I can't believe this. Peter…how could you betray us?
After all we've been through together…don't you remember all our hours of laughter and fun? All the pranks we played, all the arguments we overcame,everything we did…
We were friends! More than that, we were the Marauders. That means we're brothers. Does that mean nothing to you?
I know it doesmean something to you – I know you well enough to know that you must have spent hours arguing with yourself. Debating what to do. You're just that kind of person, Wormtail.
But still, if you worried so much about it, why did you still choose to betray us? All those times I stopped Sirius from going too far when he teased you…even Sirius didn't mean to really hurt you. And Remus – he's the one who always helped you with your homework. You're about to kill all of us. Do you realize, Pete?
So why?
God, there's no way of describing how I feel. We're too close for me to be angry at you, I don't feel a single seed of anger in me. Confusion, sadness, yes. But not anger.
What are you trying to accomplish by this? What are you trying to say? Weren't we good enough friends? What did we do? Why did you change?
Do you think joining Voldemort is going to be better than sticking with friends who have been with you all your life? Supporting you, being there for you whenever you need someone.
Do you remember, Pete? How we used to stay up at night sometimes, talking for hours until Remus told everyone to bloody shut up. Do you remember, how we'd sit in the Great Hall, with all our friends? Do you remember how it feels, so warm and happy? Why would you want to leave all that?
Wormy, I don't understand…what are you trying to say?
That's all that's repeating in my head. Why did you do this? How could you betray me – us – like this?
I don't feel numb with shock. My mind isn't exactly whirring. I feel calm, if anything else. A calm grey, with black swirls of confusion and teary dots of bittersweet as I remember all our experiences.
I wish I could tell you to take back your words, your actions. Take it all back, let's pretend nothing ever happened. We're still close friends. Forever.
But hell, I know we can't do that. This is going to stay in my memory for eternity. Whenever I think of you, my friend, again, these thoughts will always lurk around like a foul smell. I don't wish I were you, and I don't wish I could do the suffering for you. That's what all the noble heroes say, isn't it? But I don't wish that. The only thing I wish is that it could just go away.
I'm not sure what it is. Maybe it's all your resentful feelings. Maybe it's fear. Maybe it's what ripped us Marauders apart, something we all thought was impossible. I feel like crying, but I can't cry. I feel like I should cry, but no tears come and I doubt any will. I feel like falling asleep, just forgetting all this. I don't want this, I want things to go back to how they were before…
Peter.
A Marauder.
A brother.
Wormtail..
Why?
As James Potter stood in the doorway, facing the most evil wizard of all time, shouting to his family, red eyes gleam down at him. James looks into them, and only sadness fill his face as he prepares for his final fate. A wand raises…and green light flashes through the house.
Far away, curled up in a corner, sobs rack the body of a scrawny rat with only one toe on a paw. What has he done? The world goes black as he falls into the dark arms of his future…