Disclaimer: blah blah blah
A/N: 29/3/09 - This is a rewrite of the original Bruises story actually. I didn't really like how I wrote the original and decided to tweak it up a little because I'm anal that way.
Pairings: AkuRoku, slight Cleon and RikuSora
Bruises
[b]
It was the fourth - no, fifth time this week. There wasn't a limb on Roxas that wasn't aching. Roxas wondered when Axel would realise this and stop hitting him. Somehow, he had been able to block out the pain. He had entered a state in which he hardly felt the kicks to his stomach and torso. It didn't hurt now but it definitely would in the morning.
Roxas was finally allowed to sink to the ground when Axel relinquished his hold on him. He fell against the wall of the alley in a crumpled heap and didn't even bother to check if he had broken anything. Bad news like that should wait until he could get Sora to look him over, complete with baby blue-eyed glare and a worried pout.
Wait, pay attention. Axel was talking to him. "Are you listening?" hissed the redhead angrily and Roxas barely stopped himself from stupidly answering 'No'. The redhead grabbed his hair and pulled his head back. "Is this enough to make you stay away from me?"
The question was almost polite; sexual if you considered Axel's guttural voice.
Roxas looked at Axel with his one good eye (the other was swollen shut) but didn't answer. Still, Axel understood what he was saying. This wasn't nearly enough to keep him away. Letting out a cry of frustration, Axel punched him across the face.
It was funny how Axel despised these punchbag sessions and how Roxas always seemed to look forward to it. The reversal of roles wasn't funny no matter how you saw it. The last thing Roxas saw before blacking out was the world turning sideways as he fell face-flat onto the ground.
He wouldn't feel the forehead pressed against his in anguish. He couldn't see the pained expression on Axel's face as he gathered him into his arms and carried him. He never heard the whisper begging him to stay away. Nevertheless, Roxas knew that they had been there.
He woke up to Sora's incessant worry-laced nagging. "You better thank whoever it was who found you. He left you on the doorstep."
[bruises]
Roxas winced as Sora rubbed ointment into his left arm mercilessly. "Would it hurt to hold back just a little bit?" he demanded, wrenching his arm away from his twin and scowling heavily. "You treat it as if you're tendering meat!"
"For all I know I could be!" retorted Sora just as angrily. "I'm telling you, Roxas, the next time this happens to you, I'm going to the police. This is serious, Rox. You can get killed."
"And yet I'm still alive," said Roxas with a small smile. "It's not a big deal, Sora. I promise you. Now can you help me with my leg? It started bleeding again."
"Are you serious? You need to get stitches for that one! Don't even think about it!" yelped Sora when Roxas pulled out a needle and thread with a toothy grin. "Neither of us are qualified to give stitches and you need medical thread! Roxas, stop that!"
Dragging Roxas to the hospital after one of his 'episodes' was always an ordeal for Sora. Roxas would be equally anxious but for a different reason. It was hard to come up with a good excuse for all his bruises and for the third time this week too. Additionally, the nurses were starting to suspect that the Cloud was abusing Roxas.
Of course, Roxas did feel guilty. Despite being only distantly related - not that you could tell because of the family resemblance - Cloud had been too kind when he took them in after their parents died years ago. Because he was cold and passive, Cloud was often misunderstood. He would never hurt one of them.
Well...there was that one time the both of them blew up the kitchen. Their injuries had been minor but Roxas and Sora insisted on staying in the hospital because they were afraid of being alone in the apartment with Cloud with the blond was still furious with them.
"So," said Dr. Leonhart glaring at Sora and Roxas suspiciously as he propped up Roxas' leg on the chair so that he could stitch the wound, "the two of you expect me to believe that he got this from skateboarding?" He sighed when the twins nodded; Roxas enthusiastically while Sora wore a miserable expression that said he knew the excuse they had come up with was pathetic.
After Roxas' first visit, Dr. Leonhart stopped believing in any of the twins' excuses. From falling down a flight of stairs to running into a clown while he was juggling, their excuses grew more ludicrous with every visit that they had become the butt of jokes in the hospital recess room.
