Title: It's Not Easy To Be Me

Rating: K

Summary: The Doctor talks about how it's not easy to be him. Songfic.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

Author's Note: Okay, the song It's Not Easy To Be Me is actually meant to be about Superman, but it also workd really well for the Doctor. As you read, please dismiss anything that's an obvious reference to Superman. BTW there's a beautiful vid that inspired this. It's at: http://www(dot)youtube(dot)com/watch?vDuZEk1XnP0

It's Not Easy To Be Me

I am the Doctor. Well, the Doctor's not really my name. But hey, Elton John's not Elton John's real name. Anyway, I find the Doctor easier to go by. It's more interesting than any ordinary name. Not that my name's that ordinary for you humans. You could probably barely be able to pronounce it, no offence. Um, sorry, I'm rambling. I'd better get to the point.

I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naïve
I'm just out to find
The better part of me

So, you may ask me: Why travel through time and space? Why live a life full of death and destruction? Well, to be honest it feels good to do good. I know that sounds really cliché and stuff, but it's true. That feeling you get after helping someone makes it all worthwhile.

I'm more than a bird
I'm more than a plane
More than some pretty face
Beside a train

It's not easy to be me

There's a lot more to me than meets the eye. When people pass me in the street, they acknowledge me, then dismiss me. They may even smile at me (I've been getting a lot of that this incarnation). But if they knew what I've been through, what's going on inside my head, I don't think they could stand it.

Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees

Whenever there's chaos and everyone's running around like a headless chicken, it's up to me to save the day. To stand tall and make sense of everything. And even after 900 years, it's still hard to be the hero all the time. Sometimes I just want to break down and cry. But I can't. People depend on me.

Find a way to lie
About a home I'll never see

Gallifrey. My home. Destroyed. Gone forever. When people meet me, I wish I could tell them I'm just on holiday and I'll go back there soon. But I can't go back, because there's nothing to go back to.

It may sound absurd
but don't be naïve-
Even Heroes have the right to bleed

Sometimes people think that because I'm an alien I don't have feelings. Oh how wrong they are. I hurt more than you could imagine.

I may be disturbed
but won't you concede?
Even Heroes have the right to dream

It's not easy to be me

Occasionally I think about what life would be like if I was a totally different person. Someone with no burdens, no responsibilities other than putting the bin out once a week. But I'm not that person. I'm a sad, messed up Time Lord.

Up, up and away: away from me
It's all right
You can all sleep sound tonight
I'm not crazy or anything

Before you call the loony bin, just wait a sec. People can have trouble accepting me and my life. I'll admit it: it's kinda weird. But there's so much more out there, I just happen to be a part of it.

I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naïve
Men weren't meant to ride
With clouds between their knees

It's only natural for people to stay put, to dig themselves into a hole. My people didn't do that. They developed great technology that gave them the universe. But with that they gave themselves a terrible curse. To explore the wonders of the universe you must also see the pain of the universe. And every little bit of pain makes me more fragile.

I'm only a man in a silly red sheet
Digging for kryptonite on this one way street
Only a man in a funny red sheet
Looking for special things inside of me

As time goes on, I discover more things about myself. I can be grumpy. I can be witty. I can be rude. I can be funny. I can love. I can laugh. I can cry.

Inside of me
Inside of me
Inside of me
Inside of me

I'm only a man in a funny red sheet
I'm only a man looking for a dream

I want to be happy. I want to find enlightenment. Some philosophers sit at desks all day trying to find the secrets of the universe. I go out there and live it.

I'm only a man in a funny red sheet
It's not easy …

I am the Doctor, and it's not easy to be me. But I wouldn't have it any other way.

It's not easy to be me.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I've been listening to that song all the time since I recorded it off YouTube. It's so beautiful! You know what else is beautiful? Reviews!