The Guardians had saved the kingdom of Valenia from a group of mercenaries from the rival kingdom, Abluta. The kingdom of Valenia held a dinner in their honor, which didn't go great from Peter constantly referencing things no one understood to Drax and Mantis being socially awkward to Rocket making criticisms and quips about the various people at the table to no one literally understanding anything Groot was saying. However, it went more or less okay until Baleena, The Princess of Valenia, came in, announcing that someone had stolen her prized necklace.
The Guardians went back to The Milano after dinner, as the Guardians were looking for the thief who stole the necklace. But Peter was sure who stole it. His fuzzy, little "friend" Rocket. As they walked back towards The Milano, Peter kept glaring at Rocket. When they got in, Rocket had finally had enough and snapped.
"What is it, Quill?", Rocket asked, annoyed.
"You stole that necklace, didn't you?", Quill said, demanding a confession out of him.
"What are you talking about?! I didn't steal her flarking necklace!", Rocket said defensively.
"Bullcrap, we all know you stole her necklace!", Peter snapped back, "What the hell man?! You told us you would no longer steal things you didn't need!"
"I'm not going to do that anymore and I promise you I didn't steal that stupid necklace!", Rocket said angrily, trying to defend himself, "Besides why would I even need that dumb necklace? I've already got thousands of necklaces I've stolen in the past!"
"Yeah, that really makes me think you didn't steal her necklace", Peter said sarcastically, "You know what, I'm afraid I have no choice. I'm going to let the team decide but I think you should be kicked out of the Guardians"
The other Guardians couldn't believe what they were hearing. Peter wanted to kick Rocket out?
"Anyway, who votes that Rocket should be kicked out?"
Peter raised his hand but, surprisingly to him, no one else did.
"I said, who votes that Rocket should be kicked out?"
Still, the rest of the team didn't raise their hands.
"Really? You really want Rocket to stay?", Peter asked, dumbfounded.
"Why wouldn't we?", Drax asked, confused.
"Why would we? The guy's a dick! He is always at odds with everyone, always either making fun of people or shouting at people, and he's also a goddamned hypocrite because he makes fun of everyone yet when people make fun of HIM he takes it personally! Not only that but he's always putting us in trouble because he's always stealing things from or trying to kil the people HE'S SUPPOSED TO GUARD because he's supposed to be a GUARDIAN OF THE GALAXY!"
"I said I'd stop that!", Rocket snapped.
"Yeah and you lied to us and just stole something else!", Peter snapped again.
"First of all, Peter, how do we know Rocket stole that necklace?", Gamora asked, defending Rocket, "and second of all, yes, Rocket isn't the nicest guy but most of the things you complain about Rocket are things the whole team, including you, is guilty of doing"
"Yeah, I know were more like The Bundys than the Bradys but at least were all capable of being nice to each other when we feel like it! Rocket has NEVER said anything nice to anyone! So why keep someone who, even by our standards, is such a douchebag around?!"
"Hey, I can be nice to you!", Rocket snapped, "and I have your back when were fighting"
"Yes you do", Gamora said, "Plus Rocket is very important for the team. Without him, who would we get to build our weapons, our guns, or any device we use in battle?"
"We can just get someone else whose good with that stuff", Peter said.
The Guardians couldn't believe their ears. Quill thought Rocket, someone they've known for months now and had developed at least somewhat of a bond with, even if he kept a giant distance between everyone, is just replaceable? Like that?
Gamora, Drax, Mantis, and Baby Groot then looked at each other and decided their was only one thing to do.
"You know what, Peter, instead of getting rid of Rocket, I think you need to have a talk with him", Gamora said.
"Ha, I can spend hours with him but he'll never admit to anything!", Quill said.
"Because I didn't do anything", Rocket said, annoyed.
"Yeah right", Peter said sarcastically.
The other Guardians started to leave.
"Well, were just going to leave you alone and maybe you two can work something out", Gamora said.
Suddenly the other Guardians left and closed the door behind them. Rocket and Peter just crossed their arms and glared at each other angrily.
