It was a bright sunny day in Quwrof Wrlccywrlir's lemon orchard. The lemons were at the peak of ripeness, the succulent fruits just begging to be plucked from their branch and squeezed, their juices dripping everywhere..

Chrollo's hired hand, Ludwig Beilschmidt, walked amongst the lemon trees, breathing in their earthy scent. He loved to be out here in nature. The relaxing setting helped him to forget about his bitter divorce with his one true love, Feliciano. Furthermore, it gave him time to think. No setting was better for conjuring up what new objects to further damage his mutilated penis with than underneath the peacefully swaying lemon trees. Currently, Ludwig was in a creative rut. It had been more than 2 years since he had last fucked an object. It was unlike him to go so long without giving into the hedonistic pleasure of his masochistic desires and absolutely destroying his genitals in the process. Fortunately, due multiple infections in his penis from the various elements he had exposed it to, many of the cuts on his dick had never properly healed, providing a much appreciated chronic pain. However, Ludwig craved more.

Currently, he sat down under a lemon tree to ponder his choices. Pinecone? Done that. Potato? Ugh, that was so June 30 2014. He had fucked so many objects, it seemed like there was nothing new to satisfy him. What else could he possibly fuck that would bring him intense physical pain?

Suddenly, an unfortunately dull pain reverberated against Ludwig's skull. What was that? He looked down to see the offending object that had fallen on his head...

One big, bright, beautiful ripe lemon.

In a moment of newtonian enlightenment, Ludwig Beilschmidt had an epiphany.

He knew what he had to do.

He immediately set to work peeling off his bicycle shorts, revealing his oozing, pus encrusted penis. He looked around tentatively, making sure Chrollo was not around to see the defilement of one of his prize winning lemons. After deeming that the coast was clear, Ludwig carved a small hole into the lemon with his trusty pocket knife. Smelling the bright scent of that delectably sour lemon brought Ludwig to full arousal in 3 seconds. He could not hold back any longer; he immediately plunged his mutilated penis straight into the lemon's dripping hole. Ludwig moaned in pleasure and pain as he felt the lemon's acid immediately seared the nerve endings in the open wounds on his penis. The stinging sensation left him on a high that was unlike any other. This, this had been what he had been missing the last 2 years! He felt a sense of calm wash over him as he grew closer and closer to the best orgasm of his life. In his bliss, however, he failed to notice a shadowy figure lurking beyond the lemon trees...

"What are you doing?!" Chrollo bellowed in a noble tone. The degradation in his tone fed into Ludwig's humiliation kink and he came immediately. "What are you doing to my delectable lemons?" He pounded his fist against Ludwig's chest with the force of 5008 rabbits. The sudden shock in combination with his heightened heart rate due to his orgasm sent Ludwig into immediate cardiac arrest. He died quickly. His last thoughts, however, were about how it was all worth it.

FIN.