It has been brought to my attention none of the scene breaks I had put in stayed in the document when I posted said documents on here. I apolgize for not having double checked. A very big THANK YOU to reviewer Karl who pointed this out to me. I can see how this would create confusion and it upsets me as I have tried very hard to make the story flow and be easy to follow without a lot of backtracking needed so all things are timely.

I now fix this and hope more people will continue on and give the story a chance. Again...my sincerest apologies. - Moon

The following story is the combined effort of our Eastenders gaming group. We do not own Eastenders or Ashes to Ashes (although two of the current characters are OCs). We do hope you enjoy. Please read and review-thanks

Chapter 1

Jack sat, his hands on his chin, waiting for someone who may never show. He let out a long sigh, and checked his watch.

Alyssa stepped out of the black cab, dragging her purple suitcase behind her. She fished in her purse for the fare and smiled at the driver as she paid him. She stood on the pavement and breathed in slowly. She surveyed the busyness around her, and smiled at the hustle and bustle of the place. Her new home. All she needed now was a place to live.

Jack's eyes lifted to a sight of a woman dragging a suitcase. She was young. She was impressionable. She shouldn't be here, in this dump. Sighing, he took out his phone, and began to make a call.

Alyssa headed through the miniature park in the centre of the square wheeling her suitcase behind her. She walked calmly past a man on a bench, her heels making a familiar crunching noise on the gravel underneath her feet; she walked in the direction of the nearest shop.

Alyssa wheeled her suitcase up to the shop and stood outside. Surveying the market around her she watched people going about their business. She turned to face the shop glancing at the window to check for any notices. She saw none and then headed inside to ask some questions.

The shop was not busy so she waited at the counter for somebody to come and attend to her. She resisted the urge to tap her fingers on the counter as she did not want to appear to be rude and make a bad impression.

A lock of her copper hair fell across her face as she stood waiting.

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Rowan walked out of the station. She idly scraped her hair back as she surveyed the Square wondering once again if she'd find some book material here. "At the rate things are going, maybe I should write a guidebook" she thought to herself.

With a mental shrug, she shifted her duffel across her shoulder and picked up her carry-all bag and set off in search of a place to stay...

Rowan spotted the large red building that was the Queen Victoria and headed over, lemonade would go down very well just about now.

She walked inside and allowed a moment for her eyes to adjust and then ordered lemonade. She took her drink and walked to a quiet looking table in the corner and after dropping her bags on the seat next to her, rummaged in her bag until she found her journal. Before she bent to her writing she let her eyes wander over the place. Hopefully, she would find someone who wasn't too busy to ask them where the nearest B&B was. She settled over her journal and began to write...

Today I have arrived in Walford. I don't know what to make of this place yet but seems like any other place you might see. Been awhile since I was back in a city ha ha. There's a nice park in the Square and I'm in a decent little pub called the Queen Victoria. I will have to see if I can find a B&B or room to rent or something. I have enough money to tide me over for awhile until I can find a job. I imagine I can find somewhere to cook and see if I can't get started on my book. Maybe I could just be like Boswell and get my journals published…except I don't know anyone of note nor am I likely to. Sigh. I saw a man in the Square when I was walking to this pub…the way he moved I think he's a cop. I also saw a young lady who looks as if she has also just arrived. She had the most amazing titian hair! I know my hair is looking decidedly piebald and I'm going to have to find a hairdresser soon to redo my stripes….

Rowan fingered her shoulder length curls and eyed the streaks that she knew were starting to grow out. She sighed to herself and decided to have one more lemonade and then maybe pluck up the courage to ask someone about a place to stay.

Alyssa walked into the pub, apparently nobody in the little shop was in the mood to serve her, she dumped her body onto a bar stool and rested her suitcase against the side of the bar. She glanced around briefly and smiled briefly at a girl sitting at a table on the other side of the pub.

Alyssa turned to the barmaid began to order a drink, she looked at the clock, 12:30. She smiled to herself and ordered a Malibu and lemonade. She sipped her drink slowly and sighed as the alcohol flowed into her system. She needed somewhere to stay, preferably a flat or maisonette to rent. She scanned the pub for other people; apparently the girl was the only other customer here.

Jack walked through the pub, ordering a whiskey from the bar, large. He needed a breather, just five minutes...

Rowan glanced up from her journal when she heard the pub door open. It was that girl with the amazing hair she'd seen outside earlier. She nodded back when the girl smiled at her and bent back to her journal. How old was that girl anyway? Maybe 18? Surely no more than 20? Rowan sighed.

