From: SteveRogers541
To: tony
Subject: Computer Trouble

Dear Tony,

I haven't gotten to see you today. I hope your business in Hong Kong is going well. I thought I would try this email business to talk to you. This morning, I was jogging and I ran into Clint. I suspect that SHIELD has him watching over me. He asked me to give you his regards.

I want to thank you again for the training room you set up for those of us you are hosting in your tower. It is a very generous gift and I cannot thank you enough. I will pay you back for the punching bag I broke when you get back. Maybe if your feeling up to it you could join the team next week for roller skating. When I asked Clint what was something we could all do in the city, he assured me this is what "all the cool kids were doing."

I did have a question for you. I included the message below. I decided to visit the site and I filled out all the information that they asked. I know you told me not to give out my password to anything but they needed it so that they could send me a message verifying my identity. However, this past evening I've received over thirty emails from them. I wasn't sure if this was a mistake. I also provided them with my credit card information just so that they could verify it was my money. I had some reservations for I feel it is likely that they made a mistake.

Sincerely,
Steve Rogers

-Original Message-

From: jab1 .net
To: SteveRogers541
Subject: Unclaimed Funds!

It has come to our attention that you may be entitled to an
undisclosed amount of unclaimed funds.

If so, these funds are currently reserved in your name and waiting
or you to claim.

Please enter your name at the unclaimed money search engine
located at our site.
Click Here

Notification Date: 10/15/12 to 11/15/12

Unclaimed Funds Department
Found


From: tony
To: SteveRogers541
Subject: Re: Computer Trouble

STEVE. NO. BAD. We do not accept candy from strangers nor do we give out our passwords and CREDIT CARD INFORMAITION to spammers. I am finding out who was behind this and fucking up their lives. You need to call your bank and change your password. I will make sure nothing happens but better safe than sorry and you need to learn.

I will find us something to do. We are not going roller skating. That fell out of fashion decades ago. Don't believe Clint. He is a lying liar who lies.

Also, why aren't you using the account I set up for you?

-Stark


From: SteveRogers541
To: tony
Subject: Computer Trouble

Dear Tony,

I don't understand. This email clearly stated that they had some of my money in reserves. I understand the concept of spam. You don't have to be condescending. These nice people are just trying to be helpful. It would be appreciated if you would use a little less colorful language as well. Some of the team has voiced complaints.

I would also appreciate if you would at least try to work with someone other than Bruce. We need to be able to function as a team.

Sincerely,
Steve Rogers


From: tony
To: SteveRogers541
Subject: Re: Computer Trouble

Alright. I wrote a better spam filter for you since apparently we're not going to acknowledge the fact that people lie. The internet is full of lies. I patched it into your gmail account since apparently you didn't change your password. I have found the person responsible so there shouldn't be any trouble with people reading Captain America's personal emails. They are really very sorry and will be sending you a care package in the mail. Expect it. Tell me if it doesn't get there within 2 days so that I can have some more words with our little spammer.

I believe I have an idea for who is the one who doesn't like my language and it isn't the only woman on the team. I have a feeling if I spoke Russian even I would be blushing at that girls language. As it is my language will stay as fucking colorful as I fucking want it to be.

Also, Bruce is awesome.

-Stark


From: SteveRogers541
To: tony
Subject: Re: Re: Computer Trouble

Dear Tony,

I noticed you didn't say anything about working with any other members of the Avengers.

Sincerely,
Steve Rogers


From: tony
To: SteveRogers541
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Computer Trouble

Nope.