It's a strange sight to see a cafeteria where the food is served by robots for robots. It's stranger still to see Doctor Eggman visit it. Eggpawn, badnik and even Metal Sonic were bemused to see their lord and master in person here.
He is flanked by his two minions Orbot and Cubot. Eggman's eyes glazed the room like icing on a particularly delicious cake.
"As you can see boss, the workers have really taken a shine to the cafeteria you built. Morale has gone up by a generous estimate of 3.14%" the articulate Orbot uttered facts.
"Yes, yes, you said something urgent had to be bought to my attention?" Eggman said. He had no time for anyone's satisfaction other than his own.
"Right here boss!" shouted Cubot as he flew over to a worker bot and picked up a cup on his tray before flying back to Eggman. Eggman peered into the cup, containing slick, crude oil.
"Oil. What of it?" Eggman asked.
"This 'oil', if you can call it that, is quite simply inedible" Cubot asserted, forcing the cup into Eggman's face. "You try it!"
Eggman was indignant "I'm not a robot you nitwit" he said as he took the cup and proceeded to throw the contents onto Cubot. Eggman walked out of the cafeteria, his minions in tow.
He walked back to his huge, daunting central chamber, which could be described as a throne room for the seat in the centre and the way that Eggman presented himself upon ones entry. He took his seat at the throne with a big sigh.
"I'm listening to Cubot lodge a complaint. Do I really have nothing better to do with my time?" he moaned.
"You could listen to 'me' complain sir" said Orbot, trying to please his boss.
"Well it can't be any sillier than the oil. Go ahead Orbot". Eggman crossed his legs and joined his arms in an inquisitive style.
"Well… you could fix the toilet on the 14th floor."
Eggman was staggered. "What? you're a robot! You don't use the toilet!"
"Not for me sir, but I'm just saying, in case we ever get guests…"
"Guests? GUESTS!? In what alternate reality would I, Doctor Eggman, accept guests in his evil headquarters!?" Eggman flew up from his chair in a rage.
"Well there was the Deadly Six…"
"Still never got my money back for that giant sandwich."
"And there was Infinite…"
"That coward has run off with my Phantom Ruby! No sign of him after all this time"
"Well, his power IS illusions" Cubot butted in, wiping his face down with a paper towel.
"You stay out of this!" Eggman sat back down in his chair, sighing once again. The robots could tell that he was just fed up.
"Is this what I'm reduced to? Picking up from the failures of my own lackeys while SONIC… still eludes my grasp? I've been doing this for so long." Eggman put his face down in his hands.
"Cheer up boss. We'll just make another Phantom Ruby" Orbot tried to cheer Eggman up but it was no use.
"My Death Egg Robot was destroyed. I need to use a Mobian as a conduit. Even with Infinite, it required so much energy that it was simply unsustainable. The illusions only weakened over time. That alternate dimension Sonic beat Chaos in ONE HIT!"
"So we'll find another way. We always do." Orbot assured.
"Oh yeah, like what? Sonic just going to warp in here and get captured?"
Just then, the most remarkable thing happened. Readings started going off the charts and electricity sparked everywhere.
"What's going on!?" screamed Eggman.
"Hit the deck!" Shouted Cubot as everyone did so. Then, a bright flash engulfed the room. All was silent for a while except for a strange, ragged breathing. Eggman peered through his hands to the source.
There, lying on the floor of the room, trying to stand up, was SONIC!
"Sonic!" shouted Eggman as he jumped for his console and pushed a big red button. A cage came down from the ceiling and trapped Sonic. An entire arsenal of guns and cannons came down from the ceiling and through the walls and up from the floors, pointing directly at the cage.
Sonic slowly turned around. He too was surprised. "Oh no. Robotnik's here too?" He tried to pry open the cage.
But he couldn't. He tried using his back quills to shave the cage's bar but they were a thought material. Eggman was bemused by this turn of events.
"Whatever process that warped him here must have drained his energy. He's as weak as a kitten! HOHOHOHOHOHOHO!" Eggman chortled in supreme victory.
"But… what brought him here in the first place?" asked Cubot
"Who cares? I've captured Sonic. It's almost too good to be true!"
"That might be the case" muttered Orbot.
"What!?" shouted Eggman. He walked over to where Orbot was looking on a computer monitor.
"A live recording of a hostile encounter in Bridge Zone. Happening right now." He said. Eggman peered at the screen. He saw the rolling wood bridges and a small scouting forces in an engagement with the enemy. A blue blur hopping and bopping along with debris flying over the edges.