She remembered when she was 20. It seemed forever ago now after all that had happened. She'd met Brian when she was 20 and at college. He'd been an art major, and British and very cute and very charming. They'd fallen in love and gotten married…she had felt she was living in a fairy tale. Then he had wanted to move back to England. She had readily agreed and they'd been blissfully happy. She had even started to make friends, well, one friend, she amended. Karen. A brassy bottle blonde with an attitude, they had bonded over cigarettes when she and Brian and some of his mates had been on what he termed a "pub crawl". Feeling overwhelmed by the testosterone, Rowan had escaped to sit at the bar. Karen had been sitting at the bar at the time, smoking happily away. Rowan had been trying to quit at the time but was finding it hard going. She broke down and begged one and somehow their friendship was born.

Karen had become like a sister to Rowan, who sorely missed having family around. They wore the same size in clothes and shoes and happily raided each others closets. They'd shared the same size in boyfriends as well, Rowan thought bitterly. She'd retreated into herself after Brian had left with Karen but she shook herself out of it a bit when the final papers were done with and he gave Rowan her share of the money for the little house they had bought. She bought a large duffel bag in a charity shop, stuffed it with some essentials and hit the road. She also started keeping a journal. Now she felt an old woman at just 34.

She heard the door again and glanced over from the corner of her eye. It was that man she'd seen before outside as well. The one she was sure was a cop, or ex-cop. She pulled her leg closer and propped her chin on her knee. She'd need to get something to eat soon she thought when she realized the time. She'd skipped breakfast. She lifted her head, propped her journal onto her knee and started writing again. She'd get a few more observations written down and then maybe she'd see about a late lunch…and a place to stay.

Alyssa watched the other woman in the pub closely. She seemed to be new as well. She had a bag next to her that looked pretty full. She took another sip of her drink and then a huge gulp, more alcohol in her system, Alyssa exhaled, satisfied.

She saw the woman's head turn again as the door clicked shut. She turned to look as well. The man from the bench had sat down at the other end of the bar and ordered a drink, it looked like whiskey or brandy from where Alyssa was sitting, she made eye contact and smiled at him before taking another sip of her drink.

She swung her legs and grabbed a newspaper from the rack that was on the end of the bar, 'Walford Gazette' she read the name, interested in all the local gossip and news.

Rowan finished up a last sentence in her journal and decided it was high time she has something to eat; it had to be almost 1:00.

She clicked her pen closed and slid it into the pocket in the binding of the journal and then put it back in her carry-all and zipped the bag shut. She stood up and grabbed her duffel from the floor and carefully slung it over her shoulder. She downed the swallow of her lemonade and headed for the door.

There had to be a café or something nearby where she could get a quick sandwich.

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Jack noticed someone staring at him. The girl was young, attractive, and staring over at him. With a bit of Dutch courage, he walked over to a woman reading The Walford Gazette.

"You alright? You're new, aren't you?"

Alyssa looked up as the man from the park spoke to her. She stared at his face momentarily comprehending his question.

"What gave it away? The bag?" she joked gesturing to the large purple suitcase blocking the way past her.

She smiled widely at him and absentmindedly rolled the corner of the newspaper with her forefinger and thumb. A lock of her titian hair fell in front of her eyes blocking her view and she brushed it away with her other hand.

"The first thing everyone who comes here does is head to the bar." Jack took a swig of his own drink. "Call it a custom. You got family here?"

Alyssa shook her head making her curls swing, and the lock of hair dislodged itself again, momentarily hiding her emerald green eyes, until, once more she brushed it out of her face and looped it behind her ear.

"You could say I'm hunting for a new life."

She smiled, suddenly distant, remembering her life before. She blinked, coming out of her trance and smiled at him.

"What about you? How long have you been here?"

Jack sighed. "Too long," was his only answer. Without a word, he brushed off out of the Vic, leaving Alyssa alone.

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Rowan walked into the brightly colored cafe. She immediately liked its bright cheeriness. She walked up to the woman behind the counter and ordered a cheese sandwich and a cup of tea. Then she put on the warmest, friendliest smile she could muster and said

"My name's Rowan. I'm a pretty decent chef and have worked in restaurants and cafes all over the UK for the past several years. I don't suppose you have any jobs going?"

She kept smiling and widened her eyes...trying to look just the teeniest bit pathetic.

Jane gave an exasperated sigh. "You know what? Your hired!" she flicked her hair from her eyes, tore off her apron and threw it to Rowan. "I need a breather from this place-and if Ian says otherwise-hit him!"

