Hi everyone! I've been working on this story for a long time on and off. I wasn't sure if I was ever going to post it, but I got a sudden burst of inspiration and decided to finish it. I hope you like it!

Something Needs To Change

Growing up really wasn't all it was cracked up to be, or so thought a certain post-Marauder. Leaving the castle, leaving his family, didn't mean freedom. This wasn't freedom. This was a struggle, a curse; this was the real world.

Fighting constantly to keep a steady job, to keep a decent flat, was the supposed freedom that Mr. Remus Lupin now had to endure daily. As he learned quickly after leaving the beloved Hogwarts Castle, there weren't many people willing to hire a known werewolf.

Now, only six months after leaving the home of his parents, Remus found himself sharing a flat with his closest friend Sirius Black. Sirius who, on the other hand, could've had any job he wanted, if only he wanted one.

As Remus fought to keep enough money coming to afford their living space, Sirius spent his days at various bars wasting his inheritance on alcohol, when he assured his mate he was searching for a job. Something had changed the dark haired man, who was once cheerful and good-natured. Now, he seemed only distant and perplexing.

Nightly routines were always the same. Remus would return from work tired and hungry, to find a note upon the table or refrigerator, stating where Sirius had gone and when he'd be home. The notes were always lies, and Remus knew it. He'd ignore them, sitting at the table to a frozen meal.

After an hour or two of reading or writing to James and Lily, Remus would lock himself in his room, pretending to sleep, just to sit and wait for Sirius to return. He always knew when Sirius was home. He'd blunder through the house, drunk as humanly possible, to throw himself upon the couch or his bed in the room across from Remus', whichever one he could more easily reach.

Each night, it seemed Sirius would return later and later, and every night, Remus fell asleep with the memories of the Sirius he used to know and the warmth of liquified salt upon his cheeks.

One foggy Saturday night, for the first time in months, the nightly routine was ignored, forgotten. Having gotten off work early, Remus arrived at his flat in the back streets of London, to another of Sirius' notes upon the kitchen table. But, beside the note, was a letter addressed to him in an elegant script he recognized immediately as Lily Evans'.

Smiling at the pleasant surprise, Remus lifted the wheat colored envelope from the fabricated wood surface of the table, opening it carefully.

Dear Remus,

James and I have decided it's time we all got together. Peter will be coming to our flat around six, and we'd like it if you and Sirius joined us as well. It would be our pleasure to have three of our closest friends come to our home again. Like old times. You can owl us back, or else, we'll just expect you two around six, if that's at all possible.

I hope all is well for the both of you. Can't wait to see you again!

With all our love,

Lily and James

Remus returned the letter to the envelope, grinning broadly. It would be lovely to see James, Lily, and Peter again. Merlin knew, he missed them enough.

Then a thought occurred to him. Sirius had been invited as well, but Sirius wasn't here, and according to his note, he wouldn't be home for hours, as always. Remus peered at his watch apprehensively; 5 : 15. Bollocks.

Remus quickly dropped the letter, to rummage through his dresser for something nice to wear. There wasn't much of a variety, for Remus had not the money for new robes in quite some time. Figuring plain black would be good enough, Remus rushed into the bathroom for a quick shower and shave.

Owning no owl, he was unable to call ahead to James and Lily's flat, telling them of Sirius' absence. As he headed to the fire, preparing to floo to his destination, he reckoned it would only be fair to leave Sirius a note, for Sirius always left him one, even if they were always riddled with his petty lies.

Quickly scrawling his location and estimated time of return upon a scrap of parchment, Remus kindled a fire in the livingroom grate with a flick of his wand, before tossing in a handful of what looked like sand and stepping into the warm emerald flames that immediately erupted where red and orange had previously flickered merrily.

Closing his eyes while grasping his forehead gracefully, he shouted, "The Potter Residence!" Remus felt his body rotate, faster and faster, before coming to an abrupt stop in the kitchen of James and Lily.

"Remus!" A redheaded beauty exclaimed as she stood from the square kitchen table at which she, and a messy haired, bespectacled seventeen year old were waiting for him.

"Hello, Lily," Remus said pleasantly, as he stepped from the grate, dusting the ash from his robes. He strode forward, embracing his mate's fiancee in a lighthearted embrace, before turning to James himself. "Hey, James," he said in a more casual tone, "How've you been, mate?"

Also standing from his seat, James extended his arm to Remus, before replying in an undertone, "How do you think I've been? I'm living with Evans!" In retort to his comment, James received a shake of the head from Remus, and a playful slap on the arm from Lily.

They all took seats around the table, pouring some form of alcohol in expensive looking glasses, before speaking again.

