Back to the Innocence

by Tara Kitaide

-07 Movie Version- Thinking about it doesn't hurt and I don't regret a thing. If I had to, I would go back and do it all again. -Starscream centric-

1. Chapter 1

I'm tired of doing these things so I've asked Starscream to do the disclaimer for me.
Starscream: (warps in) She don't own nuffin. (warps out)
I love it when he does those for me. I know a certain special bot that's now gonna receive a nice hot wax for his efforts. Now, onto the story!

Update: The begining is officially typed out! So everyone knows, same as before, this i smainly for me and my friends. Anyone can read it and understand it though. Renji Abarai is the hot-headed smexy redhead dude from Bleach. :3 I love him.

Warning: MUSHY MECH LOVE AHEAD!

Thinking back on it now doesn't hurt. Even when I think of all I lost and all I could have done, I don't regret it. For those many months, I had a friend. He was a good friend too. Now I realize I'll never meet anyone like him again, none the less him himself. That simple fact does hurt a little but not as much as the reason; I'm an idiot. It's all my fault and it will always be my fault. I could have gotten through to him. Lord knows I tried but as I said before, I don't regret a single thing.

Thinking about him doesn't hurt anymore. I find that I can't get through the day without thinking of his face. And if I ever say his name or start to talk about him, no one speaks. They all just hang their heads and let me ramble . Sometimes they might even cry. They were his friend too after all...

I can't start from the beginning. That would take too long and it's been awhile so my mind is fuzzy on the details. All I can recall his his face as of late. His voice is so distant when I try to think of it now. Knowing this, I will start to tell you the adventures I had not too long ago. I would hardly call them adventures per say but for lack of a better term, this is indeed what we shall call them.

I'll begin by re-capping what I do remember. I think I hardly need to remind you about the attack on Mission city. I'd say it's been about a year since then. My tale begins a little less then a month before those events. I had come into contact with a mech by the name of Starscream. I'm sure you've heard about him by now. The government isn't really working to keep the "Alien Incidents" secret anymore. Any information leaked is just denied but more and more people are starting to sight our robot friends.

Anyway, my first meeting with Starscream wasn't what you would call normal. Then again, when has any meeting with a giant transforming alien robot ever been considered normal? There aren't many recorded encounters so I wouldn't know but I can definitely tell you it wasn't average. For instance, fearing for your life. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't Starscream I was scarred of. Believe it or not, he saved me and if any of you have ever met him then you know that's very out of character for a mech like him.

I was forced to this god-awful state, Ohio, by my mother when I was fifteen. I'm originally from Florida so I can tell you I wasn't taking kindly to this hick town known as Wellston. It's residents weren't the most conductive lightning rods in the circuit if you know what I mean. Amazingly, though, it was were I met Starscream. I guess I'm a little thankful for it now... Well, because we live in a hick country town, there were many wooded areas around my home. I wont lie to you; I'm from the city. This means I don't jump at the thought of going outside where it's cold and there's nothing around for miles. In Florida I could walk where ever I wanted. That doesn't hold true here. So, being the city girl I am, I went walking around the woods. It had been a relatively warm summer day (for once) so I took advantage of it. I wasn't expecting an F-22 to come crashing down near where I was exploring.

If you don't know, an F-22 is a fighter jet used by the Military. They're the sleekest, fastest, baddest jets around. You definitely don't want to get caught in one of it's deadly assaults. Me, being the curious city-girl that I am, went further and checked out the plane crash. After all, someone could be hurt or worse. What I found, though, was not a wounded pilot and a broken plane. It was indeed though, you guessed it, Starscream.

I gasped because that's what you do when you're surprised. It must have startled him too because he quickly turned, guns at the ready. When he did though, it knocked over several large trees that dwarfed even him. After all he was a giant robot and he didn't have much room to maneuver. As you probably also guessed, those trees were toppling my way. It was then that Starscream blocked them with his massive body, saving me from a crushing fate (pun intended).

Okay, so maybe it was his fault I was in danger, but he saved me and I was grateful. I can't tell you much of what happened after that, only that we became friends and he began to trust me. I offered him a place to stay here. A friend I made up here, Beth, and I had discovered an old barn behind my house deep in the woods. It was easy for him to stay there in his Alt-Mode considering the barn was bigger then most.

He told me about the Autobot and Decepticon war on his home planet and all about his leader who had become corrupt with power. You see, this civil war use to be a political one. The Decepticons, the group Starscream was with, wanted equality for those in poor Cities like Vos (where he came from) and Kaon. If you were from influential cities like Iacon or Altihex then you automatically received all the rights a mech was entitled to. To quote Spider Man, "With great power comes great responsibility". I guess the Decepticon leader, Megatron, never heard of that quote before. He quickly became a tyrant. He wanted the power of the All-Spark, a mechanism with the power to breath life into machines, to transform earth's technology and take over the universe. Sounds kind of far fetched so far, huh? That's what I thought too. All Starscream wanted was to overthrow Megatron to get their cause back on track.