"You wanna talk about something I DIDN'T DO?", Rocket kept insisting.
"No 'cause I know you did it and this is stupid. Let's just get out of here", Peter said.
He then walked over to the door and tried opening it only to realize it wasn't opening. He kept budging and budging but it wouldn't open.
"What the-?", Peter asked, confounded.
Suddenly, Gamora popped up.
"We knew you would probably try walking out of this so we locked you in", Gamora said.
"Dammit Gamora, open the door this instant!", Peter demanded.
"Not until you two work things out", Drax said.
"And then maybe we can all hug and get along again and pet the puppy together", Mantis said, excited.
"Not happening!", Rocket shouted.
"Yeah I'm not petting him and I'm not talking things out with him. It's a lost cause, guys, and you might as well just open the door", Peter said.
"Were not doing that, Peter", Gamora said, "Just try to talk with him and I'm sure you'll get through to him"
Peter grumbled and walked back to Rocket. He sat down and crossed his arms.
"So, how about you go first?", Peter said.
"No, you can go first", Rocket said.
"No, you go first!", Peter answered childishly.
"Nah, that's okay, YOU can go first", Rocket childishly answered back.
"Well, their forcing us to talk so I guess I'll just go first. What the hell man?! You said that you'd never steal anything you didn't need and yet you had to steal that necklace!", Peter said, "What is your problem? Why can't you act like a decent guy for 5 minutes?! Is that asking too much of you?! Is it?!"
"That's because I-", Rocket started.
"Oh shut up! We all know you stole the necklace!", Quill said.
Rocket crossed his arms.
"Okay Smart Guy, what makes you think I stole it?", Rocket asked.
"I dunno, maybe because you steal things all the time like that guys leg, those batteries, and you attempted to steal that guys eye once, among things", Peter listed.
"So your only evidence is because I've stolen things in the past? That's pretty weak, even for you Quill!", Rocket said.
"Yeah well maybe if you haven't stolen things all the damn time, I'd believe you if you said you didn't steal the necklace", Peter snapped back.
"You idiot, just because I've done something in the past, even a lot, doesn't mean I'm guilty of doing something again. You gotta find some, oh yeah, EVIDENCE to convict me of having stolen something I DID NOT STEAL", Rocket said.
Peter looked at Rocket. He then started walking towards Rocket, which freaked him out.
"Uhh, Quill, what are ya doing?", Rocket said, worried.
Quickly, Quill picked Rocket up and started searching in his pockets.
"Dammit Quill, put me down! What the hell do you think your doing?!", Rocket pleaded.
"If you're not going to admit to stealing the necklace, I'll just have to look for it myself", Peter said.
"This is weird, Star Dork, even for you!", Rocket said.
"Well, desperate times call for desperate measures", Peter said as he searched through Rocket's right pocket. However, he was surprised to see he couldn't find anything. He turned Rocket over and looked in Rocket's other pocket only to find it wasn't there either. This just annoyed Rocket. Finally, he bit Peter in the hand, which caused him to yelp and drop Rocket.
"See, I'm not carrying the necklace, now do you believe me?!", Rocket asked.
"Not necessarily, how do I know you didn't ask Groot to carry it?", Peter asked.
Rocket just looked at him, dumbfounded, as he couldn't believe Peter STILL believed there was a way he could've stolen the necklace.
"And where would he have hidden it?!", Rocket shouted.
Peter thought about it and realized Rocket was right. Groot couldn't have hidden it anywhere.
"Okay, I'm sorry I thought you stole the necklace", Peter said, "It's just hard for me to trust you because you've proven to be untrustworthy so many times".
"Actually, that's another thing, Star Dork, I didn't like what you said back there! So I'm mean! So what?! Gamora's mean and Drax ain't exactly the nicest guy ever but you don't give them crap about it! Oh and about me giving other people shit yet being defensive when people make fun of me?! Well, if you were mistreated and looked down upon your whole life, you probably wouldn't exactly have a sense of humor about yourself! But, Quill, you don't think I care about you?"
