Evangelion: Earthbound Angels

Original Neo Genesis Evangelion Fanfiction by

Angel Diver

Shinji Ikari awoke to the sound or rushing water. It was a faint sound, like a midsummer's breeze blowing through the rushes of a meadow. He rose, looking at his clock, his eyes falling upon the neon blue phosphorescence of his clock.

Five o'clock a.m.

"It's so early," he moaned. He turned over onto his side in his blanket, his eyes still open. He stared. Looked at the calendar. October 1st. It had been exactly one year from today that Rei Ayanami had vanished.

Shinji wandered into the kitchen and poured himself a bowl of cereal. He sat down at the kitchen table and stared outside the glass doors to the balcony. It was raining heavily. It reminded him of that day.

"I will return, Shinji," Rei had said.

"But…but do you really have to go?" pleaded Shinji.

Rei's mouth twitched into what might have been recognizably a smile. "Yes. I was made for a higher purpose. I understand now what that is. I cannot hide from my destiny."

"You're destiny?"

"Yes, Shinji. My destiny."

Shinji's eyes darted back and forth from Rei to the two muscular men in black suits on either side of her.

"Rei, I'm…I'm not entirely sure this is safe."

"Trust your heart," Rei said, then climbed inside the limousine. The rain chilled Shinji to the bone as he watched the girl he had so desired to share his life with disappear.

What had she meant by that? Shinji ruminated. I cannot hide from my destiny? What was Rei's destiny? Shinji didn't care if she had been a scientific experiment, the personal clone of his insane father. Rei was more than a duplicated husk, some lifelike doll come off the assembly line. She was a living, breathing person, and she was capable, or so he had thought, of loving. And being loved. However, he'd never truly had the chance to find out. After the great fiasco that had ravaged the better part of Tokyo 3, NERV had been all but decommissioned and his father, Gendo Ikari, had summoned Rei to an undisclosed location on an assignment that was so elite not even former Vice Commander of NERV, Kouzou Fuyutski was privy to. One year ago today Rei had vanished and for the first time in nearly twelve months, the dreams had started again.

Shinji heard the water stop. Someone was showering. Asuka most likely; Misato was never awake this early. The former pilot of Unit-01 stared down into his cereal bowl. He wasn't especially hungry. He wasn't really ever hungry.

A moment later, the bathroom door burst open and a shroud of steam billowed out. A moment later, Asuka emerged, wearing a towel like a toga. She crossed the room without as much as a word. Shinji followed her with his eyes.

Now that they didn't pilot EVAs anymore, Asuka had become--if it was at all possible--even more of an irritable, depressed person than before. With nothing to constantly compete at Shinji in or to keep her mind occupied, she always had a brooding halo of agitation about her. For the most part, Shinji dreaded her company.

At length, Asuka emerged in a pair of cut off jeans Shinji swore he'd seen Misato wear before as well as a t-shirt with a message printed across the chest that read: "Quit starin', asshole!"

She went into the kitchen as Shinji had done, then came to the table a moment later with two slices of cold pizza and a glass of milk. Ikari gawked. It wasn't exactly the breakfast of champions. Asuka caught him staring in mid-chew.

"What the hell are you staring at, Third Child?" she said after a loud swallow.

Shinji paled, staring down into his cereal.

"N-nothing…"

The two ate across from each other in silence for several minutes during which time many things crossed his mind. For the last few weeks, Asuka had been out of the house late of night, not returning until early morning. She had denied her late night exploits, naturally, and Misato always seemed either too preoccupied or too buzzed to take notice. In some respects, Shinji had assumed sort of a motherly position in the household, and had begun to worry about the state of Asuka's health.

He cared for the German girl. They'd been through a lot together, through the thick and thin of Angel attacks, the death of a comrade, the destruction of their organization. They'd seen the reformation of the world side by side. Through all of this, Asuka had remained a loudmouth, a rebellious teen, competitive and goal oriented. After Eva, this had significantly changed.

For the most part, Asuka was much quieter, much more introverted. She kept to herself, often disappearing for days at a time to return home with an ashen, spent complexion. Shinji knew that expression well--the look of the complete abandonment of hope.

"Asuka…?" he mumbled. "What…what is it you do…every night? When you sneak out after dark?"

The redhead blinked.


"What?" Asuka feigned surprise.

"Well…you're gone for so long…at unusual hours…I thought…" Shinji reddened. "I thought something might be wrong."