Then came the attack on Mission city. Megatron had been revived only to be defeated by a human boy named Sam. That's how I ended up meeting the other Autobots and the humans that helped them. They were surprised I had been hiding a Decepticon, especially one like Starscream. They told me he was Megatron's second in command and I wasn't surprised. This will sound odd but I'd fallen in love with Starscream over that short month. He was close to me like family and when he suddenly disappeared after the attack, I was empty.

Despite that, though, I carried on. I allied myself with the remaining Autobots on earth. I met their leader, Optimus Prime, and the others. Soon, there were even more Autobots from all over the galaxy coming to earth! All of that lasted about two months. Then, out of nowhere, Starscream came back.

Again I was shocked, and again I helped him. I kept him in the same place, in secret, just as before but pressure began to weigh heavy on me. I knew I'd have to tell someone eventually, most likely Beth, and the day was steadily approaching.

This is where I will start my tale. It begins with one of the last spectacular moments I held with Starscream. I can tell you that this night lives in my memory, in crystal detail, even now. Even if I were to live as long as God, I wouldn't forget it. This is where I will begin – with the prelude to the beginning of the end.

-/-/-/-

It was now winter in Southern Ohio and very cold. I can guarantee, it never got this cold in Florida. Some nights it was bellow ten degrees or worse. It was definitely harsh on me, but as Beth had said, my blood was thickening out. I barely noticed the icy sting on my toes anymore. I could even stand Twenty to Thirty degree weather better then when I first arrived. The snow, though, is one thing I'd never get use to.

That night had been particularly slow and lazy. It was Friday and I had to pick my friend up from the airport tomorrow. My good, best, and long-time friend Brianna was coming to visit. It would be the first time I'd seen her since the move so I was rather excited. As usual, I was typing away at my computer when a light tap on my window made me jump.

"Kid, It's me." A scratchy but oh-so familiar voice called. "Want to go out for a bit?"

I smiled and reached behind my computer desk to pull back my curtain. As I expected, Starscream was leaning down, peering through my window with those red optics of his. I laughed a little and nodded. It was like Starscream to show up sometimes out of the blue like this and want to go out flying. His class was known as a Seeker and they loved to fly. Telling him not to was like me telling you not to breath. He just couldn't live without the sky.

I gestured to him to hold on before drawing back the curtain and slipping my shoes on. Quickly I grabbed a wool blanket and my Renji plushie. Where ever Starscream was taking me, I knew it had to be outside in one of the great forests covering the foot hills. There wasn't a building around here he'd fit in (save for my barn) and even then It's not like he could have taken me out to eat or anything. Not only that, but no one knew about him being around here. Not even my mom knew. After all, she's the last person I'd ever tell.

Starscream blinked at the Red plushie in my hands and asked, "Why are you bringing that?" I shrugged but the truth was I didn't want to go out without Renji. I imagine if he were here, he'd want to go as well. It was so beautiful tonight.

"So where are we headed, Star?" I asked smiling as I crawled out the window. That was always my favorite nickname for him; "Star".

"I found a place I thought you'd like. It's not too far from here and there aren't any humans to get in the way so I wanted to take you." He explained in his normal scratchy voice. "You were saying you wanted to do something together, right?"

"That I did." Soon I worked my body through the small opening of my window before closing it after me. When we were in our secret clearing in the forest, Starscream transformed into his awesome F-22 jet form and I crawled in the cockpit. With a "swish" the top came down and I strapped myself in. "Ready for take off, Star!"

Without a word we descended up into the night sky and I sighed. The earth was so beautiful up here. Normally I wouldn't be able to stand flying but when I was with Starscream, I felt fine. He turned slightly on his side when turning, making me gasp. I got a clear view of the ground and tried to make out where Beth's house would be from here.

"Are you doing okay?" Starscream asked.

"Yeah, I'm good." I nodded. "Are we there yet?"

"Almost." He chuckled.

True to his word, we were there within minutes. Slowly he lowered me to the forest bellow on one of the large foothills of Ohio. I jumped out onto the hilled surface, Renji in hand. After I was a safe distance, he whirled and buzzed as he transformed back into his avian robot form. I don't care what anyone said, Starscream was amazing. Not even Sam or Optimus could tell me otherwise.

Like the gentleman he is, he put out his hand and I climbed slowly onto it. I wrapped my blanket around myself and settled into the crook of his arm when he folded it over his torso. My head leaned against the warm plating that covered Starscream's spark. While the rest of him was cold, his chest was always warm. I snuggled into it and looked up at the brilliant night sky.

