(The original song was famously written by Dr Seuss for the movie adaptation of his story How the Grinch Stole Christmas, in which it was performed by Thurl Ravenscroft; due to a credit omission in the film, the singing is occasionally misattributed to narrator Boris Karloff.
I was going to rewrite it to be about Bog, but 'Bog King' didn't have enough syllables, 'Boggy-Woggy' had too many, and 'Mister Bog' suggested it was a Human AU. Then I realized the 'Marianne' was a perfect syllable match and that I haven't rewritten any songs to be about her yet.)
You're a tough one,
Marianne,
Crushing foes under your heel,
And you make them thank you for it;
Vicious as a leopard seal,
Marianne!
An amazing fighter and you're
Sharper than steel!
You're amazing,
Marianne.
Your heart's my only goal!
Your brain is full of brilliance.
You've an equally brilliant soul,
Marianne!
And you hit so powerfully …
Maybe stronger than a black hole!
You're so vicious,
Marianne.
Though there aren't fangs in your smile,
Something about it reminds me
Of a hungry crocodile,
Marianne!
Given the choice between the two of you,
I'm less scared of the crocodile!
You're ferocious,
Marianne;
A trait no one can debunk!
You're punchier than fruit punch and
Your spirit's full of spunk,
Marianne!
A phrase I've heard describe your style is as follows,
And I quote:
"Fairy
Princess
Punk!"
You are gorgeous,
Marianne …
Hotter than a volcano!
Your wings are made of amethyst
When the moon sets them aglow,
Marianne!
Your eyes are a beautiful shade of brown,
Outlined with dark makeup that faintly glitters in a manner reminiscent of distant nebulae,
The contrast of which turns your eyes gold!
You terrify me,
Marianne;
You send shivers down my spine.
You frighten and inspire me
Until I speak in rhyme,
Marianne!
I can't stop thinking about how much I want to kiss you –
All of the time!