Dr. Leonhart was smart enough to notice the lack of a third party involvement in all the excuses. Roxas always blamed himself for the injuries but the occasional fist-shaped bruises told the doctor otherwise. SInce the twins were so determined to keep up their front, Dr. Leonhart decided not to call on their bluff.
However, Roxas' injuries this time had really been too severe. "I'm going to need your guardian's contact number," he said after finishing the stitches.
Roxas and Sora looked at him in alarm. "What for?" asked the blond.
"I need to make sure that he or she is looking after you," replied the good doctor. "You just visited me two days ago with a sprained ankle, Roxas. I want to meet the guardian who would let his or her charge go skateboarding with an ankle like that," he said, deciding to go along with Roxas' stupid excuse.
"Cloud had nothing to do with it!" exclaimed Roxas frantically. "He was out of town."
"Cloud, is it?" said Dr. Leonhart, cleaning up. "So it's Cloud Strife. I'm sure his name is in the phonebook somewhere."
Roxas felt like slapping his forehead. He turned to look at Sora pleadingly. You're my twin! Help me! he silently beseeched.
Sora quickly ran in front of the doctor and barred the exit with his body. "Please, doctor, don't tell cloud. He doesn't know anything about Roxas' injuries."
"So, you're telling me that Cloud Strife sees his charge coming home bloodied and bruised and doesn't find any reason to worry?" asked the doctor with a raise of his elegant eyebrow.
"We've always blamed it on Roxas' skateboard," mumbled Sora guiltily.
It seemed an eternity before Dr. Leonhart answered. "The next time Roxas comes in here injured without a good excuse, I'm calling Cloud. You hear me?" He would trust the boys one last time.
[bruises]
The most frustrating thing was that Roxas wouldn't even tell Sora who his attacker was. No matter how much Sora pushed and threatened, Roxas zipped his lip regarding his attacker. This confused Sora to no end. WHy would Roxas protect the person who was hurting him? Was he blackmailing Roxas or something?
That seemed the obvious reason but Roxas shook his head. "He doesn't/ In fact, he told me from day one to go to the police and get him arrested."
"But you didn't. Want to tell me why?" asked Sora hopefully.
Roxas shook his head adamantly. And that was that.
[bruises]
The swelling on his eye had gone down and the bruise on his cheek was fast fading away. But because both his legs still suffered injuries, Roxas stayed away from school for an entire week. When he finally returned, he scored yet another injury. This time Axel dislocated his shoulder.
[bruises]
This was the first time Cloud confronted them since the kitchen incident. He sat on one end of the round dining table while Sora and Roxas fidgeted nervously at the nervous end. Memory of their last encounter with an angry Cloud made them edge carefully away from their guardian.
Roxas currently made a very sorry sight indeed. His arm was in a sling, right calf completely wrapped in bandages, let ankle in a brace and multiple plasters adorned his arms. Next to him, Sora looked the picture of health.
"I received a call from a Dr. Leonhart from the emergency clinic," said Cloud, getting straight to the point. Such was his character. "He's concerned about the injuries Roxas Strife constantly receives and wonders why Roxas' guardian does not keep a closer eye on him."
Cloud crossed his arm. Never a good sign. "I let this matter slide over and over again because Sora assured me that you'd take care of it, Roxas. Getting more injuries when you return to school isn't what I would call 'taking care of it'."
The confrontation lapsed into silence. Neither of the twins wanted to speak and Cloud knew nothing would make them budge. He sighed and uncrossed his arms. End of confrontation. "Starting tomorrow, I'm driving you to and from school, Roxas."
"What?" exclaimed Roxas. "No!"
"Why not?" asked Cloud suspiciously. "If I didn't know any better, I would say that you actually want to run into your attacker, Roxas. Do you purposely let yourself get hit by him every time or something?"
Right on the nail. Roxas sunk deeper into his seat as Sora stared at him, wide eyed with disbelief. "Roxas, you've been letting him hit you?"
"Just give me one more day," murmured Roxas. "Let me go to school alone for one more day."
"So that you can come home dead?" asked Cloud.
Roxas looked up at Cloud pleadingly. "one day and I promise to do whatever you ask me to!"