"Remus," Lily began, placing her glass upon the table, "Where's Sirius?" She had just noticed his absence, wondering if he were coming later or maybe not at all.

The werewolf had avoided the subject of Sirius' absence since arriving, not wishing to speak of it. He didn't want to tell them where Sirius was, or what he was doing, for he didn't want to admit it to himself.

Not looking at either of his friends, Remus replied with an air of indifference, "He couldn't make it." Remus lifted his glass to his lips, sipping its contents, just for the sake of something to concentrate on.

"Oh," Lily said, clearly surprised. She could only imagine why Sirius couldn't come, but she thought it wise not to press the matter. She could tell it wasn't something Remus wished to discuss. "Well, Peter should be arriving shortly," she said cheerfully in attempts at a different course of conversation.

The three Hogwarts Graduates continued speaking, until joined by the fourth, Peter Pettigrew. All through their varied conversations, Remus' thoughts kept drifting to Sirius, and what he might be doing now.

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Mile End. It was a clearly dark pub in the outskirts of London often visited by Mr. Sirius Black. What with its wall-covering vines and gloomy, smokey interior, it wasn't a place for anyone wishing to stay sober.

Every night, before Remus returned to their flat after work, Sirius would leave a cock and bull note in the kitchen, telling him he'd gone out looking for a job. Sirius knew there was no point in leaving the notes anymore. He knew just as well as Remus that they were all lies. And yet, Remus never said a word, so Sirius never stopped leaving them.

Living with Remus Lupin was becoming increasingly difficult. Sirius couldn't even look at him anymore. He'd fallen so madly in love with the werewolf, it hurt to see him, and know those feelings would never be returned. Alcohol had been Sirius' escape when he was still in school, and now as a Post-Marauder, it was still his choice of breaking loose from the emotions, the tension, he hid from the world every damned day of his life.

Tonight, having already downed more than six Muggle beers and other assortments of Muggle liquor, Sirius had decided he was overdue for a lay. Tonight, he would bring the best looking bird he could find back to his flat. Remus should be sleeping when he got home; he always was. Or so Sirius was led to believe.

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"Shouldn't we be quiet?" said a tall brunette, quite loudly, as she stumbled into Sirius' flat, his arm wrapped around her waist, half holding her up, half trying to get her tight, fake leather halter top off.

Sirius laughed a sharp bark, as he led the girl down the short hallway and into the living room, pushing her upon the old, auburn couch before answering. "Nah, my roommate's asleep. He won't hear anything." With that, and a large smirk, Sirius lay himself upon the girl he'd brought ungraciously into his home.

He didn't even know her name, though he knew she'd said it to him sometime on the journey from Mile End to his flat. He vaguely tried to recall it as he pulled her shirt over her head, and set to work on her black lace bra. Merlin, he always hated those damned front clips. They were so bloody confusing.

The girl pulled Sirius' hands away from her black bra, with a soft, "Wait." His hands immediately went to the buttons of her jean mini skirt as she unhooked the bra for him, a satisfied grin upon her red glossed lips. She was more than likely still trying to figure out how she'd gotten into the home of such an undeniably gorgeous man.

Sirius looked up at her hungrily, though he'd never been one for breasts. The fact that he wasn't exactly a typical heterosexual man probably played a big part in that. Pulling himself up with his arms, Sirius brought his lips to hers, laying his body over hers, as her freckled arms entwined around his back, pulling at his shirt, silently begging him to take it off, as he ravaged her mouth with his own.

A small smile pulled ever so lightly at the corners of Sirius' mouth. He loved the feeling of being wanted, even if, in all technicalities, he was merely being used, as was the woman beneath him. He pulled his lips from those below his, quickly pulling off his shirt with one hand, before bringing his warm flesh back to the soft creamy skin of the brunette. She sighed in contentment at the feeling of his skin upon hers, and Sirius couldn't help but smirk once more, before placing his lips, none too gently, back on the woman's.

A lock clicked as a moan escaped quivering lips. A doorknob turned as a mouth wandered. An orgasm hit as jaw was dropped.

"SIRIUS!" came a scream, though it wasn't in pleasure, nor was it female. That, was the shocked cry of a certain roommate Sirius believed to be sleeping down the hall. Remus stood frozen at the end of the hallway, staring at the scene before him. A bloody half naked girl between Sirius' legs. Remus didn't know what to do. He couldn't move, nor could he look away, though the sight before him was enough to raise the bile in his throat.

Still panting, Sirius turned his head quickly at the sound. His eyes widened considerably as he stared into the tormented eyes of the lycanthrope. Sirius knew very well that he'd screwed up beyond forgiveness this time.

