A/N: This takes place after the events of Absolute Justice. It does not follow all the events that have occurred throughout the seasons, but I will keep it as close to the series as possible. Reviews are very much appreciated.
Title: Gravity
Author: Sleepy Gecko
Pairing: Chloe/Oliver
Rating: PG-13...ish.
Disclaimer: If I had anything to do with Smallville, I don't think I would be on this site.
Some days Chloe Sullivan could barely recognize the face that stared back at her, other days not at all. But, through the fogged mirror she always saw someone who was very much afraid. Raking her fingers back through her short hair she met her reflection with a defiant glare. The boys were strong and they needed her to be strong for them. And, then, she saw it. The glint of insanity hidden within the emerald depths. She wasn't surprised. Fear does that. Terror, love, sorrow—they fade with time. Fear surrounds, seeping into the body until it needs it to survive. And, she was very much afraid. Consumed by it every night as she stood in her tower as the invisible guardian angel to her heroes. The emotions had slowly crept form her mind and rooted themselves in her heart. It became a poison; eating away at her soul and whispering promises of failure. Some nights when they returned with injuries she could have stopped had she only noticed that extra guard, been watching the progress of the right member, or told them to move a second faster; she cursed herself.
Only when she thought she would die from the agony did the familiar pull appear. The whispered voice telling her to leave, giving her directions into the unknown. Her fingers gripped the edges of the sink and she shook her head trying to empty her mind of the honeyed promised and captivating assurances held within the echoing murmurs.
"Shut up...shut up....shut up!"
Silence. Beautiful sweet emptiness met her outburst. Taking ragged breath she fell to her knees, she wouldn't let it defeat her. She would not become her mother. Tears fell untamed from her eyes; her arms wrapped around her shuddering frame.
She pulled her clothes on mechanically. With an air of clinical detachment she tightened her belt and pulled on a shirt that swallowed her thin frame. Did they notice? The extra makeup to hide the circles under her eyes or all the weight she had lost over the past months? Even if they did, it didn't matter. She was there for them, not the other way around. It was time to go to work
The map stretched out on the table in front of her as she plotted out possible points for the 33.1 lab suspected to be hidden in the Rocky Mountains. Typing a few more coordinates into the computer, she frowned as the satellite feed showed nothing but wilderness. It was going to be a long night.
"Watchtower to Impulse."
"Hey, beautiful. You sound as sexy as ever. Couldn't wait to get me on the line, huh?
"I'd be lost without you," she laughed. "What is your location?"
"Just completed preliminary perimeter search. We are in the clear, this place is quiet as a grave."
"Thermals show the building is clear. Enter on three. One. Two. Three."
"Watchtower. The place is empty. Whatever Luthor had here is gone. Looks like another fake lead."
"Damn. Exit the area, Impulse. We're down for the night. Good job."
"Till tomorrow, Watchtower. Impulse, out."
Chloe slammed her fist down against the desk. Another worthless night.
"Dammit!"
"Chloe?"
A hand grasped her shoulder and shook her gently. Slowly she lifted her head and sat back into her chair. Looking up at Oliver with a small smile, she stifled a yawn.
"Sorry, its been a long night. Do you need anything?"
He frowned as he released her shoulder.
"No, I was just heading out for the night. You should go to bed."
Her eyes narrowed for a split second and then her face glowed in a flawless smile. She innerly scolded herself for letting her mask slip. Oliver and her had been at odds lately. Their hints of a relationship having vanished in a flurry of distrust and unspoken thoughts. Where had they gone wrong? But, maybe this was right. Coworkers in justice, Green Arrow and Watchtower, anything else would be a weakness.
"You're probably right."
They fell into silence and her eyes drifted back down to the map. Her lips tilted in a smirk. The awkwardness could be cut with a knife, possibly a spoon.
"Well..."
"Good night, Ollie."
"Yeah, good night."
She rose from her chair and cast Oliver what she hoped was a reassuring smile.
"Chloe, are you alright?" He grasped her shoulders and looked at her imploringly. "You can talk to me, to any of us. You know that."
Did she? She wasn't so sure. What would they say if they actually knew? She could already hear their concerns and condemnation. Flashes of psychologists and endless tests ran through her mind and filled her with dread. She could practically feel the itchy gray fabric. Phantom metal cuffs held her in place. In the blink of an eye she was back in the tower, face to face with Oliver's concerned eyes.
"It's nothing. Just tired."
"Get some rest, sidekick. You've earned it."
After another hour of relentlessly searching for Luthor's new hideout, Chloe finally agreed with Oliver. She did deserve some rest. Collapsing onto her bed she stared up at the ceiling, longing for sleep to claim her.
"Chloe Sullivan it is time."
Wind ripped around her, tossing her hair to and fro as she wrapped around her defensively. There was darkness. Complete. Overwhelming. Unseen creatures crawled over her, the caress of a thousand different demons.
"Leave me alone!" she screamed. She would not be her mother. She was strong. She was strong. She was—
"You cannot run. There is no escape. You and I, we are one. Always." The voice hissed, echoing around her in a condemning melody.
"I'm not her. I wont lose like she did."
"You want this. Otherwise you would ask for help."
"I don't need help, I'm in control. I don't need them to defeat you."
"Foolish one. I am you. Just as you are me."
She woke in a cold sweat. Rubbing her temples, she took deep breaths trying to calm her nervous heartbeat. Maybe it was time to ask for help.