The only reason Cloud relented was because he knew Roxas wouldn't give in until he resolved this matter himself. He wanted to let Roxas make his own mistakes and let him learn from them. He just hoped his trust in Roxas and Sora wasn't misplaced.
[bruises]
"You seriously have a death wish," said Axel with a fierce scowl. "What is it? Do you want me to finish you off because you're not brave enough to do it yourself? Or do you just get turned on at the thought of being hit? I know some people like it that way. Which one is it, Roxy?"
Whenever he faced Axel, Roxas tried his best to stand tall and look tough. But he knew that at the moment, he must've painted a rather miserable sight with his legs practically out of commission and one of his arms in a sling.
Still, he didn't want to back down. "Go ahead. Hit me."
"Why you little," Axel snarled darkly. He aimed a hard punch at Roxas, sorely wanted to break the blond's jaw, stop him from saying words that infuriated him so easily; that always touched a nerve for some reason. Instead, he grabbed the front of Roxas' shirt and lifted the boy off his feet.
Roxas dropped his crutch in surprise and grabbed Axel's hand with his one good hand. As Axel's grip on his shirt was suffocating him, he started to panic. Axel never did this before.
With a vicious snarl, Axel slammed Roxas against the nearest wall, knocking the breath out of him. Roxas keeled slightly, his breaths becoming more uneven from a mix of pain and panic as he felt Axel's warm breath close to his neck. His current position offered him no leverage to do anything at all.
There was no ground under his feet. The wall behind him was too smooth for his to grab. The only thing that connected him to this world right now was the gloved hand on his collar.
"Why don't you get it?" hissed Axel. "All I ever wanted from you was to leave me alone."
"Well I don't want to."
"Why?!" cried Axel, frustrated, as he threw Roxas away from him.
Roxas hit the ground roughly; the impact making him lose his breath for the second time. The asphalt tore his clothes and the skin on his back and also reopened the wound on his right leg. Blood was slowly seeping through the denim of his jeans. This time, it was harder to ignore the pain.
He groaned at the thought of having to clean that wound again. Dr. Leonhart was going to hate him. No, forget Dr. Leonhart. Cloud was going to massacre him. His only consolation was that he didn't land on his injured shoulder.
Roxas froze when he saw Axel appear next to him, crouching so that he was closer. The hotheaded young man saw the blood spreading through Roxas' jeans through a half-lidded gaze and lit a cigarette nonchalantly. "Is it so hard?" he asked quietly, exhaling a string of smoke. "Is it so hard for you to stay away from me?"
Not knowing how to reply or in fact, what to say at all, Roxas remained silent.
"That night when we first met," Axel continued in a tone so dead it gave Roxas shivers, "you weren't serious when you..." He paused to swallow. "When you told me that you loved me..."
Loud music. The smell of vomit. Wet gloves. Snow.
A bus stop in front of Seventh Heaven. A blond boy in a coat. A kind smile that looked so familiar.
"My name is"
Namine?
"Roxas."
Why do you look
Shiver.
so much like
"Are you crying?"
her?
"You're right," said Roxas. "I wasn't serious."
"Leave me alone!"
"How can I?"
Roxas continued, "But I wanted to know you."
"Why do you care?!"
"I wanted you."
Axel squeezed his eyes shut as memories from his first meeting with the insufferable blond flooded over. They had met on a night Axel never wanted to remember and he had been trying to get rid of Roxas ever since. Every single time, he would be minding his own business when Roxas came bursting into his life, demanding to be beaten up. Not literally of course.
It was just the things he said; the stuff he would do. Asking about his personal life, always trying to include himself into Axel's life when Axel wanted nothing to do with him. "Don't you know how to avoid trouble?" Axel finally said. "You're an idiot."
"I'm not." Roxas' immediate response stunned Axel. "I know that you never wanted to hurt me. And if you had really wanted me gone, I wouldn't be here right now."
"Don't give me a chance to hurt you, Roxas." This was the first time Axel had used his proper name. Eyes downcast, he was serious. "I can't give you anything."
