The Fan Mail
by incessant insanity
Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation or the characters; hopefully, however, I do own the plot of this little story!
6:21 PM
Dear Yuki-sensei,
I am not writing this letter to waste your time; there is an important matter with which I would like to address with you.
As you and I both know, there is some controversy going around about you and your "lover", Shindo-san. I am one of those people who believe that this relationship, if not just a really dangerous public stunt, is a very bad idea. First off, I have seen posters of Shindo-san and I have seen some of his shows on TV. To be honest, you could do better, and especially with someone who looks the part of a minor. I am not offering anything, I am just stating that Shindo-san's looks and behavior are key reasons as to why your "relationship" is always on the gossip hotline.
Another reason is that I don't understand. People are opposed, usually, to which they don't understand. And right now, I do not get what you see in that singer. He is a ditz by nature, it seems, not dependable, and only causes you trouble. Also, I would assume intelligence attracts intelligence. From what I've seen... Shindou-san couldn't even figure out 2 plus 2 equals 4 even if you wrote it out for him. News has also reached the tabloids that he is just using you for your apartment and your writing skills for his lyrics. I am not saying that these things are true, but I wouldn't be surprised if they were.
Since a few years ago, you've been one of my biggest idols. You can write, and write well, and take a totally trashy genre and turn it into something enjoyable with twists and turns only usually found in action or adventure novels. I can't believe the literary achievements that you've accomplished alone. And to be blunt, I think that if you stay with Shindo-san, your career will be damaged. Please think about what you are doing.
A worried, loyal fan
"UWAH! YUKI, ALL YOUR FANS HATE ME!"
"Good. I don't particularly like you either."
"YU-KI!"
"What?"
"Seriously, your fans don't like me at all!"
"... Brat, are you reading my mail again?"
"..."
"Shuichi..."
"Eep!"
"What have I told you about going through my stuff!"
"Well, I was just curious! Usually your editors and publishing company get all the mail and then just throw it away! You never get a fan letter directly addressed to the apartment!"
"That's still none of your business. I'm actually surprised you can think so logically."
"You're so mean to me, Yuki! And besides, I got a letter addressed to me too and it mentioned a letter sent to you, so it is sort of my business anyway! Nyah!"
"What kind of letter?"
"Lemme read it to you... Ahem:
"Dear Shindo-san,
"To be frank, I do not like you. I will not soften my words so please believe me when I say that everything you read will be the truth from my perspective. I believe that you are just using Yuki-sensei, whether purposely or not. I have heard that Yuki-sensei has been spotted recuperating in the hospital before, nursing a bleeding stomach ulcer. His job surely is not the problem as he has been writing for years now without any sign of harmful stress. This is only happening because you are there with him.
"Also, when Yuki-sensei announced your relationship with him on TV, I believe that you cornered him into saying something. What else could he have said after you barged out on television, butchering up his excuses horribly? I think that youare the only one who has the drive in this "relationship" of yours.
"If you were really good for Yuki-sensei, I think in public it would be easier to see the difference in Yuki-sensei. He is usually extremely polite, but it does not take a genius to see that he only indulges in his fans because they buy his novels. This has not changed a bit, and shows that your influence on him is nothing but an annoyance, if anything.
"Also, I find that your songs are distasteful and poorly written. You often write about mushy, teen age love, and to me, this says that you know nothing about real, deep love. Thus, you are just mistaking your infatuation with love and are just going to hurt yourself in the long run; you really don't know anything!
"I feel like I could go on and add at least three more pages to this letter, but I feel that I've sufficiently made my point and that any more would simply be insulting. My letter is not written with the intent to hurt, Shindou-san, only to open your eyes to a fan's perspective.
"If you are smart, then you have considered my reasoning and have realized that the best thing you could do for this "relationship" would be to call if off and write your own songs. If you are too immature or deficient to take heed to my opinions, I should let you know that I have also sent a letter to Yuki-sensei; he will definitely be able to take my suggestions into intelligent and mature consideration.
"A worried, loyal fan of Yuki-sensei's
"... Yuki... are you laughing? You- you are! Bastard, this letter was someannn, how can you laugh at my pain?"
Yuki sniggered again, softly, glasses glinting in the light. "Very easily, moron. Ah, wow, I really need to reply to this person, maybe start a correspondence or something. Was there a return address on the envelope?"
