A/N: Don't ask where this came from. Me and Zombie Kitty were talking about Mr Flibble and me being the hopeless romantic I am wondered if Mr Flibble ever got lonely…needless to say the creative equivalent of chaos ensued! It's weird...but kinda sweet. Reviews (even bad ones) appreciated.
Enjoy…if you can stand it!
Sunny
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Mr Flibble: evil, murderous, sadistic, half crazed lunatic puppet. The infamous heathen sown together by the Devil himself, forged from the fake fur of the damned. Stuffed with the highly flammable stuffing of Satan…was lonely.
He gave a dejected sigh and held his head in his furry little flippers.
Sure, it was good fun causing pandemonium about the universe, controlling holograms, zapping humans, melting random objects that had the misfortune to be in his way…but he'd long grown weary of it.
The thing was, when you're a homicidal, evil, mind controlling, overly violent furry penguin puppet…you didn't exactly have many friends.
In fact you had none.
You were a social outcast, a freak…a cute freak at that…but still unapproachable by others.
Most just ran off screaming, some fainted then woke up and ran off screaming but on the whole they avoided him… with the exception of one idiot had bent down, tickled the evil puppet under the chin saying 'awww what a cute littleAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH…IT'S ON MY FACE, NO, NO AAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH- " Flibble had leapt up and proceeded to chew his nose off. Serves his right for sticking it where it wasn't wanted.
The thought of that random act of unnecessarily gruesome violence wasn't enough to bring a smile to Flibbe's beak.
He was still thoroughly down in the dumps.
'Just once' he thought solemnly 'just once, I'd like someone to not run off screaming. Yes, on the outside I may look cold, heartless, malicious and untrustworthy…but deep down I'm sweet, loveable, sensitive, caring, a good lover...and I'm 80 per cent polyester!'
He heaved another sigh before hopping off the rock he'd been sat on. 'I suppose I'd better go find some humans to control and wreak havoc with… ' He thought, waddling across the face of the moon towards the bustling metropolis.
He thought briefly of putting a personal ad in the paper:
Lonely Penguin seeks equally lonely female penguin (or similar species). Enjoys moonlit dining, gory horror films, mind control, telekinesis and salsa dancing. WLTM lady penguin that enjoys similar things. GSOH and being evil a must but isn't picky. No chickens or pigeons need apply.
That was what Flibble wanted, a lady friend.
Someone he could cuddle up to on cold nights, someone who could kiss away the pain, someone who could fulfil his sexual desires…possible by dressing up.
'Yes' said Mr Flibble, 'that's what I need…a woman!If I have acompanion, I will be lonely no more!' He performed a high-pitched evil giggle, rubbing his flippers together in glee.
A dumb looking human stumbled into sight. A perfect candidate to be taken over, too drunk to resist.
'But first, to business'.
The penguin's eyes glowed red and he locked onto the drunken mess with his telekinesis beam to hold him steady, just as he was about to fly onto the human's hand he noted the second beam.
That wasn't his.
He followed the pink beam back to its owner and felt his little heart leap about his chest.
It was another penguin. She was beautiful, silky black fake fur, she wore a pink bow on top of her head, and long curly eyelashes framed her crimson eyes.
Flibble bet she was 90 per cent polyester at least!
She lowered her own gaze as she spotted him and gave a shy wave. Mr Flibble quickly waddled over.
"Hello" he said,
"Hello" she replied,
"Mr Flibble" said everyone's favourite puppet, extending his flipper
"Ms Flibbina" she replied, shaking his flipper, smiling all the while.
A moment of silence occurred, the furry pair just stood and smiled at each other, marvelling in how they might have found someone to love.
Suddenly, unable to contain her lust any longer, Flibbina leapt on top of Flibble andsmothered him in penguin kisses.
Needless to say, he didn't resist.
When the pair finally broke apart, they gazed deep into each other's eyes. Mr Flibble had to know though, would he and Flibbina get on? Yes, she was beautiful, sexy and a fantastic kisser…but what was she like as a penguin.
"Tell me" he said, "do you like hurting humans?"
"Yes"
'Okay' he thought 'one thing we have in common' "What about gory horror movies?" he asked
"I love gory horror movies…the more blood the better!" giggled Flibbina
Yet another thing the pair had in common, this would mean there would be no arguing when it came to choosing videos.
Flibble decided to try just one more question.
The answer to this one could make or break their relationship
"What about…salsa dancing!"
"I adore salsa dancing! I can happily dance the night away!"
"I love you!" Flibble declared, wrapping his flippers round Flibbina's waist and holding her close.
"I love you too!" she cooed.
Giggling, the pair ran into a nearby shrub.
It must have looked pretty weird to passers by, as the shrub shook violent from side to side, high pitched squealing coming from deep within its leaves.
The pair emerged several days later, but this time they were not alone.
3 tiny baby penguin puppets toddled behind Mr Flibble.
His and Flibbina's children. Pintsize puppets of pure evil! They were to follow in their parent's footsteps and terrorize humans!
There was Flibble Jr, the girl Flibby-Lou and the youngest, Pingu.
Mr Flibble looked at his family in content, he was one happy penguin!
"Come children," he said, holding onto his Flibbina's flipper as he waddled towards a busy town "Together, we will create destruction and havoc, we will terrify humans, take control of their weak and worthless bodies and WE WILL RULE THE UNIVERSE!" he cackled evilly, til he noticed he children weren't joining in "Children-" he prompted
Flibble Jr, Flibby-Lou and Pingu threw their heads back and laughed in true evil villain style.
"Good" said Mr Flibble "Now…lets go!"
And the Flibble family went forth and created mayhem across the galaxies.
The End
Or is it?
No wait it is…sorry
The End (again)