DISCLAIMER: Not mine! Joss owns everything except me.....
NOTES: Just some drabble I wrote tonight when I was feeling a little sad.
River's POV......no special time......fits anywhere in the series.
ALL THE KINGS HORSES
SO ALONE ......it's a whisper in her mind that haunts her.
It's the thought that keeps her up at night, the thought that won't let her sleep, that keeps peace away.
There is no peace to be had here ...not anymore. It was torn out and now ...she does not know where to turn.
It's a sad knowledge, sadness so profound that it paralyses ......weighs on her like an anchor pulling her into the deep.
But there are no more tears ..She cried them all......there is nothing left.
So Alone ......
Simon tries ....so hard, but he can never understand. No matter how hard he tries, he cannot comfort her .....
Sometimes she does not understand herself, sometimes she cannot feel, cannot see herself ......as though there is nothing left of her either.
They all look at her, but they cannot see....her. They all see different things, reflecting them back to her like a mirror.
There is nothing that she recognises in the girl they see, nothing she remembers ever being.
She does not need to burn to be in purgatory......This is hell. Hell enough for her.....
She remembers her, the sweet, gentle girl ...so wise beyond her years. She was always ready to smile and the memory of her laughter is intoxicating. But the feeling never lasts; nothing does.....the further she crawls the deeper she falls back.
She can remember her ...but she does not recognize her ....does not know her. She is gone and nothing will ever bring her back again. Nothing ....that life is lost to her .....Forever.
All the king's horses and all the kings' men .....
Clinging to every last glimpse of a life she can never lead again .....
Normalcy is beyond reach.