"Then don't give me anything," replied Roxas simply. "I'll take everything. I will never leave you. Because you need me." Later, Axel would take Roxas' mobile phone and contact Sora, telling him his brother was injured again. Even later on, he would carry a pliant Roxas to his motorcycle on which he rode to the hospital in search of a Dr. Leonhart.
But before all that, he buried his head into Roxas' chest and teared silently, loving the smaller hand that stroked his bright red hair and delirious whispers promising him that his life will change. It broke Roxas' heart seeing Axel like this. It reminded him of when he first met Axel.
[bruises]
Dr. Leonhart was not amused. Intrigued maybe, but absolutely not amused. There was a fairly large blood stain on Roxas' pants and a serious bleeding wound on the back of his right shoulder. Dr. Leonhart was quite confident now that Roxas Strife was intent on taking his own life step by step.
"So where's your brother today?" he asked coldly as he pressed a cotton drenched with cold disinfectant against the blond's back wound. Roxas hissed in pain. Oh yeah, Dr. Leonhart was mad. "I thought he'd be here to help you make another stupid excuse."
Roxas chuckled sheepishly. "No stupid excuses today. Can't think of a good one." Actually, Sora was waiting outside. He didn't want to bear the brunt of Dr. Leonhart's anger for letting Roxas get hurt again.
"And who's the unfortunate redhead who brought you in today?" said Dr. Leonhart almost disinterestedly as he dressed the wound. "Your boyfriend?"
"I'm the one who did that to him," answered Axel, who had been leaning against the wall on the other side of the room, arms crossed and eyes hooded with displeasure. There was something about watching another man - especially one as good-looking as Dr. Leonhart - touch Roxas that made him edgy.
Dr. Leonhart raised an eyebrow. "If that's true then you are a pretty thorough man. A sprained left ankle, a right calf with a gaping wound, left shoulder dislocated and now a wound on the back of the right shoulder. Which limb were you planning to take out next?"
Axel shrugged, feigning nonchalance. "I'm out of options. His wrist maybe?"
"Yes, well, please wait there while I cause Roxas a huge amount of pain. Your dosage will come later when I hand you over to the authorities."
Cleaning the wound on Roxas' right leg wasn't pretty. Roxas bit his lip hard as Dr. Leonhart cleaned the dried blood, took out the stitches and redid them again. He was very grateful when Axel came over and embraced him lightly from behind, whispering several words of comfort. Dr. Leonhart's eyebrows jumped into his hairline but he made no comment and made clean work of Roxas' injury.
"If you ever come back here again with that wound re-opened, I will stitch it back with a sewing machine," he promised. "By the way, I asked the nurse to call your guardian. He should be here any minute now."
Roxas let out a loud cry of terror and Axel had to prevent Roxas from using his injured arms to clasp his head in horror. "Axel, you have to hide! Cloud has a sword! A really big sword! You have to -"
"Hi, Roxas," Cloud stood at the threshold of the room, leaning against the door jamb with First Tsurugi on his back.
Behind him, Sora scratched his head apologetically. "Sorry Rox. I tried to stop him."
"Nice friend you got there," said Cloud, looking at Axel, who, to his credit, looked unaffected by Cloud's presence. "How did you two meet?"
"We met outside Seventh Heaven," said Axel, not at all afraid of the sword that seemed to be as wide as his entire frame. "He wouldn't stop bugging me."
Cloud sighed exasperatedly. "I know there's a lot more to that, seeing as you're here but whatever. I'm charging you for all of Roxas' medical bills for the injuries you caused. I don't care if you have to beg to get all the money but have it paid to me in cash. Oh, there's one more thing -"
[bruises]
Every time they kissed, Roxas felt as if Axel was trying to steal life from him. As they rolled on the bed, both trying for dominance, they were interrupted by a loud knocking from the other side of the wall of Roxas' bedroom.
"Some people are trying to sleep here!" exclaimed a very annoyed Sora. "I know you guys are young and all but give it a rest!" Moments later, Axel and Roxas heard Sora banging on another wall, yelling, "Cloud, Leon - that goes for the two of you too! You guys aren't young anymore so give it a rest or your dicks will wilt and fall off!"
"Silence, munchkin!" was Dr. Leonhart's muffled reply as he had his way with Cloud.