Rowan blinked in astonishment as the woman behind the counter stormed out of the cafe. She stared at the door a moment, open-mouthed...and then shrugged, placed her tea and sandwich back on the counter, picked up her bags and stuck them in the back. She tied on the apron, picked up the sandwich and ate it almost absently as she studied the menu and the premises.

She had to admit, it was the most original way she had ever been hired. But who was this Ian person? The woman's husband most likely, to judge by the woman's outburst.

Jane stormed across the square and sighed. She stood her phone out. She had made a stupid mistake, hiring a girl she didn't even know... Sighing, she began to text, her fingers tapping the phone buttons furiously.

She finished her sandwich and then busied herself with the normal "look like I'm working" activity...wiping counters. She idly wondered how late she would have to stay here and would she be done early enough to find somewhere to sleep...before she fell asleep.

Jack looked nervously as Jane stormed away.

"Erm, bacon buttie cheers love!"

Rowan jumped, startled by the voice behind her. It was the man from the pub...strange...she could have sworn he was chatting up that pretty girl when she'd been in the pub earlier.

She quickly recovered and flashed a quick, if nervous grin.

"Coming right up"

She was relieved as her familiarity with kitchens took over and she swiftly made the sandwich and slid the plate onto the counter in front of the man and asked "Tea?" as she held out her hand for the money.

"Coffee actually, love. Blimey, you know your stuff don't you!" He handed her 10 quid, "Keep the change!"

She blushed and allowed herself a chuckle. She poured him a cup of coffee and handed it over.

"Thanks...it's my first ten minutes. I've done restaurant work for years" she stopped herself when she realized she was starting to babble. She snapped her mouth shut.

Jack laughed, oh god, he felt himself going red. This NEVER happened to him...ever. He cleared his throat.

"Restaurants eh? Where are you from? Why did you want to come to this dump?

"What you mean my accent's not a giveaway?" she laughed. "I moved here from America with my husband, he was English. But, after we split up I just started traveling around, been traveling for the past 10 years all over the UK. Restaurant work is easy, generally easy to find and I like to cook."

Rowan shrugged and started idly wiping the counter again. At least she was getting control of the babbling...damn...strangers always made her babble! She cursed her shyness and tried to act normal.

Why did he seem nervous though, she wondered. She wasn't the sort of person that made people nervous. Of course, she was acting like some sort of lunatic, anyone might find that scary. She realized she'd been silent too long.

"I came here cause I was just passing through. It's someplace I haven't been yet. I seem to have acquired a job under strange hiring circumstances," she laughed again. "Now I just have to find out how late I'll be here working and a place to stay."

She gestured at her bags shoved back in a corner near some shelves.

Pat walked into the café. There was a girl behind the counter she'd never seen before. She walked up next to Jack who was talking to her.

"Alright Jack?" she asked him and then looked at the girl, "give us a cup of tea would you love?"

"Sure," the girl replied brightly. Pat's eyebrows raised slightly in surprise. She was American.

The girl handed her the tea and Pat passed her the money.

"So, um, who are you?" she asked the girl casually.

"I'm Rowan, just started here apparently. I came in here about 20 minutes ago and asked about a job. The lady behind the counter threw the apron at me and told me I was hired. She said I should hit Ian if he says otherwise," the girl, Rowan, explained, the expression on her face one of still surprised at the way she'd been hired and amusement.

Pat couldn't help a brief bark of laughter then asked, "You're American aren't you?"

"Yes, originally. Been in the UK now 10 years though," the girl gave a shrug and pushed some hair off her face. She was a pretty little thing but looked tired.

"Well, thanks for the tea, darlin'. Bianca should be here in a couple of hours and you'll be able to sit down and have a rest," Pat smiled.

"Right, thank you. I wondered how late I would have to be here," Rowan laughed.

The door of the cafe swung open, and Syed Masood rushed in. He looked anxious.

"Jane I -" but it wasn't Jane behind the counter. There was a new face. A pretty young woman; petite, and bustling behind the counter in a very business-like fashion.

"Where's Jane?" Syed showed no sign of calming down.

Rowan looked away from Pat and Jack a young man came rushing in asking about Jane.

He was very cute with that dark hair flopping into his big brown eyes.

"I'm not sure where she went…she…left in a rush. She seemed a bit upset at someone named Ian," she replied. "Sorry can't be of more help."

"I thought I saw her walking into the Vic," Pat supplied, "but I couldn't say for sure it was her."

"Can you blame her for walking out?" came a voice from one of the corner tables.

Christian put down the newspaper that he had been reading and winked flirtatiously at Rowan. "Another coffee when you're ready, sweetheart."