"Remus. . . ." he attempted to explain slowly, as the brunette began scrambling around for her clothes, just now realizing something unenjoyable may be about to happen between the two men in her company. Quickly, she slipped back into her shirt, leaving her bra forgotten over the back of the couch. She hurried past the still-paralyzed werewolf, and was swiftly out the door.

Sirius had no idea what he was going to say. What could he say? Sure, this wasn't the first time he'd brought a bird back to the flat, but he'd never once been walked in on in the past six months he'd been living with Remus. This was going to get ugly; Sirius could feel it.

Just as soon as the woman left the apartment, Remus' blood started to boil. If he didn't put as much distance between himself and Sirius as he possibly could, he couldn't even imagine what kinds of regretful things he may say. Glaring fit to kill, Remus spoke in a tone he had to fight to keep under control. "Fuck you, Sirius." With that, Remus stormed across the living room, not giving Sirius so much as a backward glance, before he slammed the door to his room and magically sealed it from the man on the other side.

"Remus. . . ." Sirius whispered, his face downcast as he half-heartedly reached for his discarded clothing. For the first time in all the months he'd spent in this shit hole of a home, Sirius had never felt so disgusted with himself.

Bringing his hands to his head, Sirius drew his fingers through his ebony locks and pulled tight. Frustration didn't even begin to cover what he was feeling right now. There was only one thing he could do now. Picking himself up from the couch, he buckled his trousers, leaving his shirt where it lay upon the thin carpeted floor.

"Remus!" he called with a hint of desperateness, through the magically sealed door of his mate's room, "Remus, please let me in!" He knocked repeatedly, vaguely satisfied to find the door didn't have an imperturbable spell upon it; that at least meant Remus could hear him, and merely chose to ignore him.

After what seemed like hours of repeated rhythmic beating of knuckles on wood, the door clicked and flew open as though a tornado had unsuccessfully tried to rip it off its hinges. Sirius' eyes widened; To say Remus was mad at him would've been the understatement of the century.

"Remus, I'm-"

"Don't," said werewolf's voice cut the animagus off, venom lacing his every word. "Don't apologize for what you've done tonight, Sirius. It's not like you haven't done it before." There was a mocking tone making itself known in Remus' furious speech. "It's not like I haven't lain on this bed in this damned room every single damned night, listening to you stumbling down the hallway with a new girl on your arm. It's not like you haven't openly shagged every bird who would have you since we moved in here. It's not like you haven't forgotten about your supposed best mate, and it's certainly not like any apology you give me can fix any of what you've done, Sirius!"

This was the exact reason Remus hadn't wanted Sirius to enter his room. He hadn't wanted to blow up like that; it was very un-Remus like. He was always calm, cool, collected, but tonight, seeing Sirius with that stupid, stupid bird had set him off. He couldn't control himself any longer.

Sirius stood in the doorway, frozen as Remus' words left his lips like drops of poison from a snake's fangs. What hit him hardest was the truth behind them. They were all true; every last one. And no, Sirius couldn't apologize for what he'd done. A simple apology wouldn't be enough, far from it.

So instead, Sirius took a tentative step forward, closing the door behind him and did the most irrational thing that came to mind.

"I love you, Remus," he said just loud enough for the werewolf to hear him, as he continued moving towards the bed on which the tawny man sat, arms crossed upon his chest.

For the second time that day, Remus' jaw dropped because of Sirius. "What?" he said quietly, though a scornful eye still watched the man across from him and a bitter tone still stained his tongue.

Sirius took a deep breath, dragging a hand through his hair once more. He said not a word before coming to sit upon the old bowing metal bed upon which Remus was already seated, having stumbled backwards upon it at Sirius' sudden confession. "I love you," he said, louder and more confidently. "I've loved you for as long as I can remember."

Remus laughed a uncharacteristic, cold, mirthless laugh. "No," he said forcefully, a sarcastic smile still dancing across his thin pale lips. "No, you don't."

"I do, Remus!" Sirius said, his words as desperate as his charcoal eyes. He had to make Remus understand; Remus had to believe him.

"No, Sirius!" Remus roared, rising from the bed angrily and slamming his fist into the wall before of him, "No, you bloody don't, you fucking bastard!" Remus shouted, his anger finally breaking through in full blast. "People who love each other don't do the things you've done to me! People who love each other are faithful, Sirius! Like I've been to you since the cursed day we bloody met!"

Remus knew just as well as Sirius that they had never dated, hence giving Sirius no reason to be faithful to him, and yet, the animagus knew exactly what Remus meant and precisely why the lycanthrope was so angry with him. He hadn't been faithful to his own feelings.

Looking down at his folded hands, Sirius muttered, "I know, Moony. I know."

