Ok, this is my first fanfic ever so don't blame me if it is bad. I like what Art is a Bang XD did with Hidan's swearing so i'm copying her, i suppose i should change the theme for cussing every so chapter. Here it goes...

I do NOT own Naruto... i think... Nah, i'm sure...

An Akatsuki Garage Sale

Remains-of-a-Garage Ripped-Offed Sale

The sky opened, the rain poured down, pounding on to the earth thunder rumbled in the distance. It seemed that the sky too was mourning the death of a certain puppeteer. There was a soft splat of dripping tears. A sleeve wiped away the remaining droplets that glistened in the baby-blue eyes. There was no use crying over the broken, lifeless body lying on the floor, there was nothing the blonde could do to change that. But still the bomb artist could not help but whisper the name of the wooden body, "Danna... Sasori no Danna...un," The ruined body did not respond. The life of the puppeteer had been drained from him. Nothing could change that, it was time leave the past and the return to the Akatsuki headquarters; they were in need of a new member.

The S-classed criminals sat themselves in the living room of the hideout; it was time for another meeting. The room was silent except for the slow dripping of the rain outside. At last the hyperactive Tobi, the newest member of the Akatsuki and replacement for the redhead puppeteer, calmed down, the leader of the group spoke.

"As all of us are aware, one of our former members, Sasori has fallen in battle fighting his hag of a grandmother and the pink haired bitch. We also have a new member to replace him," Leader gestured to the masked man waving energetically at the rest of the group. The leader continued to ramble on about Sasori's death, Tobi's admittance to the organization and most of all their plan on ruling the world. No one in particular listened to Pein's speech, their thoughts were elsewhere.

A voice broke through the rambling. "Can we actually do something to remember Sasori-Danna than ramble on about his death, un?" A certain blonde we know as Deidara questioned.

"Deaths are part of a ninja's life and job, we are all just tools to be used until we are killed are of no used anymore..." came the blunt voice of Itachi, "But I don't really mind if we did something different once in a while..." he continued.

Kisame looked a little confused, "Did Itachi-san argue with himself just then?" He whispered his question to the rest of the Akatsuki, but the ninjas ignored the comment or choose not to respond. Kisame shivered at the thought of Itachi-san turning into the likes of Zetzu, having a cannible for a partner was not the best idea for a guy who is half fish, but come to think about it having a cannible for a partner was kind of freaky even for someone who isn't half fish.

"Hmmm... that's not such a bad idea coming from a blonde. We could turn it to one of those days like Valentine's Day that is mainly commercialized and we could sell the old puppets he left. It would be a good opportunity to make some good money." Guess who said that, wait... I'll give you to the count of ten. One... two... three... four... stuff counting to ten, it was Kakuzu.

"Shut your cake mouth up, there is no chocolate thing as good money when it comes to you. The candy money that you are going to make selling things that didn't own is bad... B...A...D... Get it you ca..."

"Wait... did Kakuzu just say that I was dumb, un?" came the voice of the blonde Deidara, cutting the cake of Hidan's swearing frenzy.

"No," Kakuzu answered back, "I implied that you were dumb because you are blonde and blondes are dumb. And if Hidan has problem with my 'bad money' then we shall make the day into a garage sale and we can sell losers our crap."

"But we don't have a garage," Tobi pointed out. That was true; Deidara had blown up the garage that was once there some few New Year's Day ago to hold a large New Year's Fireworks. He had chosen the particular spot due to the fact that the Akatsuki didn't have a car so there was no point in having a garage.

"Well, we could have it on the front lawn...," put in Konan helpfully. The Akatsuki also didn't really have a front lawn... why? Well you'll find that out later.

"No... No, we should still have it in the remains of the garage in which I blew up. That way all our customers can admire my work of art. If Sasori was still alive the two artists would have an argument on what form of art is truly art, but fortunately he is not, well it isn't very fortunate that he died but it would save me from typing up an art argument.

-Flash Back-

Very drunk Akatsuki holding bottles of beer, most half-emptied in their hand, stood surrounded with many more drained bottles lying on the front lawn of the Akatsuki hideout. To tell the truth the bottles on the floor were once half- emptied too, but they now were littered over the floor like those in the hands of the Akatsuki right now are destined for. The remains of the alcohol were spilled over the ill-fated grass. The Akatsuki looked up into the night sky and began to count in loud drunken voices. Ten... nine... eight... seven... six... five... four... three... two... one...Katsu! KABOOM!! "HAPPY NEW YEAR PEOPLEZ!!" the crazy missing-nins called out for the whole wide world to hear.

