Title: Not Myself
Author: BAS1630 (a.k.a Rachel)
Pairing: None as yet. Main character is going to be Spike.
Rating: Hmmmm.... I always suck at guessing this... My guess would be
anything from PG-13 to R. I doubt very much that it'll be NC-17, since
there's no graphic sex going to be depicted (sowwy).
Category: Humor, Hopefully Action later on... maybe even Romance....?? ;-)
Word Count: 920
Completed: No, WIP.
Feedback: Yes, please!!!! However, please RR but be somewhat gentle. As I read somewhere once, flames will be used to toast my stash of smores. :)
Warnings: Um, spoilers for early Season 5 Angel, I guess.
that's my excuse! :)
Not Myself
By Rachel"Angel, we have a situation."
Angel lifted his head from his papers as Wesley and the others walked into his office.
"Color me stunned." A touched relieved, Angel pushed back the files and forms he had been staring at for the past few hours. "What's up?"
Wesley continued as Lorne, Spike, Gunn, and Fred all became situated on various perches in Angel's office,
"It seems that a Fox-Maiden has taken up residence in a Santa Clarita retreat, and is wreaking some considerable havoc."
"A Fox-Maiden, huh?" Angel perked up with considerable interest as he leaned forward in his seat. "A shapeshifting seductress."
Fred tilted her head. "You know of them?"
"Only by reputation. Pretty gruesome killing methods." He looked back at Wesley.
"I thought they were indigenous to Japan?"
"They are. Though obviously some stumble upon foreign soil from time to time. It might have been awhile before we even heard about this one if it weren't for this arriving today..." He plopped a large manila envelope on Angel's desk, which Angel opened.
He slid out two paper items; one a crisp white page with a Wolfram and Hart letterhead, and the other a withered and worn scrap of a paper-like material that smelled and felt of age.
Glancing at the etchings scratched on the older product, Angel lifted his eyebrows and studied the others. "This is in Dutch?"
"Presumably." Wesley indicated for him to read the newer sheet of paper with the firm letterhead, and Angel suddenly realized that page exhibited English handwriting in an elegant cursive.
Angel-
Greetings. Since we are men of some importance and our time is precious, I'll make this brief...
As you may or may not be aware, there is a Fox-Maiden terrorizing the inhabitants of the Santa Clarita "Couples Retreat" of Red Heart, which is located not far from your Los Angeles. I would not be surprised if this has yet to reach your ears, for the employees are going to considerable lengths to keep business lucrative as always. It is due to a timely coincidence that an employee in my charge managed to find out about this situation at all.
I am bringing this to your attention however, to prove that those in our firm are not all corrupted by corporate greed... and that despite reputation, some of us are in fact men of honor.
And that in the hopes that one day you will find yourself in a position to repay the favor, as it were.
Enclosed you will find the means to make defeating this foe a little more straightforward.
Best of Everything,
Cornelis Visser
Wolfram and Hart C.E.O, Netherlands
Angel finished reading and looked skeptically at the others. "Is this guy for real?"
Gunn shrugged with one shoulder. "Seems like it, man."
Lorne spoke up for the first time as well, "Yeah Angelcakes, don't sell the guy short just because he's a Toady for Evil. Even Javert came to his senses in the end."
Angel gave Lorne a look. "Javert killed himself."
Lorne brightened considerably. "Why sweetie, I didn't know you knew the theatre. I'm touched."
Ignoring him, Angel turned his attention back to the papers in his hand as he stood and rounded his desk to stand with the others.
"But how do we know that we can even trust this guy?"
"You don't. Not really.... But he included an incredible rock that I'm planning on hocking as soon as I leave this room."
Angel looked back up to see Spike admiring his right hand, which was now sporting a gold ring with a large blood-red stone that looked suspiciously like a ruby.
Angel frowned in confusion. "Why?"
"Who cares?" Spike intoned with feeling as he waggled his fingers to make the gem sparkle.
Angel placed the letter from Visser back on his desk as he held the delicate older scrap up to the light.
"Do you know Dutch?" He heard Fred ask.
"I know how to read it, but I've gotten rusty as to the translations." He lowered the scrap and studied it closely, a pensive furrow on his brow.
"Hij die dit juweel tegen het meisje draagt moet vechten, slechts wanneer de taak wordt gedaan zullen de dingen net geplaatst worden."
He waited a beat out of curiosity....
Waited more.....
Nothing happened.
"Well, that was pointless." A strange female voice breathed.
Confused (I didn't hear the door open...), Angel looked up to regard the figure and dropped the scrap with a violent jolt.
Where Spike had been standing amongst the other five, a strange woman now stood.
The others stared at her with huge eyes.
She stared back with even larger eyes.
The eyes widened even further as a hand flew to her throat. Upon resting there for a brief second, the hand eventually slid down to cup her apparent right breast as her other hand rose to grab her left.
Holding herself in such a manner, the woman slowly lowered her gaze inch-by-inch until she was staring at the female endowments she still clutched.
"Oh, bollocks." She said with passion.
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Yes, she/he's who you think it is! Much wackiness ensues!! ;-) I have a strong idea as to where I want to take this, but first I need feedback to find out if people are even interested in reading more. So please RR, it gives me inspiration! :-D(And to answer the question probably in some readers' minds: I don't know if this'll turn Slash. Probably depends on the type of feedback I get!
I'm a feedback whore, first of my kind. This is not news to me.)