"Star, this is amazing!" I breathed. "I don't see these many even near my house!"

"I know." He didn't smile but I could hear it in his voice. "I found this place the other night while I was out scouting. I knew you would like it."

I nodded. "Of course. I like anything you share with me Starscream. You're important to me and I like being with you."

While Transformers can't blush, I could tell Star was flattered by the way he put a hand to his face and scratched it timidly. "Thanks..."

"Mm." I hummed and continued to look up at him while he gazed at the stars. Starscream was truly magnificent. The thousands upon thousands of stars glistened and reflected off his armor, creating thousands more. "Beautiful." I sighed to myself. It was no more then a whisper but Starscream, with his amazing audio receptors, caught it.

"Did you say something?" Starscream looked down at me with beautiful red optics.

"No." I lied. "Nothing important. Just... thinking to myself is all." Well now that wasn't a total lie.

He said nothing and instead turned back to the stars. I briefly wondered if he did in fact hear me but it didn't matter. He knew I thought of him as stunning anyhow. How could anyone not? Every time he flew, transformed, spoke, or even fought, I was captivated by him. Damn anyone that says otherwise. Starscream is amazing in ever sense of the word. His sleek metallic skin was always flawless and waxed thanks to yours truly. His hawk-like mask was stunning and hid and even more beautiful face. I didn't care that his voice was scratchy, I liked it. I know it wasn't always like that, that it had a smoothness to it long ago, but I don't care. The Starscream here and now was the one I cherished. This Starscream was the one I...

"Hey, Star?" I called.

Starscream looked down at me with an unreadable expression and responded. "Yes?"

"Well..." I nestled further into his spark and sighed. "This spark of yours... It's your heart, isn't it?"

"Yes." He nodded, confused at what I was getting at. I couldn't blame him. "Our sparks are not only our life force but our soul. Our memory banks and CPUs could be wiped clean several times but we'd always come back as long as our spark remained. We may not have memories of anyone but the way we reacted to them and felt about them would remain the same."

"I see." I nodded. If his memory was gone, and he didn't remember me, would he still act like this with me? Would he still reserve this side on himself for only me? This kind, gentle, sweet Starscream... would his spark remember me? "Your spark is how you bond and find your mate, isn't it?"

"Yes." He said again. "While we can try and love another bot, if our spark does not react with theirs then it's not meant to be. When you find your bond mate, you know." He paused and looked from me to the ground. "I've... never experienced it but I hear it's like your spark is burning. When you don't bond, your spark yearns to be near that person." Again he paused to look back at me. "You see, when we're created and our spark is activated, your spark is... programed for another person, a bond mate. You know the person the moment you meet them too because your sparks react and you can feel it." He put a hand to his head and sighed. "I think I already said that." He grinned. "I'm just droning on and on now, Sorry."

"No." I shook my head. "I was listening, Star. It's fascinating. You see, our human hearts are very much the same."

Star quirked his head. "Oh? Really now?"

"Yes. Well... sort of." I smiled. "I mean, our hearts aren't preprogrammed or anything... that is unless you believe in that. Humans are complex organisms that not even we fully understand. Fear, Happiness, Sorrow, Love... a lot believe these things are felt with your heart but I don't see how that can be. They say emotions are chemicals released in the brain. Did you know that?"

"Of course. I was a scientist but I'm still a genius." He chuckled.

I giggled and nodded. "Yes of course. How could I forget? But anyhow..." I snuggled more into the crevice of his arm and hugged Renji. "Just as you have your bond mates, we have our soul mates. The problem though is that our hearts will trick us into thinking we have found our soul mate. Our hearts aren't like your spark and instantly react to one another. Not many times will you find instant chemistry with people. Even then our hearts can deceive us into thinking we've found 'the one' only to have it thrust back into our faces a few months or so later." I paused and thought briefly of all the people I've ever thought I "loved". I was young and unwise unlike now. "So we have to be careful." I sighed. "It's not easy but when you do find your soul mate, and realize they're so, it's a wonderful feeling." I looked up at him and smiled. "Or so I've heard."

"I see." He nodded, intrigued. "And has your heart ever tricked you?"

I nodded and looked away from his beautiful optics. "Yes." I whispered, knowing he could hear me. "Many times."

"Does it... hurt every time?"

I closed my eyes and held Renji tighter. "Yes. Every time. I've found it's better to just ignore and forget as of late but sometimes the connection is too strong." I looked down in the face of the adorable plush that kept it's permanent smirk. "Sometimes our hearts even will us to be with those that... don't exist... or never have."