"SONIC?!" Eggman screamed. He looked back at the desperate Sonic in the cage, then back to the fasted thing alive wrecking his robots in Bridge Zone.
"But…but…he's here… and… he's there…" He looked back and forth between them. He marched over to the Sonic in the cage.
"You! Explain this! What are you?" he demanded, index finger pointed solidly in his direction.
Sonic just looked at Eggman with a cold glare. "I don't have to explain anything to you, Robotnik".
Eggman was taken aback by this. He stepped away, walking toward his chair.
"Ro-bot-nik?" asked Orbot.
"What is that, some kind of cartoon villain?" pondered Cubot
"No, you nincompoops. Robotnik is my real last name. What mother calls their kid 'Eggman'?" Eggman said.
"So your name isn't Doctor Eggman?" Cubot asked.
"No. That's merely a cunning alias. I am Doctor Ivo Robotnik. But still, that's a name I haven't heard in a long time."
"Eggman. That's a good one. I gotta tell the others." The Sonic in the cage snarked.
"Of course you would you spiky little…" Eggman was going to retort back but he stopped. He noticed something.
"Boss?" asked Orbot. Eggman turned his seat around, beckoning his followers. He engaged them in a private conversation.
"Calling me by my real name and then not knowing about the Eggman name? Something is up with that hedgehog."
"Maybe the warp fried his brains" Cubot proposed.
"Maybe it fried YOUR brains. Need I remind you that Sonic is simultaneously in that cage but also in Bridge Zone?"
"Schrödinger's Sonic. In a constant state of captured and not captured." Wondered Orbot.
"Possibly." Said Eggman. "Or maybe something much simpler." He pushed some buttons on his wrist watch.
"Performing a few scans might shed some light on this puzzle." After a minute or so, the reports came back.
"Environment Scan complete. Of note: excessive amounts of Eggman Rays located around Sonic". The speaker on the watch announced.
"Eggman Rays?" asked Cubot.
"A discovery I made some years ago. Remember Blaze the Cat and my pale imitation, Eggman Nega?"
Orbot and Cubot shook their heads "No".
"Of course you don't. You weren't built back then. Much more pleasant times. Anyway, I noticed that whenever they travelled, they left behind a strange radiation. It wasn't fatal or even harmful, but I wondered if it could be linked to dimensional travel. Surely enough when Sonic and Tails found themselves in Blaze's dimension, they brought back the radiation upon their return. As a final example that alternate dimension Sonic I mentioned earlier came through an unintended side effect of the Phantom Ruby's power. He too carried Eggman Waves. I just named the discovery.
"So if this Sonic has brought these Eggman Rays…" began Orbot.
"Yes. This Sonic is from another dimension. One where I must still exist but haven't adopted my Eggman moniker."
"Oh boy! We've discovered an alien life form. It belongs in a museum!" Cubot shouted with glee.
"No it belongs in that cage! And it's not an alien, it's merely another version of Sonic. Other than surface details, I can't really gleam much about his other dimension without further research. Other than that, he's useless to me."
The room was silent. Then Orbot spoke.
"Well, I'll throw this Sonic in the dungeon and reset the traps."
Just then, an idea flew into Eggmans ear.
"Traps?" he asked
"The cage, the guns and everything in the room. Have to reset and recalibrate all of them. Individually. With no help." Orbot pouted as he floated off.
Eggman's idea grew and grew until he got the biggest grin on his face. He had and evil, dastardly plan.
"Great idea Orbot. Do that at once. And while you're at it, dispatch the Supreme Egg Pawn to Bridge Zone."
Orbot and Cubot were surprised.
"The...supreme...egg pawn? But didn't you yourself describe it as an I quote "a failure only eclipsed by the time I trapped Sonic in a Labyrinth"? Orbot asked.
"Yes I did but that's the thing with garbage. You throw it away. And in this case I am throwing it away."
Orbot remarked "I still don't understand."
Eggman just ignored him. "Cubot. Prepare the film cameras."
"A tramissison. Yeah boy! Those babies hgave been sleeping since 2001, ready to shine again!" Cubot was really happy.
"Yes yes, I wonder why I never make those sorts of broadcasts anymore. Guess the public's weak hearts can't handle my raw edge"
Cubot just flew off.
Eggman looked to the Sonci in the cage. "I don't believe we've been introduced. My name is Doctor Eggman".
"A ro-butt-nick by any other name would stink just as pungent" the Sonic replied. Eggman reacted with indignation.
Eggman just hovered over Sonic and growled. "The only thing that will stink in here... are the corpses."