Disclaimer: I do not own KOF. SNK does and there is probably no way I can unless SNK goes broke again and then I could probably buy the rights to SNK.
So what is the Sie Kensou Show? It's a sketch comedy making fun of characters from the King of Fighters series and a few other SNK games and other stuff. They're crack stories, meaning they're not going to make sense or be in canon. That means some characters are going to do and say things that they normally don't do. So leave me the hell alone. Now, on to the show.
"Ladies and Gentlemen" proclaimed Chin Gentsai, who managed to be one of the shows announcers. "I would like to present to you our host, the man who's been having wardrobe malfunctions long before Janet Jackson showed the world her tit. One of my best pupils and Athena's number one fanboy, Sie Kensou."
The crowd cheers as a white Rolls Royce Phantom drives onto the stage. A chauffeur comes out and opens the back door, allowing Kensou to step out. The crowd cheers even louder as he steps to the microphone.
"Hello folks welcome to the Sie Kensou Show." spoke Kensou as he was playing with the microphone. "Did he just call me a fanboy, he knows I'm her friend. His old ass is just mad because he's probably going to die soon. Anyway how ya'll doing. If you don't know, the Sie Kensou Show is where we make fun of a bunch of stuff including my fellow fighters like Terry Bogard." The screen above Kensou shows Terry on a toilet with his pants down trying to block the camera.
"Mai" (shows her popping out of a bathtub, surprising Andy as he was washing up)
"Joe" (shows a picture of him grabbing Lilly Kane's ass in front of Billy)
"King" (shows a picture of her beating up a health inspector)
"Kyo" (Shows four pictures of him. One is a current pic, one is a picture of him ten years from now, one twenty years, and one as an old man. All of them show him in school as a student.)
"Iori"(shows him slashing Barney to death)
"Kim"(shows him arresting Osama Bin Laden)
"Bao" (shows him wearing a dress)
"Master Chin" (shows him passed out and drunk in a garbage dumpster)
"Athena" (shows her smacking a one of her fans)
"And of course, me" (shows him being fed and massaged by three beautiful women)
"Now lets get it cracking." Said Kensou as he hopped back in the Rolls Royce.
(the sound of tv static)
"Does the lack of boost in Full Throttle make you feel half assed? Do you think Red Bull is a bunch of red bullshit?" Asked a man in a room holding a drink can. "Then we have the energy drink for you, Yamazaki's drink. Made from the man himself, it is filled with supercharged ingredients, such as alcohol, steroids, horse tranquilizers, roofies, ecstasy, and Mountain Dew. This drink will get you amped up.
Shingo comes and takes a sip. Within a few seconds he starts bouncing around, punching holes through the wall, falling around and starts foaming at the mouth.
"YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" screamed a drugged up Shingo.
A warning comes onto the screen saying, "This drink may cause nausea, diarrhea, cancer, foaming of the mouth, shrunken genitalia, psychotic behavior, urinary problems, and the habit of sticking your hand in your pocket. Please do not drink if you have Orochi blood in your system."
"Orochi blood?" asked the man. "Wait, doesn't Yamazaki have Orochi……."
Just then Yamazaki tore through a wall, killing a few producers on the way and coming toward the man.
(tv static)
"Hey with all this talk of sending illegal immigrants, are you worried they're going to send you back to Mexico, Ramon?" asked Kensou.
"Well I don't have much to worry about since I 'VE ALREADY BEEN LIVING THERE!" gradually yelled Ramon.
"Hey don't get mad at me because they sent you back."
Ramon swiftly gave him a punch to the face.
(tv static)
As Ryo and Yuri was backing out their car, they ran over a strange bump. Yuri looked out her window to realize something.
"I think we just ran over Mr. Todoh" informed Yuri.
Ryo quickly threw the car in drive and reverse, repeatedly running over Todoh.
"Yep we sure did." said Ryo with a smirk on his face. As the car started backing out again, Yuri pressed her brothers foot on the pedal, hurling the car backwards.
"Whoa, we just ran over Malin. We've just killed two birds with one stone." commented Ryo.
"Or one car." joked Yuri, as the Sakazaki siblings started laughing.
(tv static)
"Wow look at all the fan mail I get." Said Mai as she had just dumped a bag full of mail, with Terry, Andy and Joe looked on. " I get plenty of mail from men, but there's only one man I'll answer." said Mai as she seductively rubbed up on Andy.
"Why won't this bitch leave me alone?" mumbled Andy under his breathe.
"What did you say?" asked Mai.
"I said I want to give Mary's dog a bone" answered Andy.
"Mai, one man sent you a gift," informed Terry.
"Oh good" said my as she ripped opened the package. When she picked up the item, a bit of disgust hit her face.
"Eww. They're edible panties."
"Yeah, gives new meaning to the phrase "Eating Out." quipped Joe. Everyone one in the room looked at Joe with disgust.
(tv static)
"Eh this yo boy T.I. telling you Kensou will be right back after these commercials." Said the rapper.
Please go easy on me. I typed this kind of fast, and was tired so there are probably lots of mistakes in it. Please review.