A/N: Dedicated to Spring Zephyr, who seriously hate Hanz's geta.
We were talking about the cheerleader LBX you receive before battling Master Otaku, and the idea of Dak totally being into using it came to mind. Thus, crack fic time.
I've only played the English version, so English names.
Oh, there's another reason for this. I feel like trolling today.
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A flash of pink, faster than the boy could follow slammed into his Bulldoze, knocking the heavyweight LBX off balance and into the water. A tap, and it was back in the air, large scythe coming down.
He quickly commanded his LBX to stand up and dodge, the blade missing by a hair and clanking off the rock. Two back steps, and he switched to his rocket launcher, intent of striking from afar.
But the opponent was fast.
They dodged to the left, running past the shell and slashing again, this time hitting its mark in a combo of four hits before he was grounded. It pulled back before he was able to stand, recharging quickly.
The Special Attack Routine was to be expected, the flurry of attacks ending with an explosion that signified his defeat.
"Damn it!" He cried, as pieces of his LBX flew from the stadium. The pink one turned to him and shook as if chuckling, before jumping onto its owner's shoulder.
"As expected, it's my win." The figure mocked, hood hiding all but the smirk on his face. "Seriously, did you pull that thing out of a trash heap or something? Lame."
He ignored the boy as he dropped to his knees in frustration, turning around and walking out of the alley. Once he was in the light he removed the LBX from his shoulder and pulled down his hood, running his fingers over the sleek frame, turning it around a few times.
"No scratches, no stains... nope, still in perfect condition." He said cheerfully, moving to put it away before a familiar clicking sound and voice caused him to freeze.
"Dak? What the hell are you doing?"
He nearly jumped out of his skin, quickly stuffing the Sakura-0 model into his jacket and turning to the speaker, scowling when he saw who it was.
"Hanz. I didn't think you would wander this far from your little cave to find me. Should I feel honored?" Hanz snorted.
"Don't delude yourself, I'm not here for you. I got a challenge from some kid that thinks he's hot stuff."
Dak glanced back down the alley, at the boy who was still slumped on the ground and gathering up the pieces of his now destroyed LBX.
He opted not to say anything. Hanz's reaction to finding his opponent already defeated would be amusing.
"And what about you." The larger boy said, pointing an accusatory finger at Dak. He rolled his eyes.
"Nothing you need to know. Actually, I was just on my way home. You know, things to do, people to make miserable."
"You've got some terrible hobbies."
"And you have some ugly shoes."
He was stalling, attempting a distraction as he attempted to discreetly slip the LBX into his jacket's inside pocket.
Of course Hanz noticed. At this distance, he'd be an idiot not to - though Dak was really hoping he was an idiot.
"What are you hiding there?" He asked suspiciously. Dak took a step back, shifting around casually.
"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not hiding anything." Hanz didn't look like he believed it for a second.
"Really? Because I could have sword I saw you shove that gaudy Sakura-0 LBX into your jacket just now."
At that, Dak sputters, attempting an incoherent excuse while Hanz smirked.
"I am not using that girly frame! What he hell, man?"
"Unless you convinced Amy to lend you Pandora - which I highly doubt - I don't know any other LBX close to that color."
"Kunoichi." He said flatly, which was waved off.
"If you're not hiding anything, then what's up with your hand?" Hanz said, gesturing to his current position. "People don't usually walk around with their hands in their shirts, you know."
Dak thought for a split second before the response came out.
"Well, maybe I just like touching-"
"No, stop talking, I know where you're going and I don't want to hear it." Hanz said, cutting him off with a raised hand, massaging his temples. It was Dak's turn to smirk, but it quickly faded when Hanz looked back at him. "Just make this easier for both of us and show me what it is."
Dak didn't bother replying, huffing indignantly and attempting to walk past Hanz.
"Hold on." Hanz said, catching him by the elbow. "Since you're here anyway, let's have an LBX battle. I could use a warm-up."
"No way." He snapped, jerking away. "Didn't you hear me? I've got lives to ruin and trashy LBX to tear apart. I don't have time to mess with you."
"But you had time to crush a kid using a pretty pink LBX?"
There was a short silence as Dak stared at him with a perplexed expression.
"I cannot believe you just said that." He said. Hanz shrugged.
"I thought it'd bother you. Looks like it did."
He clicked his tongue, turning around again. There was another click, and he glanced behind him to see Hanz holding out his eXtroller, the screen facing towards Dak.
He froze. Blinked. Paled, then turned an amazing shade of pink.
"Delete that." Hanz's smirk returned full force and doubled, reveling in Dak's predicament.
"Nah, I think I'll send it to everyone else." He said, lifting the device above his head when Dak reached for it. "I mean, we were all wondering where it disappeared to, but I'm sure they'll be glad to know someone as skilled as you is taking care of it."
Dak glared at him, pulling the LBX from his jacket.
"I'm not using it, I'm just raising up the AC for my sister." He said. It was complete and utter bull, and Hanz knew it, but he said it and now it was out there.
"Sure you are. And I suppose there's a reason Harlequin's head is still on it." Was the blasé response. Without looking, he entered the message screen on his eXtroller and managed to attach the photo to an outgoing message, selecting his entire contacts. Dak's glare hardened.
"Don't you dare."
"Then admit you were using it."
Really? He just wanted to be right?
"Fine. I was using the girly LBX in battle. Happy?" He blinked when the screen was in front of him again. It wasn't on the message screen.
It was recording.
"Now I am." Hanz said, quickly pocketing the device and turning down the alley. "I'll send you copies later!"
"You suck!" Dak shouted, then feeling the buzz of his own eXtroller, pulled it out. It was from Hanz. "Fine, go ahead and fight your stupid opponent! He doesn't have an LBX to fight with anyway!"
The clicking sound was starting to get to him, as Hanz walked in short steps.
"And take your stupid geta noises with you!"
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A/N: Originally, this was going to be a pure crack fic of Dak cooing over Sakura-0, but then Hanz came into the picture and I thought "omg I can use this." I also ended up keeping Harlequin's head on the actual model when I was altering his frame. I got a good laugh out of that.
And for my trolling, this makes sixty-five fics! I WIN.