"...We have to do SOMETHING…"

"What do you propose we do?"

"I… I dunno!"

The two Ylissean royals, Chrom and Lissa, stood over the figure of a man wearing odd black and red clothing. On each of his arms was a yellow symbol of a spiked ball, and on his chest were 6 grey pill shaped objects with yellow tips. The man had dark skin, a mustache, a black cap, and an eyepatch covering his right eye. Beside him was a blood stained and battle worn claymore, as well as an old tome that looked like the pages were just shoved into the cover without being properly attached.

"...Uh… hello?" Chrom gently shook the man.

"...yer arses arse and I'm the grass man, punk… ya havin' heathen…" The man mumbled, turning over on his side.

Chrom turned towards Lissa and shrugged.

Lissa frowned. "...Chrom, we can't just leave him here. If we have to, we can have Frederick carry him."

Frederick, who had been silent thus far, was standing off to the side making sure nobody else was around. "I won't go against your order, milady, but I still firmly believe that this is some kind of trap. That odd clothing of his doesn't help."

"He's definitely a foreigner, but not from any country I've ever seen." Chrom scratched his chin. "...Lissa, don't get mad, but I don't see any other way to wake him up." Before she could reply, the blue haired lord raised his hand and slapped the strange man across the face. He shot up onto his butt, yelling.

"SOLDIER, I TOLD YE NOT TO- ...where in the hell ahm ay?" He looked over at Chrom. "Are ye the one who jus' hit me 'cross the face?"

"There's better places to take a nap than on the ground, you know." Chrom replied, standing up. "Who are you?"

"Me name is Tavish Finnegan DeGroot, but me mates jus' call me Demo. Though I think a better question 'ere is why do you all look like yer off tuh a renaissance fair?"

In the blink of an eye, Frederick was leaning over him with death in his eyes. "Are you insulting the Prince and Princess of Ylisse's choice of apparel?"

"Oh, no, I'm insulting both theirs AND yer own tin can-lookin' suit." Demo grinned. "...what's a Yl… Ylisis… Lisesis… Yilobster?"

"...Milord, permission to kill?"

"Frederick, please! The man's clearly confused and doesn't know where he's at. Let's at least take him with us to Southtown and see if we can't sort things out there." Chrom crossed his arms.

"...Yes, of course. I don't doubt your judgement one bit, milord." Frederick smiled, then shot a death glare at Demo.

"Ya can't scare me like that. I live next door to a guy twice yer size and let me tell yeh, once you see HIM angry and live to tell the tale, there isn't much left to fear."

The group of four began traveling south, with Demo not exactly sure what the hell was going on. He figured that he just got really drunk the night before and ended up miles from the RED base to wherever he was now. Demo decided to just play along with the stuff that the people around him were saying, despite how absurd it all seemed to even him.

"...I just realized! We haven't introduced ourselves yet." Chrom said, stopping. "I'm Chrom. The delicate one over there is my younger sister, Lissa."

"Hey! I am NOT delicate!"

"Yes you are. The big guy behind you is my steward, Frederick."

"Nice ta meet ya, laddies. I already told you who I was, but I 'aven't introduced ye to this beaut." He said, holding up the old claymore from before.

"Beaut isn't really the word that comes to mind when I look at that." Lissa said bluntly.

"Show Eyelander sum respect, lassie! This 'ere is a life saver, a curse, an' a bloody annoying roommate. Thankfully it's asleep right now. He talks, by the way."

Chrom and Lissa slowly look at each other with concerned expressions.

Frederick stepped past the group, looking off in the distance. "I'd hate to interrupt, but it looks as if Southtown is under attack. It must've started recently since we're only just now seeing smoke."

"Damned bandits!" Chrom grunted. "Demo, stay here while we take care of it! Something tells me you're not exactly fit for the battlefield." Chrom and the others began running toward the town.

"Oi! I may be bloody drunk, but I ain't lousy wit' a sword! ...Ah, cripe." He began to chase after them.