"That's it!" growled Sora. "I'm going over to Riku's place. At least he can control his bloody hormones."
"Sora, I forbid you to go over to Riku's!" said Cloud.
"Why?" asked the brunet angrily.
"Because that douche will fuck you six ways into Monday," Roxas contributed.
"No, unlike you people, Riku is STRAIGHT!" Sora finished with an infuriated yell before slamming the front door of their apartment shut.
"That's what he wants you to think," muttered Dr. Leonhart.
"Shouldn't we go and protect your brother's innocence?" whispered Axel after all had quieted down.
"Nah, he has it coming to him," replied Roxas with a shrug.
It's been five years since Roxas got his leg re-stitched, two since Cloud and Dr. Leonhart got together, one and a half since Sora and Riku met. Roxas turned to his side to stare at Axel. The mood was gone and Axel was already on his way to sleep. He reached out, caressing Axel's cheek, fingers lingering on the tattoo under his eye.
Axel sighed contentedly, much to Roxas' amusement. "Can you believe it?" he said softly, not really caring if Axel was already asleep and therefore could not hear him. "I never imagined that the guy who sent me to the hospital regularly would be having wild, torrid sex with me dead into the night."
As it was, Axel was still awake. He opened his eyes barely, considered the boy who slept beside him willingly. "Roxas," he began, voice raspy from sleepiness, "that night when we first met...I never told you why I was...never told you what happened..."
"I don't want to know." The resolute tone in Roxas' voice surprised Axel. "We're not lovers, Axel. I'm not supposed to know intimate things about you. You sleep with me because you need someone to be here for you and I do the same because I need to make sure that you're alright. Neither of us is in love with each other so you don't have to tell me anything."
"What if...we fall in love with each other?"
Roxas laughed. "I can't believe I'm hearing this from you of all people, Axel. Don't worry. That will never happen. We're just sleeping with each other for the benefits, right? Ngh, I have to sleep now. I have class early tomorrow."
Why had I been so afraid of hurting you when you're the one hurting me most?
As Roxas fell fast asleep beside him Axel touched the scar on his stomach that Cloud had given him years ago in the hospital. Dr. Leonhart had to give him thirteen stitches and had glared unceasingly at Cloud. Years later, they were in love. Axel's stomach clenched.
I want what they have. He didn't want to go back to the wreck he had once been; the same wreck who had been sobbing quietly in the bus stop when a blond called Roxas had found him; the same wreck who had been trying in vain to wash off the smell of Namine's blood in the back toilet of Seventh Heaven only moments before - the wreck that was Axel.
Roxas had pulled him out of his self-imposed darkness and made it easier to live with himself. But he knew he couldn't run away forever. He had debts to pay to his past. He owed that much to Namine.
It was good that Roxas wasn't in love with him. It was convenient. And it really didn't matter that Roxas didn't know that Axel was in love with him because Axel was leaving. There was no goodbye kiss as he packed his things quietly and left the apartment hours before the rest of the house woke up. Axel only allowed himself one look of longing before he closed the door and let himself out.
Sora returned the next evening with a strange limp in his walk that he hoped no one would notice. Cloud was out doing his job so that only left Roxas at home. Sora pushed the door open and saw Roxas sitting lifelessly in front of his desk. "Roxas?" he called.
But Roxas didn't reply. In his hand was Axel's mobile phone. The redhead had cut all connections and had disappeared.
Two weeks passed without news about Axel until one day, Riku found him on the third page of the daily newspaper. He showed it to Sora and Roxas, who by coincidence was also in the room.
'Axel (last name undisclosed) is charged with the murder of his stepsister, Namine. He is to spend a lifetime behind bars.' The grainy photo of him in the newspaper didn't do him justice. The monochromatic quality hid the bright red of his hair, shadowed the fire Roxas sometimes saw in his brilliant green eyes. The picture was ruined when Roxas' tears fell on it.
"What if...we fall in love with each other?" To think that those had been Axel's last words to him. What if...
It was a big, stupid 'what if'.
A/N: Would you guys kill me if I said OWARI?
edit: Rest assured, I'm working on a sequel thanks to so many people encouraging me to do it. Thanks for your support!