Watery eyes, a sniffle, a "YUKI, YOU BIG JERK!". Shuichi ripped the letter in two, raced out the door and out of the apartment in record time, foregoing the slamming of the door in favor of neck-breaking speed.
Yuki watched him go, one eyebrow raised, and one hand reaching for the cigarettes in his pocket. Hn, it wasn't his fault that Shuichi was entirely too sensitive and didn't know when Yuki was messing with him. Whatever, it didn't affect him.
He turned back to his laptop to finish his chapter off.
... but then again, Shuichi being hurt meant that he would suck at singing (even more so than usual) and that meant that his bandmates would come and annoy him until he went and sort of apologized and Shuichi fully forgave him. Or whatever. That cycle just pissed him off.
... the kid really was kind of upset, too, Yuki thought reluctantly, body stiff as he glanced at the empty envelope lying on the floor. Should he?
Yuki reached for the envelope, drawing up a new writing document on his laptop, and scowling at the screen. The brat would never find out about this, otherwise his entire reputation would go straight down the drain and then Shuichi would never leave him alone.
He ignored the small part of him that felt satisfaction.
9:03 AM
Next Morning
Yuki was not a man who got worried. He didn't do "worried". It just wasn't in him. Paranoia, maybe, fear, sometimes, but worrying? Nope.
But the brat hadn't come back yet, and it was already 9 in the morning. Yuki had fallen asleep, exhausted, at around 7:30 last night and had just assumed that the brat would have come back while he was dead to the world. Or, at the very least, stayed with Hiro, in which the level-headed guitarist would have called him to let him know at some point in time. However, K had come around 10 minutes ago, ready to pick him up for work, only to find that Yuki had no idea where he was. The writer had nonchalantly suggested that he was at Hiro's house, despite the fact that he had received no call, but K had just shook his head, for the guitarist was already at NG Studios and was waiting for Shuichi's arrival.
It was around then that Yuki had felt a small inkling of some weird emotion he wasn't used to. He refused to call it worry.
Twitching and irritated, the author had gone out to the park (under the pretense that the apartment had been too stuffy, what with him smoking so much lately) and discreetly looked around, only to come back empty-handed and even more twitchy and irritated than before.
Where was the damn idiot? At a bar, passed out? There was no way Yuki was going to every bar nearby to look for him, though; that was just a stupid idea, one not even worthy of a second thought.
... but he had been out all night... where could he have slept if not at Hiro's place? Not with Tatsuha, because his little brother would have called him from whatever hotel or would have brought him home. Not with that even-more-troublesome idiot, Sakuma Ryuichi, because he would have called Tohma and Tohma would've told K.
His parent's house? That was probably his best bet. Maybe he should give them a ring? No, no, that was just ridiculous. Why go to all that trouble, just for Shuichi? It wasn't like he was worried or anything, and it would suck if the singer was actually there and got the wrong hint that Yuki cared for him or something ridiculous like that.
Still...
No. No, no, no.
9:14 AM
"So you think the plot was a bit thin in my last book?"
"Just a tiny bit, Yuki-san. I mean, I could practically tell that Mina was going to get that seizure earlier than expected. You made up for it, though, when you introduced Kyosuke as her actual half brother – that, I didn't expect!"
"Ah, thank you, Maiko-san..."
Alright, so he had caved (in less than 15 minutes even). Well, no, he hadn't caved, per se, he was just in need for some feedback from his audience for his latest novel and Maiko was easy to get in touch with.
"Yuki-san..."
"Yes?"
"You wouldn't be calling, by any chance, because of my brother, would you?"
"...No."
"Another fight, Yuki-san?"
Women and their damn intuition. "Is he there?"
"No, he isn't. He actually hasn't stopped by in a while; mom and dad are getting antsy to see him."
"I see."
"I'm sorry, Yuki-san. I'll keep my eye out for him, though."
"Alright." After a moment, Yuki tacked on a detached, "Thank you." before hanging up and letting his head fall back and hit the wall. Tch. That brat wasn't even worth the trouble...
2:01 PM
That Afternoon
It was now 2 in the afternoon, and Yuki was past denying that he was worried. For god's sake, he had even called Hiro and asked the guitarist to list some of Shuichi's favorite bars so he could go check them out! All this trouble for that one brat, who was probably doing something equally troublesome just to keep his reputation going.
Damn it.
This was going too far. Yuki didn't do things like worry or caving in or looking for people. He had no one to worry about, he would never cave in for anything or anyone, and people came to him, not the other way around. And yet... he found himself going past the Yuki-extremes and beyond, just to make sure that idiot was all right.