The once dark sky, set off into an explosion of bright vivid colour, even the neighbours who hated the Akatsuki so much, although I can't think of anyone who would hate the Akatsuki other than the Konaha brats, couldn't help but let escape a gasp as the wonderful 'art' lit up the sky. But what the neighbours or any of the Akatsuki did not see was the broken garage lying underneath the colourful arrangement.

The next day, the results of last night revealed itself: Deidara had chosen the garage to be his unlucky victim. The remains of the helpless and innocent object lay scattered on the floor, like the beer bottles on the lawn, or would you rather say what was left of the lawn. The spilt beer had obviously had a bad effect on the grass. Over the night the green had turned to a sickly pale milky-white, much like the colour of the Hyuuga eyes.

"NOOOOOO!!" came the hideous shrieking of three voices in unison. The rest of the Akatsuki turned around to find Zetzu and Kakuzu kneeling on the ground starring freakily at the grass and garage respectively; however the Akatsuki couldn't find the owner of the third voice.

"Does anyone know how much it is going to cost to repair this damage?" howled Kakuzu.

"Ummm..." Deidara paused then continued in a quivering voice, "A lot, un?" There was moments of silence where Kakuzu stared towards the sky with both his fist clenched, the Akatsuki stared at Kakuzu in his funny devastated pose and Deidara took the chance to backed away very slowly knowing that in some way or another cost of the repairs was going to be coming out of his account.

"What about by precious grasses?" growled both sides of Zetzu. The Akatsuki diverted their attention from Kakuzu and turned to face Zetzu. Taking a moment to calculate the fact that Zetzu had agreed with himself for probably the first time in his life, they realized the third voice from before was the other side of Zetzu.

"You killed my precious grassy-pies!" snarled the white side of Zetzu

"Do you know how long it would take for them to grow back?" snapped the black side of Zetzu

The rest of the Akatsuki, who hadn't back away yet, did so. The fact that Zetzu called the dead lawn "grassy-pies' was highly disturbing.

The days grew on and no-one did anything, so from that day on, the Akatsuki no longer had a lawn or a garage, Deidara refused to pay for the garage repairs and although Zetzu set the task of replanting the front lawn, he just couldn't bring himselves to dig out the dead clumps of shrivelled up grass.

-End Flashback-

An argument broke out over where the 'garage sale' should be held, Deidara obviously chose the 'garage', and Kakuzu supported him saying the colour of the grass would put people off from buying which pissed Zetzu off big-time, sending him off to sulk in some corner in his greenhouse (Zetzu can't survive in an ordinary room so he has a greenhouse instead). Konan was the only one going for the lawn but she was in no position to lose in the pointless debate. Pein was torn between good and love, and the rest of the Akatsuki, Hidan, Itachi and Kisame didn't lollypop care as Hidan would put it. Eventually the leader who decides all, chose good over love, leaving a heart broken Konan, and decided to hold the garage sale in the 'garage ' where all garage sales are meant to be held.

"But the pudding exploded 'garage' isn't really a cream 'garage' at all; it's a remains-of-a-garage. And the 'sale' isn't going to be much of a 'sale' because muffin Kakuzu would be ripping off all the caramel customers." Hidan pointed out, putting 'air-quotation marks' on garage and sale.

"Ok, that's settled then, the remains-of-a-garage ripped off sale would start tomorrow, I'm suspending your missions for the day and you can gather whatever junk you have for the ripped-off sale." ordered Pein. The Akatsuki headed off into their rooms.

"Senpai, what is junk?" asked the pathetically dim-witted Tobi.

"Oh my go..."

"JASHIN!"

"Fine, Oh my Jashin" Deidara corrected himself, slapping his forehead protector (that is what forehead protectors are for protecting your forehead when you get so annoyed with Tobi you slap yourself on the forehead). He turned to face Tobi, "Tobi, YOU are junk!" Deidara stalked off annoyed with the new found pest.

Tobi stopped in his tracks confused by what Deidara meant. So the Akatsuki was selling him? Still unclear on what the Akatsuki was talking about Tobi headed off into his room, to gather junk or as Deidara-senpai put it, himself. The problem was Tobi had no idea how he was to do that.

Yeah, well now that you have read this fanfic you can review to tell me what a good (or bad) fanfic i wrote.