A/N: So, you can guess where this story was inspired from. Yes--all gayly written fanfiction that exists on this site to date! It brings tears to my eyes that we have to deal with corny Mary-Sues, OOCness (without warning too!), cliche plots, and the whole. Horrible. Schpeel.

So in protest of such carnage in the fanfiction world, I have written so far one chapter out of a three-shot story! For your entertainment and awareness of this horrible situation. Let us all endeavor to rid the internet of such evils! With laughter and (hopefully) great revelations, we will have our victory over this darkness~

Anyway, enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own 10 Things I Hate About You. Or Mary Sues. Or cliche intents. Or OOC characters. Gawd, I hope I don't.

It was another day of school. Kat drove her newly biodieseled car to school—then went back because she forgot her sister at home. Why did I forget my sister, of all times? I feel so terrible and miserable inside… wait, am I turning OOC??

Bianca, of course, of course was mortified. So she turned on the radio and listened to Linkin Park on the way to school. Kat of course, wasn't too happy that her sister chose what they listened to for the third time that week.

"Hey, that's not cool, you know."

"What's not cool?" Bianca attempted her best pout. Though sadly it never worked on her sister… maybe if she practiced it would work on Cameron.

"That you didn't turn to NPR. What will happen to the world while I'm not listening?" Kat asked in her usual strong feminism. Not that it was the real tone she chose to talk with all the time… she supposed the author of the story just didn't know how else to describe it.

"Well, forget it!" Bianca half-screamed. "You practically FORGOT me at home, so that makes this THE NEW DIVIDE!! We are NOT sisters anymore, you got me?!"

Kat was pretty much stunned. No, not by the fact that her sister actually knew the name to the newest Linkin Park release, but that she could practically see her sister's personality spin around a hundred-eighty degrees.

There was this silence on the car. No, not the literal silence. But you know, the kind that made damsels caught in the evil clutches of 'the time of month' actually calm down… and then again, brought out the best, heartfelt apologies. Cliché normally didn't come with the package, unless there was fluff in it of course. But hopefully that didn't apply in this situation.

"Look Bianca, I'm sorry for being selfish. I guess my stupid characterization got to me."

"Your stupid what?"

"I don't know… I feel like the person that's writing my—oh, nevermind."

"Yeah, I'm sorry for being selfish too," Bianca muttered.

Kat smiled. Like, not her usual smile. The kind that was cute and made guys think of Barbie and unicorns.

"Yeah, let's hug—I don't think we've done that in the movie either."

"What?"

"Nothing."

So the two sisters hugged, and sobbed on each other's shoulders. Eventually, the Niagara Falls of Estrogen (and OOCness) stopped, and sniffing, they both said their goodbyes and headed to class

Kat walked in her Geometry class (that she wasn't supposed to be in, but they—no, she meant the fanfic writer—made a mistake), and braced herself for scolding from the teacher. Thank goodness she didn't get any, because the fanfic writer forgot about that too.

One thing that she wasn't spared from was the blonde bimbo that was being introduced in front of the class… apparently as a new student.

"Hello class," the teacher-without-a-name said cheerfully. "We have a new student here today, from INSERTTOWNHERE, INSERTSTATE. Please make Mary Sue feel welcome!"

The majority of the class was asleep, so only a few took notice of the new student. But two people in the class noticed all too clearly—Kat, and Patrick. Kat shielded her eyes as she went to sit down so that she wouldn't be blinded by Mary Sue's fake highlights and smiling, commercial-white teeth. But Patrick only saw one thing: the new student definitely had C cups.

Mary Sue saw only one thing too. Smiling beautifully (cause we know there's only one word to describe a Mary Sue's smile), she walked over to the empty desk right next to Patrick Verona. As she sat down gracefully on a well-rounded butt, Patrick couldn't help but wish he were the seat of that chair… not that he had any sexual intent in it. Think of it as Shakespeare.

Kat noticed all of this, and scowled to herself. When the assignment for the day came around, she couldn't work… all she found herself doing was writing death threats about Mary Sue on her paper. And 'I 3 Patrick Verona' notes seemed to escape from her pen too.

Eventually she realized that she wouldn't be able to turn in her assignment like that, so she asked teacher-without-a-name for a new one. Though he crinkled his eyes in confusion, he still gave her a new sheet. Kat went to throw her old paper away, and then went back to her seat to do her assignment.

The rest of the class passed by like an author experiencing writer's block.

Eventually the bell rang. Kat stomped madly out of the room, as mad girls are wont to do. She went to her locker, jerked it open (in this particular case, combination locks don't exist), and started throwing all the pictures she had of Patrick out. She was no longer going to be Out Of Character for him.

Then some rabid fangirl (that probably didn't belong in the series anyway) screamed with genuine moe, swooped down, and ran away with the photos in her arms. Kat rolled her eyes and slammed her locker door shut.

It was now lunch. Bianca was sitting alone, being that her Katy Perry friend wasn't there and no other cheerleader felt she was quality Worth-As-Lunch-Companion. Cameron debated Thoreauistically with himself whether he should sit with her. To be, or not to be the gentleman. Or you can say Gay Best Friend. Gah… he still needed to convince her about his heterosexualness.

In the end, he played his part and sat down next to her. Bianca looked up at him and smiled.

"Hey Cameron!"

"Hey Bianca," Cameron couldn't get over how cute of a Barbie she was. Hopefully he would be her Ken. Wait, was that just fluff?

Bianca went back to her meal of hotpockets, and Cameron wondered if he should get her a martini and Filet Mignon. And candlesticks… maybe some roses. You know, just to spiff up the romance. Cause neither the show's screenwriters or the author were doing anything.

"So Cameron, I was thinking," Bianca began.

His heart started beating fast. Was this going to be a confession of her newly realized love? Of appreciation for all he's done to win her heart? That they belong together in an fairytale palace and white horses and a cute, baby girl like Tom Cruise's? Without the weird name…

"…So I was thinking that we need to take this relationship to another level," Bianca said with that perfectly mesmerizing smile. Gawd, she would put all the Mary Sues in the fanfiction world to shame.

"Yes?" Cameron breathed. He hardly could believe his luck. One day his fanfiction site closed down "due to the amount of story-suckage overload"… and well, the next day he finally won his dream—

"I think we're at a good point," Bianca went on. Cameron hung on her every word like a romance-starved fanfiction reader would. "in our relationship, that we can exchange some more favors."

"Really, princess? What do you need?" Cameron's heart was in his mouth.

"Excuse me?" Bianca blinked, nonplussed.

"Nothing. Go on," he muttered.

"So, there's this guy in my history class," Cameron's heart dropped all the way down, "that I like. I was hoping that you knew him—his name is Chad Spytt."

Cameron nodded reluctantly. "Yeah, he sits next to me."

Bianca's eyes brightened. "So can you, you know… drop a word about me? He recently broke up with his girlfriend, and he'll need comfort."

Like Vladimir in that other fanfic, he thought. Still, he couldn't bear giving away his precious jewel to even a guy that needed someone at the moment. It's like losing his Elizabeth, and he was Darcy.

Not that he read Pride and Prejudice…

Well, just maybe the fanfiction.

"Cameron?"

Cameron suddenly was faced with Bianca's hopeful, doe-like eyes. Well, maybe he could do this. In the name of Bianca Stratford, he will.

Hopefully reading more fanfics will teach him how to win her for sure…

A/N: So... how did ya'll like ;). Let me know! I shall continue my second part tomorrow, and hopefully have it on by then. Thanks for reading!