"Well, it's not that I don't think that, it's just…I know the whole team is always at each other's throats and always argues but at least we sometimes say nice things to each other…except for you. I've never seen you say anything nice about anyone", Peter complained.
"Really? Never? I'm sorry, didn't we go parachuting together once?", Rocket asked.
"Well…yeah", Quill had to admit.
"And didn't we have a fun time together?", Rocket kept asking.
"Yeah, we did", Quill kept admitting.
"Also, why do you think I keep playing your music? It's because I love it!", Rocket admitted, "you know why? Because, as much of an idiot as you are, I actually like you. Not as much as Groot but of the team I'd say your, eh, my 3rd favorite person in the team".
"Well if you like me so much, why do you keep mocking me and trying to get on my nerves?", Peter asked.
"I mock you for the same reason you mock me, because I'm just teasing you. As for getting on your nerves, I get everyone angry, your not special in that regard! I just do what I do and don't really care whether or not people like it, okay?!"
"Yeah, well that philosophy has gotten us in trouble a lot, dude!", Peter said, 'I'd start being more careful if I were you".
Rocket sighed.
"Listen Quill, I'm not trying to push people away anymore, it's just the way I am. You know how I was brought up, if you lived like that, would you exactly be a nice guy?"
"Well, I didn't exactly have a great upbringing either but I don't act like you! I don't try to get on people's nerves and act like a 100% utter douchebag!", Peter said.
Rocket was sad.
"You think I'm a 100% utter douchebag?", Rocket said sadly.
Peter realized he hurt Rocket's feelings. He didn't mean to, it's just that sometimes Rocket annoyed him a little too much. Rocket just walked away, wallowing in his sadness.
"Hey Man, I'm sorry, you're not a 100% utter douchebag, maybe just an…80% douchebag?", Peter said, trying to make the situation better.
But Rocket kept looking down. Peter looked at his Zune. He searched a song and put it on. Suddenly, Come Together by The Beatles started playing. Peter started tapping along to the beat.
"Here come old flat-top, he come grooving up slowly. He got ju-ju eyeballs, he's one holy roller. He got hair down to his knees. Got to be a joker, he just do what he please", Peter started singing.
Rocket looked at him and started humming along.
"He wear no shoeshine, he's got toe jam football, he got monkey finger, he shoot Coca Cola, He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free", Rocket sang.
Then the chorus kicked in and together they sang "Come together, right now over me"
As the song kept playing, they looked at each other and smiled. Then they continued singing along as the song kept going.
"He wear no shoeshine, he's got toe-jam football. He got monkey finger, he shoot Coca-Cola. He say, "I know you, you know me". One thing I can tell you is you got to be free. Come together, right now over me. He bag production, he got walrus gumboot. He's got Ono sideboard, he one spinal cracker. He got feet down below his knee Hold you in his armchair, you can feel his disease. Come together right now over me", Rocket and Peter sang together.
Then, as the instrumentals kicked in, they danced and danced to it.
Then they sang, "He roller-coaster, he got early warning. He got muddy water, he one mojo filter. He say, "One and one and one is three". Got to be good looking 'cause he's so hard to see! Come together, right now! Over me!"
Then they danced as the instrumentals came on and they kept singing whenever The Beatles sang "Come Together".
While Rocket and Peter were dancing and singing along to Come Together, The Guardians were watching TV. Then a special report came on!
An Alien Newscaster said, "Breaking news, the thief who stole Princess Baleena's necklace has been found!"
Suddenly, the news cut to a clip of an Ablutan mercenary was getting arrested.
"An Ablutan general named Zar was found trying to sneak out of Valenia with the necklace in hand!"
Suddenly, the other Guardians lit up.
"The Puppy is innocent! I knew he was!", Mantis said happily.
"This is great! Now Peter can get off of Rocket's back!", Gamora said.
The Guardians went back to the door, about to tell Rocket and Peter the thief had been found. However, when they got there, they found Rocket and Peter dancing together.
Mantis was confused.
"So are The Puppy and Peter friends again?", Mantis asked.
Gamora thought about it.
"It seems like it", Gamora said.
Then The Guardians watched as Rocket and Peter danced.
The End