He looked directly at Syed who turned around, wishing the ground would swallow him up before adding: "And whatever my friend is having - ".

"I've been looking everywhere for you!" Syed spat out, passionately.

"I thought Jane had seen you, but here you are, as if butter wouldn't melt!" he started to leave...

Christian chuckled as he watched the slightly built man squirm. Standing up, he folded his newspaper and left it on the table.

"Cancel that coffee, love", he told Rowan who was the middle of pouring him a cup. She didn't look too happy.

Brushing past Syed, who was on the verge of leaving, he grasped his former lover's arm tightly:

"And, you know exactly where I like to put my butter, don't you Syed?"

Syed's face gave a look of disgust, with a hint of lust, and managed to shake free of Christian's grip.

"All I wanted was to tell you that mum's on the warpath. We got some orders mixed up, and the bacon butties and sausage rolls got sent to the Muslim Mother's meeting somehow. Since you're too busy having fun, I'll have to sort it out."

Syed left the cafe, as briskly as he entered.

"So, nothing too traumatic then?" Christian laughed, his eyes fixed on Syed's arse moved as he walked away out of the cafe.

Sighing, he looked at a bewildered Rowan. "I s'pose I'd better go and help him. Poor little thing. He can't do anything when he's in that state. Needs a good man behind him, that one!"

With that, he chuckled at his own innuendo and followed Syed out of the cafe.

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Syed marched out of the cafe, and weaved through the busy market place. He was heading for the bench. He sat down, and reached into his jacket pocket. He pulled out his mobile phone and proceeded to look through his texts.

He was reading through all the old ones. Many of them being Christian's. His were the only ones he didn't delete; he didn't have the heart to.

"Sy, I need u with me" read one text.

"I enjoyed last nite! More 2nite?" read another.

Just then, a shadow loomed over him, which tore him from his reverie.

"'Allo gorgeous! Hoping to hear someone?"

Syed looked up at the handsome face of Christian, who stood beaming at him like the Cheshire Cat; if the Cheshire Cat had finely honed muscles and wore impossibly tight tee-shirts.

"I - I - "

"I thought you said there was a crisis with the catering for the Muslim Mothers meeting?"

Syed swallowed. "Amira said she'd text me about -",his mouth went dry as he struggled to think something up. Christian sat next to him, his thigh brushing lightly but deliberately against Syed's.

"About what?"

Switching his phone off, Syed slipped it into his jacket pocket, blushing.

"Don't worry -" Christian softly reassured him. "I've not deleted any of your texts either."

"What are - I keep all my texts. You're nothing special!" Syed tried to edge away from Christian's person. His eyes couldn't help but drift to those big strong arms of his though. The arms which had held him tight during a few wild but very beautiful nights.

He had to get away, but Christian's gravitational pull was too strong for Syed, who could only orbit him like a planet's moon.

Syed leapt off the bench, like a cat on a hot plate.

"I have to go. The business is in trouble - remember?" Syed's eyes were almost pleading with Christian's to let go of their hypnotic gaze...

Christian held onto him, looking down into those huge pleading eyes. Syed had never looked more fragile.

"I don't believe you", he replied, his voice husky with growing desire.

"About the texts, I mean, and the business - hmm! - I'm sure your mum can handle the mix-up over a few misplaced sausage rolls herself. She's made of stern stuff. I've seen her deal with far worse. Walking in on Ian Beale in his hot tub for a start! What a sight that must have been!"

Syed tried to suppress a giggle and avert his eyes from Christian's heated gaze.

He must try to fight his feelings. It was so very wrong, but yet so very right. All he could think about was how tender and gentle Christian had been that very first time.

"I've got to go". He repeated; his tone more firm this time.

Christian gave a small wry smile, "Then let me come with you, Sy. We can face the wrath of your mum together!"

For a brief moment, it looked like Syed would comply with Christian's idea. Then his eyebrows furrowed:

"I don't need anyone to hold my hand. Do you enjoy treating me like a helpless little puppy? I used to have my own business - I was building something good. Why don't you go and bug Roxy to go shopping with you, or whatever it is you do?"

With that, Syed found the strength he needed to free himself from Christian's hold, and he disappeared out into the bustling street.

Christian sat lost in thought for a minute or two watching Syed disappear into the busy throng.

The boy was hot-headed that's for sure. It was one of the traits that Christian found himself attracted to. On the other hand, he missed the silliness that they shared together like when they fought over the jar of chutney that they were both trying to open.

He smiled remembering the look of horror on Sy's face when the gunk that ended up over his pristine white tee-shirt.