Headaches. Shuichi was giving him headaches. Tiredly, Yuki shuffled over to the kitchen area, snatched a couple of Advils, and dry-swallowed them down.
"Yuki- Yuki- Yukiiiiiiii! Are you feeling okay? Do you need to lie down? Do you need me to get you anything, make you something to eat, call the doctor – ooh, I knew you staying up to finish that deadline was going to make you sick, I just knew it!! Here, here, come over to the sofa, I'll go grab some pillows and blankets and magazines and ne, ne, do you want to listen to my new single? I'll go get it, you just sit tight– eh? Mouuu, Yuki, what do you mean you don't want to listen, I worked really hard on these songs! Please, please, please – ohhhh, you're getting all red... do you have a temperature?!"
... alright, the kid may be annoying, but even Yuki had to admit he had enough heart for the both of them. Not that anyone on this planet, or even on Mars, ever needed to hear that. Especially not Shuichi, who would probably bounce around his apartment, glowing, and hyper for the next three months just from that offhand comment alone.
Not something Yuki needed, really.
As Yuki laid down on his sofa (and the painkillers for his migraine kicked in), he felt sleep pull at his eyelids and he only managed to turn off the TV before he nodded off; not even sleep, however, could remove the faint worry lines from his face.
4:54 PM
That Evening
The blonde novelist slowly surfaced through his muddled sleep to the sound of someone talking, in a hushed, apologetic voice. He felt warm and much more comfortable than when he had fell asleep, but the quiet voice served to be a rather irking background.
As Yuki slowly sat up and the blanket that he swore was not there before, pooled like liquid in his lap, the murky mist of sleep slowly evaporated from his mind.
Voices?
Jerking around, one leg already moved to spring him off the couch if need be, Yuki's vision finally landed on one Shindou Shuichi, huddled in a corner of their apartment, facing the wall, and whispering hurriedly into the phone receiver.
"I know, I know, I'm really, really, REALLY sorry Hiro! I didn't mean to make you worry, honest! It's just, like I said, I fell asleep and just totally knocked myself out! I didn't mean to skip work either; yeah, yeah, I know we're tight on time for that single release, but I promise I'll work extra, extra hard to come up with those lyrics on time, alright? I'm really sorry! I'm – hunh? Yeah, Yuki's sound asleep. Okay, I'll see you tomorrow. Thanks for understanding, Hiro!"
Letting out a deep breath of relief, Shuichi stood up and moved to walk away from his little corner. When his gaze fell on Yuki, he froze. The blonde had since moved from his action pose and was now sitting calmly, arms crossed and eyes glaring to kill.
"Y-Yuki! You're a-awake! When I came in, you were sleeping like a log, so I thought – "
"Where. Were. You?" Yuki's eyes hardened as he saw a small smile bud on his singer's lips.
"Were you... were you worried about me, Yuki? You were, weren't you! Aww, you're so sweet, I could just gobble you up, I swear!"
"Baka!" Yuki snapped, eye twitching. Shuichi quieted immediately and had the grace to look a bit contrite. "I wasn't worried about you, but your goddamn manager and your bandmates kept bugging me all day since you didn't show your scrawny ass at work!"
Alright, that wasn't the truth, exactly... sure, K had come barging in, guns ablaze as usual, but other than that nutty American, no one else involved with Bad Luck had come to "bug him all day".
Shuichi's eyes watered slightly. "Ah, I'm sorry Yuki! I really didn't mean to forget about work; it just happened! I – "
"So I'll ask again," Yuki cut in again, eyes still hard as he leaned back and lit up a cigarette. He would admit to no one that, despite his anger, he was still relieved to a degree that his little idiot was safe inside the apartment with him. "Where the fuck were you?"
Blushing rather cutely, Shuichi's face scrunched up and he nervously played with the hem of his green t-shirt. "Umm... well..."
The novelist barked, "Spit it out!" as he blew smoke harshly from his mouth.
"SCUBA, SELF CONTAINING UNDERWATER BREATHING APPARATUS!"
Golden eyes wide, Yuki almost let the cigarette slip. "What the hell...?"
"DNA, DEOXYRIBONUCLEIC ACID!"
"Eh?"
"ODONTOPHOBIA IS THE FEAR OF TEETH!"