As the sounds of the once often used nickname reached Remus' ears, his anger almost melted away. It had been ages since Sirius had called him Moony. It brought back the memories of school, of the Sirius he'd once loved; the Sirius who had attended Hogwarts with him and even shared a dormitory with him. These memories seemed to chase the fury from Remus' mind.

Taking a step back towards the bed, subconsciously rubbing the knuckles he'd just slammed into the already cracked sheet rock, the werewolf spoke quietly, "Sirius, what do you want from me?" It wasn't a question, but more of a soft-worded demand.

The animagus looked up at Remus from behind his ebony locks, seeing nothing but pain on the werewolf's beautiful face. "I want you to love me, Remus," he stated quietly, knowing very well that what he wanted wasn't only impossible but unfair. How could he ask Remus to love him when he'd done nothing but hurt him for the past six months?

Remus remained silent for several seconds, before laughing weakly as he shook his head in a sort of pathetic disbelief. "I already do, Sirius," he whispered as he brought his hand to Sirius' chin, lifting it from it's downcast position.

Waves of shock barreled through the astounded Black. So much emotion came with those three words that it sent prickles down his spine and a lump rose in his throat. It blocked any words that may have come forth, had he known any to say.

"Sirius," Remus whispered. "I love you more than anything on this earth, but I need answers if you want me to do anything about it." The realization that Sirius loved him had come as quite a shock to the werewolf, but there was something in Sirius' confession that led Remus to believe it without question. Now was the time to finally do something about it, but first, he needed to know a few things.

Sirius looked into the molten eyes of the one beside him, hardly able to believe what he was hearing. After everything Sirius had put him through, he was still willing to take Sirius as his own. "Anything, Rem. I'll tell you anything you want to know." He was desperate for this; he had wanted this for so many years. He'd do anything to finally have it.

After a deep breath, Remus began his questioning. "Why do you have sex with every girl you can get, if you're in love with me?"

"Because I couldn't have you."

"Why did you never tell me about your feelings?" Remus continued after a short nod.

"Because I thought you would reject me."

"If given the chance, would you be faithful to me?" he inquired, desperately wanting to receive an honest answer to this question in particular. It would undoubtedly decide whether their relationship could be taken to the next level or be left to strictly friendship.

"Completely. I'd never touch another bird again."

Remus chuckled. He couldn't quite believe that, but he did believe that Sirius would try. "Do me three things, Sirius, and I'm yours," he stated boldly, secretly ecstatic that the fact that after so many years of ignoring his feelings for Sirius, he was finally doing something about it. He never thought he'd get the courage to do so.

Sirius looked at him longingly, anxiously, silently assuring him that he would indeed do anything for him.

"First," Remus began sternly, holding up his index finger before him, "You have to stop drinking and find yourself a job." Sirius nodded. "Second, you are to be honest with me. No more lies, Sirius." Sirius nodded again, a pang of guilt shooting through his heart. "And lastly, you have to promise to love me, Sirius. And not like all your girls."

"Done, Rem," Sirius said, nodding furiously, as he grasped Remus' hands in his own, doing his best to push back the lump in his throat. "All of it - done."

Remus felt like dancing. He wasn't sure why he believed Sirius or if he even could believe Sirius, but at the moment, he sure as hell wanted to. He needed to. Even if only just for now. "All right," he replied, showing his satisfaction of Sirius' answer.

"Can I now make a request from you, Moony?" Sirius questioned tentatively, hoping the use of the nickname would keep Remus from anymore anger tonight. To Sirius' great gratification, Remus nodded slowly. "Would you kiss me, Rem?" It was the most blatant statement he had every made, and yet, he couldn't think of any better way to ask.

"Would you like me to answer that, or just show you?" Remus replied, smiling mischievously. Without waiting for an answer, he lifted himself from the mattress, dragging Sirius up with him. He put his hands on Sirius' bare shoulders, as he brought their lips together, in what was the most magnificent kiss of either of their lives. For the very first time, both boys were kissing someone they truly loved, and nothing could possibly be better than that.

After several passionate seconds, they broke apart. Sirius' hands now resided on Remus' back and Remus' fingers had woven themselves into the ebony tresses above the pale shoulders they'd previously resided on.

"Things are gonna change, Rem," Sirius promised, "I'm gonna change."

Remus rested his head on Sirius' chest, smiling lightheartedly, as he allowed his eyes to close. "I know, Padfoot." With that, he lifted his head, replaced his lips to their previous occupation, whispering quietly. "Let's deal with that in the morning."

Taking the hint, Sirius led Remus back to the bed they had previously been seated on, a devilish grin upon his lips as they claimed Remus' once more.

There you go! Review and tell me if you like it!

Prongsie :)