Starscream's massive claw came up and gently stroked the side of my face. I put a hand to it and sighed. He was such a wonderful bot. He carefully touched Renji, as not to tear him, and tapped the plush. "Your heart wills to be with his?"

"Yes." I muttered. "But I know that isn't even within any realm of possibility. Renji is... not real. Just a cartoon and a good one at that. He gives me strength though. I worry for him too like I would someone I knew. I... I feel like I do know him. I feel like I've known him my whole life no matter how ridiculous that is."

"It isn't." He reassured me by touching my face again. "It seems my spark and your heart aren't so different. We can't control either of them. We can't control who they lead us to, they just do." He rubbed my hair and I felt tears in my eyes which were quickly willed away.

We stayed like that for awhile. It was comforting to have him here. There was only one other person in the world that truly ever understood this odd logic of mine but they were far away in Florida where I longed to return to. My mother couldn't possibly understand either. She knew I loved Renji but that's as much information she got. I made the mistake of telling her about Wolfwood and why I wore his cross all the time. She more or less told me he wasn't real so it didn't matter. I never had wanted to slap her so hard in my entire life. Not even when she said my father was burning in hell, although I hate her for that too. My brother was understanding and I did love him but I know he thought the same. He wasn't one for sympathy or understanding or even emotion. A kitten could be dieing at his feet and he wouldn't cry. Not even my biological father is that stone hearted.

"Hey, Star?" I didn't look up at him but opened my eyes.

"Yes, Tara?"

I cringed at my name. God, I hate my name but it sounded so wonderful coming from him. "Do you think... well, as a scientist you'll find this stupid." I sighed.

"No, tell me." He went from stroking my hair to my face. His claw was cool against my heating skin.

"Well this is really stupid but... well do you think... I mean... Can humans and... well Transformers for lack of a better word... do you think that you and humans can... can bond?" There, I said it. It took a long ass babbling time but I said it. Well, I actually ended up speeding through the last bit. God, it's such a stupid thing to ask. I almost hoped he didn't hear me.

"If we can bond?" He blinked his ruby optics and hummed. "You mean like the way I would with another mech?"

I nodded, too embarrassed to look at him, speak, or let him see my face.

"That's not possible." He said simply. "When we bond, we unite the sparks in our chest together and well... imagine how that would be for a human? It's not like you can open up your chest to your heart and bond with us. We can love humans though like we would any other being or mech."

"Oh..." I uttered. Why did my heart sink? Of course we couldn't bond! That's absurd! I really am a hopeless idiot. Leave it to me to get excited and hopeful over something so stupid. I really wish I was born on Cybertron as a mech, though. Maybe then me and Starscream...

"Hey, are you getting sleepy? Should we head back?" Starscream asked. I looked up at him and shook my head stupidly, muttering "let's stay a little longer". "Okay." He smiled and my heart melted again.

What was I thinking? I'm insain to be thinking this way. I'm just some sixteen year old teenage brat while Starscream is many stellar cycles old. Not only that but for God's sake, he was a giant alien robot from a planet eons away! He was so warm though and so sweet. God, is he sweet. I really wish I was born a Cybertronian.

"Starscream?" I looked up at him and realized his eyes had never left me. It made me shiver to think he had been watching me. "I... I'm really glad I met you." I muttered. My eyes couldn't lock onto his optics, I was too nervous. "I'm glad I can rely on you. I'm glad you're here."

He smiled and I couldn't help but look at his face. Slowly I watched as his hawk-like mask whirled back and hid behind the armor plating of his neck. He didn't remove his face mask though and I knew why. Long ago he told me about how Megatron damaged his vocal processors for talking back. Without his mask it was almost impossible to hear him. I knew I wouldn't be able to with my tiny human ears but God.

He was gorgeous, as warped as that sounds. I thought so every time he took off his mask. He looked human if you could believe that. I could see his wonderful optics so clearly and sighed as he touched my face again. He kept smiling and slowly I lifted a hand to touch his massive hand again.

"Thank you." He whispered although a whisper to him is as clear as a scream to me when we're this close. "You're the only human that's truly... accepted me here or even really liked me."

"Liar." I smiled and closed my eyes. "Mikaela likes you."

"Yes, well, she is still scared of me. I can sense it every time I'm near." He sighed.

"That's understandable." Even though it was wrong, I felt a little bad. I knew Starscream first and honestly, I didn't want to share him with anybody, much less Mikaela. That girl was older then me, prettier then me, curvier, bustier, funner, and funnier... I was so afraid Starscream would look at the two of us and see what a flawed human girl I am. I don't want him to hate me or see I'm ugly. Of the few humans he's had contact with, I know I'm the least attractive. Hell, even Sam's mother has more style then I do. He's always stayed with me though and I can't understand why.

