Nottingham is taking care of Sara. Has he gone too far?
Standard disclaimers apply.
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Sara came home from a long day at work. What a day - bizarre cases, uncooperative witnesses, Dante yelling. And Danny took the day off to take his kid for braces.
She was looking forward to laying on the couch, eating frozen yogurt, and watching something that would take her mind off this insane world - "Farscape".
As she approached her apartment door the Witchblade signaled an intruder. Mentally she braced for trouble as she opened the door very quietly and cautiously peeked into the apartment.
Well, surprise, if it wasn't Nottingham, putting away groceries! Had she caught him unaware?
"Boo!" Sara barked. Ian jumped, giving her the first reason to smile that day. She relished the accomplishment of startling the infamous Nottingham.
Ian explained his presence while retrieving a package of spaghetti off the floor and putting away his weapon. "Hello, Sara, I knew you were out of some things so I picked them up." His breathing was already under control.
"Ian, you have to stop getting me groceries." Sara went into the kitchen to look at what Ian had bought. "It's one of life's little mysteries that I've managed to figure out."
"Yes, you are capable of buying groceries but we both know you eat take-out instead of shopping." Ian went back to putting away groceries. He knew where everything went.
Sara looked in a bag. "Salt? I didn't know I was out of salt."
"There is only a quarter of an inch in the salt shaker." Ian explained.
"OK, good choice of olive oil. Thanks. But this" Sara held up a can. "I don't need anymore mushroom soup. I've got a shelf full!"
"It was on sale. I know you enjoy tuna casserole and nutritionally it's better than . . ." Ian was saying when she interrupted.
"Come on, Ian, I've got enough mushroom soup and tuna to have tuna casserole twice a week for the next six months! I probably won't live that long! Besides you got the cheap tuna. It's tastes fishy!"
"Tuna is fish, Sara" Ian said without expression.
"You know what I mean!" Sara growled. "And what the hell is this!!" Sara held up a small cardboard box.
"It's ccmmmms" Ian mumbled.
"What! Speak up! I don't know what you just said but I can read! Condoms!? Just *who* the hell do you think is going to get lucky around here?"
Ian tucked his head down and looked at her with big, innocent eyes. "It's just . . . you *are* dating and you might meet someone and you might . . . want to . . . " He resorted to mumbling again. "Remember the first time with your last lover . . . you didn't have anything and you were lucky . . ."
"OK, OK, that's it!" Sara was getting as red as Dante did when he was at his best.
"Get out! And take your condoms with you!" She threw the box at Ian's head. "I don't even want to know how you know we didn't use condoms the first time! And I don't even use that brand!"
Ian caught the box easily. He opened his mouth and closed it again as he thought better of telling her how he had deduced that particular slip-up.
And he didn't tell her that the brand he had selected was better suited for sporadic, marathon affairs then the brand that she bought.
So without saying another word Ian left. He was going to have to suspend the grocery shopping for a while or make sure he brought them when she was gone.
Right now he wanted to be far, far away when she looked in that other shopping bag containing battery operated toys designed for the single woman.
Standard disclaimers apply.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sara came home from a long day at work. What a day - bizarre cases, uncooperative witnesses, Dante yelling. And Danny took the day off to take his kid for braces.
She was looking forward to laying on the couch, eating frozen yogurt, and watching something that would take her mind off this insane world - "Farscape".
As she approached her apartment door the Witchblade signaled an intruder. Mentally she braced for trouble as she opened the door very quietly and cautiously peeked into the apartment.
Well, surprise, if it wasn't Nottingham, putting away groceries! Had she caught him unaware?
"Boo!" Sara barked. Ian jumped, giving her the first reason to smile that day. She relished the accomplishment of startling the infamous Nottingham.
Ian explained his presence while retrieving a package of spaghetti off the floor and putting away his weapon. "Hello, Sara, I knew you were out of some things so I picked them up." His breathing was already under control.
"Ian, you have to stop getting me groceries." Sara went into the kitchen to look at what Ian had bought. "It's one of life's little mysteries that I've managed to figure out."
"Yes, you are capable of buying groceries but we both know you eat take-out instead of shopping." Ian went back to putting away groceries. He knew where everything went.
Sara looked in a bag. "Salt? I didn't know I was out of salt."
"There is only a quarter of an inch in the salt shaker." Ian explained.
"OK, good choice of olive oil. Thanks. But this" Sara held up a can. "I don't need anymore mushroom soup. I've got a shelf full!"
"It was on sale. I know you enjoy tuna casserole and nutritionally it's better than . . ." Ian was saying when she interrupted.
"Come on, Ian, I've got enough mushroom soup and tuna to have tuna casserole twice a week for the next six months! I probably won't live that long! Besides you got the cheap tuna. It's tastes fishy!"
"Tuna is fish, Sara" Ian said without expression.
"You know what I mean!" Sara growled. "And what the hell is this!!" Sara held up a small cardboard box.
"It's ccmmmms" Ian mumbled.
"What! Speak up! I don't know what you just said but I can read! Condoms!? Just *who* the hell do you think is going to get lucky around here?"
Ian tucked his head down and looked at her with big, innocent eyes. "It's just . . . you *are* dating and you might meet someone and you might . . . want to . . . " He resorted to mumbling again. "Remember the first time with your last lover . . . you didn't have anything and you were lucky . . ."
"OK, OK, that's it!" Sara was getting as red as Dante did when he was at his best.
"Get out! And take your condoms with you!" She threw the box at Ian's head. "I don't even want to know how you know we didn't use condoms the first time! And I don't even use that brand!"
Ian caught the box easily. He opened his mouth and closed it again as he thought better of telling her how he had deduced that particular slip-up.
And he didn't tell her that the brand he had selected was better suited for sporadic, marathon affairs then the brand that she bought.
So without saying another word Ian left. He was going to have to suspend the grocery shopping for a while or make sure he brought them when she was gone.
Right now he wanted to be far, far away when she looked in that other shopping bag containing battery operated toys designed for the single woman.