"Nothings wrong, you dolt!" berated the German. "Stay out of my business you lonely little creep! Maybe if you got a girlfriend or something you wouldn't be so nosey! Yeesh!"

Shinji decided it was best to leave it at that. If the secrets behind Asuka's midnight mayhem were something the girl wanted to remain clandestine, there was nothing Shinji could say that would change her mind. Or so he thought…

"I…I'm sorry Shinji."

At first, the Third Child hadn't been sure he'd heard it. The words were as soft as flower petals scraping across stone. He looked up to see an anguished look upon Asuka's face. Before he could say anything, the girl leapt up from the table and darted out of the room. She slammed the door to her bedroom and locked it. Shinji twitched.

"A-Asuka?"

He didn't know exactly if it was something he had said that had provoked Asuka's sudden outburst or whether she had been the victim of a sudden, impromptu mood swing. He rose to his feet and walked over to Asuka's bedroom door. Upon the white board had been written a message:

Kommen Sie herein und sterben Sie!

Enter and Die!

Penpen waddled out from the laundry room and gazed sleepily up at Shinji. The Third Child raised his hand to knock upon Asuka's door but stopped when he heard muffled sobs. He blinked, surprised.

"A…Asuka…"

"What are you two doing outside Asuka's room?" mused the familiar voice of Misato.

Shinji turned. Misato slouched in the doorway to her bedroom. Her hair was tangled and messy, one of her cheeks crimson and lined from having slept heavily upon it. She was wearing a pair of Shinji's boxing shorts and a NERV t-shirt. Shinji took note of her attire.

"M-Misato…?" he stammered. "Are those…my--"

"Were you spying on Asuka again, Shinji?" Misato said, her voice thick with post drunken delirium.

"I…no! Of course not!" Shinji protested.

Misato smirked from ear to ear. "I know about your…fetish, Shinji."

Shinji blushed uncharted shades of crimson. "F-fetish? I don't know what you're talking about, Misato!"

Penpen took two steps away from Shinji and cast him a quizzical glance.

"I've seen you watching her…" Misato cooed. "Late at night. Early in the morning. When she comes out of the shower. You even wore one of her t-shirts to school one day."

"By accident!" Shinji protested.

Penpen shot the Third Child a 'yeah right' look.

"Anyway, I don't spy on her!" cried Shinji in his own defense. "I…I worry about her…"

"You like her," Misato mumbled, going into the kitchen.

Shinji knew Misato was just teasing him. He cared a great deal for Asuka but not once had he considered ever seeking to further his relationship with her than it was currently. Obviously, she'd never in one million years be interested in him. Pursuing the dream of Asuka was like fools good--it was a glimmering dream, but something that would inevitably result in disappointment.

Walking away, Shinji began to get ready for work.

***

Asuka wept for a long time. Tears poured out of her like the river that endures the frost and the ice in winter. She buried her head in her pillow and cried. Strange emotions tore at her heart.

It had been this way for a while. About two months. When Rei had still been around, Asuka had witnessed the unmistakable love Shinji felt for the blue haired girl. His heart burned with like a log upon a roaring fire, searing with passion that he could neither explain nor control. When he was around Rei, he was able to roll all of the darkness around him into one million suns. And Asuka had laughed at this… believing it to be puerile, a futile, useless love.

But it was a beautiful love.

It was something Asuka did not have. The German wept more. Asuka knew she could have any man she wanted. She was attractive and could be winningly charming if she wanted to, but she didn't just want muscular shoulders, a tight abdomen and a tight back. She wanted a boy's heart. She wanted what she did not and could not have.

Did she want Shinji Ikari? No way! Ridiculous. Impossible. Who could like that twitchy, little runt?

After Asuka stopped sobbing, she rose upon her bed and retrieved a small brass key from under her mattress. She unlocked the bottom drawer of her desk. From within the darkness within she procured a framed photograph. Within the frame was a picture of the time just after the destruction of NERV and the death of Kaoru when he had sat with Asuka upon that grassy knoll watching the glittering sunset over the endless expanse of the ocean. That geeky kid with the glasses had taken the shot. She'd had to pay another girl to get the photo from him--she could never risk exposing her softer side to anyone. She held the photograph to her chest, then replaced it in the desk.

Could Asuka ever have the devotion of the heart that Shinji had shown for Rei? Despite all of the armor she wore to deflect the cruel darkness of the world, inside she was full of pain and heartache. She wanted so desperately to be loved so deeply that nothing else mattered. The way Shinji loved.

It was a dream that would remain locked away. At least for now.

-FIN-

End of part I.