"Star, you know I'd do anything for you, right?" I asked childishly.

"Of course." He nodded.

"Good." I smiled. "Because I really would."

I had to remind him about how much I love him. I didn't think he would forget but I had instill it in his Central Processing Unit. I wasn't a naturally selfish person and that still holds true today. I'd already given up so much that I had to let myself indulge in this one thing. I'd given up my home, my friends, my birth place... I could even have gone back too. All it would take is one phone call from my dad and I'd be gone in a few days. I don't know why I didn't. Some of it had to do with my mother and brother but most was for the friends I made here and Starscream. I wouldn't be able to hide Starscream in Crystal River... So I didn't want him to forget. I didn't want one of the only people, human or otherwise, that ever cared for me this much to forget about me or hate me. Especially hate me...

"I love you, Star." I muttered as I began to feel drowsy. It had been a long and hard day. "I love you so much. I'd do anything for you. You're so important to me, if anything happened to you I think I'd die."

I buried my face in his warm chest, not wanting to look at those painfully stunning optics again or see that amazing face. He and Renji were so much the same with their ruby eyes and fantastic smile. This was hard. So freaking hard... Why did my heart always yearn for others I just couldn't have? The answer was simple; I'm an idiot.

Then he said something so amazing that I remember it to this day. "I love you too." He sighed and touched my hair. "You're important to me too and... I never thought I'd say this to a human but I'd die protecting you."

Please don't. I thought. I don't want you to die even for me. I'm not worth it...

"I'm glad you found me that day. I'm glad I... I'm glad I stayed on earth... with you." The arm I was nestled in tightened slightly around me and I felt my heart sore. "Thank you." Was all I could say and for each star in the sky, I repeated it; Then and a thousand times over. It would never be enough.

-/-/-/-

"Tara-chan!"

I noticed the high pitched squeal and face instantly as soon as it came into view through the crowd. My over energetic friend bound after me and threw her arms around me, causing a scene, but neither of us cared. It had been too long since we'd seen each other last.

"Bri-chan." I smiled when we let go of each other. "How have you been?"

"Great but not as great since I haven't been able to see you regularly." She smiled. I understood how she felt and told her so by patting her head. She was just like a little kid sometimes.

"Come on, we have to get your luggage so we can get the heck out of here." I laughed. "I thought we'd go out for something to eat. It's about lunch and I'm hungry. How 'bout you?"

Instantly she got that cute innocent look on her face that she normally did when she felt she was being bothersome. "Well, you don't have to... I mean, you have to save what you can from your paycheck for gas, right?" She asked in that equally adorable voice.

"No problem." I laughed. "You worry too much. I have enough gas money to set me for the week and then some so it's okay. I saved my Christmas money for this." I should have left that part out because I could she looked even worse about it now.

"Tara, you didn't have to..."

"But I want to." I stopped her. "Just think of it as my Christmas present to you. We haven't seen each other in so long, let's just relax."

"Okay." She nodded and smiled as her cheeriness returned. That was the Bri I know and love.

"So has yer mom been good?" I asked as we walked to the luggage pick-up area.

"Yes." She nodded. "Despite her illnesses and all."

"Ah, yeah. I almost forgot about those." I sighed. "She's still the same quirky old mom though, right?"

"Of course!" She smiled brightly and adjusted the light carry-on backpack on her shoulder. "How has mom been? Is she good?"

I thought briefly about my mother as of late and suppressed the urge to sigh. "Of course." I lied. "Same as always, can't wait to see you. We both missed you while Steven... well you know how apathetic he is."

She nodded and all was silent for awhile. I knew we'd be talking up a storm soon as we were in the car. It's the only thing that would make those three hours pass by less painfully. When the buzzer for the cargo belt beeped, we jumped to action. Quickly I helped push her to the front so she could see all the baggage going by. She was short by nature and couldn't see behind the mass of giants. I barely could as well.

When we received the suitcase I picked it up and carried it with us to the large double doors that read "Dayton Airport". She must have not noticed that though for when we stepped outside she looked around and blinked. "Wow. Wellston is more populated then you let it out to be, Tara-chan."

I laughed and took my scarf off to wrap it around her neck. "This is Dayton. We're a good three hours from my house." I explained.

"Oh." She sighed. "Hey, snow!"

I looked up and sure enough she was right. Snow began falling onto the already snow patched ground. Did I make sure the barn was sealed up before I left? I didn't want to come home to a grumpy Starscream covered in snow... I grumbled and put a hand to my head, forcing thoughts of him out of my head. "Ah, great. Looks like I wont be taking the quick back roads home."