Southtown was populated by a nice open market, a quaint river flowing through the town, and about two dozen bandits that were spread across the town. Several buildings were on fire and smoke towered into the sky.

"Alright, everyone!" Chrom said when he, Lissa, and Frederick arrived. "It all comes down to us three, so be wary! These aren't just some kind of invisible boars! Lissa, watch your back."

"Got it!"

"Now wait for jus' a second, ya bleedin' idiots!" Demo's voice called from behind them. "Yer forgettin' someone!"

Chrom frowned. "I told you to stay where you were!"

"Ay, I heard ye. Jus' cause ya told me though doesn't mean I hafta. I know I look like a looney, but cut a cyclops sum slack! Trust me, I know what ahm doin'."

"...Whatever you want. Alright, let's go!" Chrom began to head towards some bandits, but Demo grabbed his arm.

"We are not just chargin' in like some idiots! We need a plan! Big guy on horse, you go around that stand and take care of those two over there. One-Sleeve an' I are gonna go this way an' kick these guys arses. Lassie, you stay behind Horse Guy! We're gonna meet up at that bridge over there, and take care of that shirtless guy who looks like he's controllin' this 'ere operation!"

"We have names you know!" Lissa frowned.

"An' I forgot 'em! Now go!" Demo ran off, and Chrom followed behind him.

Demo and Chrom engaged an enemy together, but before Chrom could do any damage, Demo had charged up to him and sliced his head clean off. "Dear Naga!" The prince exclaimed at the violent sight. Demo turned around, his single eye faintly glowing green now.

"Wot? Can't handle a bit o' blood, eh?" He grinned madly. "I said this 'ere sword is cursed. It loves headtakin'."

"I've found a monster." Chrom mumbled to himself.

Soon, they had routed the enemy and rescued the village.

"Ay, we did good! High five, anybody?" Demo raised his hand. The other three in the group stared at him. "...wot? Is it me eye?"

"Yes. Yes it is." Lissa said, her face full of shock. "It's glowing."

"Oh. Eyelander! Could ye stop wit' the unusual effect? It's scarin' me new mates!" Soon after he said that, the green flame disappeared. "Sorry about that."

"Oh no, it's… fine…?" Chrom shrugged. "...nevermind the fact that you're extremely brutal when it comes to combat and you look like a demon with that whole eye thing. You seem to know your way with tactics."

"Really? ...I jus' thought that was common knowledge. An' I'm drunk!"

"So THAT'S what the smell is…" Lissa said to herself.

"Common knowledge or not, though, you were excellent out there. My group could use someone with your skills."

"I already got a job, an' that's blowin' people up. Depends on what the pay is."

"It's... not really a job. We're a militia called the Shepherds. We're a group of warriors who serve under my older sister, Exhalt Emmeryn, in the name of peace." Chrom smiled, looking off at the sun with his cape flapping triumphantly behind him.

"Peace? ...didn't we just slaughter a bunch of bandits?" Demo scratched his head.

"...err… we FIGHT in the name of peace."

"That sounds like an oxymoron. ...how the bloody 'ell did I pronounce that right…?"

"Listen, we do the dirty work so that others can live without having to fight for their lives. We need a tactician to join our ranks, and you show some promise. Would you like to join us?"

"Listen 'ere, lad. I don't even know what yer talkin' aboot wit' all o' yer 'exhalt'in and 'Ylisse'in. Aren't we in Teufort?"

The three exchanged glances and shook their heads.

"...then where the 'ELL AM I?!"

"Ylisse." They all said at the same time.

Demo was silent. His face looked puzzled. And then it hit him. ...We're a looong way from Teufort, Eyelander. He thought. "...Sorry. I was lost fer a moment. I guess I'll join ye on yer crusade against pitiful bandits er wotever. Don't really have a choice. I don't even remember how I got 'ere, so goin' back home isn't happenin'. Remind me to never drink too much. But don't ban drinking from me. You'll die if ye try to sober me up."

"Welcome to the Shepherds, Demo." Chrom smiled and pat his shoulder.