"-oro? Oi, Zoro!"
Startling awake at the sound of his name, Zoro jolts upright in his seat, coming dangerously close to launching the ink well and quill off the mapping desk and scattering the pages on which he'd been drafting a letter before he'd decided to close his eye for what he swears could only have been a minute or two. From the new position of the shadows on the observation room floor, however, it looks as though he's been dozing for at least an hour.
He rubs the heel of his right hand against his face, scrubbing away the remnants of sleep- and groans when his palm comes away streaked with black. "Ah, fuck…" Glancing down, he sees the uppermost sheet of parchment's sporting a sizeable damp spot in which that portion of his missive's so badly smudged, the words are barely legible. Must've been drooling in my sleep.
"You got ink all over that side of your face," Luffy states helpfully from where he's hovering just outside swinging range, a precaution that stings Zoro's pride even though HE'S the one who's insisted on it since the recent resurgence of the nightmares that've had him on edge for the last month or so.
His expression must betray at least a little of his chagrin, because his captain immediately closes the distance between them, moving behind the chair to slide both arms around his shoulders and give them a gentle reassuring squeeze. "How's Zoro feeling?"
"Alright, I guess. A little tired."
They both know this is an enormous understatement given the dark circles beneath his eyes and the fact he's been nodding off far more often than usual, but Luffy lets the white lie go unchallenged for the moment, leaning farther forward to nuzzle his neck and pierced earlobe affectionately. "Maybe we could go take a real nap, in bed 'n everything, after Grandpa leaves."
"… that's today? Shit."
"It's gonna be okay, Zoro."
"What if he tries to- I don't know- hug me or something? Isn't that the kind of thing people do when they find out that-" The swordsman shifts uncomfortably. "I mean, isn't that what they do in situations like this?"
"We'll be in the dining hall, on the opposite side of the table." Luffy promises. "He's not gonna jump over it 'n grab you."
"I hope not, 'cause if he does, I might just-"
"Zoro, NO," the rubber man interrupts, grimacing, clearly flashing back to the day earlier this week when he'd ended up on his hands and knees scrubbing their bedroom carpet. "Please don't barf on Grandpa."
"I wouldn't do it ON PURPOSE," Zoro protests, turning to glare at him. "I NEVER do it on purpose; it just- happens. I'd rather not be throwing up AT ALL, let alone ON anybody."
He instantly regrets his choice of words at Luffy's crestfallen expression. "Oi oi, I didn't mean it like that, okay?" Reaching up to take his lover's hands in his own, he inclines his head to press a kiss against the corner of his downturned mouth. "I'm okay with this, Sencho. Really."
That troubled look's his own fault, he knows- a result of him reacting so horribly to Chopper's news. He'd been furious, not to mention a little terrified, and unfortunately Luffy had learned about everything at the same time as most of their other crew mates, because Zoro had started yelling the moment he'd stepped out of the infirmary and found his gaze falling on the person he deemed responsible for his dilemma.
He'd yelled- a lot- and he'd also spent two nights sleeping in the crow's nest, too upset to even contemplate sharing the bed in their quarters, as well as avoiding all but the briefest interactions with anyone else.
His absence, albeit brief, had thrown the ship into chaos.
Nami had ultimately restored the peace by cornering him in the aquarium bar and loudly reminding him that he'd been a willing participant in the activities that'd landed him in this predicament, then telling him to get over himself, make an educated decision, and- most importantly- "DO SOMETHING ABOUT LUFFY BEFORE HE DRIVES EVERYONE BLOODY INSANE."
Eventually the swordsman had calmed down enough that the fish frightened by his responding outburst began to reemerge from the live tank decor in which they'd been hiding, and he'd grudgingly taken the navigator's advice, spending another hour or so alone in serious contemplation before heading off in search of his captain.
Together, they'd puzzled out the likeliest timeline judging by their most recent mishap and taken the information to Chopper in hopes of plotting out the next few months.
I still can't believe I managed to get fucking knocked up right after I defeated Mihawk, Zoro thinks for what must be the hundredth time. Maybe even the same goddamn night. It seems ridiculous, but the timing's pretty much perfect and-
He feels his face heating. He'd been giddy as hell, practically inebriated with achieving his goal, and Luffy hadn't been thinking too clearly either, and although Zoro's certain he remembers a condom being used during the FIRST round, well- it'd been a long night, and they'd both been extremely enthusiastic, and neither of them can recall if a condom was used EVERY time.
They've forgotten before, and they've also had prophylactics unexpectedly break or come off several times over the last five years, but in the past it's never amounted to anything. The first time, he'd been horrified, convinced he'd been figuratively screwed in addition to being literally screwed, but when life had proceeded as usual, that time as well as after the handful of other occasions on which they'd slipped up, he'd started to worry less and had stopped noting such events in his journal. Choices he's since found cause to regret. Mostly- now that he's accepted the current circumstances- because he might've anticipated the results of his test and not freaked out quite so spectacularly, had he paid better attention to detail and recorded the night of his victory over his former mentor as a possible contraceptive blunder.
And Luffy might not be looking at him with such uncertainty in his eyes.
"Oi, like I said, we're good," he murmurs, tugging his captain around to haul him over the chair's arm into his lap. "C'mere."
"Ah, is Zoro sure he should be-"
"I'm FINE." The swordsman growls, although he's smiling a bit at the way his partner's shifting and peering anxiously between them, obviously worried about putting too much pressure on his abdomen. "Look, Sencho, I can't promise I won't puke on your grandfather, but I can promise I'll TRY not to. I'd PREFER not to, mostly 'cause it's nasty but also 'cause- well, he's family, right?"
He's rewarded for this statement by Luffy's hesitant smile stretching into a broad grin.
"Thanks, Zoro, for being okay with him visiting." The rubber man cups his jaw in both hands and kisses him firmly. "It means a lot to me 'n Ace."
"Mmm. I can't say I'm thrilled with the whole former Vice Admiral thing, but… I trust you. And if you're okay with him, that's good enough for me."
"I'm glad, I mean, he's gonna be SO excited when he finds out he's gonna have TWO great grandkids instead of just ONE."
"I can't wait," Zoro mutters. "Oh, and by the way-?"
"Eh?"
The first mate reaches over to seize the quill and hastily dip it in the ink well so he can doodle a huge, sloppy mustache beneath Luffy's nose. "You got ink on YOUR face now too."