She just giggled and followed me as we headed to the car. Within minutes I opened the trunk to my purple Ford Escort and tossed her bag in there. She climbed into the passengers side while I quickly scurried into the driver's and started up my gay-mobile (as I liked to call it). I turned to check for traffic as I backed out and Ryuk smiled at me from where he hung in the back window. When Bri saw it, she squealed and grabbed him, his suction cup coming off the cold glass with a pop.

I just smiled and continued backing out. When we were out of the parking space and driving freely towards the exit, Bri smiled, impressed. "Wow, Tara-chan! You actually managed not to kill anyone!"

"Oh hush." I laughed. She was reminding me of the one time she was in the car as I drove and almost backed up into a car. I no longer remembered the incident but she recalled it for me every time with perfect detail.

"There are a lot of restaurants here to choose from." I said as we drove on the main road. "See anything?"

She searched a little, concentrating to the point where she was squinting and crinkling her nose cutely. "There!" She said after not too long. She pointed to none other then a Bob Evan's and I suppressed a groan. "I've never heard of that before! Is it good?"

"Yeah, it's good." I nodded. I wasn't lying, they were excellent. Me and Beth ate there many times after investigations. "They only have them here up north so I'm not surprised you've never heard of it."

"Let's go there then!" She smiled. Of course I couldn't deny her so soon we were driving into the parking lot. A light blanket of snow still covered the concrete but most had been tread away from the coming and going of cars.

Being the chivalrous person that I am, I opened her car door for her and lent my hand to help her out. "Quite the gentleman." She teased.

"You know me." I giggled. And she did. She was one of the few people that did actually know me for me. Like Sarah and Beth and...

"Starscream..." I sighed under my breath.

"Hmm? Did you say something?" She asked.

"No, no. Just muttering." I smiled. She took my hand and we walked blissfully into the restaurant.

Bob Evan's wasn't as crowded as it normally was and I could only speculate it's because of the snow. That was good though, it meant we could get a table faster. Sure enough as we walked in, we were ushered to a booth and seated. We sat opposite each other and ordered our drinks, sweet tea for both of us.

"So have you made friends here?" She asked, trying to strike up conversation.

"Yeah, Beth, remember? I told you about her before. Bryson and Whitney as well. They're pretty good friends." I sipped my tea. "You might be seeing Beth soon. We hang out a lot."

"That's cool! Yay! One of Tara-chan's friends!" She cheered.

I laughed a little. Thinking of Beth made me think of what I decided on telling her. Would she be shocked? Would she reject me? I don't think she'd ever thought I'd be hiding something like an alien robot in an old barn in the woods behind my house. I doubt that ever crossed Bri's mind as well. I looked over to my long time best friend who was scanning the menu and sighed. Should I tell her too? Maybe it would be best while she's here...

"Have you heard about that recent alien hype from L.A?" I asked, testing her.

She looked from the menu, perplexed by the sudden change in conversation. "Yeah, I've heard about it. What about it?"

"Do you believe any of it?" I asked bluntly while I lazily looked out the window.

"Believe it? Well... there was that one boy that got something on camera. It was all over YouTube but you never know with those elaborate hoaxes that are circulating now and days." That was understandable. "I'd like to believe they're true though."

I nodded and hummed, acting like I was taking a drink. "Would you wanna make contact with them?"

She blinked now, obviously catching onto something. Thankfully she answered anyway without question. "I think it would be cool to see one. For what I heard they're giants though... I don't want to get crushed."

I laughed at the thought of sweet Starscream trying to crush anyone. I know he's killed hundreds if not thousands before but how could I hold that against him? It was a war and people die in wars... "Well, if they wanted to kill us, I think they'd done so by now."

"Yeah, you're probably right." She giggled. "What with all the sudden alien questions? Have you made contact with one of them?" She joked but it made me jump a little.

"No, no." I smiled. "You know, just curious."

After that, our waiter came to take our orders. I hadn't scanned any part of the menu so I just got whatever Bri was having. It was good and soon I was paying the bill with my hard-earned cash. She asked if she could get a desert so I said "yes" and we split it. Over all it wasn't too pricey but I wouldn't be indulging in my anime fancies for awhile.

"Thank you for that." She said when we got back in the car.

"No problem. Glad you liked it." I started up the gay-mobile again and let it warm up before driving off. While we were in there, a fresh blanket of snow had covered the road, making me a bit nervous. Bri didn't notice. "It'll be fine." I told myself.

When there was an opening, I drove out onto the open road and began our long car journey home.

-/-/-/-

One of the perks of my crappy car is that I could set it up to play CDs or even an I-Pod. As Bri began to get drowsy, I started playing Bump of Chicken, a relief from all the Japanese pop she loved. That music was good but at the moment I needed something soft to help calm my nerves. I sang along as best I could and kept my eyes focused on the back roads. We were almost to my house.