Taking his mobile out of pocket, he found the text that he had been looking for:

If u do this thing. This thing I no u can do. I'll spend the night with u. xxx

He was interrupted by Masood's cheery greeting as the postman past the bench:

"Oh hi, Christian. What are you doing here?"

Christian smiled. "Well you know what they say: where there's greenery, there's queenery!"

Shaking his head, Mas continued walking to complete his round, leaving Christian to contemplate his situation further.

In the past, he had no problems with one-night stands but whilst he had Sy - correction - with the one person he had truly loved, living and working within spitting distance.

Grateful that Roxy had given him a job working at the Vic, it didn't stop him thinking that right now, right at this minute, he could have been working side by side with -

He regretted his outburst at the Masala Masood when Zainab had taunted him with details of Syed and Amira's honeymoon; he had known that the boy was as still as green as grass as far as women were concerned. Gay or straight, Christian could read him like a book. With an experienced eye, he observed the couple's body language. that the marriage hadn't yet been consummated.

Then to cap it all, the unsuspecting Mas had asked him to help build the bed for the happy couple. That did it for Christian who promptly went out on the lash - oh god! Worst mistake ever! It did however succeed in making Sy jealous when Christian introduced Leyton - the bloke he had bought home -, as his "new" boyfriend.

He knew that Sy had to be honest to Amira. The girl deserved that, at least. She was lovely, sweet kid - a bit naive - but Christian liked her and wanted her to be happy. Like he wanted Sy to be happy. Only Sy wasn't.

Later that day, when Syed explained that both he and Amira were planning a baby, now that both he and Christian had moved on. After all, Christian had a new boyfriend.

I only said that to make you jealous Christian blurted out to a stunned Syed. The atmosphere between them was tense, awkward and yet the there was an unspoken heated passion that passed between them.

Perhaps there was a chance, after all! The things you do for love, mused Christian putting away his mobile. Looking up he could see Roxy waving frantically from the Vic. Looking at his watch, he saw it was time for his shift.

Plastering on that smile which betrayed nothing to anyone but to one man he truly loved, Christian stuck his hands into his jeans pockets and ambled across the square:

It's show time!

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Syed stepped into the office of the unit which served as the premises for Masala Masood - the catering company which married the Masoods with the Beales, in a strictly business sense.

Nobody was around, so it was quite dark. He switched the lights on, and went over to the desk. What was that? He noticed the notepad; it had a doodle of a huge heart. Inside were the words 'Amira 4 Syed' in her handwriting.

Syed took a deep breath. In his heart, he knew he loved her - he loved her company, he loved her beauty, her smile, the way she liked to push his hair away whenever it flopped into his eyes. She was so right for him, he thought.

Then he remembered the way it felt to have Christian so close to him on the bench a few minutes ago, and his heart leapt. His heart never performed a somersault when he thought about Amira. Thinking of her made him feel warm and fuzzy. With Christian on the brain, he felt hot and excited; passionate and alive.

No - this was wrong. These things in his mind; he had to fight them. He had to stay on the wholesome path. He had already lost his family once before, and couldn't risk losing them again. He took out his mobile, and pressed a few buttons.

"Hi gorgeous! What are you up to? Oh yeah? I'm at the unit...no, mum's not here...no, no, you finish the shopping, I'll handle things here...I-I love you too. Bye." Amira had sounded so sweet on the phone; happy, in an almost childlike way. Marriage seemed to suit her. Why could he not feel such joy?

Syed put the phone back in his pocket and picked up the office telephone's handset. He had a lot of work to do to sort out the mess from earlier. Maybe, he thought, if he fixed everything, his mother would lay off him a bit.

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Rowan had clenched her jaw to keep her mouth from gaping open at the scene between the two men. The writer in the back of her mind went to work filing away their expressions and what they were saying as she quickly put down the coffee pot to keep from scalding her hand.

She looked helplessly to Pat who had somehow slipped out and didn't want to turn to see if Jack was still there.

She bit her lip, certain her anxiety was all over her face as she watched the confrontation unfold and breathed a quiet sigh of relief as they left but unable to help her giggle at the joke the one called Christian had made as he left.

Rowan's mind spun, turning over the recent drama. She couldn't help an inward smile...this place just might be the gold mine she was looking for! Her fingers itched to write it in her journal while the details were still fresh.

She finally turned to see if Jack was still there, realizing that her previous anxiety at a new place had melted away.

Jack blinked slowly, and then turned back to the counter. He slid a five pound note on the counter. "Keep the change!" he smiled. Then, he turned away and left without a word.