Chapter 1

"Why isn't anything working? The hair won't stick to the head, which makes no sense because the hairspray is sticking to the hand, and so the hand is sticking to the bottle which is spraying wherever it wants—"

"Ok hun, I know talking a mile a minute is our thing but you're reaching a new level. Like we're normally Speedy Gonzales and your just reached Roadrunner and Wile E Coyote."

"How could I reach Roadrunner and Wile E Coyote? Wile E Coyote is stupid and slow, whereas the Roadrunner is clever and fast, therefore if I'm both the Coyote and Runner, I would cancel myself out, resulting in nothing. Are you saying I'm nothing, mother? I can't believe you would say such a thing on my wedding day…"

"Why don't you just go back to complaining about your hair? Anything is better than this!"

"Fine. How much time until the ceremony?"

"Two to five hours."

"Wow. A three hour range. You know, there's something called a clock. It can be pretty useful from time to time."

"Oh, my sweet, naive, little Rory child. You are the bride. The ceremony waits for you. The party doesn't start 'til you walk in."

"So you think I should let everyone wait for three hours simply because we are to lazy to look at a clock?"

"Of course darling. You are like Princess Diana. The Queen Elizabeth of the evening. You are tonight's Miss Piggy!"

"You do realize you just compared the Queen of England to a muppet, right?

"They have the same hair and lipstick."

"You're right— I truly am a naive, little Rory child."

"But you're my little naive, little, Rory ch—"

"Ok that's just getting annoying now."

"Agreed…. Want some pizza?"

"Mom. We have and hour until we have to be at the Dragonfly for the wedding. I need to get dressed. And no eating pizza! Sookie is going to have cooked way to much food and you must fulfill your responsibility to eat all of the leftovers!"

"What a naive, little, Ro—"

"Mom!"

"Pre-eating expands your stomach so there's more room when you get the food you're supposed to be eating. Henceforth, my stomach will expand and more food can be eaten. Therefore."

"Therefore?"

"I'm wise beyond my years."

"Ah."

Finally herding her mother out of her bedroom, Rory closed the door and turned to her wardrobe. It had been cleared out except for a long, white gown. Pulling it over her head, Rory caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She felt pretty. Not like a little girl playing dress up, as she had expected, but she felt comfortable and beautiful. The sleeves, hanging off the sides of her arms simply for decoration, reminded her of the golden dress from Beauty and the Beast. This was what originally made her try the dress on; Belle was Rory's favorite princess, after all.