For the past hour, all I could think of was Starscream. How would Bri react when I showed her the F-22 in the barn behind my home? Knowing her, it would either be extream excitement or extream fear. I hoped it wouldn't be the latter.

Within' thirty minutes we were home. I turned the car off, cutting Karma, one of my favorite songs, off halfway through. I leaned back in the seat and sighed. That's when something pink caught my eye. I looked over to my right and instantly my jaw dropped. No. She was here now?!

I gapped at the pink motor bike until Bri began to stir. She woke up sleepily and I tried to shake the expression from my face. "H-Hey, we're here." I said, shaking her a little.

"Okay." She smiled and, still holding Ryuk, got out of the car. I watched her exit, surprise still gnawing at my mind. There was a knock on my car door window and I jumped. Slowly I looked over to who it was and deadpanned. It was indeed Mikaela here with Arcee of all bots!

"Hey." She smiled when I opened my door. "Took you long enough! Your mom was starting to get worried."

I gaped at her for a moment but it quickly turned into a glare. "What are you doing here?" I demanded.

She blinked. "What do you mean?" God, I wanted to slap this girl.

"Arcee!" I exclaimed as quietly as I could. "She hates Star! What were you thinking?! They don't even know he's here!" My heart was beating a million a minute at the thought of the Autobots fighting Starscream. If he was captured then he would certainly be put on trial and then death.

"I know! We won't be here long though, and-"

"Tara-Chan?" Bri looked quizzically at the two of us and I sighed. "Who is this?"

I stopped. "Bri, this is Mikaela. She's a friend from school." I said after awhile.

"Nice to meet you." Mikaela extended a hand for Bri to shake and she took it. "I just came out because Tara has a bike that needs fixing." Nice cover...

"Oh, hey Bri, sorry." I quickly popped the trunk and left my car to carry the heavy luggage to the house. I set it within the house with a huff. "Mom will show you where my room is. I gotta go take care of this. Wont be long."

She nodded, obviously a still bit sleepy, and waved a little. Mikaela started up the pink motorcycle and I reluctantly jumped on the back. "Hi, Arcee." I grumbled. The machine responded with a rev and soon we were taking off through the snow. There was another clearing behind my house. It was smaller then the one Starscream stayed in and more easily accessible. When we reached it, the motorcycle stopped and we quickly jumped off.

Within moments, the femme Autobot was transforming into her sleek robotic shape. She was a short mech, about Bumblebee's height, so she was easily hidden by the trees as she sat down. "Hey, Tara. What's up?"

"Nuthin' much." I said with a grin as we pumped fists, a gesture I taught her not too long ago. "What's up with you? Why are you here?" I hoped she couldn't sense my nervousness.

"Optimus found Decepticon signals around this area. He wanted me to give you a heads-up and tell you to contact me if you see anything." Arcee reached from her storage compartment and handed me a comm link. "You can message me directly with that."

At this point I'm surprised I'm still standing. I was praying with ever fiber of my being that Starscream would remain in his Alt-Mode where Arcee wouldn't be able to detect him. I told him to stay in Alt-Mode unless he contacts me first and I said it was okay. Suddenly I was deathly aware of the comm link he'd given me in my pocket. I was praying it wouldn't go off.

"Around here? That's odd." I tried to play dumb. It wasn't hard considering I'm a really good liar (or so I've been told). That's not something I'd brag about though...

"Yeah. They must know we have allies around here." Arcee blinked at me and I smiled. "Just be careful, okay? Me and some of the other bots will be in the Ohio area from now on. I told Optimus not to keep scanning this place back at headquarters. I trust you can take care of that."

"Of course." I nodded. "I'll keep scanning and let you know when I find something."

"I knew you would." She smiled. "Optimus worries about you for nothing!"

That, dear readers, made my blood run cold. "What do you mean... worries?" I asked, nervousness creeping into my voice. "Has he been monitoring me? Does he still... have doubts about me?"

I could feel Mikaela's eyes boring into me but I couldn't look at her. My eyes were locked on the blinding pink of Arcee's face and baby blue of her optics. That moment, as a waited for my answer, was probably one of the longest in my life. It was then make it or break it time. I felt almost like I was being judged by God in my final hours.

"Well..." Arcee paused and I think my heart stopped. "You did associate with the Decepticons before you met us Autobots. Optimus is just being more safe then sorry, you know? It's nothing against you personally, Tara. I mean, heck! He adores you, remember?"

I nodded and swallowed in nervousness. "Yeah." I'm surprised I didn't stutter. "Well, I'll get back to you if I find anything."