"Shui – "
"ELEPHANTS ARE THE ONLY MAMMALS THAT CAN'T JUMP!"
"Shuic – "
"WE THE PEOPLE OF THE UNITED STATES, IN ORDER TO FORM A MORE PERFECT UNION, ESTABLISH JUSTICE, INSURE DOMESTIC TRANQUILITY, PROVIDE FOR THE COMMON DEFENSE, PROMOTE THE GENERAL WELFARE, AND SECURE THE BLESSINGS OF LIBERTY TO OURSELVES AND OUR POSTERITY, DO ORDAIN AND ESTABLISH THIS CONSTITUTION FOR THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!"
"Okay, that's en – "
"WAKA IS A JAPANESE FORM OF POETRY THAT WAS GIVEN A DIFFERENT NAME TO DISTINGUISH THE POEMS WRITTEN IN JAPANESE TO THE POEMS WRITTEN IN CHINESE AT THE TIME!"
"Seriously, what the fuc – "
"PI IS 3.14159265 – umm, 265, uh, 5? No, 3! Ahh, 2653 – f-five? Uh... uhnn...!"
Completely lost and more than a little scared, Yuki (whose cigarette had indeed fallen from his lips after the elephant comment) could only watch with total confusion as his lover broke down into giant, wailing sobs.
Waiting for a moment (because his whole body was paralyzed from shock), Yuki slowly walked over to his lover, eyeing him as if he were some dangerous, skittish, wild animal, ready to pounce at any wrong movement. Hesitantly, he gently placed his hand on Shuichi's mop of pink hair and began to pet him soothingly. Within minutes, Shuichi's sobs had died down, though his small body was still wracked with hard shudders.
"Now what the fuck was that all about?" Yuki asked quietly, his tone gentle despite his words. "And what does it have to do with you being gone the whole night without a word?"
"I-I-I'm s-sorry! I'm sorry, Y-Yuki! S-stu-stupid pi! So s-sorry!"
Yuki sighed and gently lifted the pink haired singer's chin so that tear stained violet could clash with soft gold. "It's fine, whatever; I don't give a damn. Now, last night, you were...?"
Shuichi sniffled sadly. "Last n-night... l-last night, I went to the li-library. I didn't w-want Yuki to think I was so s-stupid like th-that fan s-said, so I wanted to read s-some books and impress him! B-but, by the time I got there, it w-was already closed, so I went to a b-book store and bought a whole bunch of books that l-looked really wordy. Th-then, I rented a hotel room so I could pr-practice, but I st-stayed up too late and fell asl-asleep and didn't w-wake up until late in the a-afternoon."
Well, shit. Yuki was perhaps as stupefied as earlier, but without the mass amounts of confusion. He hadn't ever thought that his lover cared about his intelligence; he never seemed to care when Yuki complained about how loud he was, or how messy he was. Did those stupid letters really affect Shuichi that much?
Sighing, Yuki stood up abruptly and motioned for the pink haired singer to follow him into his office. Shuichi hesitated on the floor for a moment, but Yuki easily grabbed his hand gently and pulled him to his feet. Despite the horrifying humiliation he was going to face within the next few minutes, Yuki still let his eyes warm to let his baka know that nothing bad was going to happen.
"I have something to show you, brat," he said gruffly, tugging his lover to the door. "I responded to those letters – "
"Waah! You did?! Yuki, how could you, after all those mean things they said about me and – !"
"Quiet, Shuichi, it's not like you're thinking," Yuki unsurely cut in, his own embarrassment shining through.
"Y-yuki?"
"I..." Yuki paused a bit, finding the words extremely difficult to spit out, "I guess I decided... after you left, that I don't like anyone making you cry... not even me."
Wide, trusting violet eyes, still glazed over and bubbling with tears. "Oh, Yuki..."
This wasn't Shuichi's traditional loud, headache-inducing shouts that irritated him to no end. This wasn't Shuichi's big glomp and tackle strategy, in which he blubbered and cried messily all over Yuki's nice shirts. This was a sincere, awe-inspired whisper filled with love and gentleness, and as sick as Yuki would probably find all of this later, his heart melted.
A small smile quirked at his lips; Shuichi was only able to get a quick glimpse of one upturned corner of Yuki's mouth before it left, but it was enough. Feeling so warm and touched, Shuichi squeezed Yuki's hand that still held his own and moved to wipe the tears jerkily off his face.
