself grow up. But that doesn't mean I'm thankful for it, I hate him for it. Looking back now, Eric was nothing but a jealous little infant.

Remembering I was still on the plane on my way to Ireland, I looked around, hoping I hadn't drawn any attention to myself. I was playing human so the last thing I needed was to do something stupid. I didn't like the travel coffins, there's just something too creepy about them.

Looking out of the plane window I can see the little lights of Dublin city. Funny how the moment I decide it's time to suck it up and go to see Godric that I chicken out. Well, not quite chicken out, but I'm playing the avoidance game. I could have been to Godric in an hour or two but I chose to fly across the Atlantic Ocean first. I needed to face Godric but I wasn't ready just yet. Dublin seemed the right place to start. Ireland is where my life started after all. I decided a trip down memory lane would let me process my life so far and give me time to prepare to face Godric. I wasn't sure if he wanted to see me, but I needed to see him, if nothing else to get some closure.

I made my way through the Irish customs, getting the usual odd look when I handed over my passport. "I know….Sean….my parents had a bad sense of humor , I did my usual pout and bat of my eyelashes, not needing to glamour. In the past I would have used a different name, but I didn't see why I should have to nowadays. I went to the motions of security and boarded the bus for Meath. This would be my starting point. I looked out at the scenery, the beautiful fields, hills and farmhouses, covered by the dark of the night sky to the average human. I remembered many of the land marks, although the people and house were new additions. I checked into a little B&B, listening to the middle aged Irish women take about the local tourist attractions, pretending to be interested.

The next morning I awoke to cocks crowing and the smell of bacon and sausage. My fangs dropped and I chuckled to myself. Blood or bacon, it was all the same to me, food was food. I got myself ready for the day, picking out jeans, a body skin, warm jumper and hiking boots. I tied my hair back in a messy bun and looked in the mirror. I'd pass for today. I didn't need the warmth or comfort of these clothes but I didn't want to attract attention with a young women walking in the damp cold weather in a sundress. Besides, I was a little vain too.

I did the hike at a slow speed, making my way to the hill of Tara in Meath. I sat on the grass and looked around, taking in the smells and sounds. This is where my life here began here, where I was thrown into this world. I know little of my life before.

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My first memory of my life before….well just before… is foggy and distorted. I'm not even sure how old I was. I just remember the fear, the loathing, the pain and a feeling of expectancy…. I didn't feel free, I felt trapped and terrified. I knew I'd been hurt but I think I've managed to block that part out. I could smell death and decay. I remember there was an old woman. I don't remember what she looked like but I remember kind sparkly eyes. She wasn't like me, caked in dirt and blood. She sort of glowed. I remember the sad look she gave me. "So young, too young, to be used, little babe. If I could send you away, would you go?"I remember nodding but not really understanding. I just heard "send you away". Anything seemed better than where I was. "I can send you away, but you can't come back. I'll let you take what you need to survive child. If you are the prey you can become the predator". The air around me changed, it filled with an energy I didn't recognize. "You will combine predator and prey, making you a creature to survive the night and day". I heard screaming, from other people. It was high pitched and anger, yet distant as I moved further and further away, like my body was pulled somehow. Next thing I remember I was spilled onto this earth, naked as a newborn, cold and hungry.

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I gave an involuntary shudder at the memory of how cold I felt. After another night at the B&B I set off again on a visitor's tour to take in the local area. It ended up being quite entertaining, especially the tour guide interpretation of the geographical land forms. The large rocks that apparently were deposited during the movement melting of the glaciers during the ice age were in fact, the result of one of my tantrums many many years ago, I'd been trying to hit a vampire. The swirls and designs that the Celtic people had etched into the walls of the Newgrange monument were in fact my handy work, when I found out I could run my nails through the stones like they were wet sand. You could say it was early vampire graffiti. My fit of giggles at that though got me a few odd looks from the other tourists. After the tour I made my way to the top of the Boyne, once again looking to the Hills of Tara. I sat on the grass just like I had done yesterday, and let my memories take hold…..