Arcee then nodded and transformed back into her motorcycle form. Mikaela touched my arm in reassurance before mounting the bike and I followed. Would she tell Optimus about Starscream now? Or worse yet, would she tell them I know something? Hell, they could torture me to death for all I care. I'd never tell them about Starscream...

I instantly felt guilty. As wind wiped across my face, I felt tears form and knew why. This was such a horrible situation I'd placed myself in. I didn't want to lie to Optimus and the other Autobots. At the same time, I couldn't bear to turn Starscream in. God only knows what they'd do to him. I couldn't stand the thought of my sweet Starscream being tortured or worse.

-/-/-/-

It was probably the fifteenth time I'd checked my wrist watch but I didn't care. It may not seem like it at times, but I'm very punctual. It's hard for me to arrive to something late or wait on someone and have them be late. I never kept a schedule or was very organized. I just liked to know the time and make sure everything was "going to plan".

Beth was now thirty minutes late.

"Is it possible she got lost?" Bri asked, looking at my nervous face.

I bit my lip and began to tap my foot. "No, she knows these streets like the back of her hand. She can't be lost and besides, she Google Mapped the location before hand." Well, actually I Googled it and sent it to her. I didn't think she'd need it but better safe then sorry.

"Where could she be then?" Bri huffed. I wanted to snap at her but I didn't. This wasn't her fault and I needed to keep my anger in check.

It had been a couple of days since Bri arrived so I called and asked Beth if she'd like to go catch a movie and then drive back to my house for lunch. She was actually aloud to drive by herself for once so I had my mom drop us off at the movie theater. Beth would be driving us back on the return trip home or so was the plan.

I crossed my arms in the frigged cold and made sure Bri was warm before going back to my worry pose; Lip bit, arms crossed, shoulders tensed and foot tapping. I was worried about Beth, yes, but more so about what I was going to tell her. I'd made up my mind to tell Beth and Bri together about Starscream today. I swear I almost died of relief when her sleek red car pulled up to us.

"Hey Tara." She sighed a little and looked genuinely bummed. "I'm so sorry. You know how my mom is. I tried to get out but I had to be bitched at upon leaving. Then Jamie hid my license..."

"Don't worry about it." I smiled. "I got here early for a reason, dork. Just park the car."

She scoffed and drove off to park at the only available spacing at the far end of the parking lot. Within minutes she was leaving her car and walking our way. I didn't understand how she could walk so casually in this freezing weather. I'll probably never get use to the harsh weather in Ohio. I know I still haven't to this day.

"Ready for 3-D horror awesomeness?" Beth asked when she reached us.

I rolled my eyes. "You've seen this movie, what? Five times already?" I scoffed.

"No! Three!" So feigned pain and a pout. I couldn't help but laugh as I always did. Everything Beth did always seemed to make me laugh.

"Yeah, Yeah. Well, Beth, this is Bri." I motioned to Bri who was standing a little behind me. She had shrunk into her shy, nervous personality that only came out when she met significant people. For her, Beth was a significant person considering she was the best friend I had here. "Bri, this is Beth. She's my bud." I grinned.

"Nice to meet you." Bri said shyly and smiled.

Beth smiled too. "Nice to meet you too, dude." She looked at me with a look all her own and motioned to the door. "Are we gonna stand around or what?"

"Hell no! I'm freezing my booty off out here!" I wrapped my arms around myself and faked a shiver. Beth laughed again and rushed us inside where we bought our tickets and popcorn. I was smart enough to bring my own sugary snacks. After all, that candy at the movies was just too expensive.

We were going to see some odd new 3-D horror film. I honestly don't care much for horror. Sorry, but I actually have morals. I don't know how anyone can sit for two hours and watch people be killed and tortured or worse. Beth told me this one wasn't as bad as the others so I obliged to go. After all, she was becoming obsessed and I wanted to see what all the hub-bub was about.

During the movie I was paying attention but not completely. I still had Starscream on my mind and how I was going to explane everything to Beth and Bri. I was aware enough to jump when I should have jumped and gasp when I should have gasped. I have to say, the 3-D wasn't too bad. I'm just glad we didn't sit in the front like Beth wanted. I don't know if my innocent (well, maybe not so much) mind could handle it. All the while, though, Starscream preoccupied the dark recesses of my mind.

When we emerged, stunned and shaken (me and Bri more so then Beth), I folded my 3-D glasses and stuffed them in my jeans. I liked to keep mementos no matter how dorky they were.

"So?" Beth asked, nudging my arm with her elbow. "How was it."

"Meh." I stuffed my hands in my pockets and shrugged. "Okay. You were right though. That sheriff was hot." Both Beth and Bri laughed and smiled. It was nice to spend time with friends. Bri wouldn't be here much longer and you never knew what tomorrow entailed.

A/n: Part two will be up soon. Please review!!