"Here, look," Yuki finally said after a few moments of silence as he drew up his letter on his laptop. Beginning to feel the embarrassment of doing something, heaven forbid, nice, he smoothly turned his head to gaze coolly at the wall (though secretly watching his pink haired baka from the corner of his eye).
Dear a worried loyal fan,
I'll be as blunt as I can, for the sake of time and brevity:
Kindly fuck off.
If you really thought that I would just let Shindou Shuichi waltz into my life to take advantage of my apartment, my good looks, my reputation, and my writing skills, then you must think I'm a brain-dead pushover or something. As you can imagine, I'm not exactly flattered.
So please, stay out of my affairs, because, in reality, you have no idea what you're talking about. Plus, you made the pink baka cry, so let's hope we don't meet in an empty alleyway, hmm?
Yuki Eiri
P.S. What's this shit about me acting nicer to my fans because of Shuichi? If I was changing into a "warmer person" or such, why should I share that part of my life with fans who only want to bug me and invade my personal space? Please stop coming up with these romantic theories – they're making me gag.
Although not the fastest reader around, Yuki felt that Shuichi took way longer reading his letter than necessary (which was partially true, considering the singer had actually read it over thrice, not believing what he saw the first time, then feeling so giddy and happy the second time that he had to read it again). Still keeping his eyes firmly averted to the wall, he began to absentmindedly pat down his pockets for any sign of a cigarette, feeling vaguely annoyed when he realized he had left them in the other room.
Words, thoughts, feelings all swelled up inside Shuichi's chest, bumping around to make themselves heard. He finally burst.
"YUUUUUUUKKKKKIIIIIIIIIIIII! You did this for me?! You really sent it and everything? I-I can't believe it! I knew I had the most sensitive, handsome-est, more wonderful guy ever! Just wait until I tell Hiro; he thinks you're a real piece of work in need of an attitude adjustment, but he'll really be eating his words now, don't you think? This is so --!"
It was amazing how the brat had managed to praise the living daylights out of him and take a stab at his self-esteem in one fell swoop. Ah, well, it was typical Shuichi.
"You really wanna thank me? Then you can close that trap of yours and stop killing my hearing." Yuki, luckily, at this point, had done some searching in some nearby desk drawers and found a half-opened pack of his addiction.
"Oh, oh, can I print this out and show it to everyone?!"
"No. You can shut up, though."
"What if I just sent in an email? Everyone must know how you valiantly came to my rescue!"
"Valiantly came to your – what? Shit, if I had known this is what I was going to get for doing you a favor, I would've just taken a nap instead. Now can you–"
"Yes, yes, shut up and stop hurting your ears. Oh, but Yuki, you are so wonderful, you know that?"
"Abso-fucking-lutely fantastic."
"So kind and thoughtful and beautiful inside and out! And–"
"Please stop accusing me of such behavior; I kick little lost puppies in the street, I swear."
Yuki knew this would happen. Of course it would! Do the idiot one small favor to show that he may, possibly, sort of cared and now he would be expecting the world. And knowing Shuichi, he would probably start asking for love letters or a character in a novel based on him or moonlit dinners or watching the sunset on the beach. Things Yuki wouldn't, couldn't give.
At least not right now.
... but still... if it was between showing a little affection, getting it blown way out of proportion, yet with Shuichi staying with him, or showing no affection at all and possibly losing his pink little fruit-head in the long-run...
Well, even Yuki could see which one was the obvious choice.
... he just wished the headaches didn't hurt like such a bitch.
.owari.
Hello there, this is a pretty long oneshot for me, so I'm actually rather impressed with myself for the time being (this probably won't last long, though, after I reread it later on). I hope you enjoyed (or at least read it the whole way through)!
Please send me a review telling what you liked, what you didn't like... the works, I'm sure you understand.
Shuichi is naturally loud and needy when it comes to Eiri, so even though a soft, sweet moment between the two would probably make your hearts melt more, I felt him being his normal hyper self was more fitting. I hope they were in character, at least for the most part of the story...
I had been writing this baby for a few weeks at the very least, in little bits and pieces, so it's a great feeling to finally be done and to post it!
If you want to discuss, argue, or point something out to me, you can either review, send me a private message, or you can email me at kagemagicyahoo. Please do; I love feedback and such!
Incessant Insanity
(1.17.08) I was rereading this and a few, very small errors just kicked my OCD into full throttle. Thank you all who read and reviewed; you have no idea how much it means to me!