I wake with a start. My clock reads 1:12AM. Great, I think to myself,
this is just what I need before my big Science test tomorrow.
Frustrated, I kick my blanket off. I was hotter then hell, and
sweating. I slowly sit up. The room spins around and I'm back down, too
exhausted to move and too tense to be anywhere near comfortable. My
head feels like it is going to explode and my clammy hands go numb. I
lie there for a good 10 minutes. Come on, I think to myself, get up!
Nothing. OK, well, can you lift your arm in the air? Nothing. Fingers?
Can you move those? No, can't feel those. Toes? Just wiggle your toes.
Nothing. Come on, you lazy toes! Move! The toes on my right foot bend
down. Yes, victory!! I keep moving my toes so I don't loose momentum.
Then I manage to bend an elbow. Before I know it, I'm sitting up again.
I sway a little, but my arms support me on either side. My eyes slowly
close and I take a deep breath. I stand up and grab my pillow. Quietly,
clinging to the railing, I go downstairs. I take a sharp left and open
my empty basement closet. My basement is cool and comfortable, and best
of all away from the rest of my family so I won't wake them. I collapse
onto the floor in a heap, closing the door behind me as a willingly
fall. And there I am, huddled in my basement closet, not quite
shivering more, twitching, from my tense muscles. I make weird sounds
when I'm sick too, a kind of quiet moaning. And this is the state I
know I will be in until I drift to sleep. It could be awhile. Sometimes
when I get sick, I feel like I am totally alone in the world. Nobody
knows this happens, because I won't tell them. I don't think they would
understand. They would probably take me to a hospital or something, and
I don't like doctors. So, I keep things to myself. And so far, that's
been working. Sort of.